


Veracity

by faemalenomad



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Dialogue Heavy, F/F, F/M, Female Protagonist, Rule 63, Slow Build, fem!snape
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-06
Updated: 2019-10-25
Packaged: 2019-11-12 23:39:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 36
Words: 125,578
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18020687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faemalenomad/pseuds/faemalenomad
Summary: Severa (called Vera by her one and only friend, much to her annoyance) is having a rough Fifth Year. She's not getting any notice from her peers about her proficiency in the Dark Arts, and she's losing the only person she cares about to her own ambition. After an agreement with her rival, James Potter, they have decided to put their differences aside after a series of bizarre circumstances involving blackmail, break-ins, near-werewolf experiences, Unforgivables, and illegal potion making - to discover a plot to blackmail the Minister while trying come up with a plausible cover story for their partnership. With a life-debt in the mix, will these two find common ground? And who is using who?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't think I'd write fanfiction again, but I've been toying with this idea for a while. It's an AU, and its definitely not canon compliant, as you can tell. This won't be a case where even though the genders are changed, the story will stay the same, this will go off the rails fairly early on. I should note that this story is rated M for depictions of unhealthy relationships, and potentially emotional abuse. Many of the characters in this story have unhealthy coping mechanisms and lash out. I'm aware this concept isn't original, but my story is my own and I haven't seen this angle. I apologize for how ridiculous this will get, but hopefully you will have fun reading it along the way.

Snape adjusted her robes and scowled as she tried to get the residue of Bubotuber pus. Its foul stench only seeping further into her threadbare clothing. This was her last good pair of robes.

Black had charmed her plant to spurt at her in anger. As the pus burned her face and stung her eyes, she could hear Potter make a snide comment about how it will help clear her spots.

Black retorted that it should clear the rest of her face, then they wouldn't have to look at her.

She cursed the blasted Gryffindor boys who had made her life a living hell these past few years. The so-called Marauders, an apt name, terrorized the school with their pranks with barely any consequences. Just a few detentions which they laughed off with ease. Of course, she wasn't one to let these slights pass. She would have her revenge.

But first, she was due to meet Lily in the library to revise their Arithmancy essays.

Lily was already there, scribbling like mad. Snape loved to watch her work, her frenetic energy buzzing as her magic was quietly humming along. Snape took a seat next to Lily.

"Hullo Vera, you're late." She looked up from her work and let out a warm smile. Lily technically smiled at everyone, but somehow Snape felt like this smile was for her. Snape never really liked the nickname, but Lily had been calling her that since they were ten, and didn't seem likely to stop.

"Sorry, had to deal with cleanup after our Herbology session."

"But you got out of the Hospital Wing hours ago, I was with you." Lily's voice was laced with concern, but her eyes were filled with suspicion. "Were you thinking of ditching me?"

"You know I'd never do that." Snape snapped. "Sorry." She apologized seeing Lily's scowl.

"Then where were you? Were you with Pritchard and Mulciber?"

"If you must know, I was cleaning my robes, which are still rank from that prank your fellow Housemate pulled on me this afternoon. And, if I was with Honoria or Cassius, what of it? They're my friends Lils." Snape pulled out her book from her knapsack and opened it to the assignment. "I think we should make up for lost time and just compare answers. If there's any discrepencies we can talk though the problem."

"So you're going to deflect from the real issue at hand?" Lily was picking at her quill. She must be irritated.

"I think if we look at the quincunx pattern created by the spell, we can use it trace a five point stencil, which will allow us to find the derivative." Snape rambled.

"You know I could have a word with them, if you feel like you need those toffs in your house to counterbalance the Marauders, you don't. You have me, you have Mary, Marlene…."

"I know who I have Lily. And do you think I'd risk you putting yourself at Potter's mercy for my sake?" Snape studied her for any reaction, but she just laughed.

"I can handle Potter. If he tries to be fresh with me, I'll hex him, nothing new." She tucked a strand of her thick red hair behind her ear. "We aren't finished with this conversation Vera."

After they finished their assignment, Snape headed to the Common Room. It was mid-September and already the damp was setting in. The shadows of the fire danced high in the dark room. Her fellow Housemates had taken the chairs by the fire, while a small group was on the floor playing Gobstones. A tall girl with chesnut brown hair and pale, almost silver eyes greeted Snape from one of the chairs.

"Severa, must you spend all your waking hours in the library? I feel as if we haven't seen you in ages." She idly rested on a young, broad-shouldered man with sandy hair. "Isn't that right, Cas?" He laughed. It was lazily elegant.

"Were you playing with your pet Mudblood, Snape? Copying your answers for tomorrows assignment then? I hope you are planning on sharing."

Snape scoffed. "What are you willing to give me in return Cassius? I can't keep doing your homework, or you're never going to learn anything." While she meant it in full maliciousness, Snape always wondered why men were amused by her acerbic nature. She had been horrified to find out from Honoria that many considered her barbs as some gesture adjacent to flirting, but assumed she was daft.

"Now Vera, is that any way to treat your friend? After all I have done to defend your virtue against those ghastly Gryffs, it would be cruel not to reciprocate. Wouldn't it Reg?" He gestured to a younger boy sitting nearby, his face buried in a book.

"Do not involve me in this Cassius," he replied tersely. Cas rolled his eyes.

"I can handle the Gryffs myself, thanks," Snape replied sourly.

"Could have fooled me."

With a grimace, she pulled out the assignment and shoved it in his hands.

"Take better care of this one, I don't want it back the morning of crumpled up and covered in beans." Cas gave her a mock salute and rolled up the parchment.

As Snape trudged up the stairs, Honoria followed behind. "Vera, have you given any thought to the Hogsmeade visit this week? Iknow you might have work you were planning on, but I was thinking we could make a day of it; you, me, Cassius, Reg, and the group. Maybe I could even ask Evan. I know it's a bit of a reach, but I think he might be convinced."

When they were in the safety of their room, she threw her bag on her bed and took off her shoes. "I'm not interested in Rosier, you know that. And I'm thinking of going with someone else."

Honoria frowned. "Oh, you really aren't going with that Evans girl are you? Vera, I think its sweet that you two have this Inter-House friendship, but you don't have to be so close to her. You're in a better crowd now, it's perfectly understandable to drift apart from your connections from your, well, unfortunate circumstances."

Snape hid her face, hoping she wasn't blushing. "It's not that. I don't think you would understand Honoria." She felt Honoria's pale hand on her shoulder.

"Well, I hope you will let me someday. But consider going with us. It will be fun. We can even hex a few firsties for old times sake. I'm sure you have some jinxes you'll want to try."

Snape gave her a ghost of a smile before opening her trunk and getting out her nightgown.

"I'll think about it. Goodnight H."


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera and Lily have a nice chat by the Lake. The Marauders show up. Vera wears a flower crown.

They were sitting outside by the lake. Lily looked beautiful, as always, with her disheveled grace as her wild auburn locks moved in the wind. Officially, they were studying for Charms, though Lily didn't need to, and Snape was enjoying spending time with Lily. Just looking at her was usually enough to brighten her day. Her heartbeat raced, she sweated profusely, and she felt unbearably happy. They had been talking for over an hour, catching up when they had reached a comfortable lull of silence.

"I'm at a loss as to what to do with Potter." Lily confided idly as she plucked a clover flower off the ground. She was making a crown.

"If he's not taking the hint, I can persuade him," Snape replied darkly. She had a few curses she had been meaning to try out, and if Potter was going to continue harassing Lily, she figured that she could get away with most of them. Maybe not the newest one. The countercurse was too much of a bother anyway.

"No, it's not that bad, honest." Her eyes pleaded to her in a quick flash of worry that made Snape uncomfortable. Did she really fancy him after all?

Lily coughed before forcing a grin. "Besides, I don't think I need to worry, with the amount of time he spends with Black, I'm beginning to wonder if I might just be a cover. Methinks the wizard doth protest too much, and all that."

Startled, Snape let out a snort.

"It makes sense, doesn't it? Those poor repressed toffs, unable to hide their unbridled passion for each other have to show off their bravado and I'm the lucky target."

"Oh come off it," Snape replies dismissively, "You're gorgeous, anyone would be genuinely fall for you."

"Which is why it's believable, but there's no need to worry about following through. I'll reject him for being a berk, and we go on with our lives. Why else would someone like him go for a muggleborn."

Snape felt anger, not at Potter, but at herself. Why indeed?

"Lily, it's not like you to doubt yourself, that's my thing." She did not seem reassured by that statement. "And it's not just your looks. You're terribly brilliant, as much as I hate to admit it you get better marks than me, and you're much too kind. You actually listen to people and you make them feel like they matter, even if they don't. And you get people. You know just what to say and you know how to get them to listen to you. Anyone would be mad not to love you." Snape was animated, almost manic. Quite the opposite of her usual closed-off self.

Lily frowned as she tied the final knot on her crown. "You make it sound like it's a bad thing."

Snape sighed. "It isn't, you're being obtuse. You shouldn't have to deal with anyone's judgement, you're better than all of them."

"Then why are you so ashamed to be seen with me," Lily asked quietly. "Why do you always have to have an excuse to see me?" Snape felt her stomach drop. She opened her mouth, but she really had nothing to say.

"Are we still on for Hogsmeade?"

"Of course, are you planning on cancelling?" Why must she always push and prod?

"No, of course not. And I'm not ashamed to be seen with you as you've so tactfully put it. I know it doesn't look like it, but I'm walking a tightrope. If I complete alienate my housemates, things could be bad for the both of us."

"I hope you know what you're doing, because I can't keep making excuses for you forever. Some of your housemates are going to become dark."

"Theres nothing inherently wrong with Dark Magic," Lily looked at her skeptically. "Yes, it can cause harm, but it also can be useful to maintain order to the system of magic as a whole. Everything has to be in balance, too much Light Magic in itself isn't beneficial either, it only makes the spellcaster weaker and complacent."

"Light Magic may be simpler, but there haven't been any studies to prove your argument. But even if Dark Magic makes you stronger, it's addictive and twists the user over time."

"That's what they say, but can that really be proven?" Snape added skeptically.

"Well, you tell me. There aren't any Grey Wizards, only Dark ones."

"Darkness is relative," quipped Snape. "And before you go on saying it's a slippery slope before I go dabbling in necromancy and blood sacrifices, the ancients didn't have a distinction between Light and Dark, it was blended into all aspects of magic. That's why some of the older potions we study have ingredients from dark creatures, some of the jinxes we study in Charms are allowed, and even some basic spells share wand movements with darker curses. A cutting curse is as dark as the caster intends it, same with a banishing charm."

"You're changing the subject." Lily blandly stated.

"So Potter and Black are secret lovers, is that the consensus?" Now that was changing the subject. Lily laughed.

"Nice, very subtle. While it's possible I honestly can't tell, the four of them are honestly very close, maybe they are just good friends."

"They have nicknames for each other."

"I call you Vera."

"And because you do, everyone thinks it's acceptable to call me Vera for some bloody reason," she snapped. She sat up and wrapped her arms around her legs. "And they're always skulking about around the castle. They certainly are hiding something, whatever it is."

"What do you think it is? A secret cult?"

"Seems a bit passé for them, but maybe. Either way, it would be nice to know. We could finally get some leverage over them."

Lily looks worried again. "Well, only if it comes to that. Maybe we should have a secret club of our own."

Snape groaned. "How juvenile."

"I think it would be fun!" Lily got up and placed the newly made crown of clover flowers on Snape's head, much to her dismay. She placed a second crown on her own head. "From henceforth I declare us as Daughters of…"

"Maeve?" Snape suggested.

"Oh, I like that. Daughters of Maeve. Arise, Sister. We are bonded not by blood but by each other," Lily stated in her silliest, most officious voice. Even after all these years, she really did like play acting. Despite herself, Snape grinned as they stood up, feeling a warm tingling as they held hands. Lily gave her a flourish of a curtsy and burst into laughter.

"You look silly," Snape responded.

"I think you look marvelous." Snape blushed causing Lily to laugh louder. "And as my Sister you have to be nicer to me."

"So there was an alternative motive after all." Lily wrapped her arms around Snape's shoulders and they stood close to each other, their foreheads touching, nose to nose. They stood there, breathing in each other's scent, Snape could feel the other girl's chest rise and fall and she couldn't help but be caught in her deep green eyes.

She could feel a brush against her lips, it was a quick peck, but it was electrifying and almost paralyzing. She stood still.

"I think sealing the initiation with a kiss seems fitting, don't you?" Lily giggled and placed a strand of Snape's hair behind her ear, allowing her to see more of her face.

"You know maybe we need to thank Potter," Lily mused casually.

"Thank me for what?" Of all the times, he always showed up when he wasn't needed. Potter, Black and Pettigrew had seemingly decided to also enjoy the unusually balmy autumn day after classes. Though it was far too much of a coincidence for them to just show up. Snape grabbed her wand from her robes, her fingers running over the handle, ready for a fight.

"Nice crown, Scervix." Black taunted. "Are you Queen of the Maypole? It's probably the most feminine item you've ever worn, fitting it's a crown of weeds." Snape drew her wand, but Lily held back her arm.

"Shove off, Black," shouted Lily. "What are you lot doing here?"

"We came to check on your safety, Lily. You weren't in the castle and it's almost time for dinner." James replied smoothly, with a mischievous glint in his eye. "Really Lily, as Prefect, you should be setting an example for the other students."Lily scowled, and checked her watch.

"I still have ten minutes left."

"Hardly enough time to get back to the castle. Of course, I'd be happy to escort you back." Potter smiled as he offered his arm chivalrously.

"I don't need you to do anything. Vera and I will head back together."

"How can we be sure you'll be safe with her?" Asked Black rhetorically. "She has been hexing other Gryffindors recently."

"Not to mention a few Hufflepuffs," chimed Pettigrew helpfully. Those Hufflepuffs had it coming to be honest.

"I'd trust Vera with my life," Lily stated firmly, causing Potter to chuckle.

"Then it will be a very short one." He retorted. "It doesn't seem that Vera has a trustworthy bone in her body." Oh that does it.

"Levicorpus!"

There was a flurry of panic as Potter was hoisted up into the air, kicking as his robes fell around his face. Black kept shouting at her to put him down and Pettigrew was trying to use any relevant charm to help, but he must have been using the levitation charm, since James was rising higher. Snape laughed, letting him squirm in embarrassment. Unfortunately, it seems that underwear was a Muggle invention, and they must be subjected to seeing his privates. Lily covered her eyes, Snape didn't bother. She wasn't very impressed.

With a flick of her wrist, she cancelled the spell and he flopped onto the ground.

"Rather poor dismount, could have stuck the landing better." Snape jeered. Potter hastily rose, smoothing out his robes and trying to his his embarrassment. He ran his hand through his hair and flared at her, eyes filled with hatred before calming himself.

"I'm terribly sorry you had to see that Lily." He apologized, but she looked away from him, smiling awkwardly. "I think we should head back."

Lily nodded. "Let's." They headed towards the castle together, Snape tried to sneak away until Black grabbed her arm. It appears he had followed her.

"That was clever," Black snarled. "But don't think just because you made up a spell doesn't mean it can't be used against you."

Snape glowered at him, remembering the spell that made you erupt bubbles out your mouth, the projectile vomiting curse, and the jinx that made you trip over your own shoelaces repeatedly.

"Then I'll have to create more spells." She replied coolly.

"You won't get away with this. You and your mates can't keep hurting people just because you feel like it."

"I could say the same for you." She replied.

"We don't hurt people, and we don't target Muggleborns. Which, seems kind of hypocritical from your end doesn't it? Your lady seems to be extremely forgiving, but I'm not. And I'm not going to go easy on you because you're a girl." Black responded as he let go of her.

"Good, because you're already at a disadvantage." Black grabbed her wrist tightly, causing her to wince.

"Is that so?" He replied idly, "I'm stronger, faster, and I can outduel you." In the moment he was talking, he would be distracted. Using that to her advantage, she grabbed her wand and cast a quick stinging hex on his hand, causing him to help and let go. She ran back to the castle, not bothering to see if Black was following her (He wasn't.)

Snape quietly walked into the Great Hall and sat across from Honoria and the other girls in her year, who were halfway finished with their meal.

"Where were you? You look like a mess." Honoria passed her a bowl of potatoes while Niobe Flint and Aoife Rosier whispered to themselves. Niobe must have said something rather vicious, Aoife was giggling like mad. Honoria frowned in disapproval.

"I like the crown, Severa. Is that a new fashion statement?" murmured Aoife, grinning with an ease that come from taking joy at others expense.

"Very Earth Mother," Niobe chimed in dramatically. "Very quaint. It suits you."

Snape scowled, and yanked the crown off her head, crumpling it in her hands and throwing it in the pocket of her robes. She applied a quick brushing charm to her hair, which was still a greasy mess, and straightened out her robes. Making sure not to slouch, she picked up her fork and casually began eating.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera and her friends go to Hogsmeade and meet a distinguished gentleman.

They probably would want revenge.

Snape brushed out her hair, but no matter what way she parted it, it wouldn't frame her face in a flattering way, only lying limp and scraggly. She had thought that growing out the length would help tame it, but she found she only had flyaways and tangles. To top it off, the extra grease was beginning to give her dandruff.

But, she was resourceful, she was intelligent, she could take all four of them on her own. She didn't need anyone.

"Really darling, we need to do something about your hair," Honoria frowned.

Snape scowled, "I've tried everything, potions, tonics, the lot. It just makes my hair greasier. Besides, it's not like anyone notices, it's just hair."

Honoria huffed. "Oh Severa, must you be so hopeless. While it is admirable you're cultivating the air of an aloof academic, it only really works if you have the looks to back it up, otherwise you come off rather ghastly." She sat next to Snape on her bed, which despite Snape's frequent protests on violation of privacy, went unheeded.

"I'm not cultivating anything, and I quite like being ghastly for your information." Snape pulled the hair out of her brush, and placed it in a burlap bag she would later bury in the Forbidden Forest. She was going to sneak out later to forage for potion ingredients, and burying hair in was the safest method of disposal. She didn't like the idea of the House Elves, or worse - other students, having access to her hair which could be used in anything from Polyjuice to Dark rituals.

"You really shouldn't bother, H," giggled Niobe. "Getting Severa to heed basic hygiene standards..."

"And a basic beauty regime!" Chimed in Aoife.

"Yes, that too. Is like teaching trolls ballet. I wouldn't try it, and it will most likely get you killed." Snape threw her brush at the girl.

"My aren't we touchy!" She laughed. "You know I mean well, Severa." (She didn't.) "I fully respect your rejection of societal norms, it must be very freeing not to have to care what others think of you."

"Oh it is," Snape grimaced. "Instead of spending two hours primping myself for a date only get stood up, I can use that time to sleep."

"I'll have you know Regulus fully intended on meeting us today, but he must get permission from my parents before he can consider courting me. Not like you'd know any of that, Halfblood." Niobe spat. He hasn't bothered telling her until breakfast, and by then she had kept the whole room up with her chatter.

"Ladies," Honoria stood between the two. Snape continued sitting, while Niobe was poised to attack. They stared at each other momentarily, assessing the next move.

"Right," Niobe gave a sharp nod. "We're going to be late." She clasped on her cloak and turned to Aoife. "Come along!"

They walked down to the village with the group. Snape hopes she could slip away halfway through the trek and catch up with Lily, but it seemed Honoria had a vested interest in keeping her close by. She linked arms with Snape, eyeing the village square.

"Cas says he's meeting up with us in front of Honeydukes. He, Rosier, and maybe a few others will head over to the Hogs Head."

"Are you sure you and Mulciber wouldn't want to head to Madam Puddifoot's?" Snape teased.

Honoria rolled her eyes. "It's not like that with me and Cas, I mean not yet. He's not spoken about a courtship."

"And if you don't make a move, how will he even know you'd want him to court you?"

"Because it doesn't work like that! I thought it was fairly clear by now. We can talk to him in the Common Room, in lecture, or mealtimes, or in a group. But I can't be alone with him, and I'm not going to risk everything for a boy. I'm not like Niobe, my reputation is all I have," She hissed.

"I'm aware of the rules. But you're a Slytherin, rules are meant to be broken as long as you're not caught."

"But there are always eyes watching." Honoria turned her head sideways and eyed both streets. "Oh, there they are! Hullo boys!" She waved at the rest of the group, smiling widely.

"Sorry we're late, we had a run-in with some nosy Gryffs." Mulciber bowed, and kissed Honoria's hand. "I hate to keep such a charming lady waiting in the cold."

Snape cleared her throat.

"And you too, Snape."

"Was it Potter and his gang?" Snape asked.

"As a matter of fact, it was. Seems like they know about the passage leading into town. They caught us by surprise when we were testing out some of those jinxes you taught us."

"I hope you were able to cast them silently."

"We were quick, they wouldn't be able to catch on that easily."

"Let's go," interrupted Rosier. "We're running late."

"I didn't think the Hogs Head took reservations," murmured Honoria.

"They don't." replied Regulus, startling everyone.

"I didn't think you were going to show up Reg." remarked Mulciber.

"Change of plans," he shrugged.

As they entered the Hogs Head, they were greeted by its usual sights. The smoke, the occasional goat wandering through, and the few drunks that called themselves regulars. The bartender was cleaning a filthy glass, but seemed unresponsive.

A tall young man waved them over, he had long, shoulder-length blond hair and a magnificent emerald green cloak, with an elegant set of grey dress robes underneath.

Mulciber lead the group over to sit as they tried to find space on the small table.

"I didn't think you would turn this into a social hour, Cassius. My time, unlike yours, is valuable and I do not need to waste it with schoolchildren."

"Oh come on Lucius, these people are my friends as well as yours, and I'm sure they will be quite useful."

Lucius eyed the two girls skeptically. "Pritchard, is it?" Honoria's eyes widened and she nodded.

"Your father is rather high up in the Ministry, but I hardly think you have any skills or talents."

"I have special permission to go home quite often, I'm sure I can stop by father's study while I'm there," she offered.

"While it is reassuring you are so willing to betray your family's trust to a stranger…"

"But, you're not a stranger Lucius. I know you, we've met at several parties."

"Well, this isn't a party. And I don't know what Cassius has told you, or what he's promised, I don't think we'll need the help of a pair of little girls. Have either of you even sat for your OWLS?" Both of them stated at their shoes.

"I thought so." Lucius sighed. "And Regulus, what are you doing here? I know for a fact you are much too young to even be in this establishment. Just, go. And take these two with you before you cause any trouble. I'll never hear the end of it from Cissy otherwise."

"But Cas and Evan are our age, why do they get to stay?" Snape asked, seething. How dare this man dismiss her so easily.

"And who are you exactly?" Lucius raised an eyebrow.

"This is Severa Snape," interjected Mulciber. "She's quite adept at coming up with new curses and jinxes, and she's brilliant at Potions. She is interested in all forms of magic, and an eager student."

"I've never heard the name 'Snape' before. Are you from the Continent?" Lucius asked derisively.

"No," Snape muttered. "I'm a Half-blood. My mother was a Prince."

"Tell me what you can do."

"I create spells, mostly for defense, but I also have developed some spells for melee that can instantly incapacitate while keeping the target alive, and some improvements to healing potions, much stronger than Essence of Dittany. I also just developed a charm that will heal scarring from several varieties of the Cutting Curse and the Blasting Curse."

Lucius raised his hand to stop her from talking.

"Well, I've seen enough. Thank you for this massive waste of time Cassius. This was a most productive use of my lunch break." He stood up, and reached for something in the pocket of his robes. It was a small, embossed price of paper. Printed on it was the name Lucius Malfoy, along with the address of the Ministry of Magic and his office number.

He handed the card to Snape. "I can get in contact with the others easily enough, but since you, well, run in different circles as it were to the rest of us, I suppose it is best we made a proper introduction. I am Lucius Malfoy, of the English branch of the Malfoy line." He bowed.

"I'm Snape, as you just heard. Severa." She added her given name as an afterthought.

"I suppose you aren't making your debut any time soon," Lucius sneered. "Keep this with you until you become of age, or at least after your OWLs. Even if you have potential you're still going to need an education."

Snape gingerly accepted the card, waiting to see if it would explode in her hands before tucking it into the pocket of her robes. Lucius motioned his hand to shoo them away.

"Well that was a wash," pouted Honoria. "I really thought we'd have an in." She was fumbling with the clasp of her good as they stepped out of the grimy pub. With any luck Snape could still make it in time to see Lily.

"You heard what he said, we're too young."

"Oh come off it, I'm older than Cas by a few months. They just don't see how we could be of use to them other than to produce heirs, or spares," she gestured to Regulus, who glowered.

"You were probably pushing your luck," he remarked snidely. "Not like either of you could add any value to the cause, unless they're in need of company."

"Because they certainly were going to ask a Fourth Year to join." Snape added, rage building at a second insult for the day.

"My place is guaranteed. And between you and me, they might need me sooner rather than later. I've been told that the Old Families are valued and appreciated there."

"Oh? By who? Your mad cousin?" Honoria jeered.

Regulus stopped walking, which caused the two girls to stop as well, Snape grabbed Honoria's arm to prevent her from colliding into her. He leaned close, making sure no one was nearby. They were at the edge of the Square, in a small alley adjacent to the Three Broomsticks.

"No, the Dark Lord told me himself," Regulus whispered.

Snape's eyes widened as she tried to contain her shock. "You've spoken to him?"

"Of course," Regulus have a self-satisfied smile. "He attended our Bonfire for Beltane this year and we were properly introduced." Snape wondered how the Dark Lord would act at a party. She couldn't fathom him enjoying a bonfire.

"I'm sure your brother must have made quite a scene." Honoria mused.

"He wasn't invited. Anyway, he had gone to stay with Potter for the Summer, so it was a non-issue." The two girls exchanged uneasy glances.

"Well Congratulations on once again getting what you want by the accident of birth," muttered Snape. "While this conversation has been charming, some of us have better things to do than stand around in the cold."

Regulus frowned, upset that his secret hadn't elicited the reaction he wanted. "Right then. H, would you like to head over to The Three Broomsticks? I'll buy you a Butterbeer."

Snape scowled. She was either going to have to walk in the opposite direction, turn around and enter the pub after them so they wouldn't see she was meeting Lily. She was already running late. Or…

"I'm heading over there myself, we can walk together." At least ruining Regulus's sad attempt at a date was worth any judgement he and H would send her way.

—-/—-/—-/—-/—-/

"There you are!" Lily jumped up from her table. "I thought you were going to be a no-show!"

"Sorry I'm late," Snape apologized, barely meeting her eyes.

Marlene McKinnon was sitting next to Lily, nursing a now cold half-empty tankard of Butterbeer. Her eyes narrowed and she nodded by way of a greeting. "Vera. Good to see you again."

Marlene wasn't exactly plain, but she was tall and very solidly built. She played on the Gryffindor Quidditch team as a Chaser, and the traits that made her an asset on the field made her rather unbearable off. One of those was her no-nonsense attitude, her stubbornness and her overprotective need to guard Lily like she was a quaffle.

Snape didn't bother acknowledging her and undid her cloak. "Are you still continuing your independent research on the properties of moonstone?"

If there was one thing she and Lily could connect over that no one else could (besides their unfortunate origins), it was Potions. As Marlene's eyes glazed over, Lily enthusiastically described how she was using her extra time out of Prefect duties to brew and how she was planning on creating a few tweaks to the Draught of Peace.

"I'm sure that would be helpful when we take our OWLS, it's going to be on there, and the examiners do give extra points for creativity."

"Just make sure you don't forget…"

"Syrup of hellebore, I know. And it was just that one time, Vera."

"But one mistake is enough." Snape massaged the bridge of her nose, thinking about the incident.

Lily laughed. "You don't have to tell me twice! It regulates the moonestone's mood elevating properties. Without it, the person imbibing the potion will turn into a giddy mess!" They remembered having to try each other's potions in class, and Snape had the misfortune of doubling over in convulsive giggles for a good two minutes. Black and Pettigrew never let her live that down.

"It's getting late," interjected Marlene. "We should start heading back to the castle."

"But Vera just got here!" Lily pouted.

"Then she should have been here earlier." Marlene gave Snape a pointed look of disapproval. "And isn't it your job to round up the Third Years anyway? There's a reason I'm not the Prefect, Lily."

Lily sighed dramatically. "Duty calls. I'll see you on Monday Vera. And you," She pointed at Marlene, "better save me some pudding if herding the little ones takes too long."

Marlene snorted. "No promises, but our thoughts are with you Oh fearless leader. Here's to surviving the Third Years and McGonagall." Lily shuddered.

"Hopefully Remus has started getting them to queue."

—/—-/—/—/—-/—-/

He hadn't.

Remus still spending time with his friends, as Snape found out on her walk back to the castle. It was dusk, and the shadows loomed over the ground. Winter was approaching, the sun was setting sooner.

Much to Snape's surprise, she felt her ankles lift above her head.

As she was yanked up from the ground by her own spell, she pulled out her wand and started to jinx the boys. She managed to send a Stinging hex to Black, hitting him in the head as he helped in pain, and sent an Disarming charm in Potter's direction, knocking his glasses off his face. As he had bent down to look for them, she sent a Knockback jinx in his direction. She cast a Bedazzling hex towards Pettigrew to temporarily blind him, and sent a Jelly-legs jinx to Lupin.

As the four tried to reorient themselves, Snape tried to undo the spell. Normally the caster would have to undo the jinx, but since she invented the spell, she knew the counterjinx

"Liberacorpus." She whispered, falling to a thud on her back. She groaned. It surprisingly hurt.

Potter shouted, "Now Vera, must you go so soon? We need to have a chat." She saw Black send another jinx, looked like Bodybind. She blocked it, but missed another from the other side by Lupin, who seemed to have recovered.

"It's impossible to talk to you, you seem to slip away every time we need to speak with you."

"Must be all the grease," quipped Black. They laughed. Snape tried to struggle, but she couldn't even wriggle. She still had yet to be able to silently cast the counter spell, but she would soon.

"It seems there's less grease, more dandruff these days," added Pettigrew.

"Good point! At this rate we should call you Snowy, since you're practically a snow globe at this point!" How did Black even know what a snow globe was?

Potter leaned over, watching as she lay supine, her eyes filled with rage. "I think you should apologize to me for the other day. We do have our differences, but you crossed the line." He undid the spell, and all of Snape's pent up aggressive wriggling unleashed as she tried to sit up, her body suddenly gaining sensation.

"And this isn't crossing a line?" She spat. "You certainly don't need to gang up on me with your lackeys." All four of them began to object before she cut them off.

"And as for the incident the other day, it's forgotten. No one else saw you, exposed, as it were and Lily certainly doesn't care one way or the other. And as for crossing a line, I'd say there is no line, this isn't a Wizard's Duel."

"I see." Potter frowned, his eyes steely. "'All's fair in love and war?' and such?"

She never had to pretend with him. Never had to hide her feelings. If anyone knew how she felt about Lily, he knew. It was almost as if they could understand there was a quiet war for her affections, one that involved slowly chipping away the other's credibility. Currently, Snape was winning. It has been an uphill battle. But any attempts to see past Potter's arrogance into his Gryffindor nobility had been quelled. While she might never have her feelings returned, she was satisfied knowing that Potter's weren't either.

"How do you think Lily would feel knowing she is putting her life in the hands of someone who is seen associating with known bigots who hate Muggleborns and all they stand for?"

Snape's face remained passive and stony. "I have no idea what you are talking about."

"Don't try to lie to me. I saw you at the Hog's Head, and I heard what you were talking about in the Square. You were unequivocally talking about joining You-Know-Who." She blanched. How could he have known? There was no one there.

"If you implicate me, you'd have to implicate Black's brother. You wouldn't try anything."

"Oh by all means, implicate away." Black said, idly looking at his wand. "It's no skin off my nose if Reg is expelled. He's made his choice."

"I could go tell Dumbledore, and you'd be expelled, you wouldn't be able to take your OWLS, and Lily would never speak to you again," Potter elaborated, savoring the thought. "You'd probably have to go to Muggle school and you'd hate it."

"What do you want?" She hissed. "You have no real proof, and you wouldn't be able to find anything."

"I'm sure if it was a choice between you and her, your friend Honoria would offer to be a witness."

She probably would. She swallowed.

"You didn't answer my question, Potter. What do you want from me?"

"Ah yes. We'll discuss that another time. I think Remus is running behind on his Prefect duties thanks to your jinx."

Snape brushed the dead grass off her robes, and as she was about to get up, Potter offered her a hand. She refused. "Blackmail seems out of character for you Gryffindors." She muttered.

"We're brave, not stupid. You Slytherins can't monopolize all the underhanded tactics." He replied.

She leaned over, her face inches from his. "I will make you regret this decision. I am not to be trifled with."

"Move away from me Snowy, I know I'm quite a catch, but I can't stand your breath!" Anyone nearby laughed, and Snape his her face in shame, quickening her pace back to the castle.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Has Vera become a prankster? No, she's just pulling off a break-in. Nothing unusual there.

There used to be a time when they would actively seek her out.

Instead, Snape was at her wits end, wondering when the Gryffindor idiots would claim their pound of flesh.

It's not that she wanted to see Potter gloating for his uncanny ability to be where he shouldn't, or Black wasting his potential on how to craft a cutting remark. She just wanted to get it over with. It's easier to tackle a threat if you know what to expect, and if anything their delight in tormenting her was predictable. Even Lupin, who liked to claim impartiality, really did enjoy seeing her squirm. Snape could see it in his eyes.

And Pettigrew almost wasn't worth mentioning. Was he there because they pitied him, or because they found some use for him. Snape only paid the faintest attention to him, which had been her undoing last week when she missed his hexes. He never really spoke other than to affirm the Potter and Black, as if they needed it. He was weak, and easy enough to take down on his own.

Snape found ways of leaving the clutches of her housemates fairly often, despite H's protests, and she was able to keep tabs on the boys. She had been able to figure out their schedules by memorizing Lily's, and picking up cues on any electives that might differ from hers. She had perfected the art of slinking through corridors undetected, a necessary skill for avoiding her father when he was on a bender, and was almost grateful for it as she followed the pudgy boy. Any time soon he would be returning from the kitchens on a late night outing, his arms full of treats undoubtedly to bring back to their Common Room. There was an alcove on the fourth floor that he would have to pass that was perfect to hide in. When he passes through, she would ambush Pettigrew and find out their plans.

Her wand ready, she waited as she heard footsteps. Today was Wednesday, so the Hufflepuff Prefects would have made their rounds on this floor an hour ago. As the footsteps grew louder, they didn't have the shuffling sound of Filch, or the scratching of Mrs. Norris. This must be Pettigrew. She sprung from the alcove and grabbed the boy by his shoulders, causing him to let out a squeal, dropping most of the snacks. She covered his mouth with her hand and cast a quick Silencing charm. Snape dragged him into the alcove, keeping her wand aimed at his throat.

"Listen carefully, because I'm growing impatient. I need you to tell them I want answers. If they're going to threaten me, they need to face me like men and give me their demands." The boy was shaking, Snape grinned.

She ran her wand down his neck to his chest. "Don't think about reaching for your wand, I'll disarm you and you won't be able to find it in the darkness."

Their eyes met and she could feel his anxiousness as sweat dripped down his forehead. Scanning his thoughts, her suspicions were confirmed, they were planning something, and she was going to be used as leverage. Leverage for what, she didn't know. It seems they hadn't informed Pettigrew yet. She looked away and sneered.

She could do anything to him if she wanted. It made her a little giddy, but she had to stay focused. Maybe one hex.

She cast the Twitchy Ears Hex and watched his face contort as his ears moved of their own accord. Maybe she'd try some of her new hexes, like the one that caused temporary spasms- not as severe as the Cruciatus, but more like a tingling similar to a full-body muscle cramp.

She undid the hex, just to make sure there was no interference and prepared to cast the charm before she saw a flash of light and felt her wand fly out of her hand.

"What do we have here? It looks like a bat skulking in the corridors," taunted Black.

"Worse. Looks like it's crusty old Scervix trying to have her way with Wormtail," quipped Potter.

Pettigrew ran out of the alcove as fast as his legs could carry him, hiding behind Black for protection. Potter grabbed Snape's arm, and in his other hand picked up her wand and placed it in his robes. Black handed Pettigrew's wand back to him.

"Not as fun when you're defenceless, is it?" asked Potter.

"I was trying to find out what you lot were planning. You can just threaten me and then think I'd forget about it," Snape spat. "How did you find us anyway?"

"You think you're very clever, sneaking around. But we've noticed you following us lately," Potter replied as he gripped her arm tightly.

"You're getting sloppy," Black added. "I honestly expected better from you Scervix, you're losing your touch."

Oh gods, she hated that nickname. It started when one of them noticed that the term for 'nape' in Latin was 'cervix,' and it certainly didn't help it also alluded crudely to genitalia. The name stuck ever since.

"I thought you came up with a new horrid nickname," she muttered.

"We were trying it out, doesn't have the same ring to it," laughed Black.

"So, out with it. I know you're planning something. And I know you're planning on blackmailing me," she hissed.

Black rolled his eyes. "It certainly isn't anything as sinister as that. Put your wand down, we want to talk."

"Like I believe you."

"Honest," agreed Potter, "Gryffindor's honor." She snorted.

"We need your help to infiltrate the boys' dorms." She stared at them. That was not what she expected.

"Couldn't you ask anyone else to do this? I'm not sure this is the best use of my talents."

Black snorted. "And what kind of talents are those? It's simple, you're a Snake, and last I checked, you're at a bit of a disadvantage here, luv."

Potter chimed in, "Plus, you'll be able to get into the boys' dorms and no one would suspect you. I mean, it's not like you're that popular with them."

"I think I'll pass," she spat.

"Fine," Potter interjected, "We'll go tell Dumbledore you were seen discussing recruitment to a suspicious organization."

"Also you we know you were the one who hexed those first years" added Pettigrew, causing Snape to jump. She had forgotten for a moment he was still there.

"Kind of apples and oranges, Pete." Potter replied.

"I'd probably get a detention at most even if he did believe you." Snape glared at them with a steely confidence that she hoped hid her uneasiness. The Headmaster had been fairly lax in terms of discipling potential recruits, but all Slytherins knew they were under strict observation because of the war and tensions were mounting as the war grew bloodier and more fervent. While it had yet to reach Hogwarts, many students had relatives who had been claimed, neighbors, or someone they knew killed by the Death Eaters.

Black sneered. "Ah, but I'm sure he'd listen to witness testimony. Your friend Pritchard would probably be willing to testify against you if it meant leniency for her. And the rest of the lot are Purebloods, they'll get a slap on the wrist. But you, Snape, will probably be made an example of since you'd be considered expendable. And then where would your friends be?"

She hated to admit it, but they were right. "So what do you want me to do?"

"Simple enough," Potter answered. "We'll give you items to place, ideally under the bed where it won't be detected. Are the trunks locked?"

"Each student usually customizes their own locks or curses to protect their possessions, if that's what you mean."

"No need to be pendantic, I was just asking a question. Well if you can't get them open you can just do that and be on your way."

Snape seethed. "I could get them open. It's practically child's play."

"You don't have to lie to make yourself look better." Potter cajoled.

"I'm not lying, and your attempt at trying to manipulate me to open their trunks is pathetic. I'll do it, but not because you made me. What do you need, and from which trunk?"

"Your friend Rosier has some letters wrapped in a paisley handkerchief. We'd like you to steal those." Potter placed his hand on her shoulder, she flinched. "It's not really for us, but we'd appreciate you helping our friend."

"And while you're at it, steal all their drawers." interjected Black. "Great way to cover your motive, and it'll be genius."

"What's in the letters?" asked Snape. The three of them shifted uncomfortably.

"It's not our place to tell you, but we overheard Rosier is planning on using them for something scummy, so we thought we'd ruin his fun."

Snape rubbed the bridge of her nose and sighed. "Ok. When am I doing this?"

"Tuesday, after the study period but before dinner. You'll duck out early and meet Remus here, he will bring what you need, and you'll plant the stuff. Then, you'll head to dinner for your alibi. It shouldn't take more than ten minutes." answered Potter.

"That's oddly optimistic of you."

"Well we wouldn't have asked you if we didn't think you could do it," he grinned, which only made her scowl deepen.

"Ok that's settled," added Black. "We best head back to the kitchens since you probably caused Wormtail to drop the treats."

"Why do you have these strange nicknames? You've been using them for the last year or so and its.."

"We have a deal then. Glad we could come to an arrangement, but as you can see we have places to be and mischief to make." Potter gave a mock salute and dragged his friends away, leaving Snape to contemplate her situation.

Tuesday crawled slower than Snape could imagine, and she spent many hours in bed thinking about what she'd have to do. It would be simple enough, she assumed. She had been breaking security charms in her mother's old school trunk for years before she went to Hogwarts, and she'd been practicing the ones she read in the old cursebreaking books in the library. Granted, they were mostly outdated, but she doubted her peers would have anything too advanced. Rosier was no slouch though, he might have a few curses on his trunk that might make it difficult to open.

She distanced herself from Honoria as the days went on. Granted, they weren't really that close to begin with, but she wondered how easily Honoria really would betray her if she was found out. She was a gossip, and Snape knew she would do anything to get in Niobe's good graces, or gain Mulciber's attention. It seems like Honoria hadn't noticed, and while it was a relief, it almost stung Snape's pride. She wondered if she ignored Lily for a few days if she'd miss her, or if she really was just staying friends with her out of pity like H.

She gripped her quill tightly as she half-heartedly finished her essay on the Imperturbable Charm, and ink pooled out the edge of the nib. She had mastered the charm years ago, and come up with a variation or her own, Muffliato. It was just something to do until 4:15. She checked her watch, another "gift" from her mother, and rolled up her essay. She started putting away her books and began to sneak out the door. Slughorn never monitored study hall, he usually shunted the job off the prefects, who gave the minimum level of attention.

"Where are you going?" Honoria whispered. "We still have another half-hour."

"Womens' troubles. I won't be long." Snape murmured. H nodded, and continued reading her Transfiguration textbook.

Snape looked over her shoulder and walked quickly to the alcove."

"You're late." A gangly sandy-haired boy emerged carrying a rucksack. It looked like he was going to fall over.

"I'm here now Lupin, there's no need to quibble about tardiness. Now what do I need to do?"

Lupin reached into the bag and pulled out a small red ball about the size of his palm. "Drop these under the bed." He placed it back in the bag and pulled out a blue ball about the same size. "And if you have time, place these in their sheets, or their slippers. The red ones are time sensitive and when they are taken out of the set they'll activate in twenty minutes. The blue ones will activate when touched. Do you have a pair of gloves?" She nodded.

"Oh good," he replied, slightly surprised. "So you're prepared then." Snape rolled her eyes. Did they think she was some sort of amateur?

Lupin handed her the bag and extended his hand. Wary, she gingerly shook it.

"Good luck, I'll keep an eye on you from outside the entrance. Oh and hold onto this." He handed her a snitch and she scoffed.

"Really? Is this some sort of joke?"

"Just take it. We charmed it so that if we need to warn you, the wings will flap and it will vibrate." She grabbed the snitch and placed it in the pocket of her robes.

"If I don't make it, I'm taking all of you down with me." Snape muttered.

"You can threaten me later," Lupin gently teased. "And you're welcome for the warning."

She glared and gave a rude gesture before putting a Featherweight Charm on the bag and placing it into her knapsack, which she had previously added an Extension Charm.

Quickly heading back to the dungeons, she now had twenty minutes to sneak into the boys' dorm, plant the...whatever these were, break into Rosier's trunk, steal the letters, and leave. No pressure.

As expected, the Common Room was empty, most students were at Study Hall. Snape glanced around to make sure no one was heading into the corridor for the boys' rooms. The dark shadows mingled with the dim green lights of the overhead lamps, making it difficult to see. The Fifth Year rooms were towards the end of the hall, so she had to hurry.

She slinked past each year's dorm, and as she was passing the Second Year rooms she could hear the door creak open. Quickly, she hid into the shadows on the other side of the hall and hunched down. The boy was in a hurry and slammed the door, seemingly oblivious to the fact someone was standing across from him. As she heard his footsteps retreat, she continued on her path.

The door only needed a quick Alohomora, and she was in. She had already put on her gloves and grabbed the rucksack, rolling the red enamel-looking balls under the beds. As they touched the floor, they briefly glowed before dimming. She stuffed the blue ones at the foot of the bed, hoping her classmate's sheets weren't too dirty and glad she was wearing gloves.

Her eyes scanned the room, landing on Rosier's trunk. She cast Alohomora, which didn't work. So Rosier wasn't an idiot.

She tapped the trunk with her wand to see if it had any touch-based curses. Nothing so far. That's good.

As soon as she thought it would be an easy job, the lock of the trunk started shooting out sharp pins. She covered herself with a Shield Charm, and vanished the pins in case they were poison tipped. She tried some other basic unlocking spells. She tried the stronger version of the spell, Alohomora Duo. Nothing. Liberare, didn't work. Dunamis, useless. Annihilare, nothing. This wouldn't be a clean job.

In frustration, she cast Portaberto and the lock splintered off the trunk and flung to the side. Snape bent down and quickly examined the contents. Nothing too exciting; books, clothes, a tuck box, shoes, but no letters. She picked up the books and flipped through them, but nothing fell out. It wasn't folded in the clothes either. She tapped on the sides of the trunk and cast Revelio in case there was a hidden compartment. Nothing. She pushed the trunk in frustration and was about to close it when she noticed that the tuck box was much lighter than she expected. If it was full of sweets, it wouldn't shift so easily.

It was unlocked, thank Circe, and it was a double layered box. The first layer was full of Chocolate Frog cards and a half-empty Bertie Botts carton, along with a packet of Marlboro cigarettes. Snape raised her eyebrows, and bummed one for herself for later. She popped the clasp and carefully opened the bottom layer, and saw the paisley handkerchief. It was of a shiny fabric, perhaps silk, and tied in a knot. She picked it up, making sure it wasn't cursed, and noticed there were a few letters inside. Not that many, maybe five? She placed them in her robes and reassembled the box.

Before she could place it back in the trunk, she felt the snitch buzzing in her pocket.

Snape swore, and dumped it back in the trunk. Haphazardly, she grabbed a handful of underwear and stuffed it in her school bag. She broke the locks on all the other trunks and started stuffing handfuls of underwear in her bag. If she hurried, she could probably make it.

Snape ran out the door and closed it shut, locking it for good measure. She adjusted her robes and walked towards the Common Room.

"What are you doing here?"

Snape stiffened and found herself face to face with Regulus Black, who had his wand in hand.

"Now Black, there's no need for dramatics," she answered coldly. "I'm just visiting."

"You're visiting the boys' dorms when no one is here?" Regulus asked rhetorically. "That's certainly not disconcerting."

"I wouldn't say no one is around. I might be visiting someone." Regulus gave her a look of disgust.

"Actually, the less I know the better. Go clean yourself up before dinner then, you look dreadful." Snape thought about wiping his memory. When whatever it was that the Marauders had planned happens, or when Rosier notices his trunk was opened, he would tell.

"Regulus, I'd appreciate your discretion." She asked demurely (at least she hoped it sounded so) "If anyone asks, I wasn't here." She batted her eyelids and pouted.

He glanced at her and frowned. "What's in it for me?" She could tell he was trying to pry into her mind and placed up her defences instinctively.

"What would you want?" She asked breathily, the way she saw in the trashy Muggle soaps her mother would watch. "I could...make it worth your while." She couldn't help but grin as he choked in horror.

"You have nothing I'd want!" He exclaimed. "Just go. Honestly, have some self-respect."

She cackled and she headed out of the dungeons. As she was heading out, she saw Rosier, Mulciber and a few of the other boys heading in. They seemed to be engaged in some discussion on Quidditch, so she snuck past them unnoticed.

"Took you long enough." She saw Lupin approach her as she headed up the stairs to the Great Hall. "Do you have any leftovers, or can I take the bag?"

She handed the empty rucksack. "Fat lot of good you were trying to warn me, I still ran into someone on the way out. But I did it, I used the lot."

Lupin grinned in anticipation. "Good. Can't wait to see how it turns out. Do you want me to tell you what they do or do you want to be surprised like everyone else?"

She wanted to be aloof and forget the subject entirely, but she was just the slightest bit curious. "Very well, tell me why we had to be so cloak and dagger about this."

"My word, I hadn't heard that phrase in a long time, I'd been beginning to miss those muggle colloquialisms." Snape blushed at her slip of the tongue.

They continued walking together, as Lupin explained their latest project.

"It's a variation on the Chinese Elemental Sphere."

"I'd heard about those, but I didn't think you could recreate them so small."

"Well, they aren't as powerful, and we added a charm to make the damage reversible after a few hours. Basically, the red ones are fire-based. They'll create temporary smoke bursts and sparks, and a have a charm to turn the fire into a dragon and chase anyone in its sight around the room."

"Like Fiendfyre?"

"What? No. The flames are harmless, they'll not even burn, just cause a bit of chaos. Where'd you learn about Fiendfyre?"

"What do the blue ones do?" Snape interrupted.

"Oh that's my personal favorite. They'll temporarily turn the enclosed area you've placed them in into a small body of water. If you put them in a bed, it will feel like you fell into the lake. Can you imagine their faces when they tuck in and find themselves drenched?"

"Would they drown?" Snape wondered.

"No, it'll only be a few inches deep, I'm guessing. But it'll reverse after an hour or so." Lupin replied. They stopped at the doorway to the Great Hall.

"And this is where we part ways. Thanks Vera, we couldn't have done it without you."

"Don't think just because I did something for you lot this one time I'll make a habit out of it." Snape muttered sulkily.

"Oh, and one more thing. Can you hand over the letters?"

Snape paused. She was hoping Lupin would forget and she could take a look at the contents. She took them out of her pocket and handed the four letters over, watching as he deftly hid them away in his own robes.

"Much obliged. Don't be a stranger Vera." He gave her a nod and headed over to the Gryffindor table.

She sat down with Honoria and chatted about the upcoming social season. Or rather, Honoria chatted, and Snape listened, glancing over at the side of the table where the boys sat. They seemed unaware of the chaos that would await when they returned from dinner. She noticed Regulus was eyeing her suspiciously, so she avoided his glance.

After they headed to the dungeons, Honoria and Niobe were continuing a discussion on whether or not Lisbeth Scintilla counted as literature. They were almost down the stairs when they heard screaming coming from the boys dorm.

"What could that be?" Snape asked with as much composure as she could muster.

"Whatever it is, it sounds like bloody murder." Niobe exclaimed. Honoria gave her a reproachful look before she too gasped at the sight of a dragon made of fire escaping from the corridor and romping through the Common Room. The older students who assumed it was something far more sinister than it was, fled the room screaming. The younger ones looked on in amazement as it scampered around, burning the rugs and tops of the chairs and doing twirls in the air before running into the fireplace and create a huge burst of flame. As soon as it had been engulfed by the fire, the flames receded to their normal state.

Suddenly, Slughorn ambled into the room, huffing with his wand out and ready.

"Where is it?" He wheezed. "Excuse me, I have to catch my breath. Where is the fire dragon?"

"It went into the fireplace," answered a First Year. "It was quite a show."

Slughorn examined the damage on the room, minimal but visible. He fixed it with a wave of his wand. "Yes, well it seems all in order and perhaps a bit overblown. I'm going to have to have a talk with some of you boys on exaggerating your hijinks! I'm all for a good story but you can't throw accusations of dark curses lightly. Now if you don't mind, I must get back. Your essays won't grade themselves you know! Ho ho!" Slughorn tried to remain jovial, but seemed mostly annoyed he was taken away from his evening sifter of brandy and his cyrstalized pineapple.

As the students dispersed, Snape and the rest of the girls headed to bed. Right when she was brushing her teeth, she had heard from Honoria that apparently she could hear splashing and more screaming coming from the boys dorms. Niobe scoffed.

"At this point, I bet they're just doing it for the attention."

Snape agreed.

Once the lights were closed, she waited until the rest of the girls had fallen asleep.

She silently cast Lumos and pulled out the last letter she had been able to hide.

She opened the letter, and poured over its contents.

My Dear Evan,

I have spent many hours counting the number of times I've thought about how much I love you. What you want me to do is wrong, but if doing the right thing means I will lose you, I can't bear it. I know I wasn't comfortable before about doing those things you wanted from me, but enclosed are the pictures you wanted, and in my next letter I will send those documents you wanted. Please write back to me, please come back.

Yours,

Joey Jenkins

Snape reread the letter and noticed there were some photos attached. She blushed when she saw they were boudoir shots, leaving very little to the imagination. While she never really interacted with Jenkins much, he was a year younger than them, he was well known around school as the Minister's son and a slightly decent Beater for Gryffindor.

Rosier must have let it slip he was going to blackmail Jenkins, and then Jenkins must have told Potter and his gang. But why? She wished she had the letters with the documents in them to know if there was anything incriminating in them, but even possessing these photos would be enough to potentially blackmail the Minister. Maybe not enough to oust her from office, but the Wizarding World was just as conservative when it came to homosexuality. They had the decency not to criminalize it, unlike the Muggles, but it was frowned upon.

She thought about Lily and wondered if she knew how she felt. She wondered if Lily would be disgusted with her if she knew.

Why was Rosier wanting to blackmail the Minister of Magic, and to what end? That was n easy enough answer, he probably wanted power and blackmail is the easiest method. And why was Potter so willing to help Jenkins? Gryffindor loyalty? It seemed unlikely. Having the ability to gloat about breaking into the Slytherin dorms to one-up them? Plausible, but they wouldn't be able to take the credit. A prank like this could result in suspension, or even expulsion. Why were they willing to help someone for no benefit of their own?

Snape would have to worry about that another time. She was resolved to give the letter to Jenkins in person. She had no use for blackmail, and as much as she hated to admit it, she was beginning to feel like the letter was a reminder of her own shame. The sooner it was out of her hands the better.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera and Lily have a fight.

All of Slytherin speculated for weeks how the incident, as it was so prosaically described in whispers between class. While most of the students suspected the Marauders, no one could guess how they were able to access the Slytherin dorms, and it was unnerving them.

Slughorn pretended the incident never happened, so he was a non-starter.

The older boys assumed it must have been an inside job, it was far too elegant for the Gryffindors and as far as they could tell there wasn't a motive.

"Not like they need a motive to cause trouble." Bartholomew Quince, one of the sixth years huffed.

The older students had taken to spending more time in the Common Room, keeping a watchful eye on the corridors in case there was another break-in. Niobe and Aoife had taken to sitting with the boys, which meant Honoria was also joining them. While Snape hated wasting her time socializing with the troglodytes, she might as well join them and keep a low profile. She brought a hefty book on Golems and Homunculi and skimmed through it as she listened to their theories.

"Do you think it's Quidditch motivated?" asked Terrence Burke, a seventh year. He was a Prefect, and he would at least have some pull in terms of catching the culprit.

"Doubt it," interrupted Max Pucey, the Slytherin captain. "While they could be trying to get us to lose our nerve before the match, it's not really their style. Also, their targets were all in the same year with only one member of the team targeted."

Paul Derrick, the fifth year Beater, grunted. "Whatever they had in mind, they didn't have to take our drawers. Pardon the subject matter, ladies. I had to owl my mum for some new ones but they still won't be here for another week!"

"I thought most wizards didn't wear underwear?" mused Aoife. She was sitting at the arm of the chair, wrapping her arm around her brother Evan, who pushed her away but tolerated her presence. Honoria was sitting next to Mulciber, who was sulking.

"Do they teach you underwear etiquette as well Rosier?" teased Quince before receiving a reproachful look from both of the Rosier twins.

"You've been in a bad mood lately, Evan." noted Burke. "What have you been up to?"

"Probably just hurt from having his pride wounded. Cassius hasn't spoken in days since the incident!" joked Pucey. Mulciber glowered and stood up.

"I think I'm going to turn in for the night." replied Mulciber moodily. "The conversation's gotten a bit dull."

"That sounds like a splendid idea." added Rosier while pushing off his sister.

"Make sure to bring some life vests to bed!" shouted Burke, causing the others in the group to laugh.

Snape idly flipped the page and allowed herself to drift into the background, barely noticed. That didn't last long before Honoria needed her to listen to her worry about why Mulciber was so dismissive of her recently.

"Do you think he's found someone else?" She whispered. "I mean, we hadn't gotten to the courtship stage but I had assumed."

"Has he said anything to you about the incident? Maybe he's still upset."

"Over missing underwear? I mean I'm sure the whole event was embarrassing but I think it's something else. Cassius told me he had something planned, something big, but he didn't elaborate on what."

"I think Evan had mentioned something as well," chimed Aoife. "But he's been mum about it since."

"Has Evan been spending time with anyone lately?" Snape asked. "Maybe someone from another House?"

"Why would you like to know?" Aoife asked peevishly. "You don't fancy him do you?"

Snape seethed. "Of course not. What about any friends? Any boys he's been close with?"

"As subtle as always, Severa." Honoria teased. "I think he's been tutoring some of the other students in Charms?"

"Oh I remember. I think one of them was the Minister's son." Snape remained impassive and waited for Aoife to continue. She did not.

Snape still has a knapsack full of underwear she had to dispose of. She would just vanish it away, but then she would have to get them out of her bag and she might be seen.

She decided if she had to she'd go into the forest and dispose of them, or give the to Moaning Myrtle. She might find some use for them.

If she wanted any answers, she was going to have to find Jenkins, alone, and somehow persuade him to talk. She had the last letter, and probably the most damning, which she assumed would give her enough leverage.

She had considered stalking Jenkins and ambushing him when the chance arrived, but time was of the essence. It seemed Rosier knew his letters were stolen, and Mulciber was also involved in the blackmail plot. Whatever they were planning in retaliation would not be pleasant.

Perhaps she'd send an owl.

I know your secret. I have the last item with me. Meet me at the Astronomy tower -alone- Saturday, 3 o'clock.

Of course she didn't sign it.

—

Saturday morning arrived, and Snape moodily dunked her toast in her coffee. She scratched her scalp, and dandruff floated down. The letter felt heavy in her pocket as she thought of what she would say when she met Jenkins.

"Any plans for today?" She looked up from her coffee to find Regulus standing over her. Stiffly, she placed her toast back on her plate and tried to casually complain about assignments.

"Like that's a problem for you. Move over." He motioned for her to shift and reluctantly she did.

As he sat down, he leaned over and whispered in her ear, grabbing her wrist. "I know it was you. What's your angle?"

"Unhand me or I will make you regret it." Snape hissed.

He released her but still was uncomfortably close, murmuring so no one could eavesdrop. "And now you're planning some sort of subterfuge. What is it? I want in."

"It's none of your business."

"I saw you at the Owlery last night before curfew. I doubt you were sending a letter to your dear old mum. So who was it? Some paramour? Or was it something to do with the incident. Why did you need the distraction, and why did you have to break into all of their trunks?" Regulus's eyes shined as he felt he was on the edge of a discovery.

"Why don't you tell me? You seem to have all the answers." Snape spat, causing him to scowl.

"Alright then, don't say. I'll find out soon enough. I would have been able to help you find out what Rosier's doing."

She was not going to ask how he knew, but Regulus must have assumed and smirked.

"Word gets around. Aoife thinks you're trying to put the moves on her brother, but we both know he's well off the market as it were."

"What are you expecting? Some sort of quid pro quo? I don't exactly trust you."

"You trusted me enough not to give away your alibi. I find trust to be a very powerful, but only if it's reciprocated."

"You're far too young to look so smug," She snapped.

"Is that a yes?"

She scowled. "It's not a no, not yet. I have some things I need to take care of today, but I'll keep you informed on a need to know basis."

Regulus nodded. He got up and left, nothing bothering to waste his time with pleasantries now that he had gotten what he wanted.

—

The time had finally arrived, Snape wrapped her threadbare cloak tightly around her thin body and shivered as the October winds swept through her. She had cast a warming charm, but she still felt the chill.

She wondered if Jenkins decided not to show up until she finally heard the heavy wooden door creak open.

Jenkins was a tall, broad-shouldered boy with blond hair and a wide face. He wasn't particularly handsome, and his uneasiness wasn't improving his looks. It wasn't until the door closed she noticed he wasn't alone.

"Potter. Of course you'd turn up," Snape said in annoyance.

"We has a deal, Scervix. You were supposed to give them all. What are you playing at?" Potter raised his wand, ready to cast. For once she didn't take up the offer.

"I'll give the letter. I just want to know what we're you going to give Rosier in return for the photos."

Jenkins pursed his lips and put his hands in his pockets.

"He wanted me to steal some Wizengamot files from Mum's desk. I know it was a stupid thing to do, I don't know what he wanted them for."

"How much does Potter know about the two of you?" She asked curiously.

"I know enough," Potter replied. "I know Joey is well, different."

Jenkins was staring intently at the view from the tower and fidgeting.

"But that doesn't change anything. He's a damn good Beater, and he's my friend. I'll not have you trying to ruin his reputation just because he trusted the wrong bloke. How much is Rosier paying you? I'll buy him out."

"No one is paying me, and I'm not here on his behalf. If anything the hypocrite deserves to suffer."

Jenkins and Potter exchanged a look of confusion.

Snape continued. "He used your love for him to his advantage, and he used you for his political gains. He has the gall to threaten to out you, and you still love him?"

Jenkins blinked. "You wouldn't understand what it's like. He was the first person who understood me. Now I don't think anyone can."

"I understand, more than you know. It's shameful, feeling these things. Knowing that the one you want might never want you back. But when you find some small hope, you will yourself to think it's possible."

"I just don't know why I thought it would be different. I guess I didn't think we could be more than what we were, you know just some fun, but he made me feel like maybe I wasn't wrong or immoral." Jenkins was losing his composure and was about to start sobbing any minute.

Snape handed him the letter. He gave her a hug and she squirmed. "I think that's enough. But now you know better. It's better not to give your heart at all if you don't know who to trust."

"I don't think The Warlock's Hairy Heart was something to aspire." James interrupted. He placed his hand on Jenkin's shoulder. "You'll find someone who genuinely cares for you, mate. Yes you were hurt but you can't just let go of love forever."

Snape ignored him. "It's all there, the letter and the pictures. Burn them." Jenkins nodded.

She turned to Potter. "I think we are even."

She left the two of them as she descended the stairs of the tower.

—-

It had been a while since she and Lily were able to spend a free moment together. Lily's Prefect duties seemed to keep her busy when she wasn't studying, and Lily had already set up a timetable for OWLS.

"Vera, we can't all coast by on our cleverness," she teased.

Yet Lily was always the one to initiate. Snape was letting their friendship whither. It was getting too painful to really spend time with her without feeling some sort of shame. Whether it was shame for associating with her and being caught by her peers, or shame for her growing romantic feelings, she couldn't tell.

Snape didn't say anything, but Lily noticed the silence for what it was.

"So, is it true? You and Rosier?"

"Which one?" Snape asked while cross-referencing her History of Magic essay on the Inferi Wars in the West Indies.

Lily blushed. "Evan, obviously. Why would there be anyone about the other one, you're a girl! There's some rumor going around you fancy him."

"I'd rather eat Doxy eggs than pursue him." Snape replied. She closed her book. "And I'm surprised I was relevant enough for the gossips."

"I think it's terrible that someone is spreading these lies about you. I knew you'd never date anyone like that slimy prat. I wish I knew who was spreading those lies, I'd give them a piece of my mind."

Lily's brows furrowed and she would fiddle with her hair, placing a curly strand of hair behind her ear. Snape frowned.

"I'd rather you didn't. I can fight my own battles." Snape replied in annoyance.

"But you don't know what they say about you behind your back. I've even heard some of your Slytherin friends say some cruel things about you when I was in the library." Lily pleaded.

"I know, I was there."

"Then why do you let them?" Lily asked.

"Your friends disapprove of me, what's the difference?"

"That's different." Lily responded, "And at least they don't look at me like I'm Hippogriff dung when I'm in their presence."

Snape didn't say anything.

""You don't need them. We only have a few more years, and we can forget them. And I know I've been busy, but I'll make more time." Lily looked like she had been meaning to say this for a while, but it was only increasing Snape's irritation.

"What you're saying is, that you think you're enough," Snape replied, "Sometimes I don't know if you're hopelessly naive, or willfully ignorant." She internally chastised herself. She would never say something like this to Lily before.

"You think I'm being willfully ignorant? What about your noted bigot friends, and don't interrupt me please Vera, who not only single out Muggleborns and taunt them, but also have resorted to attacks. Did you know about that creepy spell one of your friends pulled on Mary Macdonald? She's been getting night terrors because of it. And I'm still defending you to them."

She did remember that. Mulciber had boasted how he'd finally perfected the Imperius Curse. He hadn't mentioned how exactly, but the other boys certainly shared some knowing looks.

Lily continued, "But what hurts me the most is that you don't do the same for me. You care more about your social standing to a bunk of posh self-absorbed cretins who don't respect you than you do about your true friends. And Vera if that's true, does that mean you really even respect me?"

"Of course I do. But it's complicated. You don't have to bloody live with them." Snape responded.

"But compromise doesn't mean giving everything. By not saying anything, you are tacitly agreeing to their ideas. You think that Pureblood supremacy is right, and that it is ok to hurt others for something they can't control. Do you think that wizards should be judged by their birth?"

"Well, blood status is important. Not just socially, but culturally. The Wizarding World has had to compromise to accommodate Muggleborns and we have lost many traditions from the past. Especially with the aftermath of the last war, swaths of traditions have been lost, knowledge outlawed because it was considered too Dark or too dangerous. And maybe they're right about Muggles. If there were less people in the world like my Dad I wouldn't mind."

"But not all Muggles are like your father, what about my parents? Tuney?" While Mr. and Mrs Evans had always been accommodating and tolerant of her presence, she would never say they had been entirely genuine. It was mostly to humor their daughter, and it looked good to the neighbors that they had been so charitable. And the less said about Petunia, the better. There was really no love lost there.

Snape ignored her attempt at reason. "But Lily, you're a witch, you aren't like them. If you have the power to control others, why not use it? Why do we have to hide when they can bow down to us?"

"But according to the Purebloods, I'm not one of you either. Did you hear what they say in the Wireless? Some of them think Muggle Borns have 'stolen' their magic from Squibs!"

"That's an old wives tale." Snape muttered.

"But they want to believe it. And how exactly do you want the Muggles to bow to us? Ask them nicely? I'm used to be worried for you Vera, but when you speak like this you scare me. And I don't know if I can handle this anymore."

"So you're just going to drop me then? After everything? I introduced you to this world." Snape gathered her books and stood up. "You really can be so self-righteous sometimes, just because you jumped into this world you can fix it and you can fix people. But you can't. Magic isn't some project, and neither are the people who use it. You think I'm scary for wanting to control them? Well what do you think you're doing trying to change me?"

"I'm not trying to control you. You just liked it when I was young, and I was ignorant. You liked having someone you could teach about this world and listen to your opinions because you were my only reference! When I got older and I had my own thoughts, you ignored them, or you brushed them off as silly because I supposedly didn't know better. And even before all this supremacy nonsense you resented me having other friends."

"That's not true!" Snape hissed. It was.

"Let me finish!" Lily raised her voice.

It was at this point Madam Pince had finally had enough and banished them from the library, slamming the door in their faces.

Snape looked Lily in the eye and tried to find what she was thinking. She was still angry, but also hurt. It devastated her, but she was still too furious about the argument, and feeling satisfied in her anger.

"Right, well I think we should cool off for a bit and then we can resume next week?" suggested Snape.

"No," replied Lily as she tried to respond calmly, "I think this was a breaking point. Haven't you noticed we just argue whenever we see each other?"

"You argue with Potter all the time." Snape replied weakly.

"But you're my friend. Or you should be. I don't know, Vera. I think we really do need to take a break. It's just exhausting." Lily adjusted her schoolbag and nodded as a form of half-hearted farewell. But she didn't move.

Snape was stunned, and she could feel her eyes sting. "Fine," she sniffed. "I don't need you. Don't ever talk to me again." She ran away before Lily could see her burst into tears.

It wasn't until she had reached the Slytherin dorms that she felt she had made a terrible mistake.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera hexes a Third Year and starts an illegal Potions business

Snape didn't want to get out of bed if she could help it. It felt like the world had crashed around her and she just wanted to hide away.

Of course, she had class so that wasn't possible.

She decided to skip breakfast and head straight to Charms. Thankfully, it was with the Ravenclaws, so there was no need to worry about how she was going to face Lily. Honestly, she didn't know how she would manage tomorrow.

The more she thought about it, the angrier she became. How could Lily do this to her? Didn't she know how she had tried? How often she had to defend her friendship with a Mudblood, and how little her peers respected her for it? (Well, maybe she didn't try hard enough.) It was better to feel anger than sadness, it wouldn't do to be so weak.

She scuffled into the back and basically went through the motions of her day. She'd already mastered the Summoning Charm, so she discretely was writing in the margins of her textbooks. Maybe there was a way to improve it? Increase its range, or improve the wand movements? How could this spell be used in defense?

Her mind wandered to a few hexes she had been working on, and hypothesized some of the potential effects. If only she had some test subjects, but that got her in this mess in the first place.

Well, she could always pick a fight with the Gryffindor boys. She needed someone to take her rage out on.

What would be the best place to strike?

Well it was currently noon. So while it would be dramatic to strike during lunch, it would also be madness. She needed to find them either before afternoon classes, or right afterwards. And they would have to be alone.

Well, the Gryffindors had Transfiguration with the Hufflepuffs, so they would be finished sometime around three o'clock. If she could cut them off on their way to Gryffindor Tower, maybe somewhere on the fourth floor? That could work.

As she sat down for lunch, she poured herself some pumpkin juice, and grabbed an apple. The sooner she was out the better.

"Well, I think it's high time you kept me up to date on your 'secret mission". Snape eyed the young man sliding next to her. Oh right. She had made up that lie about getting Regulus involved.

"Oh it's nothing you'd care about," she responded brusquely. "I was forced into helping settle a score. It's finished, that's all you need to know."

Regulus pouted. "And here I was going to tell you what I'd learned about Rosier." He looked up, making sure the older boys were preoccupied. They were on the other end of the table, making some sort of tower out of mashed potatoes and peas.

"Your information is of no use to me," Snape drawled, "Anyway, I already know."

Regulus's eyes widened. "Really? And what are you going to do with that?"

"Nothing. I don't think it's any of our business, do you?" Snape put down the slice of her browning apple. She wasn't very hungry anyway.

"Do you want to know what he was going to do with the letters?" Regulus asked, looking pleased with himself.

"No, and I think if we want to keep our heads we should probably stop talking about this." Shape hissed.

Regulus sighed. "Very well. But next time you are settling scores, as it were, let me know. It's been terribly boring as of late."

Snape scowled. "Is my life some sort of diversion for you?"

"Yes," he smirked. "And don't look so cross, it's very unbecoming on a woman."

Snape got up and decided she wasn't going to bother with waiting. Maybe she'll ambush them before class. It's not like she had to worry about upsetting Lily anymore. Not like she cared if Lily was upset, no she did not.

The best way to get their attention was to target one of the younger students, especially one of the Gryffindors.

It was almost time for class, and most of the students were walking to and from their respective dormitories to their destinations. She was at the second floor, at the foot of the staircase that would often swivel to Gryffindor tower. This was the halfway point for most students to separate. She knew the Marauders would arrive to class last, so they will certainly pass by. All she needed now was a straggler.

She didn't have to wait long before she saw a Third Year waddling towards the staircase. He was small, with frizzy blond hair and a rather hurried pace. He was running late after all.

Snape sent a quick insect jinx, causing the boy to scream, sprout feelers and start scuttling along the ground. While the boy wriggled and tried to make a sound (but failed) while his antennae started examining the floor, Snape laughed. This certainly was an improvement to moping around.

She felt a Stinging Hex straight to her back and a Disarming Charm strike her hand, knocking out her wand. Finally.

She picked up her wand, careful to miss another spell, and turned around.

While Black looked ready to duel, Lupin was helping the boy on the ground, Pettigrew looked tense, but also had his wand out, and Potter looked annoyed.

"Still up to you old ways, aren't you Scervix?" taunted Black. "And here we were thinking you were going to change."

"We don't ever need to speak of that again." She murmured. She sent another hex, Potter used a Sheild Charm and blocked it.

"You have terrible timing, Snape." Potter responded. "If we're tardy for Sprout, she'll give us detention again and if I have to prune the Snargaluff tree, I'm personally going to feed you to it."

"I'd like to see you try." She sent some more hexes, a few of her own invention, hoping they'd be caught off-guard and one would slip through. It seems they were adept at blocking, even Pettigrew much to her dismay. Lupin had escorted the boy back to the stairwell and shot a hex from behind. She ducked, and it hit Black.

"Merlin!" He gasped as leeks started to grow from his ears.

"Looks like you have a reason to be excused from class." Snape jeered. "Or you can take him to Herbology and see if he can be turned into a nice soup."

Potter sent a Knee-Reversing Jinx in her direction, causing her to fall over, and Black sent a spell that turned her nose into an elephant's trunk. She trumpeted in anger, realizing she wouldn't be able to verbally cast spells.

She rolled on the floor, trumpeting.

"Well, she's going to cause a scene." Pettigrew remarked. "I guess we better change her back?"

"I say we leave her here. Serves her right. She started it, and we have no obligation to help her." Black responded as he rubbed his now plant-like ears. "Anyway, I have to head to the Hospital Wing."

"We can't do that, Padfoot." Lupin mumbled. "Even if we want to. Change back the tunk at least, then we'll head out."

Black nodded, and gave the counterjinx. "I think it suited her better honestly. For once she had a nose bigger than her current one."

He turned to Potter.

"What'd you say we keep the backwards knees? I mean she did make Evans cry."

Was that true? Or was he just trying to get in her head.

"I don't know what you're trying to pull but it's not going to work. Lily doesn't cry." Snape responded bitterly. "Do what you'd like, see if I care."

"You really did hurt her, Snape." Potter said solemnly. "I've never seen her so upset. And you know, all these years we really were holding back because Lily told us to go easy on you. You were just misunderstood." He walked over to her, watching her writhe on the floor as she tried to lift herself up. He placed his foot on her leg, gently holding her in place, his wand pointed at her.

She stopped moving, her eyes met his and she could see anger, but also something else she couldn't quite place.

"But I think we know better. You aren't misunderstood, you're just a bitch." She flinched as he raised his wand, and undid the jinx. He offered her a hand and helped lift her up before walking away to help Black to the Hospital Wing. As the four of them walked away. Snape huffed.

Snape was in a terrible mood the rest of the day, and the following day.

When she was in a terrible mood, she brewed.

Brewing wasn't really a passion of hers, it was mostly a way to pass the time. Some girls had needlework, others had gardening, Severa Snape liked brewing potions. It cleared her head of most of the dark thoughts that crept in when she was idle. More importantly, she liked experimenting. Thinking up new combinations, new techniques, it was like solving a puzzle without any of the answers. And if it failed (which happened more than she'd like to admit), it was still useful to know what didn't work.

She was waiting for her batch of a Blood Clotting potion that would help speed up injuries and maybe diminish larger cuts. She had moderate success with the first batch, but she was going to see how far she could enhance the potency before it led to a full-on stroke.

As she noted the new ingredients: Yarrow, Yak milk, and Blue Chard, she made of comment in the back of her Runes textbook how each addition affected the current solution.

She sighed. Lily used to give her feedback on some of her potions. It used to be fun bouncing off ideas with her, sometimes Lily would even join her and she'd convince Slughorn to let them use extra ingredients from the storeroom. She really did have that man wrapped around her finger. Snape had to buy or forage her own ingredients, and was lucky if he even let her use the classroom during off hours.

She was waiting for the solution to finish simmering, and was about to start cleaning up when she saw someone enter the room. It was odd, no one ever came in here.

Much to her surprise it was Mulciber. Snape tensed up, wondering if he had finally caught on to her involvement in the prank at the boys' dorm.

He walked up to the cauldron with a careless ease and peered over. "What've you got in there," he joked. "Love potions?"

"It's for Blood Clotting." Snape replied flatly, hoping he would take the hint from the irritation in her voice. He did not.

"For healing? Sounds useful. I'd like a vial of that when it's finished." He peered over at the potion and she shooed him away.

"It's not going to be cheap." She replied tersely.

"Not even a discount for friends, Severa? After all the times I've helped you?" Mulciber leaned against the table and looked over at her notes. She slammed the book in his face.

"Ingredients cost money Cassius, which is something I have very little of as you know."

"But you do have access to brew practically unfettered, Slughorn must really have taken a shine to you."

"I only was allowed in here because of Evans," Snape remarked casually.

"Ah yes, the Mudblood." Mulciber drawled. "Don't do yourself a disservice Severa, you're also quite talented and from what I've heard, you've come to your senses and cut ties with her Is that correct?"

"How'd you know?" Snape asked.

"H told me that girl hasn't been hanging around you anymore. Good riddance, I say."

"Is it a pastime of yours to gossip? Or are you and H finally setting a date?" Snape rebutted.

Mulciber laughed. "It's a good thing I like you Severa, or else I wouldn't be so forgiving. How about this, I pay you ahead of time for ingredients, and you make what I need. Sounds good?"

If anyone knew she was starting a potions business, she would not only lose her privileges to brew, she'd be committing a crime by Ministry regulations and would probably be expelled.

"I don't think it's worth the risk Cas." Snape responded. Mulciber smirked.

"Very well. I'll pay cost of ingredients plus 30% commission. And I'll keep Old Sluggy busy if you're worried about getting caught."

"Make it 50."

"40 and no more."

Snape frowned, but shook on the agreement.

And so she started her illegal brewing business for the students of her year, or at least Mulciber, and sometimes Rosier. She wasn't aware if she had other customers, but the batch sizes Mulciber wanted were for twenty people at least. One of them would give her a list and a bag of gold, and she'd drop of the potions. They wouldn't meet in the brewing room or in the Common Room, it would be too obvious. Instead, they would meet at the statue of the Humpback Witch on the third floor.

It wasn't anything out of the ordinary at first. Calming Draughts, Pepperup Potions, Memory Potions, Dreamless Sleep. Then came the more bizarre suggestions: Blood Replenishing Potions, Burn-Healing Paste, Essence of Dittany. Snape wasn't going to question, but she didn't like knowing these weren't intended for schoolwork.

It wasn't until she had gotten the most recent list that she had to pause. Lacewing flies, Leeches, Boomslang skin, Knotgrass, Fluxweed.

She looked at Mulciber skeptically.

"I think I can expect your discretion." He growled.

"I won't be able to go into the shop and buy Boomslang skin you know. It's a controlled substance."

"Just pinch it from Slughorn's stores." Mulciber replied testily.

"You know I can't do that, he'll know. And I can't bribe him."

"I'm sure you're resourceful, you'll think of something." Mulciber threatened. He left her to consider her options.

While it would be easy enough to steal the skin, she knew Slughorn wasn't an idiot. He might be pompus and at times care more for his own social standing over his student's welfare, but she wasn't going to steal anything when she had access to the potions classroom. She'd be the prime suspect. She'd need an alibi.

"So you need me to cover for you, again?" asked Regulus skeptically. She had asked Regulus to meet her in the library, it was relatively neutral and less likely to arouse suspicion in anyone if they were studying together. Though Merlin knows why the Black scion would be spending any time with a plain nobody such as Severa Snape.

"Not just cover for me, we need to be able to prove I'm somewhere, when I'm going to be in another place entirely, preferably when everyone else is busy."

"Well we could place an illusion on a dummy and cart it into dinner in your place." Regulus suggested.

"No, it's too obvious. Besides, Dumbledore might see through it," She replied.

"You could try after hours, when everyone is in bed?"

"Worse idea. He'll definitely be in his office grading by then."

"So you're stealing something again," Regulus responded triumphantly. "I knew it!"

"You couldn't have, I never said what I'm doing." Snape grumbled.

"Well you weren't going to sneak by Flitwick, and the only other male professors are Slughorn and Professor Darger. And I'm not sure what you'd need from the DADA professor other than trying to pilfer a grindylow."

"I have no use for a grindylow," Snape acquiesced.

"May I ask what you're stealing? It's only fair after all."

"Let's just say that if I had it now, I wouldn't be in this situation," Snape said wryly, but frowned when she realized Regulus didn't understand her meaning.

He changed the subject. "So that leaves us the Halloween concert. It's mandatory, everyone will be there. We just have to have someone take your place."

Snape shuddered thinking about the dull choral event that took place before the annual Feast, and how even the enlarged toads looked like they would rather be pickled than participate.

"But that's tomorrow," Snape paled. "I won't have time to create a proper diversion."

"Well what's your current plan?" he asked.

"I've been trying out this spell I found in the Restricted Section, the Vladislav Enchantment. If we can transfigure a life-like organic husk that looks like me, it can exhibit my essence for a short period of time. But I might need to iron out the details." Snape explained.

Regulus looked at her quizzically. "That is some extremely Dark magic. I think we should hold off on that idea for now. Also what does 'ironing out' mean exactly?"

Snape huffed in frustration. "I suppose you have a better idea?"

"I think I do," He got up and hastily started stuffing his things in his bag. "But if I don't return, assume the worst has happened to me." Regulus quickly left without much of an explanation.

It wasn't until later the next day she heard from Regulus. She had been busy gathering up any sort of organic material in her bag, particularly scraps of meat, in case she needed to build a facsimile of a body.

"Throw that away, the last thing you need is that delightful perfume of rotting food to add to your delightful appearance."

He sat next to her, and was uncomfortably close.

"What's wrong with my appearance exactly?" She asked with pursed lips.

"I think we can save ourselves the time and skip this potential minefield don't you? I have our answer," he replied conspiratorially. Leaning in, he pulled out a golden necklace from his robes. It had a small golden hourglass on its pendant.

"It can't be." Snape whispered.

Regulus placed it around her neck, and she hid it in her robes. "You'll turn it once for each hour you want to go back. Travel too far back, you'll die and existence will unravel, so no pressure."

"How did you get his?" She asked, too stunned to really process the incredible and highly restricted object that was possible obtained through dubious means.

"Jemima Trowler is currently taking ten OWL classes. That's almost impossible."

"So this is Jemima's?" Snape deduced.

"It still is. However, Jemima is currently indisposed due to an incident with her broom. Completely shattered her leg in three places and will have to spend the night in the infirmary. She won't be in a state to notice its absence, as you can see."

"I see. Was this to help me, or hurt one of Gryffindor's Chasers?" Snape asked.

"Well anything to put my brother in a bad mood is a win in my opinion. But this is exactly what you needed, and it took a great deal of effort to get." Regulus complained.

"My hero," she snapped. "Should I grovel?"

Regulus continued. "Just watch the concert, and we'll meet up after the Feast in the dungeons. You use the time turner, go back two hours to the beginning of the concert, and do what you need to do."

"I figured that much out myself, thanks." She paused. "But really, thank you."

"I expect you're going to be paid handsomely for whatever it is you're getting, I expect half the take."

"You don't need the money," Snape grumbled.

"But you do, so it makes the reward more valuable to me. When we meet up at the dungeons you'll hand it to me and I'll sneak it back into Jemima's bag by morning."

Snape nodded, and felt the weight of time turner hanging around her neck like a rock.

"Are you alright, Severa? You've been rather listless these past few weeks." Honoria pouted.

They were sitting together at the concert. H would make a perfect alibi, and pretending to listen to her would give Snape a chance to scope the room. Sitting in the front, she could see Mulciber and Rosier in the back, muttering secretively to themselves. The other boys in her year seemed to be passing notes to each other. The girls were whispering, gossiping as always.

On the Hufflepuff table, students were eagerly listening, as most of the students in choir were their housemates. The Ravenclaws were bored, but you could tell they had politely decided to silently allow their minds to wander. The Gryffindors were overdoing it, as always. She sighed as the boys were ironically applauding this trainwreck of a concert and shouting for an encore. Her gaze lingered too long at Lily, and much to her embarrasement, Lily looked back. They shared a moment of remorse, and Snape felt like those green eyes were boring into her very being. She wanted to scream. Suddenly, Lily looked away and Snape stared at the floor.

As the concert dragged on, she kept looking at Lily, hoping they would share another moment, but she seemed to purposely be looking straight at the performers, unwilling to take her gaze off them. Snape closed her eyes as tears brimmed along the sides and sniffed.

"I say, Severa, you look unwell," whispered Honoria. "No one would mind if you ducked out a bit early."

"No, I'm fine." Snape wiped her face. "Just allergies."

After the Halloween Feast was over she headed to the designated spot. Regulus had yet to show, and she was behind schedule. Taking a deep breath, she was going to have to do this alone.

She twisted the hourglass and felt the room spin.

When she regained her bearings, she knew she was in the same place, but the light was different. She checked her watch, and yes, she had done it.

She didn't have time to marvel before she heard someone walking by. Thinking fast, she hid behind a suit of armor.

Much to her surprise, it was Slughorn, walking with a student.

"I say, my boy, I think with your marks and your brains you could go anywhere for your Mastery! It certainly helps that I'm well acquainted with Jonas Redfurn, head of the Oslo Potioneering Institute, he was a pupil of mine and a marvelous student, in fact he sends me a bottle of aquavit every year! I'm sure a generous donation from your father would certainly help…"

As they passed, Snape couldn't help but scoff. It seems that skill had little to do with gaining a Potions Mastery and it had more to do with connections, like everything else.

When the there was no other possible interlopers, she reached the door and unlocked it, quietly closing it behind her and locking it from the inside.

The store room had a standard locking spell, nothing too flashy. Perhaps Slughorn was too confident in his abilities to protect his ingredients. She went into storage room and searched the shelves. She grabbed the Boomslang skin, the lacewing flies, the bicorn horn and the knotgrass and placed it in her bag.

Snape closed the storeroom and locked it, making sure to use the same spell. She locked the door to the classroom, and quietly snuck out to her room to hide the skin in her trunk.

She sighed. How was she going to brew this? It was going to take a month at least. And she certainly couldn't brew this in the classroom.

Well, she would just have to find somewhere. She knew of a few abandoned rooms in the dungeons, secret antechambers. While it wouldn't be ideal, it's better than nothing.

She waited in her room and did some reading until the Feast was over. She headed to the meeting spot to find Regulus, but it seems her luck was running out.

"I didn't think you'd be back from the Feast so soon!" Rosier flagged her down in the Common Room. Students were beginning to trickle in and it was too public a space to act suspicious, but she was running out of time.

"I was feeling unwell," she pursed her lips. "If you excuse me, I think I forgot something at the Feast and I have to retrieve it before curfew."

Rosier grabbed her arm. "What's this people have been saying about you and me? That we're an item?"

"Excuse me?" Snape hissed.

"You heard me. Have you been spreading lies, you slag?" he whispered. For some reason, there were so many students walking around, heading to their rooms, none of them seemed to notice anything was wrong. Rosier smiled at her, as if they were having a friendly conversation.

"You might think you're clever trying to tie your name with mine," he added, "but I'd never even look at you, and I certainly wouldn't shag you." Rosier gripped his arm tighter around her, making her unable to pull away.

She quickly grabbed her wand and pointed it on his chest. "You aren't as important as you think you are Evan. Unhand me or I will personally make sure you're unable to shag anyone, as it were."

Rosier grinned, whispering in her ear. "Well it doesn't matter if you spread those rumors or not, at the end of the day you're still an ugly half-blood. You've been useful these past few weeks, but we've been giving you a sizable sum for little return. We are going to need what we want in perfect condition, or you will pay, and I will enjoy seeing you brought down."

Rosier let go of her, pushing her to the ground. Snape stood up, straightened her robes and headed out.

"What took you so long?" asked Regulus. "I was worried you wouldn't show, and we'd be in deep trouble."

"Never you mind. Here's the time turner, just get it back. I certainly am glad to be rid of it." She handed it over to him and he nodded, placing it back in his robes and stealthily departing up the stairs to return it to its rightful owner.

Snape sighed, and headed to the antechamber she had decided on for her brewing station.

It was also in the dungeons, and it was a medieval relic from when the castle stored its own food during sieges. It was musty, and had a perpetual white dust on the floor, but it would do.

She set up a station, enchanting some of the loose stones into a work bench and a stove. She was going to have to get an extra cauldron and some more glassware to pickle the flies.

She was going to need candles, there was no natural light after all, and a calendar.

More importantly, she was going to have to find where she could harvest fluxweed during a full moon. Perhaps she could check the Forbidden Forest.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera sneaks out of the castle on a full moon and unwittingly changes her fate.

She honestly couldn't believe how well it worked.

It had been two weeks and Snape still hadn't heard from Slughorn, or anyone, about stealing the ingredients to make Polyjuice. Considering the highly illegal nature of the potion, no one even questioned when she went over to the Restricted Section and pulled out Most Potente Potions. At least she had another alibi. She'd asked for a permission slip months ago to look at the instructions for a rather old, almost outdated, Antidote Potion for Deadly Asps. There had been newer potions that involved less dangerous ingredients, but none of them had the potency of this solution.

She quickly copied the instructions into the few remaining spaces in the chapter index of her Transfiguration textbook, and quietly placed the book back.

She saw Lily quietly reading a few tables away on the other side. She looked so engrossed in her book, Snape wished Lily would change her mind and come back to her.

She walked closer to the table, watching as Lily took her notes, flipped through pages of her books, and unrolled her scrolls of parchment. She felt like the world was melting, she could just look at her all day.

"I really don't appreciate being stared at," Lily interrupted, not looking up from her note-taking. "Do you have something to say?"

Snape blushed, anger boiling inside her. "How dare you?" She seethed.

"Is that all? You don't have to say sorry, but you're going to pretend I'm in the wrong here?" Lily gave an accusatory glare, her eyes glistening.

"I'm never wrong," Snape hissed. "I thought you believed in me, in us."

Lily looked astonished, before becoming grim. "Obviously, this is going nowhere. Come back to me when you're willing to actually talk to me and stop being so irrational."

Irrational? Snape wanted to scream. Instead, she grimaced, and replied acidly. "Fine. I supposed it's not wise to argue with one of your kind."

She briskly walked away, wiping tears from her eyes.

Snape did regret what she said, but she also didn't. If Lily was going to hurt her, Snape was going to hurt her back, and make sure she hurt her worse. She learned that the hard way from both her parents, the only way to win an argument was to destroy the other person. Eventually, they'll come back.

The flies were stewing nicely, another week or so and it should be ready.

Honestly, she was glad the process for stewing insects hadn't changed much in a couple thousand years, and was something they teach even in Third Year. That part was the most time-consuming, but she could do it in her sleep.

As she checked her calendar, it seemed that the date to gather fluxweed would arrive sooner than expected. Hopefully it wouldn't affect the potency too much.

Snape had planned out her excursion to the Forbidden Forest well in advance. While she went to the forest often, her night visits were monthly and almost never on the full moon. It was a shame, since that was the most optimal time to gather potions ingredients, but she had heard the rumors about dark creatures living in the forest. Of course, she had never seen any, though it would be stupid to assume they didn't exist.

But she felt confident enough in her abilities to defend herself, she was more than adept at curses and hexes. And it's not like she really had a choice.

Getting around Filch was the easy part. His schedule was like clockwork. You wait until he's finished his rounds on the Ground Floor, then you walk out the front entrance. He was usually preoccupied with his rounds on the upper floors that Snape could be gone for hours without anyone noticing.

As she trudged through the undergrowth, she used her wand to look for fluxweed, and maybe extra knotgrass. While both grew naturally in the forest, fluxweed was easy enough to confuse with other plants in the mint family.

She hunched over the underbrush, rummaging through the stalks of various plant varieties. While she did find some useful specimens of other plants for future projects, and enough extra knotgrass for more doses of Polyjuice in the future, she was having trouble finding the fluxweed. She needed to look for the small blue flowers, which would be blooming from the moonlight.

While she did see other flowering herbs, even ones in that family, she was not finding what she needed, and she was beginning to get frustrated. Checking her watch, it seems one hour had passed. She was running out of time and if she wasn't careful, her efforts would have been in vain.

On her knees, she bent over to examine the wildflowers. There was Pennyroyal (useful for family planning potions, but not for Polyjuice), Wild Basil (Great for snakebites along with Occamy scales), and too many of a similar variety.

As she shuffled through the leaves, crunching her way through the dead plants beneath her, the cold autumn air buffeted her face and caused her hair to flutter around her eyes. Grumbling, she pushed it back and moved forward. In her concentration, she didn't notice the sound of crunching leaves, snapping twigs weren't from her own footsteps.

As she walked deeper into the forest, the canopy had made it difficult to see the stars, but the moonlight peaked through the leaves and gave the underbrush an eerie silver glow. The soil was more rocky, and she might have better luck if she climbed up to higher ground.

When Snape reached an area of the forest with boulders and larger trees, she saw more flowering plants. If she could get up to that rock.

Suddenly, she heard a howl pierce the night air.

Lifting her wand, she saw a large creature barreling towards her, it looked like a dog but with long spindly limbs and large hind legs. It had no tail, and a large torso, broader than an average dogs.

She cast a stronger Lumos, temporarily blinding the creature and causing it to snarl. She climbed onto the boulder, and grabbed the branches of a nearby tree hoisting herself up. She started throwing hexes, seeing what cuts or blows would slow it down, but it seemed undeterred.

Stinging it did nothing. Cutting Curses seemed to slash through its skin, but it still kept going, its blood running down its arms and torso.

She even aimed for the neck, but it seemed to not have any effect. It was making progress following her up the boulder. Unlike most canines, it seemed this creature had the ability to climb and it was trying to claw its way up the trunk.

Snape took off her shoe and threw it at the creature's head, which slowed it down but also made it angrier. As it let out a snarl, she threw her other shoe.

This was it. She was going to die and no one would even know she was dead. No one would mourn her, and no one would miss her. Not her parents, not her friends, and most of all Lily wouldn't care.

She heard a rumbling and saw in a blur a large tawny stag rush towards the base tree and stand in front of the creature. It looked a little older than a yearling, the antlers were not entirely developed. It bucked, standing on its hindlegs, moving its front legs and using its hooves to kick the creature, causing it to howl in pain. With one last kick, the stag was able to make the creature step backward, and snarl. The stag, sensing the creature's attention was fully on it, returned to its four legs and darted away, narrowly outrunning its opponent.

Snape clung onto the tree, trembling. She felt a stillness in the air as she stopped breathing, her heart pounding in her chest. She panted, too scared to breath properly, but almost too afraid to faint in fear.

She slowly climbed down and regained her bearings on the mossy boulder, as she grabbed the plants growing on top for support, she felt the tendrils and soft blue flowers and knew instantaneously what she was holding. Quickly, she cast Lumos and examined the plant. Yes, it was fluxweed. She hastily gathered it into her bag and hurried back to the castle, keeping watch for any other footsteps in the forest.

Snape spent most of her free time brewing. The more she focused on the potion, the less time she would have to dwell on her own foolishness. How stupid of her to assume she was ready to go out on her own. The fact she couldn't take on even a stupid beast such as a werewolf (she suspected it was a werewolf, and confirmed it through a cursory glance of her Defence textbook) meant that she had overestimated her abilities. She was going to have to train harder. Spend more time practicing spells, and learn how to be faster, how to outmaneuver anything.

As the Polyjuice simmered, she spent some time coming up with drafts for new spells. Maybe one to dismember? One to disembowel? Maybe a modification of the Cutting Curse. It would need some work. Building a good spell meant basing it on the foundation of older ones, particularly wand movements. Once she had an idea of the movements, and intention, one could decide on the incantation. There was a useful spell in Magick Moste Evile in the Restricted Section from the 16thcentury that would make the victim unable to use healing potions. If she could harness the wand movements and embellish them, it was possible to be able to prevent all healing magic – even the incredible healing factor of Dark Creatures, from taking effect.

As she combed her brain for the technicalities on the Magical Theory, she saw they potion change to its proper color and emit that telltale fishy odor. It was finished.

She allowed it to cool, then ladled it into individual vials. One batch of Polyjuice made enough for three to four doses, so she was going to have to be careful about delivering them to Mulciber.

They met at their usual statue, and for once, Snape was nervous. She kept her impassive countenance and acted as sullen as usual.

"These better be top notch," Mulciber grumbled. "I can't afford for you to give me anything half cocked just because I'm going out on a limb for you."

"Do you know how much effort I went through to make this?" Snape hissed. "I almost died! I had to break someone's leg, and steal from the Apothecary Department. With no help from you by the way."

Mulciber grunted and took the pouch carrying the vials. He opened it and frowned.

"So little?" He asked skeptically.

"Each batch only makes a few doses." Snape sneered. "You'd know that if you paid attention in class, Cassius."

"Oh you think you're so clever, don't you Severa." He placed a thick emphasis on her name. "If you knew what you were working for, our goals, you wouldn't be so glib. Its unbecoming of a woman, if I can even call you that."

Snape extended her hand. "I don't care what you call me as long as you pay me."

Mulciber snorted, and reached into his robes to give her a small bag. Snape opened the purse and frowned.

"This is much less than what we agreed on." Snape glared. "Are you trying to stiff me?"

"Well to be fair, Severa we never had a written agreement on how much we would compensate you for your services. And since your previous contributions have been lackluster in quality…"

"That's not true and you know it, they're perfect!" Snape hissed.

"That's highly debatable, Severa. I'd suggest you take the money and leave, you are trying my patience. And anyway, my hands are tied. We had to allocate the budget to something else." He leered as he put away the vials in his pocket. "Besides you should be grateful we are accepting the work of a mere schoolgirl when anyone would pay us for the honor."

"We? There's no we, it's just you and Evan mucking about trying to get your hands into one scheme or the other to impress your Daddy." Snape derided, causing Mulciber to grab her and push her against the wall, one of his arms pinning her down, the other pointed at her face.

"What do you know of what me and Evan are trying to accomplish? You're just a stupid little bint."

She glared at him, their eyes meeting as she glanced through his thoughts. "I know enough," she replied triumphantly.

"You're bluffing." He gripped her shoulder tightly.

"You were planning on blackmailing Minister Jenkins so she could resign, probably because of the Pure Blood riots and the Squib Marches"

Mulciber snorted. Snape continued.

"The next in line if she resigned like Minister Leach did a few years ago would be the Home Sectrary, which would be Mr. Nott. He's one of the Old Guard as it were, but he's considered a moderate by Pureblood standards. What does it benefit for you if he becomes the next Minister?"

"I'd hold your tongue if I were you, or I'd make you." Mulciber threatened.

"Then silence me. All it takes is a flick of your wand, or are you not capable of that?" Snape taunted.

Mulciber sent a stinging hex towards her and she flinched. "I'm not going to pay you off, I pay you enough. I'm warning you, as my friend to drop this or I will have to find out how you found this information out, and I will hurt you."

"You didn't give Mary MacDonald any sort of warning." Snape replied.

"Precisely, I'm telling you this because I respected you, though Merlin knows why. You don't seem to deserve it with your sentimentality to that little Mudblood slut of yours and her friends." Snape kicked him in the shin and tried to get out of his grip but he was too strong. She kicked him again, and started screaming until he placed a Silencing Charm on her. Mulciber grabbed her hair, and glared at her in the eyes, and casted Legimens. Snape couldn't help but smile at his pathetic attempt as she blocked him with her shields.

"Imperio." Mulciber whispered. Suddenly, she felt light as if she was floating. While Snape had read up on the Unforgivables, this was her first time experiencing the out of body terror that she had heard about for years. The ultimate power over someone else.

"Tell me how you found out about the letters." Mulciber asked.

"Someone told me about them," Snape could hear herself replying flatly, but wasn't answering on her own. "I was forced to steal them from Rosier and give them back to Jenkins."

Mulciber swore.

"Who told you?"

"James Potter."

"So all this time we thought you two were enemies when really you were chums? How could you Snape?"

"I walked into your rooms and unlocked your trunks. It only took a Blasting Curse."

"It was a bloody rhetorical question, you know what you can't even understand me now." Mulciber shook his head. He paused, before loosening his grip on her. He ran his hands over her shoulder, and with a slow deliberation, ran his hands over her right breast. She did not move.

His hand glided down her waist and sneaked inside her robes, carefully reaching her cotton briefs. Roughly, she could feel his fingers move downwards, touching her against her will.

She felt out of her own body, like she wasn't experiencing it, but watching it from the outside. She wanted to scream, wanted to tear his fingers off one at a time.

Mostly she felt paralyzed, trapped.

Fight it.

Fight it.

"You know, MacDonald at least responded, you're sitting here like a dead fish." Mulicber chuckled.

Fight it. Think about killing him. Think about stepping on his neck until it cracks, choking him in his own blood.

"Why Miss Snape, I think you'd be in a much better mood if we loosened you up a little." He leered.

"Oi, what's going on here? You know the rules, no students out after curfew. I'll have to mark you up."

Although she couldn't see who it was, she could tell from the voice it was one of the Ravenclaw Prefects a year above them. Mulciber frowned and undid the curse. He gave her a cold smile. "Looks like we'll have to finish this some other time."

As Snape felt her muscles and joints return to normal, she wanted to take out her wand and kill him on sight. But she couldn't. It would be too conspicuous. Plus, disposing of his body would be too much effort.

She wasn't going back to the Slytherin dungeons if she could help it. She was going to sleep in her annex and return in the morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's note: This was a very heavy chapter I know. I know this is a terrible thing to add to fanfiction since it seems like its trivializing assault, but I tried to make it a realistic depiction as far as I could without it being too triggering. Sometimes people can betray your trust who you thought of as a friend at one time, and I can attest to the fact it does feel like an out of body experience. I also wanted to address the fact that sometimes in fiction we read about survivors not being able to fight back as if it's so easy to just beat up their aggressor, but it's not. Another trope I hate in fanfiction that is surprisingly common is the idea of someone coming to the assault survivors aide and 'saving' them like they're some damsel in distress. In this case, no one came to Vera's aide, she just had to deal with a horrible situation that wasn't made worse because of chance. I'd been meaning to write a chapter addressing the idea of assault, partially as a form of my own therapy and partially because it does play an important role in the story later on. It's not some stupid tacked on tragedy or any hack storytelling trope, I promise.
> 
> As to the werewolf incident. While I mentioned I would try to be faithful to the books, I'm borrowing this idea from what was implied in the films and fan based interpretations. It seems there's an accepted fan belief that the Marauders would allow Remus to roam the Forbidden Forest at night and would keep him in line as Animagi. I think in the books he stayed exclusively in the Shrieking Shack. I decided to incorporate that idea as a sort of what if which will lead to further developments in later chapters.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera figures out some unpleasant truths

She was numb.

That's all she could really think about what had happened in the past two days.

While she had squabbled with Cassius in the past, he was her friend. She trusted him.

In her first year, she had been isolated by the other girls. She remembered Niobe had been the instigator in making sure no one acknowledged her existence, and after a rather disasterous encounter with Lily's housemates, it seemed that half the school hated her.

It was around that time she buried herself in her schoolwork, and excelled. If she couldn't get far through connections and blood status, she would certainly use her brains.

And her wits. When she started fighting back, hexing the girls for bullying her, and using spells beyond their skill level, she started earning their respect.

Cassius noticed, and he was the first person who asked her to join the group. She thought he had respected her. They had traded secrets, taught each other spells, they even sent each other birthday presents. She thought he respected her.

Was she on the same level as that Mudblood, Mary Macdonald? She couldn't be.

She mustered up all her effort to be angry, but mostly she just felt tired. It was as if she was as worthless as her father said she was.

Snape stretched, and pulled herself up off the stone floor. It was going to be a long day.

It seems Mulciber had decided to ignore her, he didn't even look her way. But he acted as if nothing had changed. He was still talking to his friends, laughing and joking with the other boys in her House.

Today was Potions with the Gryffindors. Quite possibly the worst possible class combination, however it seems her usual tormenters were subdued. While one of them would usually say something about her appearance as she entered the room, and she'd hex them, she hadn't really had much in the way of interactions with the Marauders as of late. They looked tired, probably hadn't been sleeping from whatever idiotic prank they were planning. Lupin was absent, as usual. They didn't even look up from their desks.

Perhaps they had moved on.

Snape frowned. Wasn't that what she wanted? No. She would have wanted the last word, or really the last curse. She wanted them to suffer and if they thought they could just drop her like she was nothing, they were mistaken.

She would have revenge on everyone who wronged her.

But first, she had to get through this rather boring class.

She stared at the empty workbench on her side. Normally, Lily would be her brewing partner but she hadn't since their falling out last month.

Of course, she could finish the assignment by herself. It was going to be their first official attempt at the Draught of Living Death. She didn't need anyone.

Much to her horror, James Potter sat down next to her, causing the Slytherin boys to laugh in surprise.

'Lowering your standards, Potter?" taunted Rosier.

"The ugly ones are always the easiest," added Mulciber, causing the boys to laugh.

Snape blushed.

"What was that about?" Potter asked.

"What are you doing?" Snape whispered, well screeched quietly.

"I need a partner and you're the only one left," He responded plainly. "I thought it was fairly obvious. And you didn't answer my question." He placed his bag down and lit the fire under the cauldron.

"They know," she murmured. "About your involvement with the letters, about my involvement. They made me tell them."

She got up. "I'll go get the ingredients."

As she walked over to the cupboard, she saw Black look at her with suspicion, while Pettigrew looked mostly anxious, as always. As she walked past her own Housemates, they snickered.

"Better hurry up to your darling Blood Traitor," whispered Rosier.

She sent a stinging hex in his direction, landing straight as his back, causing him to yelp.

As she placed the ingredients on the table, Potter started placing the asphodel roots in the mortar and pestle.

"You're going to need to make sure it's powdered, you're turning it into a paste." Snape jibed. Potter ignored her.

"If you're not going to do it right you could give it to me." She added moodily.

"I think I've got it, thanks." He replied.

He turned to her, lowering his voice. "So they know everything?"

She chopped the wormwood angrily, the juice seeping out onto the cutting board.

"What did they give you in return, I doubt they could make you do anything that didn't benefit you in some way." Potter asked angrily.

Seeing that she would not be getting out of this conversation, she cast Muffliato and let him have it.

"What do I have to gain from losing the respect of my friends? What did I gain from helping you? You've ruined me, Potter. And your being here is only making things worse."

The wormwood juice seeped through her gloves, stinging her hand, she hissed in pain.

Potter reached over and handed her a rag. "Let's just finish the assignment and carry on with our lives then. No need for the dramatics."

"Easy for you to say," Snape snarled, lowering her voice. "I lost everything. Lily thinks I've left her for my Housemates, and they think I've been plotting behind their back and working for you." She wrapped the rag around her hand, taking shallow breaths.

For some reason, this caused Potter to laugh.

"How dare you mock me." Snape wished she was using her knife on him, and not the wormwood.

"Well they aren't wrong, but they wouldn't believe you about your motives? That's your problem Vera, no one can trust you."

"Well I don't pretend to be something I'm not. You act like you're helping the defenseless and the downtrodden, but really you just like having them worship you. What was your angle with Jenkins? Now that you have his gratitude, what are you going to do with it?"

Potter narrowed his eyes and frowned. "Is that what you really think of me? Did it ever occur to you that he was my friend, and I helped him because that what normal people do. It's not all about power plays. And if your friends aren't willing to believe you, maybe they weren't worth keeping."

Snape rubbed the bridge of her nose. "Alright, we've gotten the main ingredients in, now we add anise seeds and the fermented Dendrobatidae eggs, then stir clockwise."

Potter nodded and they continued brewing in silence.

Lupin was present for the next class Snape shared with the Gryffidors, Care of Magical Creatures.

It seemed that Kettleburn was having them handle Thestrals. So no one was likely to get hurt, which was a good thing since he was still recovering from the loss of his most recent limb, but it was a boring enough class since she had yet to see someone die.

Most of the student were given hunks of raw meat, and threw them on the floor, watching them disappear into nothing.

Lupin was petting the air, it seems he was able to get his hands around what looked like a head. Pettigrew was trying to feed it, but it looked like he was being ignored. Curious, she approached them.

"What does it look like?" She asked.

Startled, Lupin jumped and turned around. Noticing it was her, Lupin paled. "Oh, hello Vera. How are things? Are you alright?"

"Don't you have someone else to bother, Scervix?" Pettigrew whined.

"I was asking Lupin a question, not you. I've been better, but that's none of your concern."

"Are you unwell?" He asked, his eyes giving her his full attention. She shrinked instinctively as he looked her over, as if assessing for damage. What did he know?

"Like I said, none of your concern. If you didn't want to tell me about the thestrals, I'll leave."

"No, it's not that." He patted the air again and Snape heard some sort of a noise. "They're like horses. Well not really. They're more skeleton than horse, and they have wings."

"Oh. I thought they'd be a bit more to that given the Ministry's classification." Snape admitted.

Lupin snorted. "The Ministry's always had its priorities mismanaged. They just classify anything they don't understand as dangerous."

"Careful, Remus," warned Pettigrew. Lupin nodded. He reached over, petting what Snape assumed was the muzzle when the sleeve of his robe slid downward.

Snape gasped, despite her self-control. There were deep cuts all along his arms, long gashes around his wrists and forearms that looked like they were barely healing.

Lupin blushed and pulled up his sleeve. Pettigrew put his arm around him protectively.

"Alright Scervix, you had your fun, now piss off before I call Sirius over here." Pettigrew looked angrier than she'd ever seen him before.

Although she hadn't really try to notice, Potter and Black were present, they were a few feet away, talking amongst themselves in hushed tones.

"Very well. I'll leave." She replied acidly. Snape couldn't believe Pettigrew was acting like he was defending Lupin's honor. As if it was her bloody fault when Lupin was the one evidentally causing self-harm.

She was jumpy for the rest of class. Being so close to the forest so soon after the full moon made her feel ill at ease. Knowing there were werewolves lurking on the grounds. At any point one of them could sneak in the school and she would be none the wiser.

While the boys seemed to ignore her, Snape's standing with the girls remained unchanged.

Aoife and Niobe tolerated her existence, and H tried her best to get her to talk to her about normal girlish conversation topics, like robes and unfortunately, boys.

There was one boy in particular H would not stop talking about.

"Cassius helped carry my books today, on the way to Divination. Why didn't you take that elective with me? We could have had so much fun together."

"I never particularly saw the point in it." Snape grumbled.

"Perhaps you don't have the Eye. That's perfectly alright. I think I might, at least I hope I do, it's quite fashionable to be clairvoyant you know. But Cassius and I were partners today while reading tea leaves, and you wouldn't believe what his turned out to be?"

"Was it a Grim?" Snape asked disinterestedly.

"No! By Circe, Severa, you're morbid. It was a heart! I know it was a sign." Honoria bounced onto her bed in happiness.

Snape frowned. "You sure it wasn't a triangle?"

"No it was a heart. I know it. He loves me. Can't you just be happy for me."

"H, I think there's something you need to know about Cassius." Snape looked over at the other two girls, who seemed to be fast asleep. She pulled the curtains of the bed between the two of them.

"Cassius isn't a good man. He likes to hurt girls."

"Oh like those Mudbloods? Boys will be boys, they can't help themselves."

Snape could feel her blood boil. "You knew? And you still care for him?"

Honoria looked panicked, fidgeting with her nightgown. "I know enough. But no one is perfect, he does mean well for the most part, sometimes he just gets carried away. And you know those girls must have been asking for it."

"He did that to me, H. I wasn't asking for it, but he did that to me anyway."

Honoria was silent.

"I thought you were my friend, Severa. You knew I cared for him."

"Didn't you just hear me? I didn't ask for it, he pulled me down and used the Imperius on me." Snape replied venomously. "It was the last thing I could have possibly wanted.

"I'm sure he didn't mean it, he probably misread the signs, you can be a bit of a flirt sometimes." Honoria was beginning to cry. How dare she have the nerve to cry?

"How could I have led him on? I'm objectively hideous, I purposely behave in an odious manner. My behavior is nothing akin to flirting," Snape responded in disgust. "Honoria how can you be so blind? Why don't you believe me?"

"Because I know you just want me to drop him. How do I know you aren't lying?" Honoria spat. She got up and opened the curtains. "We'll talk about this in the morning, right now I'm just too tired to hear you rant about how you think Cassius wronged you. Have you considered maybe you were just as much at fault? If you had followed the rules like I told you, this wouldn't have happened."

Snape closed her curtains and cast a Silencing Charm, then screamed into her pillow.

She couldn't sleep at all that night. When she tried, she thought of Mulciber, and how he had overpowered her. She thought of the werewolf, and how she was almost devoured. Both those times, she had been weak, helpless. She tried, but she wasn't enough.

As she thought, she remembered that she was ironically more successful fighting off the werewolf than her stupid classmate. She was able to send some modified Cutting Curses across the creature's arms. She had made some pretty deep gashes, with any luck cutting into some arteries.

They almost reminded her of the gashes she saw on Lupin's arm earlier today.

Snape jumped up from her bed. It couldn't be. They wouldn't let one of those in Hogwarts.

She was going to have to confront Potter and his gang soon, she had more questions than answers – and it seems she would have an uneasy sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera gets invited to a party

It would be one thing if she could prove that Lupin was a werewolf, but it was another thing entirely if she just had a hunch. First of all, she'd need to follow him and notice his daily habits.

So far she had been carefully keeping her distance. She decided to skip class this morning. She lied to Honoria and told her she had come down with the flu, and since H was not in a charitable mood, she hadn't bothered to wait for her or give her a Pepperup Potion to clear her symptoms.

With her temporary freedom, she sulked and waited. First outside Defense, then followed a few steps behind as they headed for lunch.

It seems they were going over the logistics of some new scheme or the other.

"Moony, you're going to have to distract McGonagall while take care of Darger. Wormtail, you'll need to transform and get into the classroom. Do you think you could carry the things with you?" asked Black

"It will be a bit heavy, but I think I could drag them with my teeth," Pettigrew replied eagerly.

Transform? What were they talking about?

"I wish you didn't leave me with McGonagall duty. I think she knows what I'm doing every time I there to distract her." Lupin complained.

"Of course she does Moony, but she likes you the best out of all of us, so you're our secret weapon," Potter teased.

Lupin laughed, "Piss off. You think the way you and Sirius talked about us we'd be planning our honeymoon soon."

"Well you wouldn't have to travel far, you could probably have it at Hogwarts," Pettigrew joked.

It seemed to elicit a chuckle from the group and Snape ducked as they headed downstairs.

If she waited a minute, she could follow without being seen and catch up to them before they hit the Great Hall.

She checked her watch and counted another twenty seconds.

"Alright, spit it out, why are you following us?"

Snape's eyes widened as she looked up to see Potter standing in front of her looking annoyed.

She lunged forward and took out her wand, aiming it aggressively at him. "How are you here? I just saw you go down the staircase."

"I went back up, obviously." Potter rolled his eyes.

"But I would have seen you walking over here, you couldn't have apparated over!" Snape was beginning to feel her anger rise over something so trivial.

"For the record, you were doing a terrible job, we figured you out sometime before class." Potter folded his arms, looking nonplussed at Snape's offense attack position.

There was something different. Something heavy hanging in the air that Snape couldn't quite place. She wanted to attack, but she felt this weight around her, like the air was pushing her arm down.

"Then why were you talking about transforming?" Snape asked. "Transforming into what?"

"I think we're long overdue on a nice chat Vera."

"Don't you Vera me. You don't deserve that right."

"Very well, Snape. What did you see when you were in the forest last week?"

Snape frowned. "How did you know I was there?"

"I'm asking the questions." Potter deflected. "Your life was in danger, wasn't it? What happened?"

"Is it true then, your friend is one of those creatures? He could have killed me!" Snape snarled.

"He wouldn't have, we had it under control," Potter replied tersely.

"You weren't there, there wasn't anyone there except," Snape paused.

"You were the stag," she concluded. Potter nodded.

"I don't believe it," She replied incredulously, "You're far too stupid to be an animagi."

Potter laughed sardonically, "Believe what you like, it benefits me more if you don't believe it."

"Then why are you telling me this?" Snape furrowed her brows, "If you had any sense you'd leave it be."

"Because I know you're going to keep digging until you find the truth, or use the kernels of misinformation you do find to hurt Remus and that's the last thing he needs right now."

"Who cares what he needs? He almost killed me!" Snape exclaimed. Potter motioned his hands in a downward motion, hinting for her to keep her voice down.

"And he feels awful about it. It's not like he can control himself when he's in that state, but when we are with him, we keep that side of him at bay. He almost seems like himself, even when he's the Wolf." Potter murmured.

"The administration couldn't possibly know they have a monster living among the students. The parents would be out for his head!" Snape whispered.

"They know. The professors know, Dumbledore was the one who made accomodations for Remus."

Snape looked at Potter dubiously. "If that's the case," she countered, "Dumbledore would know to keep a werewolf, even a juvenile one, in an enclosed space with protective charms."

Potter frowned.

"Unless you idiots flouted even the most basic precaution that was taken to make sure your friend didn't endanger anyone."

"No one has ever been in harms way, Most people don't break curfew to wander around the woods and collect mushrooms like a weirdo."

"Oh so I'm to be blamed? Must I be blamed for everything? Should I apologize for existing?" Snape asked hysterically.

"That'd be a nice start," Potter laughed.

Snape felt her resolve break. After the shock of the past few days, she sat down and curled into a ball. Despite herself, she started sobbing.

Potter's face fell. He rubbed the back of his neck and shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

"Oh, um Snape I didn't mean it. Stop it."

She didn't. She was getting to the point where snot was running from her nose.

"Laugh. I'm sure you're happy, aren't you. You've gotten away with this too. I'm just as sorry as you are that Lupin didn't get to eat me for dinner."

"I'm sure you would have just given him indigestion, from all the grease."

Snape threw a hex at Potter, but it missed, hitting a suit of armor.

Potter sat down next to her. "I know it wasn't right. We did break the rules, but I need to know you aren't going to tell anyone. If you do, Remus will be expelled and he won't be able to take his OWLs. His life will be ruined."

"But it's not fair. It's not fair how you can casually disregard the rules, discard people you think are lesser than you, and come out on top. Why does Lupin's life matter, but mine doesn't?"

"Your life matters," Potter responded stiffly.

She glared at him.

"It does," he replied defensively. "I know I'm not the one you'd want to hear it from, but you can't focus on everyone who's wronged you and try to get revenge. How would you benefit from getting Remus expelled? Would you do it for the sense of self-satisfaction?"

"You wouldn't know what if feels like, you and your friends have been humiliating me, torturing me for years." She sobbed angrily.

"If I recall, you were the one who tricked us on the Hogwarts express by stealing my collection of Chocolate Frogs and using the Jellylegs Jinx on us."

"Are you that petty, Potter? Five years of torment over that?" Snape yelled.

Potter sighed. "No. It wasn't that, and I don't think I need to explain why I've been at odds with you, you know it as well as I do."

They sat in silence for a moment, catching their breath. Snape thought of Lily, and how she lost her. Of course they shared classes, but it was like she had become a stranger..

Snape piped up. "You're going to miss lunch at this rate."

"I'm not hungry." Potter mumbled.

Snape decided to ask the question that had been on her mind for years.

"Why Lily?"

Potter raised his eyebrows. "Do you really need to ask that question? What isn't there about Lily that that would make one fall in love with her?"

"She steals the blankets, also she has a bad habit of interrupting people in the middle of their sentances, and spoiling the ending to novels."

"How'd you reckon on the first one?" Potter asked suggestively.

Snape glared. "It wasn't like that. We used to sleep over all the time when we were kids. Well, I mostly went over to her house. Do you really love her?"

"I think so. I mean, I've felt this way about her since First Year, and it hasn't changed."

"Well good luck. I'm not sure why you needed to consider me a rival, I was never in the running, as the proverbial saying goes." Snape remarked gloomily.

"It seemed like it. You two were so close. Too close. What you had with her, even if I could convince Evans to take a chance on me, I don't know if I'll ever be as close to her as you were and I hate it. It's like there's a part of her you know that I'll never know and it's like a completely different person who I would love to meet, but I never will."

"Jealous someone had a toy you wanted and threw a tantrum?" Snape taunted.

"It's not like that, it was never like that. I don't think Lily's some sort of prize. But I can't help feeling how I feel about her, and although I can't prove it, I think she might feel the same way about me if she gave me a chance."

Snape snickered.

"You laugh, but it's possible."

"Why not move on at least, find some other girl to torment with your neediness?"

"Oh, like you?" Potter asked defensively.

"Thanks to your fiasco, Mulciber and the rest of the Slytherins think we are involved in some way."

Potter cringed.

"Do they think we're involved involved?

"Well I wasn't in a state to clarify anything, so I think they just assumed." Snape replied.

Potter shook his head, and laughed. His messy hair moving across his face. He ran his hands through his hair, shaking it out.

"Then let's do it." He declared.

"What?" Snape asked sourly.

"Be my girlfriend, let's let those Slytherins stew it their outrage for a bit. I think it would be funny."

"Absolutely not," Snape replied.

"Well if they're going to assume anyway, wouldn't it make sense to go through with it? I'm sure you'd get a bit of a popularity boost dating a Pureblood."

"But you're a Blood traitor, so it's not like it would make a difference." Snape countered.

"I'm still a Pureblood, trust me, it makes a difference. And it would only be for a little bit. Do you have a date to Sluggy's Yule bash?

"I wasn't invited," Snape muttered.

Potter looked surprised. "Really? You're one of the best students in our year. I mean, Evans is going so it's not like he's prejudiced or anything. Well that settles it, you're going as my plus one."

"Don't I get a say in this?" Snape snarled.

"Sure. But I think it would be fun, and it's not like you're doing anything. I know you'll be in the Castle for the hols. Maybe you and Evans can patch up at the party."

Snape did think about it. It would be nice to have an excuse to talk to Lily again. And it would look rude if Lily ignored her, so she might have to interact with her.

"Plus, if I'm with you, it's not like I can ask out Evans for a few weeks, it's a win for you."

Snape looked at him suspiciously. "I won't have to do anything with you, will I?"

"Merlin, no. This is more of a social experiment. There will be no hanky panky involved and I'm hoping you keep your hands to yourself Snape."

"Oh please, like anyone would want to touch you. I've seen what you've got."

"You'd be surprised, I'm not unpopular with the ladies," Potter boasted.

"Then conduct your social experiment on them. Don't try this Eliza Doolittle nonsense on me."

"Who's Eliza Doolittle?" Potter asked curiously.

Snape sighed. "Galatea."

"Oh," Potter nodded in understanding. He stood up, and offered her a hand. She refused and got up on her own.

Potter stopped smiling, his face completely devoid of humor. "This was surprisingly not unpleasant. But I still have to know. Can I count on you to keep Remus's secret?"

"What are my options if I don't?" Snape asked harshly.

"I'd tell Dumbledore, and you could also possibly be expelled. Also, I could stop you from telling at all."

"How?" Snape asked curiously.

"I don't know if you noticed, but I did save your life the other day."

"So that's what that feeling is? I owe you a life debt. I don't think you can cash that in for my silence." Snape spat.

"Technically, I could. But I still hope we can reconcile our differences."

Snape glowered. "Alright, you have my silence for now. And as long as it benefits me. But no more than that."

"Great." He checked his watch, "Merlin, it seems I'm almost late to class."

Potter ran down the hallway, and turned around to shout to her, "I'll fill you in on the details about the Yule party. I've got some owls to send and we can discuss it later. Go tell your Mulciber and his lot if they try to mess with you, they'll have to deal with me!"

Snape blinked. She felt the acid build up in her stomach, but exhaled as the weight of the air released its tension off her body. She wondered if that feeling of the life debt would follow Potter from now on.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera gets a new set of dress robes. They do not suit her.

To say that news of their relationship travelled fast would be an understatement. It seemed that everyone at school had become aware of their attachment, and were equal parts incredulous and curious.

"How did it even happen? That's what I want to know," asked Aoife.

"Oh, don't be so hard on her, it was a long time coming," commented Niobe. "I mean couldn't you see the chemistry between them? It was only a matter of time before you two got together."

Snape really couldn't fathom how they came to that conclusion. Apparently expressing extreme hatred to a boy meant you were secretly in love with them? Since when? Why was this so accepted?

Honoria had been fairly quiet about the whole situation. While she and Snape hadn't had much in the way of a conversation since Snape confessed to her about the incident – she had yet to acknowledge it for what it was, calling it the incident just sounded better in her head- Honoria had seemed to have forgotten any anger she had with her. Perhaps hearing that she was no longer a threat to her beloved Cassius's affections was enough to make her satisfied, or maybe she realized that their other housemates ignored her as much as they ignored Snape.

"Where did you even hear about it? I certainly haven't told anyone. And frankly, my personal life is none of your business." Snape remarked as she brushed her hair. It was still greasy, even though she had washed it last night.

"Aha! So it is true," Aoife laughed triumphantly. "Well if you couldn't land my brother, I supposed James Potter is the next best thing. Good show, Severa. Maybe we could learn a thing or two from you." She and Niobe continued to laugh shrilly.

"Well," Niobe clarified, "I was talking to Rebecca Abbott, who had heard from Emily Boot, who had heard from Trowler, of all people, who heard straight from the Hippogriff's mouth as it were. He was talking to one of his mates at practice and he had a fit. Absolutely furious."

"Which one?" asked Snape.

Niobe gave her a wicked grin. "Guess."

"Obviously Black then."

"I heard they were close to dueling in the changing room." Niobe added. "Though I have no idea why anyone would get into such a row over you."

Snape cringed. She knew this was going to be a bad idea, but she didn't think that Potter was going to go head first into something so stupid without informing his friends. It seems that even he knew they wouldn't have agreed with this plan.

The comments from her fellow classmates, especially the boys, certainly wasn't better.

In fact, whenever she passed them in the Common Room, it seems like their remarks were increasingly off-colour.

"Looks like Snape was more of a social climber than she let on"

"She's probably with him because she's loose."

"She must be a freak to have snagged Potter. Wonder if she's amiable if you know what I mean."

It didn't help that she still thought about the incident. Did she seem that way? Was it her fault? She kept herself up at night thinking about what she could have done, how she could have stopped it.

While Mulciber seemed to mostly ignore her, he the least of her problems. It seemed that even the notion of dating Potter was considered a betrayal by her peers. They had shut her out of their talks, she lost her place by the fire, and it seems none of her friends ever asked her to study with them anymore.

It was a shame really, because she had always been closer to the boys than the girls. Though they'd never admit it, the boys would always ask for her help for hexes, and her expertise in spellcrafting made her a valuable asset.

The strangest of all though was the reception from other students. It seems that the collective student body had somehow remembered she existed and wondered what was so special about her.

In her classes, it seemed that other people-particularly other girls- were sitting next to her (much to her annoyance, she'd always liked having a wide berth of empty seats). People she had never noticed before were striking up irritating small talk with her about classes, hobbies, and worst of all Witch Weekly articles.

She had no interest in any of that nonsense. If they wanted to know what she had done to catch her fake boyfriend, they should ask him!

She was having a particularly irritating, one-sided discussion with a Hufflepuff a few minutes before Arithmancy when she felt a tap on her shoulder.

"Could I talk to you for a minute?" Lily asked.

Arithmancy was one of the few classes that didn't have the two House split of students. Since it was a low-demand elective, all students interested in the class took it together.

Snape blinked. "Well, if you'd like."

Her heart was pounding so loudly she wondered if Lily could hear it.

"Listen," Lily began, "I've heard a ridiculous rumor about you, and I know it's silly, but I had to hear it from you so I could tell everyone it was fase. Potter has been insufferably vague about the whole thing, he's been finding it too amusing to dispel."

"It's true," Snape interrupted.

Lily's eyes widened. "What?"

"Well, partly true. We are an item, but it's kind of a long story." Snape mumbled.

"Really, why?" Lily sounded like she was asking her as if she had a choice.

"Like I said, long story. Maybe we could meet later and discuss the details?"

Lily shook her head. "Wish I could, but I'm swamped with end of term duties. And you don't have to justify yourself to me Vera, if he does make you happy who am I to say otherwise. But, let me know if he bothers you, alright?"

As the professor entered the classroom, everyone returned to their seats.

Snape whispered, "Will I see you soon?"

Lily bit her lip and nodded.

"I think so," She replied. "Maybe. And Vera, I'm sorry. I think I was wrong, about before."

Snape couldn't bring herself to pay attention at class.

Throughout November, Snape found herself receiving parcels. While she had never received post from her parents in her entire time at school, she was receiving letters almost daily from her supposed boyfriend.

First they were insipid love notes- "Thinking of you," or "My dearest,"

It seemed to be for the benefit of those around her, would seemed to be equal parts amused and horrified.

Around the third day, she received a rather cryptic note that asked, "What are your measurements?"

"Oh, that's pretty cheeky," teased Aoife, who was once again reading over her shoulder. Snape pushed her away.

"You should probably respond, the last thing you'd want is for him to get you something that doesn't fit," urged Honoria.

Snape crumpled up the note and threw it under the table.

The next day, she received another note.

"Thank your friends for writing back to me, saved me the effort from having to guess."

Of course Snape was furious, while Aoife and Niobe burst into a fit of giggles.

While she would have been annoyed with the notes, it would have been bearable.

What was unbearable was having James Potter show up and pretending that it was completely normal to be sitting next to her in Defence, placing his arm around her shoulder.

"Hello my dearest, how are you this fine morning?" Potter asked full of bravado

"Remove your hand from my person or I will rip it off." Snape muttered

"Trouble in Paradise?" taunted Rosier. Mulciber snickered.

Snape glared at them, then grabbed Potter's arm, sliding it off her shoulder.

"I prefer my private life to be private." Snape replied, with gritted teeth.

"That's just how we are, every relationship has its quirks, it just makes our bond stronger," Potter grinned.

"Laying it on a bit thick, aren't you?" mumbled Snape.

"Oh come on, it's amazing, you're not loving this?" Potter asked. Snape huffed.

"What about your stooges? I've noticed Black and the other two are awfully quiet." Mulciber probed.

"Did you say something, I hadn't noticed." Black drawled. Black got out a scroll of parchment and his quill and started writing on his notes, even though class hadn't started yet.

"Oh come off it, you're not telling me you lot are ok with this?" Rosier laughed.

Black continued to lazily doodle on his parchment ignoring him, while Lupin shifted uncomfortably in his seat. Pettigrew just sat there, eyes wide and looking from them to Potter, looking for a cue.

"It seems the Half-blood knows what I'm talking about, fess up Lupin, you're finding this union to be as incongruous as we do." Mulciber continued.

"If James sees something in Severa, I'm sure there's something redeemable about her. As his friends we're going to stand by him." Lupin reasoned. He did not look like he believed it.

"Well it seems that Snape is kind of the one settling here," remarked Rosier. "I mean it Severa, we might have our differences but you're still our friend. Consider your choices before it's too late."

When Darger finally entered the classroom and everyone settled down, the conversation ended. Potter remained next to her for the rest of lecture, even though he was sitting a row away from his friends.

Next week was practical demonstrations. Snape decided she was going to ask Potter to be her partner, she'd certainly have fun hexing him for getting her into this mess.

As they left class, Potter followed her out.

"Do you need to be so public about the whole thing?" Snape hissed. "I've had to go through so much judgement because of your decision."

Potter laughed, but it had a bitter edge to it. "It's not like you have anything to lose though really? You don't have any friends. I actually had a real row with my friends about you. And it was pretty bad."

"Then why didn't you tell them the truth?" Snape asked. "It'd be easy enough to clear up."

"I will, soon enough. But it's not going to be believable if everyone knows what we have is fake. So what's the plan about those two? There hasn't been any trouble on your end has there?"

Snape pursed her lips. It wouldn't do to tell him about the incident.

"No, nothing yet." She answered.

"And what about your extracurricular activities? Are you still making potions for them?"

Snape stopped walking. "How did you know about that?"

"Just a hunch, but glad you could confirm it. I mean you were gathering ingredients on a full moon, and you've been spending less time in the Potions classroom and more time in some strange annex in the basement. Also, you were meeting Mulciber beside one of the entrances into the village, probably your point of distribution. Either that or you two go there for some sort of tryst. You're not two-timing on me are you?" Potter joked.

"I was brewing for them, pretty large batches, but they haven't asked me for anything new since they found out about, well my connection to you. I suppose they think I'm compromised." Snape confessed.

Potter nodded. "Know anything about what they were for?"

"No. Not my business." Snape brushed off.

"I guess not. Well, onto business then. Do you consider yourself an autumn or more of a winter?"

"Excuse me?" Snape asked, startled.

"Do you have any dress robes? Just thought I'd ask." Potter moved closer to her. If this was a mode of intimidation it wasn't going to work on her. Snape stepped back. Potter noticed and stood where he was.

"No, but I'm sure my school robes will be sufficient. Or I can write to my mother and ask to borrow hers."

"Oh that won't be necessary." Potter added, though he didn't explain why. "Well Vera, I must be off. Don't look at me like that, I don't get to call you Vera even if I'm your boyfriend?"

"No you haven't earned it." Snape replied moodily.

"Then I hope to. Well, I best be off. But we should see each other again before the end of term, or at least before the party. Do you have any free days on exam week?"

"Just Thursday."

"I think I can work with that." Potter adjusted his bag around his shoulder and headed towards Gryffindor tower. "See you around, Snape. And I hope this means I won't be seeing you turn me upside down any time soon."

"As long as you or your friends don't antagonize me, I don't think it will be a problem." Snape countered.

"Very well, consider it a truce. Though I'm holding you responsible for our behavior in that timeframe. We are very unruly when we are bored and I must admit, you were a formidable distraction."

"Only a distraction?" Snape asked rhetorically, "I better have been the bloody bane of your existence or it just wouldn't have been fair."

Potter rolled his eyes. "Alright, you were an absolute nightmare. If I wasn't coming up with new ways to torment you, I was fantasizing about various scenarios in which you reach an untimely end."

"Thank you. I appreciate that." Snape replied cooly.

"Is that so? I thought you'd be horrified." Potter stated with a calm interest, gauging her reaction.

"It makes me feel better knowing you're not so noble or perfect as you try to show off to the others. Deep down, you're just as horrid as I am." Snape claimed triumphantly.

"Do you really think I'm perfect?" Potter asked nervously.

"I didn't say you were, only that you strive to be. To be frank, you miss the mark."

Potter huffed and ruffled his hair, scratching the back of his head. "Well you certainly aren't a prize, yet Lily adores you. So I guess I don't have to be 'perfect' as you say. Maybe I should try being as horrid as you are."

"Wouldn't work. She only tolerates that from me because she likes me." Snape gloated.

"Then what does that say about you?" Potter asked. Snape paused.

"We don't have to be so public anymore if you're uncomfortable. I think we've made the point clear about being together. But I do want to see you before end of term. Is that acceptable?" Potter taunted.

"Yes, it is acceptable," jeered Snape. "Though I think you'll have given up on this farce long before then."

Potter left for good this time, and Snape headed back to her her rooms.

While she received love notes for the next few days, she never saw much of Potter face to face after that. They shared classes, but there was mostly the polite greetings and he would sit by his friends – who still looked as confused as ever- and she would sit by herself.

About two weeks later, she received a parcel in the owl post.

"Twilfitt and Tattings?" Honoria looked over her shoulder.

"Oh, open it up Severa!" urged Niobe. "This hardly seems like something you'd usually receive."

"It's probably a postal error," countered Aoife, adding butter to her toast.

Snape quickly ripped open the parcel and gasped.

It was a set of dress robes in sage green silk with white embroidery and a pale grey slip. Attached was a dark grey brocade sash to tie the outfit together.

Inside was a note.

"I hope to see you dazzle by my side, only the best for my dearest. Love, James."

Niobe snatched the note from Snape's hands.

"He bought you clothes?" she shrieked.

Aoife ran her hands over the silk. "Oh they're gorgeous. Much too pretty for you though."

Honoria frowned. "I don't think the color palette will match your complexion, but I'm sure you can make it work," she concluded optimistically. "We'll do your hair, and maybe we can help with your makeup."

"Oh darling I can't." Niobe added. "I'll be busy making my own preparations that night, and so will Aoife."

Aoife nodded. "It's true, I'm going with Regulus, and I must look my best."

"And I'll be escorting Cassius," Niobe added, "it will be quite lovely. Are you going, Honoria?"

Honoria's eyes seemed to water, but she inhaled deeply and smiled. "Well I guess it's just us two then, Severa? Oh it will be ever so much fun. We'll have much to discuss the next few days."

"We have exams, H." Snape muttered.

"Well, yes, but this is just as important."

Snape felt like she was beginning to descend into her own personal hell.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera attends the Yule party

Snape centered herself and took a deep breath.

She had been focusing on distancing herself, compartmentalizing her emotions.

It had been an effective coping tool when she was younger. It was a great way to drown out her parents arguing, or when her mother purposely would shut herself out from her life, or when her father hit her.

The further one felt in terms of emotional distance, the less likely one was to feel pain.

So she had been trying it with her feelings about the incident. She knew all things considered, she was fortunate. She hadn't been raped, but she still felt a deep sense of dread when she had to see him in class, or in the Common Room. She felt she had her sense of power taken away from her in a place she had always considered safe, Hogwarts.

One of the best tools for compartmentalization was to literally do just that: to imagine locking the memory up in a safe, far away and buried deep. Store the safe in a stone room in a castle, lock it, and walk up the stairs and outside and past the drawer bridge.

Snape could, if she wanted to, easily shut down in the face of something horrible. She had done that plenty of times when her father shouted at her or hurt her. Shutting down in front of Mulciber was no different. During the whole event, she was numb, physically and emotionally, to everything around her.

She wondered how Mary MacDonald handled the situation. Snape didn't know if she could even broach the subject with her. They were acquaintances at best, it just didn't seem appropriate to talk about.

It was best not to think about it. To focus on building those walls. She had been increasing her study of Occulmency. While she had a natural affinity for it, she had been learning the basics ever since she was a child. Some of her earliest memories of her mother were of her combing through her mind, looking through her memories every time she misbehaved and never trusting her. Mother used to do the same thing to Father, but Father never had the ability to block her out. It wasn't intentional at first, but then it happened one time when she was five and Mother had accused her of stealing money from her purse to buy sweets.

Mother tried to barge into her memories like usual, but she couldn't.

At first she was startled, but she didn't get angry at her for it. Instead she dropped the subject and mostly ignored her. Ever since, there had been a push and pull between the two of them. If she was ever suspected of anything, Mother would probe, and she would block. By now she had felt fairly confident in her abilities but that would not be enough. She'd need to practice more to fight off the Imperius.

As she lay in bed, she thought about the set of dress robes lying at the foot on top of her trunk. This was going to be a nightmare.

Gingerly, she got up and lit her wand. She lifted open the box and felt the delicate silk against her fingertips. She'd never owned anything made of silk before, only wool or cotton. Her mother owned a pair of Nylon stockings she had tried on once, but Mother yelled at her and demanded her to put them away before she tore them.

Uneasily, she lifted the robe up and placed it over herself while looking in the mirror. It fit tightly around the torso and flared out down the legs. There probably wouldn't be any time to let it out. While Honoria wasn't wrong, the color did make her look even more sallow than usual, Snape had to admit it was a nicely made garment.

But that was the problem. An ugly girl in a pretty dress wasn't going to look pretty, it would just emphasize her ugliness. Perhaps that was Potter's plan the whole time, to humiliate her in front of everyone.

She decided it would probably be a good time to get some air.

She grabbed her cloak and walked out to the Common Room.

"Where are you going at this hour?"

Snape stopped walking and turned to see Regulus, in his pyjamas with the Transfiguration textbook in his lap. He had a scroll of parchment unfurled, his meticulous notes charmed to glow at the spot he was studying.

"Just getting some air." Snape replied curtly.

"At three in the morning? Nice ensemble by the way. Though I'd pair it with a proper slip underneath and not a nightgown."

Snape noticed she was still wearing the dress robes and sighed. She would have to go back and change.

"Was it from your beloved?" Regulus asked jokingly.

"Oh, not you too." Snape groaned.

As she turned to head back to her room, Regulus motioned for her to stop.

"Wait, I just wanted to know what's going on with you two."

"Why would you care?" Snape asked.

She took a spot on one of the nearby armchairs. This might take a while.

Regulus chose his words carefully, "Well, you must admit it's a bit out of sorts for the two of you to get involved, considering your history together."

"And it's a bit off that someone like him would go for someone like me?" Snape asked accusingly.

"If we really are being blunt, then yes," Regulus replied. "So what's the reason?"

"No reason," Snape grinned menacingly. "We're just madly in love. Can't keep our hands off each other."

Regulus winced. "That was an image I could have done without. And I don't believe you."

"Do you need to? I don't think it's any of your concern," Snape rebutted.

"Well if this is a part of one of your schemes, then shouldn't I be kept abreast? We are partners in crime after all." Regulus casually turned a page and looked up, awaiting her response.

Snape chewed her chapped lip and thought about it. "Alright. You're partially right, it wasn't entirely organic in development. Potter knows that Rosier found out about the break-in, and thinks that if we're involved they are less likely to attack me in retaliation."

Regulus furrowed his brows. "Do you think they're capable of that?"

"With that much at stake, I know they are," Snape replied darkly. "I'm not sure we went about it the right way though, because I feel like they're more likely to do so to get a rise out of him, and I'll be the collateral damage."

"Oh come off it, Snape, you'll never be collateral damage. You cause it." Regulus pointed out.

Despite herself, Snape grinned.

"Will you be going to Slughorn's party?" Snape asked.

"Too young. I'll probably be there next year though."

"Pity. I would have appreciated having someone with half a brain to talk to."

"Then you'll have to be content to talk with your boyfriend. Who you should probably address by his first name. Keep calling him Potter and people are going to think something's not entirely right with you two."

Snape nodded, and decided she felt too tired to sneak out. She had far too much to think about for the next few days.

December went by fairly fast.

While Snape was sure the professors had eased up on the difficulty of the exams this year because of OWLS, it certainly didn't look like it to her peers, who were mostly cooped up in the library studying like mad.

All the while, it seemed that while she and Lily had tentatively patched up their argument, she was avoiding her.

Snape wasn't sure why exactly, but if Lily wanted space she would give it.

The Thursday before the end of exams, Snape made her way over to the empty classroom she and Potter had decided to meet in. It was still two hours from curfew, it certainly would not do to be caught sneaking around with her supposed boyfriend, so they'd have enough time to get their meeting over and done with.

"Thought you were going to be a no show," remarked Potter. He was lounging in one of the desks and idly fiddling with a snitch in his hands. He must have come back from practice.

"Are you allowed to take those?" asked Snape.

"It's mine, my dad gave it to me. Wanted me to try out for Seeker, but I didn't really have the build for it." Potter replied wistfully. "It's just sort of something to do, you know? Helps me focus."

"Oh." Snape nodded noncommittedly. "So what did you call me here for? Other than to waste my time."

"As charming as ever, aren't you Severa?"

Snape let out a sound of disgust. "Do you really have to call me that?"

"I mean, it would look odd if I didn't. That's why I wanted to talk to you. We're going to have to get our story straight." Potter motioned for her to sit down on the other desk and took out some parchment and a dictation quill. He charmed it to start writing.

"Our story?" Snape asked. "I think it's pretty simple. We both went temporarily mad and decided we were mutually interested in each other."

"Yes, but when, how, why? We've got to be consistent or it we'll give it away right off the bat." James laid out his plan so the quill could hear, "So I say we keep it simple: you couldn't resist my overwhelming charisma and you confessed your love to me, and I agreed to start seeing you."

"Absolutely not." Snape replied, arms folded.

The quill stratched out the previous statement, leaving a blot of ink at the end of the paper.

"Why not? Seems plausible enough." Potter replied casually.

"Do you genuinely think women are resisting the urge to fling themselves at you or are you just joking, please tell me it's the latter." Snape leaned back in her chair and let it rest against the wall. If he was trying to use casual lounging as a power move, she could do that too.

"Well, you aren't most women, Snape. You barely count as one."

"Thank you, James. This is my point exactly."

Potter raised his eyebrow at that statement.

"What are you implying?"

"I think the false bravado isn't really working for you. I'm sure you're considered objectively favorable to some woman or the other, but it seems like you're trying too hard. Who are you trying to prove yourself to?"

James yelled, "Oh you're one to talk. You can't even take care of yourself. You don't have much in the way of looks Snape, but you could at least try to wash your hair, or put on some makeup. I wasn't going to ask this but now I have to, are you going to try to look presentable?"

"What's the point? I'm still going to look like hag in a ballgown anyway." Snape yelled back.

She paused. "Why did you give me those robes anyway? Is it to humiliate me?"

Potter snorted. "Not everything is about you, Snape."

"Then enlighten me. Was it because you didn't want to be ashamed being seen with me in my school robes?"

"Partially," he replied, "And I thought it would be fun seeing you squirm, looking out of place in designer robes, and having to actively socialize with others, it would be torture for you."

"And to have me do it all by your side like I'm some trophy," she sneered.

Potter's eyes widened. "Well, I didn't think of that part, I needed a way to get you there and being my date was the easiest. But if you're into that, that's fine by me."

"Well now you've spoiled your little joke. Why tell me now?"

"Because you're still going to go see Evans." Potter deduced.

And damn it all, he was right.

They quickly settled on a story and left it at that.

The night of the party felt like it had gone on for eternity and she hadn't even set out of the Slytherin dormitories yet.

Honoria had been trying all sorts of potions for her hair, and it still looked limp and greasy.

She even got out her trusty bottle of Sleekeazy's, which ended up slicking it in a sort of wet look- which wasn't ideal for shoulder length hair. In frustration, Honoria tied it into a bun.

While H was insisted on makeup, Snape vehemently refused. No matter how much Honoria begged, she would never give into any trends that involved blue eye shadow.

When Snape approached the foot of Gryffindor tower, she was beginning to wonder if she really should just skip the whole thing. This was a bad idea.

But if she did, would she get another chance to talk to Lily without her trying to run away?

She waited about five minutes until she saw Potter and Black leave the portrait.

"I didn't think you'd show, Scervix." Black taunted.

"You don't look terrible," Potter stated approvingly.

"Thank you, now let's get this over with."

As the headed to the party, Black kept making jibes about her looks, and it was obvious he was trying to get a reaction out of her. Was he trying to get her to start something? Maybe annoy her into leaving?

He wasn't going to get that satisfaction. But what would bother him?

Smiling, she wrapped her arm over Potter's waist and rested her head on his shoulder.

"Oh darling, I think it's wonderful you asked me to accompany you to this event. It was about time we went public."

Startled, Potter blushed. "Yes, well, if you're happy so am I my dearest," he stammered. His eyes were pleading towards Black, who looked furious. His face was turning red.

She almost wanted to keep up the farce but stopped as they reached closer to the party.

It was a rather intimate affair by Slughorn's standards. There were small Christmas trees floating at various corners of his office, and vaulted arrangements of holly and evergreen branches wrapped in green and silver tinsel. The furniture had been moved out and a long table had been laid with a long white tablecloth and full table settings.

"Ah James, m'boy! Sirius! So glad you could come!" Slughorn patted Black on the back, he winced.

"Hello, Professor, thank you for inviting us." Potter replied politely.

"Not at all, please make yourselves comfortable. I've got a few of my former students here – over there is Amadeus Fenwick, a very skilled Enchanter who might have some advice on getting in the field. And we have an esteemed guest from the ICW, he's a recent graduate from Uagadou and might have some tips if you're interested in politics."

"We certainly will, Professor. But first we might just say hello to our peers."

"Splendid!" He replied "Jerome, m'boy!" He turned around and started greeting a Hufflepuff sixth year.

Snape wasn't bothered that Slughorn didn't even acknowledge her presence and ambled her way among the crowd to find Lily.

She was having an animated conversation with the Enchanter, and she looked gorgeous. She was wearing a set of emerald green dress robes that matched her eyes, and her auburn curls tumbled down her back.

She looked amazing

Snape stood next to her, taking in her presence.

"Oh hello there, are you interested in Enchanting too, young lady?"

Lily turned over to look at Snape. "Vera!" Much to Snape's surprise she hugged her. Snape reluctantly hugged back.

"How are you? It's been ages! Mr. Fenwick, this is my friend Vera Snape. She's brilliant, especially at Defence and Potions."

"Certainly not as brilliant as you are Miss Evans, I assume. Horace has been singing your praises about how you're practically a prodigy. Especially impressive considering your background."

Lily smiled weakly. "Yes, quite. It has been lovely learning more about your research Mr. Fenwick but I think I'd like to catch up with Vera."

"Of course, by all means."

"What a tosser," muttered Snape.

"Vera!" Lily gasped. "But you're right, he is. Has some really interesting work for voice-commanded cauldron control."

"Seems impractical and takes all the precision out of potioneering."

"That's what I was thinking but they'd be bloody convenient if they were reliable."

Snape shook her head. "Lily, I know I said some rather hurtful things earlier, if you're avoiding me because of that…"

"I'm not avoiding you Vera, I've just been busy."

"Lily, please. I need to say this. I'm sorry, and I mean it. Maybe I have been blind to my own bias and maybe I have been letting myself be blind to it, but I'm trying to fix that. I want us to get back to where we were before all this, and get back to us."

"Vera, that's very sweet but you don't have to explain anything to me I forgive you."

"You do?" Snape couldn't believe it.

"Of course, but I need you to be willing to act because you want to, and not because you think it's something that I'd want. Oh hello, Potter. Glad to see you here," she replied blandly.

Potter had escaped the large circle of students gathered around the ICW representative and found them, much to Snape's annoyance.

"Likewise, Evans. You look very nice this evening." Potter wrapped his arm around Snape's waist and she winced. Probably payback.

"Careful, Potter. You don't want to be too gushing in front of your date." Lily said vexingly. Snape thought it was a bit strange, but perhaps she was making sure Snape wasn't feeling insecure. She needn't have bothered.

"Oh, of course not. No one can compete with her tonight, I think she looks stunning," He turned to Snape and gave her a smile that looked almost fond. "Darling, we're about to be seated, we can talk with Evans later."

Dinner was a subdued affair, mostly Slughorn regailing students about his many connections, the respected guests getting a few words in edgewise, and students murmuring amongst each other.

Snape sat in silence, while Potter and Black talked amongst themselves.

Black made a rather off comment about a snake getting caught in her knickers, and Potter stifled a laugh before remembering that he was supposed to be defending her honor from such remarks.

"Oh come off it, mate. It's just a joke," muttered Black. "You can take a joke, right Scervix?"

Snape raised an eyebrow, and took a sip of her water. "Of course I can Sirius, but only if they're funny."

Black frowned. "You and Prongs might be seeing each other, but we're never going to be on first-name basis."

"Noted." She continued sipping her water.

"And when this farce of a relationship is over, we'll be back to our usual schedule." Black ontinued.

"Has James said our relationship was a farce?" Snape asked, trying to act hurt. "Because to me, it's very real. James, how could you?"

"Darling, it's not like that at all," Potter pleaded, "Please sit down, you'll make a scene." Potter looked like he would melt into the floor. Good.

"Very well then, My love." She placed her hand on his and reveled when she saw him flinch. "But your friend better apologize."

"I certainly will not." Black huffed.

"C'mon mate, just this once?" Potter asked.

Black started rubbing his temples. "I think I'm going to head in early tonight. You two can stay, but I have a splitting headache." He got up from the table and headed out the door.

Potter glared at her. "Now look what you've done. I hope you're satisfied."

"Extremely. Shall we dance after dinner?"

"Only if you don't step on my toes."

She did.

After they left the party, Snape felt giddy even though she hadn't had any alcohol. She had patched things up with Lily and ruined Black's evening all at once.

Potter looked miserable walking back.

"So was the plan to make Lily jealous? Because I think it was terribly thought out." Snape remarked casually.

"You don't think so? She certainly looked like she was jealous." Potter reasoned.

"Only because you were flirting with her in front of me. I think she respects me enough not to engage in that kind of behavior."

"Well she has been avoiding you lately, and for some reason she's been more eager to talk to me lately in a more civil manner. I think that's a positive sign."

Snape assessed him. "How often does she engage in arguments with you usually?"

"Well, usually we would argue about you," Potter continued eagerly, "But, now that things have changed between us, she's been talking to me about all sorts of things- mostly classes, but the other day we had a really nice conversation about Muggle music. Did you know she likes rock music too?"

"If you could count the Bay City Rollers as rock." Snape scoffed.

"But I think she's coming around. You're being by my side was apparently the catalyst for us to stop fighting. Who knows? Maybe once we officially 'break up', she might say yes if I ask her out."

"Of course she wouldn't. She would never date a friend's ex. It's considered a faux pas amongst girls."

Potter's face fell. "Is that so?"

"And anyway, she's not jealous. She's just being nice to you because you're my boyfriend. The minute we 'break up' things will go back to normal."

"Want to prove it?" he challenged. "I was thinking we'd end this after tonight, but let's keep it going until OWLS. If she hasn't changed in her behavior after that point, then perhaps you're right."

"You wouldn't be able to last that long with this charade anyway." Snape countered.

"Well I think you'll crack sooner. Especially since the others don't know it's fake. Do you think you can handle spending time with the four of us on a regular basis?"

"You know I would rather pull my own eyes out. But, you seem to be handling this worse than me. If I can torment you just a little longer, I don't see a problem in this. Though same stakes, no funny business."

"No cheating got it." Potter nodded.

"I meant no intimacy. I'm not doing anything to you, lets make that clear."

Potter gagged. "Like I'd want that. And if I needed that sort of thing, I could get it from any girl in school."

"I don't think Lily would want to be with a philanderer though," Snape responded.

Potter frowned. "Good point. I can wait."

"Well that's settled. Do we have to do any established displays of affection?" asked Snape.

"I'd expect you to come to my Quidditch matches, sit on my side, but nothing too spectacular." Potter replied, running his hand through his hair.

"I could do that. When do you want me to send back this dress?"

Potter blinked. "Oh, you can keep it. It's custom made after all, I can't exactly return it."

Snape shuffled uncomfortably. "Oh, um thank you."

"It was nothing," replied Potter. "Really."

As they went their separate ways, Snape was thinking of new ways to torment Potter in her new role.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera comes to a tentative understanding with the Marauders

Snape wasn't contact with anyone until term began. While she enjoyed the silence of the castle and the emptiness of the dungeons during the holidays, she could spend time meditating, brewing, and troubleshooting new spells. She'd conjured some rabbits to test her latest curses on, and took notes for each reaction.

As she turned the rabbits back into objects, she imagined the pain on Mulciber, or Rosier, or anyone that stood in her way. For some reason she hadn't thought about Potter, but perhaps that was a lapse of judgement.

Maybe Black was still fair game.

She scribbled in her notes: test Sectumsepra, test countercurse.

Currently, the counter seemed to fail with messy results.

Soon enough, term began. Whatever interest the student body had in her relationship had died down, and for the most part things were back to normal. Lily had resumed their study sessions, and Potter kept his distance.

He still sat next to her occasionally in class, much to her annoyance. But they had the perfect excuse to blast each other to smithereens for their Defence practicals.

The rest of the Marauders, however, did not seem to take this change lightly. While Potter was not flaunting his attachment to Snape, the very idea it was still present and festering was an affront to their identity.

Snape noticed little things missing from her school bag. Quills were replaced with broken nibs, her ink was charmed to turn invisible, or it was charmed to add typos.

Then, there were increasingly inconvenient problems. One day it seems her shoes started tap dancing of their own accord while she was walking to Charms, or a bucket of cold soup floating on top of her and it's contents falling directly below her. Afterwards, her essay flew out of her hands and floated about the room while she had to run around the classroom trying to catch the scroll.

Initially she had decided to ignore it, she had bigger problems now than dealing with their nonsense. That is, until she had returned from dinner to find her schoolbag wiggling on its own.

Slowly, Snape opened the knapsack, checking to see if it was enchanted. When she found it was not, she looked down to find a plump little rat rummaging through her papers.

Without thinking, she stunned it and dropped it out of her bag. What a juvenile trick, did they think she'd be scared of a pest?

She placed it in one of her sample jars and poked air holes in the lid. It was a bit of a squeeze, but maybe she could use it for potions ingredients.

It aggressively tapped the glass and screeched. Oh, this one is going for spell testing first.

She placed the jar back in her bag and headed down to her annex. She locked the door and opened the jar, stunning the animal before it could scurry away.

Snape immobilized the animal and revived it, enjoying as it wriggled helplessly. Pointing her wand, she decided to start small and work her way up to Sectumsepmra.

"Concutere," she murmured as the magical force of the spell violently shook the subject, leading to bruising and increased squeaking. Good.

When she felt had her fun, it was time to cast the curse.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Snape looked up from her test subject, lowering her wand in confusion. No one knew of her brewing annex, besides Mulciber but he had no reason to visit any more. The knock became louder and more aggressive. Grumbling, she put away her wand and opened the door to find Black and Lupin barge in with panic stricken looks on their faces.

"Where is he?" Black shouted.

"Who?" asked Snape wearily.

"He's on the table," Lupin notes before grabbing the rodent and cradling it in his arms.

Black stroked its fur and gently rubbed behind its ears. "You're safe now, mate. She didn't hurt you did she?"

The rat squeaked angrily, crawling out of Lupin's arms and jumping onto Black's shoulder.

"Oof, we need to start putting you on a diet, another jump like that and you'll pop out my shoulder."

"Sirius," Lupin chided.

Black nodded. "Right." He turned to Snape. "What do you think you were doing? You could have killed him!"

"What's it to you, it's just a rat." Snape asked, eyebrow raised, her frown deepening.

"Oh. You didn't know?" Black asked. He and Lupin exchanged nervous glances. "He's my pet."

"You're too rich to have a pet rat." Snape stated plainly.

"I like taking in strays. And I'd say he has character." Black boasted. The rat scurried up to his neck and nudged his face. "You too," he replied, giving it a grin.

"Where's your friend, the other one?" Snape asked. By now she knew something was up.

"He's back in our room, sleeping." Lupin answered, maybe a little too quickly.

"Hmm." replied Snape. "So that's him, isn't it?"

"Honestly, Snape, we haven't the foggiest what you're talking about." Black replied nonchalantly.

"Most animals won't focus on one person so intently without some form of stimuli. I'm not holding any food, I'm not threatening it. And it's actively listening in this discussion." Snape deduced.

"Rats are highly intelligent creatures," Lupin began to argue. "In fact…"

"Come off it," Snape replied a angrily. "You know I know, well I didn't know there were more of you, I thought it was just Potter."

Black looked furious. "Did he tell you?"

"No," Snape replied impatiently. "And you know he wouldn't do that. I figured it out on my own."

Black's face twisted in rage before letting out a sigh. "Ok Pete, just transform back."

Instantly, the rat transformed back into a pudgy young man.

"Why were you rifling through my things?" Snape asked Pettigrew directly, stating him in the eyes.

Pettigrew answered quietly, "We were hoping to find some evidence, anything that could explain why you're with James. Blackmail, threats,"

"Or if we couldn't find that, something that could get you two to break up, or provide grounds for expulsion, we're not too picky," Black added nastily.

Snape gave a weak, twisted grin. "Amateurs. I wouldn't keep that in my schoolbag."

"Excuse me? Amateurs? Have you seen the work we've done?" Black asked rhetorically, though his anger seemed to have subsided.

"Were you willing to let Pettigrew here die in order to save Potter some time in Azkaban?" Snape asked casually. "Because if I hadn't enjoyed watching him suffer, I would have killed him much sooner. I didn't know he was a student. I'd be blameless."

Pettigrew's eyes widened and he stammered, "I knew they were coming for me. I trust them."

"But they didn't come for you fast enough, and they let you put yourself in a vulnerable position in the first place" Snape prodded. Pettigrew was shaking, and she could see the doubt in his eyes.

"Alright Snape, that's enough," Lupin scolded. He grabbed Pettigrew's wrist and let him hide behind the two of them. "We're leaving now, and if I hear you tell anyone about this, I'll report to McGonagall for practicing what looks like Dark curses on animals.

"Your threats don't scare me, Lupin. I know you're just a lapdog, you have no real power." Snape replied icily. "Just go."

For once, Lupin looked like he was about to lose his composure, his face was turning red.

"She's right Moony," Black added. "Let's go."

Snape thought that was the end of that until the next day. She was meditating in the annex, trying to clear her mind and continue her Occulmency training when she heard a loud banging at the door.

"Come on, Snape open up, I know you're in there," Potter demanded.

She let them wait twenty seconds, then got up to open the door. The four of them barged in, though everyone except Potter looked reluctant to be there.

"Right, we can't go on like this anymore. I think it's high time we sorted out our grievances." Potter exclaimed.

"I didn't invite them in here, they can leave." Snape replied dismissively.

"This is exactly my point, Snape." Potter glared.

"Why do we even need to be discussing anything?" Black asked angrily. "She tortured Peter!"

"Is that true?" Potter asked, making direct eye contact.

"Don't be so dramatic, it wasn't torture exactly, maybe mild discomfort on his part. And in my defence, I didn't know he was an Animagus." Snape scoffed. "And they were trying to spy on me."

"It still hurt," complained Pettigrew.

Potter looked at her intently, waiting for her to respond.

"Fine. I'm sorry I hurt you," Snape muttered half-heartedly.

"I know you don't mean it, but I accept you apology anyway," Pettigrew replied.

"Don't test my patience."

"And are you going to apologize for insulting Remus?" asked Black, anger still present in his voice.

"Are you lot going to apologize for your little pranks?" Snape responded.

"Wait, have you been pranking her?" Potter asked, "I thought I told all of you to lay off for a while."

"It wasn't anything too bad, Prongs. We were just having fun, which you seem to be incapable of these days." Black replied moodily.

"It's not about the scale of the pranks Padfoot, it's the principle. She's still my girlfriend, and it kind of hurts that all of you are going behind my back to do this." Potter said.

"I don't need you to defend me," Snape interrupted.

"Shut up." Potter dismissed. Snape fumed silently.

"You didn't have to choose her you know," Black added. "You could have gone with literally anyone, dated a mermaid for all I care and it still would have been a better choice."

"But I didn't. And I shouldn't have to justify my actions to you. If Vera keeps to herself and we don't antagonize her, then we don't have to have these problems." Potter urged.

"Maybe we should go," Lupin interceded. "We can continue this back in our room."

"I just don't get it," shouted Black. "How can you trust her? Are you blind? She's torturing animals, using Dark magic, and just being a bitch in general. You think a good friend should support your decisions, but I think a better friend would tell you you're making a terrible mistake."

"But it's my mistake to make," Potter replied firmly. He turned to Snape. "You should still apologize to Remus though."

"Will he apologize for trying to eat me?" Snape

countered.

"You don't have to apologize for anything Moony. She shouldn't guilt you over something you can't control." Black glared.

Lupin sighed, placing his hand on Black's shoulder. "Sirius, I appreciate the gesture, but you don't have to speak for me. We were in the wrong, I should have stayed in the Shack. I'm sorry Vera."

"Don't call me that," Snape frowned.

"Well however you want me to address you, I am truly sorry." Lupin responded, looking so tired. It was almost pathetic how rest of the month he looked like a husk of a man, hollow with such rounded eyes.

"And...I apologize for what I said earlier. I lashed out, and that wasn't fair." Snape replied. She didn't think she meant it. She still hated Lupin, and to some extent feared him. After seeing him transformed, she knew she was never going to see him as anything other than that creature. She'd just have to hide it better.

"And you aren't going to torture any more animals are you?" Potter asked.

"Are you suggesting I take up human test subjects?" Snape asked bitterly. She already knew where he was going with this.

Potter paled at the thought. "No. I was hoping you'd stop."

Snape frowned. All those months of work for nothing. She looked at the faces of the four boys in front of her, each looking so angry and distrustful, and for the first time she noticed they weren't entirely focused on her. Perhaps she wouldn't need to go about getting revenge on the Marauders, they were destroying themselves.

"Alright," she agreed. "I'll give up the spell testing, but I'm still brewing. And if I don't have any test subjects, we could make this interesting. Sparring. Less controlled than Wizard's Duels, more organized than hexing you in a hallway. We meet here, we fight. Sounds good?"

Black snorted. "How do we know you won't cheat?"

"Oh I will be. Feel free to as well. No maiming though, otherwise you won't be able to coast on your looks. Well, maybe not Pettigrew."

"Hey," Pettigrew yelled. "What was that for? I didn't even do anything."

"Exactly. You've been here this whole time, and you just sort of stood there, observing." Snape noted. "Are you going to fight?"

Pettigrew's eyes narrowed. "You're on."

"Atta boy Pete!" Black whooped.

"Are we doing this now?" Snape asked.

"How about we start with one and go from there," Potter suggested.

"Sounds good." Snape covered up any ongoing potions and dismantled her workstation, leaving the room bare.

"Alright, you stand there Pettigrew." Snape commanded.

Nervously, he moved to the center of the room, and Snape stood in front of him. "Ready?"

He nodded, and she began casting hexes. She let out a volley, which Pettigrew blocked.

No spells back in her direction though.

She kept casting, but it was just continued blocking.

Eventually, Snape became annoyed.

"Do something!" She shouted. "Fight like a man already!"

In her frustration, she lost form and she could hear a quiet Disarming Charm from Pettigrew's direction.

As her wand flew out of her hand. She screamed in frustration.

"Well it looks like he won this round," Black sneered.

Snape picked up her wand. "Rematch," she demanded.

"Maybe we should continue this later." Potter intervened.

Snape took a moment to catch her breath. She had used up so much energy in her rage she was feeling the exhaustion get to her. "Very well, and I expect to face all of you soon."

She turned to Pettigrew, "You might have gotten out of this because of dumb luck, but you can't expect to use the Rope-a-dope in every circumstance. It'll be the easiest way to die."

"I'll just have to wait for my luck to run out then," Pettigrew replied, out of breath.

The other three laughed at that. Snape sighed and opened the door. "Get out. We're done here."

As they left, Potter took her aside. "Hey, are you alright?"

"What do you think?" Snape grumbled. "I can't believe I lost to that fat idiot."

"Oi, that fat idiot's my friend," Potter replied indignantly.

Snape rolled her eyes. "Just because he's your friend doesn't make it any less true."

"But are we ok here?" Potter asked, "I really do want us to be able to patch things up and move forward."

"Us as in you and me, or us as in having me bow down to you four." Snape ribbed.

"I wouldn't say bow down, and I know it's been difficult getting the guys to lay off, but I'll keep working on it if you just…"

"Stop being myself?"

"No, of course not. But you can't just be about Dark Magic, right?" Potter asked, his eyes searching for any sympathy. There was none.

"Should I take up knitting then?" Snape jeered. "Make my darling little James a jumper?"

"You know what I mean. Or maybe you don't. Merlin, Lily must have had the endurance of Prometheus with you."

"Don't bring her name into this," Snape hissed. "Well why don't you leave?"

Potter paused. "I don't know. This has been difficult, but despite everything this has been kind of fun hasn't it?"

"You have a bizarre definition of fun," Snape muttered.

"Very well then, don't give up Dark Magic if you think that's the only facet of your identity, but I know there's more to you then that." Potter responded. "Just what's your goal with it? Is it just to make people suffer?"

Snape paused. Really, she had latched onto Dark Magic as a way to make people respect her by fearing her. If others were afraid of her, they wouldn't think of hurting her. Plus, it did feel good. The magic had a heady, rich feeling coursing through one's veins- like drinking too much red wine. (She had tried a glass once at home, it wasn't the same of course- magic was stronger).

"You wouldn't understand," Snape dismissed.

Potter smiled weakly, "Try me."


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lily discusses her ideas on feminism. Also she is far too observant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry for the delay. This is kind of a filler chapter with some character moments. I feel like the story has been kind of lacking Lily’s presence, so this is a scene of their friendship shifting as they are adjusting to their new dynamic.

Snape and Lily had mostly patched things up. In fact, they were at a level of closeness she hadn’t felt since Second Year, before she had intensified her animosity with the Marauders and Lily had a chance to gain better friends. 

They were sitting in the courtyard on a weekend discussing the actions of the Minister’s cabinet in the latest vote on Squib rights. 

“I certainly can’t fault the Minister for trying to implement new measures, but it seems that people are more focused on the economy than anything else, and they don’t realize we don’t have a self-sufficient system. Most of our food-based agriculture is either imported or produced by Muggles! I doubt the Supremacists think about that!” Lily noted with a hint of irony in her voice. 

“I think most of her detractors think she’s looking at the issue too emotionally, and she’s letting her feelings get in the way of passing reasonable measures in order to steamroll radical changes,” Snape reasoned.

Lily looked at Snape and rolled her eyes. “Have you noticed most of those arguments are very gendered or use very coded language. They wouldn’t say any of that if she were male. You know, it’s very strange how they always go on about how there’s greater gender equality in the Wizarding World, how magic’s the great equalizer in terms of gender dynamics, but some of our classmates are currently betrothed. I heard the other day in our Prefects meeting one of the girls in our year is thinking of skipping OWLS to get married.”

Snape remembered that Aoife had giggled in excitement when she received a letter of intent to start a courtship with someone her parents had set up for her, a second cousin of some sort that was also in the Twenty-Eight. It seems whatever attachment she had with Mulciber was short-lived once she found someone wealthier. Soon after she received a rather ugly looking bracelet that she was oh so subtly waving around for anyone to see. That was the first step, which would soon be followed by some supervised meetings, and then an engagement party.

“Well it’s their culture Lily, we can’t really judge what they want. And isn’t it the goal of all feminists to let women choose how they want to live their lives?” Snape asked rhetorically.

“But we don’t know if they want it, or if it’s just part of the social pressure to get married.” Lily protested.

“Obviously, there are exceptions, but I know for a fact Aoife is ecstatic to marry Mr. Goyle, and I pray to Circe she stays that way. And anyway, it’s not like getting married stops them from having a career. They can always go and take the OWLS later, but it’s not like they’ll need them anyway in their line of work.” Snape snarked.

“Housewives?” Lily mused.

“Socialites. It’s still a very high-pressure career, though she’s probably not going to be a politician’s wife with her choice of husband. I heard his mother was a troll.”

“No!” Lily gasped, scandalized. She playfully slapped Snape’s arm and she couldn’t help but grin.

“I swear! I heard a lot of the Twenty-Eight have some creature blood lingering in the recessive genes.”

“Look at you Vera, you’re turning into a gossip like them,” Lily teased playfully, causing Snape to frown.

“I’m nothing like them.” Snape protested.

“You’re right, you aren’t.” Lily acquiesced. “Still, it’s a bit barbaric don’t you think? I mean, they go on about how Muggles are so backward, but at least you and I aren’t singing _Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match! Find me a find, catch me a catch!_ ”

“It’s not like we would have been doing that in the Muggle world either. We have no religious reasons to and no offense, but we weren’t really from the sort of background that needed an arranged marriage.” Snape countered.

Lily shrugged. “Fair enough, and I have no shame in that. My grandparents were coal-miners, and my father was the first in the family to move out of Wales. If I was in my ancestor’s shoes, I’d probably be resigned with my lot.”

“Dad never spoke much about his family, but I assumed they were mill workers too.” Snape replied.

“And none of them ever even considered their grand-daughters would be sitting here, at Hogwarts, studying magic.” Lily gestured to the surroundings in the courtyard as a ghost idly floated by. A group of students were playing gobstones a few meters away. It seems one of them was losing badly as his stone started spouting ink in his face.

“I doubt they’d have considered us going to any sort of school as posh as Hogwarts, let alone for magic.” Snape replied, folding her legs into her chest. 

“And maybe that’s our advantage, we certainly don’t have the pressure that other witches have, we can choose to be what we want.” Lily mused. 

“What do you want Lily?” Snape asked curiously. They had always talked about their futures, but it never seemed like something that would happen so soon. And the closer they were to reaching the end of their schooling, the more Snape realized they might not have the same plans anymore. 

Lily paused, idly playing with a strand of hair. She was silent for a moment before turning to Snape. “Do you remember when we were little and saw Georgy Girl on the telly? I thought it was so glamorous how she lived in a flat in London with her friend and had all these adventures.” 

Snape furrowed her brows. “That was a terrible film, Lily.”

“Oh, it was, absolute trash,” Lily agreed. “But I did always want to move to London ever since. It certainly helps that the Ministry is there.”

“So, government work then?”

“I was thinking more along the lines of Potions testing, working in the departments that verify new potions for safety and trying them out myself, maybe reverse-engineering them.” Lily replied.

“Lily you’re too good for that. You should be a Potioneer.” Snape urged.

Lily rolled her eyes. “I appreciate the vote of confidence, but I think it’s good to start small. But the point is, I’d be living in London, sharing a flat with my friend, living the dream.”

“You’ve already talked about it with McKinnon?” Snape asked idly, hoping to switch the subject soon to something else.

“No, Vera I was hoping we could move in together. You know, if things don’t work out with you and James.” Lily looked sheepish. “I mean, what do you think? It’s just a tentative idea.”

“I think it’s fantastic.” Snape replied quickly. “And James will be well out of the picture by then.”

Lily looked pensive. “Why is that? Things not working out between you two?”

“That’s putting it mildly.” Snape snorted. “But really James and I weren’t ever going to be long-term anyway.”

“Well that’s a pity, you could have been like Charlotte Rampling’s character.” Lily joked. “She was so glamorous.”

“Somehow I feel like that’s an insult.” Snape teased back remembering the tumultuous relationship between her character and her husband. 

“Of course not, being compared to Charlotte Rampling is never an insult. And I supposed James has that sort of Alan Bates charm.” Lily added casually.

“I don’t see it. But feel free to take him off my hands like in the movie.” Snape retorted.

“Vera! I would never do that.” Lily replied a little too seriously.

“Relax Lily, I know you’re too good to be anything like poor Georgy Girl.” Snape teased.

“Oh? You don’t think I could be the mistress of a wealthy older man?” Lily joked, adding a dramatic flair of her arms.

“Honestly, you don’t have the stomach for it.” 

Lily stuck out her tongue. “Well don’t expect me to raise your children then.” 

Snape looked at her skeptically. “Like I’d ever have children.”

“Vera, I have been meaning to ask you though. How are things with James? He’s not treating you badly is he?”

“No, he’s not,” Snape replied, lips pursed. She really didn’t like what Lily was implying. 

“It’s just that it is a little odd, how you two got together after he was so horrid to you.” 

“I gave it back at him too, I’m not a victim.” Snape replied firmly.

“That’s not what I meant,” Lily replied defensively. “I don’t know how to say this, because you are my best friend, and I don’t want to come off as selfish, but it just seems so strange, how he suddenly switched his attention from me to you. I don’t want to come off as conceited, and please don’t get cross with me, but I think he might be using you Vera. I think he’s been trying to make me jealous.” Lily anxiously chewed on her lower lip, evidently looking very upset.

She continued. “I hope it’s not the case, because frankly I think it would be vile for him to play with your emotions. I could be wrong. Still, I can’t shake off the feeling that something isn’t right.”

Vera raised her eyebrows and slid her legs from her grip, letting them lie flat on the stone floor of the courtyard again. She smoothed out her robes and thought for a moment. It seems Lily had caught on faster than either of them had suspected. She could in this moment tell Lily the truth and permanently alienate her from James, eventually keeping her all to herself. Of course, she might never earn her love in the way she wanted, but it would be satisfactory enough knowing James would never have it.

“If that is the case Lily, he’s not doing a very good job at it, I feel like I am using him more often than not.” Snape began

“You mean socially? So, it’s not entirely romantic then.” Lily frowned.

“Well, James is helping me out of a bit of a situation. I ran into some trouble with the boys in my year, and I needed an alliance of sorts. It’s funny how being romantically involved with someone gives you greater protection socially, even if you’re able to outduel most of them.” Snape scowled at the unfortunate double standards of the matter.

“What kind of a situation?” Lily asked.

“It’s not important,” Snape waved away. “The point is that since we were involved, this alliance grants me implicit protection, but if he is trying to make you jealous, then it would explain why he was willing to help me. I mean, no one does anything just because.”

“But you said yourself he’s helping you. What happened there anyway, I thought you were on good terms with the boys in your year. Couldn’t you have a word with Mulciber?”

“It’s none of your business Lily.” Snape replied sharply. She grabbed the fabric of her robes tightly and glared at her. She took a deep breath and apologized. “I’m sorry, but yes, there might be something there, I certainly wouldn’t know. He’s been a mediocre boyfriend though, so I don’t think you’re missing much.”

Lily quietly studied her friend before her face shifted, a realization dawning on her. Perhaps she was coming to her senses.

“Oh. I suppose it has something to do with Mulciber, doesn’t it? That bastard.” Lily swore.

Snape paled. That was not the conclusion she wanted her to come to. At all.

Lily whispered, “You know Vera, if something happened to you, you could tell me.” 

Snape felt shame, then anger. Was there some sign on her telling everyone she was damaged? How dare she assume she could just broach that subject. She wasn’t even ready to think about it on her own terms. 

“I have no idea what you mean. I think it’s getting late, Lily. I’m going to go back to my Common Room.”

“Vera, what’s wrong? Please don’t push me out.” Lily begged. Snape ignored her and picked up her bag, rushing back inside the castle. 

As Snape headed down the stairs, she heard footsteps following her. Instinctively, she unleashed her wand and readied herself in a dueling stance, only to see Lily had followed her. Reluctantly, she lowered her wand. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“You don’t have to.” Lily walked over to her and reached out to hug her. Snape flinched. 

“Oh Vera, you aren’t alone. I wish we hadn’t had this horrid fight.” Lily replied in frustration. 

Snape tried to change the subject. “Well it’s all in the past now,” she replied tersely. 

“But I’ll never be able to live with myself. I was there for Mary, but I completely rejected you when you needed me.” 

“It wasn’t like that, you’re overreacting.” Snape replied dismissively. “And it doesn’t bother me, you know I’m stronger than that.” 

She still felt anxious around her classmates, especially men. But she attributed that to nerves. She hadn’t bothered masturbating either since it happened. But she felt like she was beyond base physical pleasure anyway.

Lily looked at her with worry and grabbed her hand tightly. Snape blushed, feeling terrified yet excited. She could feel her pulse quicken and hear the blood pounding in her head and Lily’s fingers brushed around her sweaty palm. Lily’s green eyes met her own, and she could feel Lily’s magical energy bearing down on her. It was a smothering sense of love, heavy and oppressive like a heat wave. Snape wanted to let go, she didn’t feel like she deserved it. 

Lily murmured, “Vera, when you’re ready, please talk to me. I love you. Of course, I’ll give you space, but I will always be there for you.” 

Snape felt herself shaking. She wanted to bask in this moment, but the more she felt Lily’s love, the more it terrified her. She felt sick.

She let go. “I wish I had something clever to say.” Snape replied nervously.

“You don’t have to say anything.” Lily answered. “And for once, you don’t need to be so clever all the time,” she teased. 

“I love you too, Lily.” Snape replied dumbfounded.

Lily smiled and let out a soft laugh. “You are my dearest friend, Vera. Sometimes I’m overwhelmed by how close I feel to you, almost as if we are one. Where are you going?”

Snape couldn’t take it anymore. She had to find somewhere to be alone.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera has a heart to heart with an unlikely person

Snape ran to her bed and spent the rest of the evening hiding under her sheets. She was mortified that Lily surmised what she considered one of the worst experiences of her life, and had the gall to spout all that love and acceptance nonsense.

She punched her pillow until the feathers started to come out. 

She woke up early in the morning to find some objects to enchant. She turned them into mice and finally tested Sectumsepra. It was glorious. 

She thought the matter had been settled. While she hadn’t bothered telling James that Lily knew their relationship was a farce (she knew she’d have to explain how that happened), Lily was nice enough to play along.

James wasn’t as obnoxious as before. Instead, he made the time to walk with her to class, or he would sit with her in the library and they would exchange notes. Snape would invite Lily to study with them, and she was unusually quiet. Usually, Lily tended to prattle about the subject at hand, but she seemed to hardly look at her book at all. She would just sit and observe. 

Occasionally, James’s friends would stop by to say hello and Snape couldn’t help but smile as she saw a poorly hidden scrape, or a black eye. She was still meeting the Marauders on a weekly basis to spar, and while she was getting a decent fight from them for the most part, she enjoyed the times when she could trounce them. 

Her proudest moment was when Black conceded the fight, asking how she had modified a Sheild Charm. Initially, she refused to give away her secrets. It didn’t take long for one of them to try to reverse engineer the spell, so she decided it might be better to show them to prevent any potentially fatal accidents. Much to her surprise, they were more competent at Spellcrafting than they let on, and while she’d never admit it, she learned a few defensive spells from them as well.

Mostly, things had settled into a new normal with an uneasy truce. No one discussed their discomfort at the arrangement, and everyone pretended that they got along. 

So when Mary MacDonald showed up to ask if Snape wanted to take a walk with her by the Lake, she really was taken aback.

“Did Lily put you up to this?” Snape asked, but Mary’s grimace seemed to be enough of an answer

“You think she’d mind her own business.” Snape muttered. “All right, let’s go.”

They paced silently for a while, trying to think of what to say.

“You know, Lily might have suggested we have a chat, but I wanted to talk to you,” Mary spluttered.

Snake glared at her. “Why? I don’t think it benefits either of us. You and I have nothing in common otherwise, and I don’t think this thing should be some sort of bonding activity,” she spat.

“This isn’t easy for me either, Snape. I don’t want to be known as that girl. And despite Lily’s best intentions, I think her efforts to help me made more people aware of what happened to me than I’m comfortable with. I mean, I’d have preferred it if you hadn’t known, no offense. But it happened. And no one else is going to really understand what we felt.” Mary put her hands in the pockets of her robes and shivered. 

The wind was buffeting across the lake, causing the frost to land on their faces. The weather was in its transitional state, alternating between snow and rain. At the moment, the snow had turned to sludge as the trudged through the lakeside. 

Snape closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying to center herself. She exhaled. 

“Did he put you under?” Snape asked. “He did that to me.”

“Yes,” Mary confirmed. “I never knew the Imperius felt so well, like it did. I thought it would be more painful.”

“It helps lull the intended target to they don’t try to break it.” Snape explained. Mary nodded.

“You were always so clever Severa, you know so much about defense.” Mary commented. It seemed more like a complaint than a compliment. Snape tried to outpace her, but Mary slowly jogged along to catch up, huffing slightly.

“Fat lot of good it did for me. I knew my theory well, but I wasn’t able to fight it off either. I prided myself on that. I might not have looks, or friends, but I had my cleverness and my magic. If I couldn’t fight off the Imperius, then what do I have?” Snape wondered.

“Stop that,” Mary replied fiercely. “You have plenty of things to be proud of. And many trained wizards can’t fight it off. That’s why it’s an Unforgivable in the first place.”

Snape stopped pacing and Mary finally caught up. She turned to face her, and stared into Mary’s eyes. She resisted the urge to look through her thoughts. It would have been helpful to find a motive for why she was trying to act so sympathetic, but there was no point. Snape was at her wits’ end and feeling exhausted. 

“He told me you enjoyed it,” Snape replied offhandedly, disarming the other girl.

“He said that?” Mary muttered, horrified.

“I didn’t believe it. I think he used it as a tactic to upset me. It didn’t work.” Snape replied. She assessed the other girl, trying to find out her angle. Was she trying to get her to humiliate herself?

“I...reacted that’s true. But I hated it. It felt wrong, like my body had betrayed me.” Mary replied, hiding her head in her hand. Her voice was shaking.

Snape frowned. She wanted to hate Mary for making her talk about this. Despite herself, she was feeling sorry for the other girl.

“Have you tried blocking your emotions? It’s a good first step towards Occulmency.”

“Occulmency?” Mary asked curiously. “Isn’t it rather difficult?”

Snape nodded. “Extremely. I’m not going to lie, most people are unable to learn it, but the basics are simple enough. And when you feel that you have control of your mind, you have control of your body. It’s actually quite liberating,” she admitted.

Mary’s eyes widened. “Could you show me?”

Snape gave her an appraising look. “No, I’m afraid I can’t. But you could take a look at The Mind and The Matter, it’s a good primer for laymen. It’s guided exercises, meditation. It’s mostly useless, but there’s some good points for beginners. If you can handle that, maybe we can talk about it another time.”

“I’ll definitely take a look,” Mary replied excitedly. She grinned, “You know Vera, maybe Lily was right about you, you really aren’t that bad once you open up.”

Snape gave her a withering glare. “I’d prefer not to be called Vera, and I hope you don’t make me regret this conversation.”

Mary gave some half-hearted goodbyes and left Snape to her own devices. Idly, she kicked some stones into the lake and wondered if she was allowing herself to become weak. She’d have to work on that somehow.

As Winter turned to Spring, the students were increasing in their frenzy as it was closer to exams.

While Snape wasn’t the type to turn herself into a nervous wreck over OWLS, she had increased her study schedule, barely taking the time to talk to her acquaintances in Slytherin. It seems spending time with Lily and having a fake boyfriend was a full time occupation.

“Study any more and you’ll be cross-eyed, I swear.”

Snake looked up from her textbook and sighed. It seemed she had to humor Regulus again.

“You’ll understand next year, and I’m sure you certainly won’t be as charitable as I am.” 

It was once again breakfast. Why did Regulus have to ruin breakfast of all meals? She flipped at page and took a bite of toast, ignoring him.

He sat down next to her, and seemed to enjoy the sight of her ever-deepening scowl. 

“Have any plans for the summer?” 

“Yes, the family and I are visiting our villa in Biarritz,” Snape replied sarcastically.

“Splendid! I love Biarritz. Great place for surfing,” Regulus replied, grinning.

“Your point, Black?” Snape asked.

“Oh, it’s just Black now? Well I hope you aren’t going to spend the whole holiday getting a tan, Mother says they are for the Nouveau Riche. Stay a while on our sceptered isle.”

Snape raised her eyebrow. “Where did you learn that phrase?”

“I’ve heard of Shakespeare, Vera.”

“Not you too. One more person calls me that and I’ll throw this book at them.”

“You wouldn’t. And I think it’s only fair that I get to call you by your vulgar Muggle diminutive if my brother gets to.” 

“For the record, he doesn’t.”

“No, you let him call you worse you minx.” He winked and she did throw her book at him. He cast a quick Immobulus. 

Regulus laughed and looked over at the Gryffindor table, which seemed to take no notice. “Careful Vera, you don’t want to make your beloved jealous. And if you abuse me so, I might rescind my invitation.”

Snape cast an Accio to retrieve her book. “An invitation to what exactly?”

“Mother’s insisting on hosting the bridal shower for Aoife Rosier and she wants me to attend. Since you’re her classmate, I’ve convinced her to add you to the guest list.” Regulus explained.

Snape frowned. “Why? What’s in it for you?”

Regulus picked her toast off her plate and started eating it. She glared at him. 

“It’s not like you were going to eat it,” he responded. “Maybe I’m asking you because I enjoy your company?”

Snape gave him a skeptical look.

“And maybe my brother’s been forced to attend too and I know he’ll try to pick a fight with you if you show up.” Regulus replied.

“Then what makes you think I’ll go?” Snape asked.

“Because you’d want to do the same, and the ensuing chaos would make the whole social season worthwhile.” Regulus exclaimed triumphantly.

“As tempting an offer as it is, I’d have no way of getting to London.” Snape replied coldly.

“I forgot to you lived in the middle of nowhere. Leave that to me. So are you going?”

“Can I bring Potter?” Snape asked, hoping the idea would rescind her invitation.

“If you can convince him to go, which I doubt you could.”

Snape scowled, and returned to her textbook, abruptly ending the topic. She still had so much to review for Transfiguration of elemental states.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera rides the train home. She also attends the engagement party

Snape endured a thoroughly unimpressive end of term. She found her OWLS to be quite simple and took the most pride in impressing her proctor for the Defense exam. 

As she packed, she took notice of the items that she had acquired throughout the year. There were a few stray pieces of underwear from her break-in to the boys’ dorms, an elemental sphere that must have fallen out of the bag, some dried fluxweed, and her dress robes. She idly ran her hands over the fabric and watched as it glided back into the trunk. 

“I hear you are coming to my bridal shower, Severa.” Aoife called from the other end of the room. She had already packed, her area of the dormitory completely bare. 

Snape tensed, but tried to feign a smile. “I wouldn’t miss it. We must to stick together, mustn’t we?”

Aoife gave her a mysterious grin and sauntered over her and placed her arms around her in a hug. Snape stiffened, preparing for an attack. It never came. 

“Don’t embarrass me,” Aoife whispered threateningly. 

“Is that how you talk to an old friend, dear?” Snape replied with friendly malice. Aoife’s grip tightened like a python.

“I think it’s wonderful, all of us together,” interrupted Honoria. “Aoife’s the first of us to get married, but I’d imagine we’ll be at each other’s weddings soon enough.”

“Who knows, maybe Snape’s next,” taunted Niobe. The girls laughed, and Snape scowled, wishing she could go back to the old days when she could hex them without repercussion. 

As Snape boarded the train, she paced through the aisles, looking for the compartment Lily was sitting in. She had yet to find her but ran into the Marauders on her way over.

“Oh, hello Vera. Did you want to join us?” asked James. “I’m afraid we’re a bit full, you might have to try somewhere else,” he replied nastily, causing the others to snicker.

“Congratulations Potter, you are free from your romantic shackles. Have you seen Lily?”

“No, but if you do, can you tell her I’d like to have a word with her?”

“Deliver your own propositions, I’m not your messenger.” Snape quipped. “Black, I’ll be seeing you this summer. I’m invited to the Rosier bridal shower.”

Sirius raised an eyebrow. “Oh? How’d you get an invitation to that?”

“Apparently, I can bring a companion. I’d ask you James, but I think it won’t be your scene.” Snape taunted.

James turned to Sirius. “We could use this, you always tell me how you hate going to those things alone.”

Sirius frowned. “I don’t know Prongs, I’m on thin ice with my parents. I can’t try anything at one of Mother’s social engagements, it might be the end of me.” 

“Oh, come on Padfoot, where’s your sense of fun? Did you leave it back at school? If it goes south, you can stay with me for the rest of the holiday.” James urged.

“Well, this has been lovely, but I’m going to go find Lily before we reach the station,” Snape mumbled.

“Hang on Vera,” James called out. “Come in and stay for a moment. We might want to sort out the details.”

She took a look into the compartment and sighed. She pushed her trunk inside and floated it on top of the luggage rack. They weren’t exaggerating, it seems the compartments were getting smaller, or they were getting bigger. There was barely enough room on the benches for the four of them. At this rate, she’d have to sit on the floor.

“You could sit on my lap,” James suggested cheekily.

“Oh, shut up and move over.” She pushed him, so he was shoved by the window and sat between him and Sirius, much to his annoyance. Remus and Peter exchanged nervous glances, and Remus suggested a game of cards. 

As the train ride continued, James retrieved a notebook from his bag and he and Sirius started coming up with potential plans to ruin the party. Each prank seemed stupider than the last, and it seems that neither could agree on one. Much to her annoyance, James kept leaning over her, his presence much too close for comfort.

“So no to poisoning the cakes, and no to the screaming hors d’oeuvres.” James concluded.

“Kreacher would intercept either of those.” Sirius noted. “Really, Mother is pretty ironclad when it comes to these events. Nothing gets past her, believe me, I’ve tried.”

“We could go the old-fashioned way and have them turn on each other,” James suggested.

Sirius grinned. “Might work. But it’s not really our style is it?” 

Sirius frowned as he noticed James was very close to his former girlfriend, his knees brushing against hers, shoulder to shoulder. Sirius uncrossed his legs and tried to move over, increasing room on the bench for the three of them.

“Why’d you decide to tell us Snape? Why not use the element of surprise in your favor?” Sirius asked.

“Apparently your brother wanted to use our mutual hatred for each other for his own entertainment. If you can plan something to make him suffer I would appreciate it.” Snape replied.

“Really? How do you even know Regulus?” Sirius was genuinely surprised. 

“We are in the same House after all. Also, we might technically be accomplices.” 

“What are you dragging my brother into exactly?” Sirius asked aggressively.

“Nothing he wouldn’t have found himself in anyway. Did you know he likes to break other people’s limbs for fun?” Snape countered. 

“Actually, yes I did.” Sirius replied, lost in some reverie. Somehow Snape did not want to know the details. 

The door to the compartment slid open, and Lily popped her head through. “There you are Vera! I’ve been looking all over for you. Hello boys, mind if I join?”

“More the merrier,” Remus replied with a wry look. Lily shrank her trunk and placed it on top of Snape’s. There certainly wasn’t any room, but Remus shoved Peter to the window side and gave her extra space on the bench. Snape stared daggers at them both, and James looked equally upset, though he hid it much better. 

“I’m so glad the year’s over, I can’t wait to get home and get some rest!” Lily said happily. “As much as I love Hogwarts, it will be nice going back to the Muggle world for a bit.” 

“Must be strange, not being able to use magic for a few months,” James pondered aloud. 

Lily laughed. “I doubt you’d last in my house Potter. Not only do we not use magic, my sister and I have chores to tend to. You know, wash the car, scrub the floors, make dinner. My mother’s a taskmaster about making sure our rooms our spotless.” 

“Considering how many detentions we’ve had with Filch we’re all fairly proficient in that department,” remarked Sirius. 

“But it is nice having House Elves take care of that during the year,” agreed Remus. “Though we use magic in my house, so it’s not so bad.” 

“What about you, Snape? Anything you’re looking forward to when you get home?” asked Peter.

“No comment,” Snape replied. The less she thought about having to get in the middle of her parents’ rows, or having to collect her father from the bar, or watching her mother have another nervous breakdown, the better. 

“Of course, Vera will be staying with me most of the Summer,” Lily answered, giving her a smile. Snape felt as if she was melting, her face flushed. James frowned, shifting towards the window, his hand running through his hair in that annoying manner. 

“And you’re coming to visit my parents too.” James stated. Snape glared at him. 

“Why should I do that?” Snape asked. 

“They’ve been asking about you for ages. Ever since the Yule party really. Please come, they’ve been dying to meet you.” James urged mockingly.

“But there’s no need, we’re not an item anymore.” Snape replied. Lily raised her eyebrows. She turned over to Remus and asked, ‘since when,’ only for him to shrug in confusion.

“You’d be going as a friend, consider staying for a day or two and that’s it, then we’ll call it even. My mum was the one who chose those robes for you, she wants to see how they look.” James continued. Snape sighed.

“Alright, we’ll work out the details on that later. As for the engagement party, do you want to meet in the city?” 

“I’ll meet you at the house. I already know where it is.” James replied.

“What engagement party?” asked Lily

“It seems my mother is throwing a party for Aoife Rosier, and our dear Vera somehow got on the guest list.” Sirius drawled. He nudged her. “Hopefully you don’t make too much of a scene, I think she’s probably at her wits end having you step foot at all.”

The rest of the ride went quietly. Lily and James joined in on the card game, trading verbal parries and playfully arguing with each other. It seemed that they were enjoying themselves, somehow. Sirius pretended to take a nap, but he was watching them. Snape decided since she was trapped in her seat to focus on her meditating exercises. She had improved significantly this past year and found herself drifting. Sometimes, she could feel her consciousness dripping into other people’s minds. As she closed her eyes, she felt herself move between the minds of the others in her compartment.

She felt emotions as a brief flash before reaching deeper. 

Peter was bored with the game, bored at being ignored. He hated how he was just there, barely tolerated. He wondered if any of them would miss him over the holiday and hoped they would write. He hated having to see his mother wither away and hated how much she depended on him.

Remus was interested in the game, but he was more focused on the upcoming moon. He hoped his dad had kept the Charms on their basement up to date and that the chains hadn’t rusted too badly for them to have to purchase new ones. It was going to be strange coming home now that his mum had passed. 

Lily seemed to be enjoying herself. She was winning, and despite everything seemed to be taken with James’s smile of all things. She enjoyed how he would run his hands through his hair to make it messier, and found his laugh…endearing? She found his frustration at losing to be charming, and she felt a small rush of power at winning. She wanted him, but she didn’t want him if he was still with Vera.

James was giddy. He’d never been this close to Lily. He could practically smell her perfume. The further the game progressed, the closer he leaned over. He could see her body heave as she laughed, her eyes crinkled as she smiled. Her curly hair getting in the way as she tried to move tendrils of her layered haircut behind her ears and failing. He wanted to touch her hair, he wanted to kiss her. Their hands briefly touched, not for more than a second, and he felt he could explode. 

Sirius was a bit of a mystery. It seems he had been trained as well and he was able to block her out, but she was barely able to get some traces of emotion, flickers. He was upset, angry. It seems he was going to have to take up some of the family responsibilities soon now that he was considered old enough. But he was fifteen. He didn’t want to be taking up any of their ‘responsibilities’ if those included what he suspected. Who could he even tell? It’s not like James would understand, he was too busy getting caught up in his love life. Stupid, foolish, handsome easy-going James, oblivious to everything when it was right in front of him…

Snape paused. She felt herself being pushed out of his mind and left. The less anyone suspected she was invading their thoughts, the better. She wasn’t entirely sure of what to make of Sirius’s apparent affections for James. Had he told him? Honestly, it was none of her business. But Lily had been onto something all those months ago. Not that she had been able to see Snape’s own feelings. 

As the train reached the station, the grabbed their trunks and headed for the platform. 

“I’ll write to you about when you should visit,” James called out to Snape. “Oh, and bring Lily along, I’m sure she’d love a change of scene.”

“We’d be delighted!” Lily replied, waving back. She turned to Snape. “Are your parents picking you up? You can ride with us back home.” 

Snape knew her parents had forgotten, seeing as neither of them had shown up yet, so she gladly accepted. As Lily ran into her parents’ arms, her sister Petunia scowled from behind them. 

“I see you’ve brought your freak friend along. I hope she pays for petrol.” Petunia grumbled. 

“Oh, don’t be so miserly, Pet.” Lily’s mother admonished. “Come on Vera,” she urged, “We haven’t got all day. It’s going to be a four-hour drive.”  
The engagement party was later that month. Snape hadn’t bothered letting her parents know she was going, if her father had surmised he would have locked her things and trapped her in the house rather than attend some ‘Satanic devil worship party,’ as he would have called it.

He was out at the pub to watch to the football match, so her absence would be undetected most of the afternoon. Mother was in bed, lying listlessly and staring into space. Sometimes Mother would have those moments, just bouts of malaise where she wasn’t functional, and Snape had to take up the housekeeping. When she had arrived from the station, it seemed the place hadn’t had a go over in months. 

Snape had dressed and wrapped a cloak around her silk robes to hide them. She had tried to style her hair in a way that was almost presentable, but it still looked limp and greasy. She sighed, it was going to have to so. As she walked towards the stairs, she heard a weak voice calling from behind her. 

“Darling, where are you going?” Her mother rasped.

Sighing, Snape shouted, “Out. I’ll be back.” 

“Don’t you talk to me like that, come in and address me face to face,” he mother replied in clipped frustration.

Snape slinked into the room, her fury simmering. She just wanted to get her social obligation over with, so she could get home. 

Her mother eyed her suspiciously. “Where are you going dressed like that?” 

“A party.” Snape replied acidly. “I’m sure you wouldn’t be too familiar with those these days.”

Her mother didn’t react but frowned at her outfit. “Open your cloak, I want to see what you’re wearing.”

“It’s not important,” she protested. Her mother lifted her arm and the cloak opened on its own, revealing her green silk dress robes. 

“My, me. Aren’t we fine?” her mother taunted. “What did you have to do to get those? I hope it wasn’t anything too degrading.” 

Snape fumed, closing her coat. “I don’t know what you mean, these were a gift. And I didn’t have to do anything for them.”

“Nothing comes for free, darling,” her mother replied sadly. “And I know we never had this talk before, I thought you were smarter than to fall for this, but you need to be careful with those type of boys. They don’t marry girls like you.” 

Snape laughed derisively. “Oh, should I want to get married and end up like you? I’m going out. Tell Dad whatever you’d like, I’ll be back late.” 

Snape slammed the door and let out a huff of frustration. She took out the letter from her pocket, which enclosed a cheap copper ring. She had received a letter from Regulus which enclosed an unregistered Portkey inside. It was dangerous and highly illegal, but how else was she going to get to London with no money? She hoped Regulus was skilled enough to create one that didn’t turn her inside-out. Closing her eyes, she slipped it on.

As she felt the tug of the Portkey, she gasped. Suddenly, she opened her eyes and found herself in front of the old and weathered townhouse on Mayfair. Snape took a moment to compose herself and knocked on the door. An angry and aged House Elf answered.

“Kreacher not letting in Half-Blood social climber. Kreacher doesn’t care about guest list.” As he was about to slam the door, Regulus ran up to stop him.

“Kreacher, please let her in, she’s my guest.” Regulus commanded. Reluctantly, the House Elf complied, muttering under his breath. Regulus took her cloak and looked her over. 

“You’re wearing winter dress robes in June? Bold choice, Mother’s going to hate it.” Regulus replied approvingly. Snape blushed. 

“These are my only dress robes,” she muttered.

“Even better, come in, the others are in the parlor.” 

The parlor was crowded with men and women dressed in their finery, gossiping about fashion and politics. The women wore pastel dress robes with hats, while the men wore neutral colored robes made out of linen. Snape recognized some of the guest’s faces from their pictures in the Daily Prophet, and even recognized the young man she met at the Hog’s Head, Lucius Malfoy, discussing something amusing with a beautiful witch with long blonde hair. Next to her was, could it be? She had heard rumors about the dark-haired woman next to them. Bellatrix Lestrange. While no one could prove she was a Death Eater, there had been rumors even at Hogwarts that she had been known as one of the few women amongst the ranks. The papers had printed descriptions similar to her when describing eyewitness accounts of her cruelty, but she always had iron-clad alibi. She was casually standing at this engagement party, making fun of the other guests. 

Snape looked around for her peers. It seemed most of the guests were older, but soon enough she found Aoife, Niobe and Honoria sitting on an imposing black velvet settee. Niobe was looking around the room for someone, Honoria was discussing the wedding dress, and Aoife was sitting silently nursing a cup of green punch. It looked ghastly, filled with floating fruit in a bowl on a large table with sandwiches, macarons and a large cake. 

Snape gave a disingenuous smile. “Aoife, you look marvelous. How is our blushing bride?”

Surprisingly, Aoife looked happy to see her. She stood up and hugged her, causing Snape to squeak in shock. “Oh Severa, I’m so glad you came. I missed you ever so much.” She leaned over to whisper in Snape’s ear. “Please talk about one of your boring hobbies, if I have to hear about dress robes and flower arrangements, I’ll snap. I need some mental stimulation.” 

While Snape didn’t appreciate the girl calling her interests boring, she obliged in talking about potions. She also thought it would be a good time to gloat about her OWLS knowing Aoife didn’t take them. 

Aoife frowned. “Maybe I was a bit hasty in forgoing the OWLS, it seems like it would have been fun.”

“I can assure you, it wasn’t,” Honoria comforted. “We aren’t all swots like Severa, it was a nightmare!” 

“Oh, don’t be so disparaging just because she knows a thing or two about Potions.” Regulus interrupted.

“Regulus! Where were you? I thought you’d spend a little more time with us,” pouted Niobe.

“Sorry, Flint. I have to say hello to the family, talk to all of them. Obligations and duty, and all that.” Regulus replied airily. He turned to Snape. “Oh, I don’t think your boyfriend showed up, but if you wanted to say hello to Sirius he’ll be down shortly. If he isn’t, Mother’s going to make a scene.” 

Niobe raised an eyebrow. “You’re still with Potter? I thought he would have left you by now.” 

“He did,” replied Snape. “It seems most people haven’t got the message.” 

Suddenly, there was a rumble from the table as the parlor began to shake. In panic, the guests started to shout at each other in frenzy. The punch bowl started to spout like a volcano, covering the guests in the green fluid, pieces of fruit sticking to their hair. Aoife screamed in shock as her dress was ruined, the party favors were soaked, and the whole engagement was finished before the rings were exchanged and dinner was served. Goyle was roaring in anger and hitting things in frustration, continually screaming “how dare they!” 

“Merlin, what a mess!” cried one of the older witches. “This is Acromantula silk, it will never wash off.”

“I say, this is vintage, I’m probably going to have to go to Paris to get this parure restored before it starts to rust from all this sugar!” another complained. 

“The fruit is sticking everywhere,” complained Malfoy. “Dearest, we must leave soon, or I might have to cut them off my hair. And you know how much I hate regrowth potions.” The blonde witch, his wife, agreed as they headed for the door.

As guests started to complain and mill out of the incredibly sticky parlor, an imposing woman tried to reclaim order, shouting at the guests. “Please make a queue and retrieve your cloaks, we will reconvene for supper. I’m terribly sorry for the interruption. Kreacher, get the cloaks and clean up this mess! Those responsible will be punished,” she replied ominously. Judging from her resemblance, she was probably Sirius’s mother.

Suddenly, Snape felt a force grab her by the arm, she was about to take out her wand and strike when she felt a silencing charm cast upon her. She tried to find the source of the caster, but it seems the guests and the Elves were preoccupied. She felt a swift cleaning charm, and she wasn’t sticky anymore. With a fluid motion, an arm appeared out of nowhere and pulled her towards it.

She found James standing in front of her, underneath what was a sheet, snickering. “That was priceless, you should have seen your face.” 

Snape raged, trying to make a sound and hitting him. James nodded, “All in good time, let’s get out of here.” The followed the crowd out of the door and onto the streets of the square. James took off the sheet and carefully wrapped it, placing it in a bag he had brought with him. He was dressed in muggle clothes, jeans and a shirt with a light denim jacket. 

“Did you bring anything else to change into?” He asked. Snape shook her head.

“We’ll have to go shopping then. We should be a few blocks from Selfridge’s, we can walk.” 

Before they left, James remembered to undo the Silencing Charm, causing Snape to shout. 

“What the bloody hell was that?” she shrieked. James laughed.

“That’s new. I’ve never heard you so livid, I thought you’d be happy to get away from that nightmare. You’re welcome, you know,” James winked. 

“What about Sirius? You’re going to let him take the blame for that? His mother looked like she was about to kill him.”

“Sirius has an alibi. He is in the study with his father, the old man wanted to discuss some boring lecture on responsibility and some rubbish. Only two people had access to that punchbowl before the party. One of them was that horrid little House Elf, and the other was…”

“Regulus,” Snape concluded.

James laughed, “Exactly. So, are you going to give me something in return?” 

Snape felt satisfied knowing that after this debacle, Regulus wasn’t going to bother her again, so she humored him. “What do you have in mind?” She asked.

“I’m not sure. Why don’t we get you a change of clothes and we can head up to the top floor of Selfridge’s and get some lunch. I’m starving.” He replied. He wrapped her arm around her shoulder and gave her a nudge. She let it rest and the continued on.

It wasn’t until a few days later that Snape started receiving letters. 

The first was from Regulus, who was understandably upset about the party, and apologized for its disastrous outcome. He wanted to know if she was involved, and hoped she’d say yes, so he could swiftly plan his revenge.

Snape laughed, and wished him luck.

The next came from James, who wanted to confirm that she would visit their house in Cornwall in July, and if Lily was still interested as well. Snape replied in the affirmative and said she would remind Lily later this week. 

She assumed that her housemates would never speak to her again after the party, but they wrote. Honoria always sent a letter in the summer, but Aoife had started writing to Snape. They were never substantial letters, mostly questions about Potions theory. She never asked about Snape’s personal life, but she sometimes let details slip about the wedding, which took a year and a half to plan and would happen sometime after her seventeenth birthday.

Aoife wrote:

I don’t know how I’ll cope in that time. Gerald hardly lets me see any visitors. I must be quite out of my mind if I’ve resorted to writing to you Severa. Please write back. It doesn’t even have to be anything of consequence.

Snape was going to throw the letters in the fire, she might enjoy watching them burn. As she threw the last letter in, she stared at the flames curling the parchment, and decided she might as well reply.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lily and Vera visit James’s house

Lily looked at the map while Snape grabbed their suitcases from their compartment. The train ride to St. Ives was long, but Snape hardly felt the distance. She and Lily had even shared a bunk, spending the night in each other's arms watching the scenery pass by in the darkness of night. Snape could still smell Lily's hair as she thought about it now, and remember the feel of her body rising and falling from her breathing.

It was the height of tourist season, and holiday goers were milling about the station, bumping into them and pushing to get to the exits. Snape wished she could hex them, or at least inconvenience anyone who tried to push Lily.

"Did James say where he was going to meet us?" asked Lily.

"He said he'd meet us outside the station, there's a magical inn nearby we can floo to get to the house." Snape replied.

The sun was bright, almost blinding compared The the dreary grey skies in North in Spinner's End. The warmth of the summer's day was baring down on their skin. Lily was beginning to turn pink. Snape was lucky she had brought a hat.

The walked down the hill from the station to the car park, where James was waiting, waving to indicate his presence. He was covering his eyes from the sun, and his glasses flashed from their rays.

"About time you showed up! I've been waiting here for half an hour!" James shouted. Snape huffed, But Lily smiled back, carefully walking down the hill, suitcase in hand.

"Sorry about that, there was a delay at St. Erth." Lily apologized. She tried to adjust the strands of hair that were flowing over her face as the wind started to pick up. James ruffled his hands through his own hair and laughed.

"Well we should be getting on, where's the floo point?" asked Snape.

"Right, it's a short walk into town, once we get to The White Hart, we'll have reached our destination. But they're strict about ordering something first before using their network. Maybe we can stop by for lunch? My treat of course." James answered. He offered to take Lily's suitcase, which she accepted. He offered the same for Snape, who refused.

They walked down the cobblestone streets passed the whitewashed buildings, and Lily kept taking pictures of the view, remarking on how beautiful it must be to live by the seaside.

"Oh, it must be marvelous, waking up to the sound of the sea and the gulls. I've only ever really heard the horn of the trains driving by my bedroom in the middle of the night. Or the sound of the whistle for the mill. Vera, this village is so lovely, haven't you ever seen anything like it?" Lily gushed.

"How much farther are we, James?" Snape asked

"We're here," he replied, pointing at the place.

The White Hart was a dilapidated old inn that was two storeys, with a thatched roof and a Tudor style facade. The sign featured a pale white deer with a golden arrow through the neck, as it was dancing with a crown painted on top.

Snape exchanged a look with James, who shrugged. "Just a coincidence. This place has been here since the Plantagenets."

"Is that so?" Lily looked at the dingy pub and its patrons.

It seemed the magical community of Cornwall consisted of the elderly, there wasn't anyone under the age of fifty, and they were dressed in robes. The pub wasn't exactly full, but it looked like the regulars were in full force with most of the tables occupied. Snape was initially surprised they could get away with that in a small Muggle tourist town, but remembered that Notice Me Not charms were fairly easy to use.

They sat down and a portly woman with silver hair waddled over to their table. "Well, if it isn't Young Master Potter! And he's brought company! What can I do you for today?"

James beamed, "Hello Polly! Three Butterbeers, please. These are my friends from school, this is their first time in Cornwall, so I thought I'd show them some of the sights."

"Wonderful! Be sure to take a look at the Island before you head to Potter's Bluff. Once you're in the Tintagel area, it's hard to justify coming back here." Polly suggested. "Also, can I interest you in anything to eat?"

"Some pasties maybe?" James asked.

Polly winked at him, "I'll bring your favorite. You're in luck, I just baked a batch this morning." She asked James about his parents, then headed back into the kitchen. Their butterbeers arrived shortly afterwards, floated on a tray.

"Potter's Bluff?" Lily asked, taking a sip of her butterbeer. James blushed.

"That's the name of our house. It's charming, been around for ages. Like most of the Magic families in Tintagel," James explained.

"Your family has been here since the time of Merlin?" Snape asked, unable to hide her interest. She didn't bother touching her drink.

"Earlier, I think," James took off his glasses and rubbed them on his shirt, narrowing his eyes as he tried to remember the whole story. He placed them back on his face. "There was something to do with a family squabble of some sorts, so they settled by the sea, the other branch settled somewhere in Wales. This was probably thousands of years ago. I should know more of the details but I always thought it was so dull."

"That's amazing," Lily marveled. "Did Merlin go this area because of your family?"

James snorted. "I doubt it. I think he wanted to set up Avalon around here because of political reasons, since this was the ancestral home of King Arthur's father, and this is also where the lay lines meet up for certain rituals."

"I thought Merlin's involvement in the Arthurian cycle was mostly a Muggle invention." Snape interrupted.

"Well part of it is, the castle itself is still a magical artifact with magical history, but the tourist attraction known as Merlin's Cave is complete bollocks." James continued. "We should go there, even though it is mostly ruins you can feel the presence of their magical signatures. The real ruins are further out that the ones the Muggles visit, but it's also fun to go there and mess with them."

"That's not very nice," admonished Lily.

James ran his hands through his hair again, "They love it, makes them feel like they're experiencing the magic themselves, even if they can't feel it."

Lily frowned, but let him continue talking about the times when he was younger he was able to use the Disillusionment Charm and fly over tourists, dropping snowballs or bubbles when they least expected it. Nothing too dangerous, just something that couldn't be explained.

"That's remarkable, we're learning the Disillusionment Charm next year and you could do it before you went to Hogwarts?" Lily asked

James shrugged, "What can I say? I'm a prodigy."

Their pasties arrived, warm, plump golden squares of puff pastry filled with pumpkin and spices. Normally, Snape hated them, but it was the only thing she and Lily had eaten in hours, and they were delicious.

James paid the bill and asked for some Floo powder. Polly gave them a small box and escorted them to the fire.

James took a handful of powder and stepped into the fireplace. "Alright, you'll need to say 'Potter's Bluff' and it should take you to the main foyer. If you find yourself lost, send sparks and I'll find you." He called out the name and disappeared into the fire.

Lily grabbed a handful and stepped in, "Here goes nothing," she grinned before joining him.

Snape anxiously grabbed a handful of the soft, finely milled powder. She stepped into the sooty fireplace, almost coughing as she fully entered it. She grabbed her suitcase tightly and shouted, "Potter's Bluff!"

As she stepped out of the large marble fireplace, she barely contained a gasp. The foyer was large and open, with tall bay windows letting in the sunlight. Across from the fireplace was a winding marble staircase with a gold bannister. On the upper floor were paintings on the walls, staring down, conversing amongst themselves.

"I say, was that the Evans girl?" asked a portrait in a ruffled collar.

"I certainly hope so," responded another in tight curls and puffed sleeves, "I dare say she's quite pretty!"

The walls were covered in jewel tones tapestries and Persian carpets. Brass Byzantine lamps lined the walls, floating in midair.

"There you are Vera!" James called out. He made his way over to her, checking to see if she was unharmed. "All in one piece, that's good," he joked. Snape glared at him.

James coughed and shuffled his feet. "Lily is in the drawing room with my parents, who would also like to welcome you, by the way. I can take your bag up to your room while you introduce yourself."

"I'd rather you didn't touch my things," Snape grumbled.

James nodded. "Right. Mopsy!"

A House Elf popped out of nowhere and squealed with glee. "Master James has returned! What's Master James's wants Mopsy to do?"

"Could you please take Miss Snape's luggage up to her room? She will be there shortly to dress for dinner."

"Mopsy need to help Miss Snape with her dressings?"

"No thank you, Mopsy, I can manage on my own," replied Snape curtly, causing the House Elf to deflate. Glumly, Mopsy grabbed the suitcase and disappeared out of the room.

"Come on, we haven't got all day," James urged, grabbing her hand and dragging Snape into the drawing room.

The drawing room was elegant in an old world sort of way. It was long, almost a couple of meters, and contained plush velvet green sofas and leather winged chairs. It was lined with deep copper colored silk carpets and surrounded by various exotic plants. This room also contained large bay windows, which were wide open and filling the room with sun. Snape could feel her skin beginning to sting.

Mrs. Potter stood up, turning her attention away from Lily. The woman was old, much older than Snape had expected, but she was still beautiful. Her silver hair was wrapped high up on her head, almost in the Gibson girl style, and she wore lightweight blue linen dress robes. They were of an older style, similar to the high neck tea gowns of the turn of the century. She was wearing a long string of pearls, and also spotted a smart pair of glasses.

"You must be Severa," Mrs. Potter surmised. She extended her hand in a welcoming gesture. Snape gently grasped it and lightly bowed, as befitted custom. Lily looked uncomfortable. In the back of Snape's mind, she hoped her friend hadn't shaken the woman's hand like a Muggle. If she had, it seemed the faux pas was taken in stride.

Mrs. Potter embraced Snape and gave her a quick air kiss. "It's so lovely to finally meet you." She continued to keep her hands on Snape's shoulders. She stared at Snape, assessing her face. Snape studied those hard hazel eyes and could feel the woman gently prying into her mind. She clamped her defenses aggressively, causing the woman to click her tongue quietly.

"Don't be so nervous, darling," Mrs. Potter cooed gently. She gently ran her long delicate fingers over Snape's face. Snape shuddered at her touch.

A much older man, who looked exactly like James but slightly balding and grey, joined them and grabbed Snape into a hug. "Jolly good to meet you! You must be that firecracker that's been giving my boy a hard time, eh?" Snape blushed and wiggled out of the hug. Mrs. Potter admonished her husband.

"I'm terribly sorry my dear," he replied sheepishly. "I've been told I come on a bit strong. Monty Potter, and this is ravishing creature is Effie." He winked at his wife, who playfully swatted his shoulder.

"Oh Monty, stop it." Mrs. Potter admonished. She turned to Snape, "You may address us as Mr. and Mrs. Potter, or Fleamont and Euphemia if you prefer." added Mrs. Potter.

"I think I'll go with the former," Snape replied, much to Mrs. Potter's tacit approval.

She turned to Lily, "You two must be exhausted. Why don't you rest before supper?"

"That sounds like a great idea," Lily agreed nervously, trying to exchange glances with Snape, who stared daggers at Mrs. Potter.

"Mopsy will call you when it's time to eat, we meet at the dining room promptly at seven. We do dress for dinner, but if either of you forgot to pack anything appropriate I will be happy to loan you something to wear."

"I think we will be fine," Snape replied coldly. She quickly left the room, Lily rushing behind her.

"That was something alright," muttered Lily as they ran up the staircase. "What happened between you two?"

Snape glances over at the portraits, who were silent, staring and still. She grabbed Lily's hand and leaned over, "I'll tell you in the room."

When they reached one of the guest rooms, Snape slammed the door and bolted it shut. She quickly glanced around the room. No portraits. Just in case, she motioned Lily to the velvet four poster bed. They sat inside and closed the curtains.

"She tried to get into my mind," Snape hissed.

Lily frowned. "That doesn't seem like her, she was so nice to me. You sure it wasn't an accident?"

"I know what it feels like Lils," Snape protested. She didn't want to say she had done it before, plenty of times on her, so she left the argument to linger in her anger.

Lily lifted her legs onto the bed and lay down, sighing. "Well we have to somehow survive two days. Did you think James's parents would be so...weird?"

"I didn't think they'd be so old," Snape replied.

"I know, they even have that old people smell. What are they? Ninety?" Lily asked curiously lifting her head up and resting it on her hand. "I didn't know one could still have children by that point."

"Maybe it's different for magicals," Snape pondered. She leaned her head against the tufted headboard.

"I'd have my tubes tied by then, or whatever it is we do instead," Lily decided, laying her head back down and flinging her arms on the bed.

"It's a potion, depending on the dosage provides temporary or permanent sterility." Snape replied from rote memory.

Lily rolled over on top of Snape, her head resting on Snape's stomach, her hand touching Snape's face.

"Get off," Snape mumbled, pushing away Lily's hand. Lily laughed, and wrapped her arms around Snape's stomach.

"I think I'll stay here, you're much too comfortable," Lily teased, snuggling her head in Snape's stomach. "Why don't you move a bit? We have time for a cuddle."

"We better start getting ready. I don't know about you, but I want to shower." Snape deflected.

"That's fair, I do feel kind of grimy from being in that train for so long. Do you want to go first? Or should we shower together?" Lily replied teasingly.

Snape blushed, and jumped out of bed. "I'll go first."

After the shower, Snape applied a quick Drying Charm to her hair and tried to curl it, but it just looked frizzy. She shook her head and allowed the strand to remain limp. She wrapped the towel around herself and headed to the room.

"Ah Good, you're out," Lily exclaimed cheerfully. "I think we were in my room, so I took the liberty of retrieving your suitcase from the other room. I left it on the bed, I hope there's another towel?" Snape nodded and Lily headed to the washroom.

Snape quickly put on her dress robes and brushed her hair again. This time buts of dandruff started to fall from her scalp. She borrowed a lipstick from Lily's purse and applied it to her thin lips, then wiped it off when she didn't like the look. Deciding that she didn't want to be alone with the Potter's, she paced until Lily left the shower.

"I don't have any dress robes but I brought a party dress I stole from Tuney's closet. It's from Debenhams so it's nice enough, right?"

"Anything you wear will be perfect, Lily."

"Oh, stop it."

Mrs. Potter didn't seem too upset to see Lily in her Muggle dress. In fact, she smiled at her and greeted her warmly, offering her a seat next to James and his father. Snape was to sit between Mr. and Mrs. Potter.

Mrs. Potter examines the dress robes carefully. "One can never tell how the finished product will look without trying them on, but I think we managed. I hope you don't mind I took the liberty of designing these robes myself, it's a passion of mine."

"You're a fashion designer?" Snape asked disinterestedly.

Dinner was a light affair, just roast pheasant, potatoes, soup and salad.

"Merlin, no. It's just a hobby of mine. For many years, I was the one running the more boring aspects of Monty's business. Monty's mad for research but someone needs to manage the numbers." Mrs. Potter took sip of wine. She had offered some to the girls, both of whom had refused. James gladly accepted.

She continued, "James tells me you're interested in Potions as well."

Snape glanced over at James, who was laughing loudly about something with his father and Lily.

"Did he? I hope it wasn't anything too dull." Snape replied evenly.

"On the contrary, he mentioned that you've improved on various techniques in your standard brews, improving efficacy and reducing prep time." Mrs. Potter replied shrewdly.

Snape raised an eyebrow, "He said that?"

"In not so many words, but it sounds like you have an impressive set of skills Miss Snape."

"I know I've not been invited to your home just to be flattered," Snape surmised.

Mrs. Potter chuckled, "Well actually, you have, I don't invite anyone over. But you are partially correct. You must have been special for Jamie to take an interest in you. He never had a girlfriend before."

"I can assure you it's all a misunderstanding. Did you just call him Jamie?" Snape asked.

"Yes, that's our nickname for him. My sweet little Jamie. But to the point at hand, we might not have a company anymore, it's far too draining at our age, but we still have our contacts. If you or Lily plan on going into the Potions field, whether through research or merchandising, we'd be happy to give you a few introductions maybe even a small investment."

Snape's eyes widened. "Thank you, that is...a wonderful opportunity. I don't know what to say," she stammered.

Mrs. Potter waved her hand dismissively, "Oh don't be like that, it's a sound investment. And what would we do with it all anyway? Spoil Jamie with another broom?"

"What did you say, Mother?" Joked James. "Are you planning on getting me another broom."

"I'd watch out Jamie," responded Mr. Potter, "goad her and she might trade in your Comet for a Cleansweep."

"Cleansweeps are still perfectly reliable!" Protested Mrs. Potter. "They worked just as well in your Seeker days as I recall."

"Well there wasn't anything else at the time!" Mr. Potter laughed.

There was a crash and a scream from the other room.

"Mopsy." Mr. Potter remarked gravely.

They got up from their chairs and headed to the source of the sound, the foyer. To their surprise, Sirius was on the floor, covered in soot and bruises, deep cuts running across his face and arms. Snape noticed some of the bruising was green, a telltale sign of curse exposure. He was shaking and coughing.

Mrs. Potter leaned over Sirius's body, taking his pulse. Taking out her wand, she gave a quick diagnostic. "This is bad. Monty, go down to the cellar and get the usual, and maybe some Extra Strength Calming Draught for the pain."

"On it," replied Mr. Potter, rushing downstairs.

She turned to the House Elf. "Mopsy, don't punish yourself over the spilt tray, we need to get Sirius up to a guest room and dress his wounds." She addressed the girls, "I'm terribly sorry, but we are going to have to cut our evening short." Conjuring up a stretcher, she floated his unconscious body up the stairs.

"I'm coming with you," James stated.

Mrs. Potter smiled, "Good lad, bring some linen with you."

"Anything we can do, Mrs. Potter?" Asked Lily.

"I'm afraid not, why don't you two head to the library, or back to your rooms?"

They silently retreated to their rooms.

Lily paced, while Snape wrote in her journal. They could hear Sirius groaning in pain the next room over.

"What do you think happened?" Wondered Lily.

"It was probably his family," Snape guessed.

"You don't think they'd really do that, do you?" Lily asked, her hand covering her face in shock.

If her father had the ability to cast curses, Snape would probably have dealt with similar injuries. Thankfully, her mother was fond of psychological torture, and her father only had a belt.

Snape got up from the bed and headed out of the room, she stood outside the door, listening in.

"They threw me out, Prongs. I have nowhere else to go." Sirius sounded like he was sobbing.

"Nonsense, Padfoot. This is your home. You're staying here for good." James sounded steely, angry.

"He's right, you know. The Bluff has always been your home, always will be." It sounded like Mrs. Potter. "When I get my hands on that bitch Walburga, I'll…"

"Effie…" Mr. Potter warned.

"It's alright Mr. Potter, she is one," Sirius replied weakly.

"It's not that," he added lightly, "You can't threaten Walburga. Sirius is still a minor, and if she doesn't give her permission, the Wizengamot is within their rights to send him back."

"Can they do that?" Sirius asked weakly.

"Only if your parents request it, and I know your father's enough of a vindictive bastard to try, no offense."

"None taken."

"So we'll petition for custody. We just need to document these marks, and our case is practically ironclad," Mrs. Potter continued.

"They'll probably pull some strings to have the evidence dismissed," Mr. Potter replied cynically. "They wouldn't want anything of that sort tarnishing their image. We'll just have to do this the old fashioned way."

"Monty…" Mrs. Potter begged. "You won't! What kind of example are you setting for your son?"

"One that I'm proud of, now excuse me, I'll need to have a chat with the Blacks."

Snape heard footsteps heading toward the door and rushed back to her room.

"What's going on?" Lily asked.

"I think Mr. Potter's going to duel to keep Sirius with them," Snape concluded.

Lily gasped. Snape couldnt believe it herself.

The hours passed. The clock relentlessly ticking.

Lily and Snape gave up waiting, and decided to head to bed.

Around early morning, there was a knock at the door.

"Mopsy brings breakfasts in beds?"

"No Mopsy," called Lily, "We'll head down."

Anxiously, they quickly dressed for the day, going for the bare minimum morning routine.

"I hope Mr. Potter is alright," Lily hoped optimistically. Snape had a more grim expectation.

When they reached the dining room, they were surprised to find Mr. Potter already seated with a bowl of oatmeal and blackberries, animatedly recounting his duel with Sirius's much younger father. They boys listened intently.

"Still got it," he chuckled. "Of course, bothing compares to the skirmishes during the Grindelwald war, but your father put up a fair fight. Seemed to rely a bit too much on one curse though, needed more spell diversity. Ah, hello ladies! Sit down, have some breakfast!"

Reluctantly, the girls took their place at the dining table.

"So Sirius," Lily asked, "How long are you staying for?"

"Forever, presumably."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this is the end of Part I. We’ll be starting Part II, which will have a few chapters at Hogwarts but will mostly wrap up and start dealing with the War. Ideally we’ll be done by Chaoter 30. Almost there, folks!


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Back to Hogwarts!

Snape and Lily didn’t want to bother James too much with Sirius’s condition and spent most of their holiday by the sea, standing over the cliffs and taking in the crisp air. They had managed to visit the lay lines of Tintagel, and Snape could feel the ancient magic crackling around her. 

Snape took pleasure in walking on the beach, the sand sinking down on her feet, while Lily held her hand and murmured about the view, her head resting on Snape’s shoulder, her arm wrapped around her. She could feel Lily’s curves as she ran over her torso, running her hands over her waist. They were alone.

They sat down on the sand and waited for the tide to come in, listening to the sound of the surf. Lily sighed, and nuzzled into Snape.

“I wish this moment could last forever,” she mumbled wistfully.

Snape ran her hand down Lily’s beautiful auburn hair. 

“Lily, I care for you. Deeply.” Snape stared.

“Likewise,” Lily replied, laughing.

“No,” Snape sighed, gripping her tightly. “Lily, I want you. I desire you. I, I think I love you.”

Lily’s eyes widened and she made eye contact with Snape. She let go, visibly uncomfortable.

“Vera, that’s wrong.” Lily replied in a low voice.

“Why is it wrong? Do you not feel the same way?” Snape asked, trying to hide the anguish in her voice.

“It’s unnatural.” Lily’s face darkened as she tried to articulate her thoughts. She curled her legs into her chest and looked at her knees.

“Unnatural? Lily we are witches! We can change the elemental structure of practically anything, conjure items out of thin air, and fly! But this bothers you? If you are disgusted by my feelings, just say so. But don’t hide behind your morality,” Snape sneered. “We left that behind in Cokeworth.”

“You don’t understand.” Lily protested. “It’s not you, Vera. I know what you want, I’ve known for years. And…” She hesitated, her eyes watering, her lip quivering as her emotions overwhelmed her. “I felt it too.”

Snape stopped breathing, she could feel nothing but the pounding of her heart in her chest.

“I thought it was normal at first. I admired you so much, you know. I couldn’t tell if I wanted to be you, or I wanted to be close to you,” Lily continued.

“Why would you ever want to be me?” Snape interrupted derisively. “I’m nothing compared to you.”

“Vera you sell yourself short. You always are so confident, so powerful,” Lily said the word with a quiet rapture. “When you cast a spell, when I’m near you, I can feel your talent and I used to envy you. It made me want to work harder, study everything I could.”

“And look at you now, top student and a Prefect,” Snape taunted.

“Fine, be angry. I deserve it,” Lily shouted. She took a deep breath and calmed herself. “The point is,” she continued patiently, “I always knew there way something there, these feelings festering inside me. And they disgust me. Do you know sometimes, I’ve thought about kissing you, touching you, about…” Her voice trailed before returning, “In a way, I was almost relieved we were drifting apart, but I couldn’t let you go. Our fight made me realize that I can’t get over you by ignoring you.”

“I wouldn’t let you,” Snape interrupted again.

“But we can’t can we?” Lily asked desperately. “What about James?”

“James and I are over,” Snape replied firmly. “But what about you? Do you still have feelings for him?”

Lily scowled. “Was it obvious, or did you read my mind?” She picked up a pebble and threw it into the sea. It sank.

Snape stood up and stared at the ocean, the sun blinding her, the heat burning too intensely. “If you want him, take him. I could care less what he does. But don’t use me as an excuse because you’re too afraid to make a choice,” Snape replied.

“Deflecting the question again, as always.” Lily laughed bitterly. She let go of her cheerful facade. She was silent for a moment, and Snape couldn’t bear to look at her. 

“Do you think it’s possible to care for more than one person?” asked Lily. “I love you Vera, I know that much. But, you have to admit he’s handsome. I can’t help it if I’m attracted to him. And it’s unbearable.”

“If you had to choose, him or me, who would you pick?” Snape asked.

“After everything,” Lily pondered, “You.”

Snape dove back down into the sand, wrapping her arms around Lily. She hungrily kissed her, taking in her scent, her taste. Surprised, Lily returned the kiss and embraced the other girl. They spent the afternoon on the beach, enjoying each other’s company and exploring their bodies.

When they reached the house, luncheon had already been served. Lily decided to head to her room for a shower, and Snape headed to the library. As she walked passed the study, she could hear James and Sirius on the other side of the door.

“They wanted me to join this year, now that I passed my OWLS, father said I was grown up and should take on my duty to preserve our way of life, or some utter rubbish like that.” Sirius confessed.

“Merlin. I can’t imagine. But what about your NEWTS? You’d join while you’re still at Hogwarts? What about Dumbledore?” James asked.

“Apparently there’s a network of Death Eater students in the school, mostly Slytherins, but there’s some in the other houses too. I guess I’d have been a catch as the only Gryffindor,” Sirius muttered angrily. “He wants eyes and ears inside Hogwarts, no idea why though. Maybe your girlfriend knows something.”

“She’s not my girlfriend Pads, and you know it was never real.” James protested.

“But why did you bring her here? Why compromise your family?” Sirius demanded.

“My parents are safe, this place is warded til the return of Avalon. But don’t bring them into this,” James shouted.

“They don’t trust her, your mother’s desperately scanning everyone’s minds for intel and your father’s overdoing it with the humor trying to distract us from killing each other.”

“They’ve always been overprotective. It’s suffocating.” James complained.

“They care about you!” Sirius shouted back. “Do you know how lucky you are to have them?”

“Oh like you’re the first one to throw that in my face. They just don’t get it. I think we can turn her, get her on our side.”

“You’re blinding yourself to what’s in front of you Prongs! Look at her, she’s Dark, she’s going to stay Dark and take her with you. Why keep her around? Is it because of Lily?” 

“I can’t give up on her because she has Dark interests. If you got to know her, you’d see she’s brilliant, passionate, and sometimes she’s even funny. Not hilarious but she’s got a dry sense of humor,” James chuckled. “You know, she reminds me of you sometimes.”

“We have nothing in common, how could you say that?” Sirius replied, deeply offended. “Just because you took pity on me, the disappointing Black heir from a Dark family, and Moony the sad little werewolf, and Peter...were we just projects to you?”

“No!” Shouted James. “I care for all of you, and I wanted to be your friend because I believed in you. I believe in all of you,” he replied firmly.

There was a scuffle, a sound of panting, a light moan, a protest. “Padfoot, no.” 

Without warning, Sirius pushed out of the study door, snarling as he came face to face with Snape.

“I should have expected you’d be listening in,” Sirius growled. “Well go on Scervix, get in there and speak to him. But I’m warning you, I won’t let you ruin him, he’s too good for you.”

“I’d say he’s too good for you,” Snape murmured. She didn’t know if she believed what she said, but the blush on Black’s cheeks, the visible shame and anger as he pushed her away made it worthwhile. As he passed, she could see him wiping the tears from his face.

She wondered if she should enter the study to gloat, or give James a moment of privacy. Seeing that he was staring out the window, she decided to have a word with him.

“How much of that did you hear?” He asked.

“More than you’d have liked,” Snape answered.

James took in a sharp breath of air and swore.

“It’s nothing,” James dismissed, “Sometimes we used to fool around, it’s normal. But I think Sirius just gets a bit clingy sometimes.”

“Lily and I might be something after all.” Snape stated plainly. James’s face fell, but he composed himself. He ran his hands through his hair, grimacing.

“I knew it,” he mumbled. “I thought I was paranoid but somehow I knew this would happen.” He rubbed his temples and sat down at the desk. “When?”

“This afternoon. I’m not sure where it’s going, but it’s all so new.” Snape responded, her mind racing as she felt very flustered, like she had to justify anything to Potter.

“I just thought I might have a chance. I thought maybe being here you’d see things differently,” James continued. 

“I’m not going to change who I am James. Sirius is right, but I’m not joining the Death Eaters.” Snape said firmly. They did offer the opportunity for so much power, respect, and a chance to fully embrace the Dark Arts. But the path had been blocked anyway since the debacle last year.

“I needed to hear that,” James replied. “Even if you don’t mean it. And you know what, Snape. I’m happy for you both.”

She was certainly taken aback. “Really?” She asked.

James stood up, “Really. It seems the best woman won. But I hope we can still remain friends.”

“Are we friends?” Snape asked suspiciously.

“You haven’t hexed me in months, so I’d say that’s a yes.” James observed.

“Remind me to correct that when we start term,” Snape drawled.

The rest of the holiday flew by. Once they returned to Cokeworth, it was a frenzy of long nights in Lily’s bed, talking and kissing. The sweet smell of sweat and desire lingering as they discussed their dreams. The radio playing faintly in the background as the rain tapped against the window. They had to keep quiet, but Lily’s conservative parents hardly suspected a thing.

The oddest turn of the Summer was receiving a Prefect Badge in the mail.

“Since Rosier’s gone I suppose we were one short,” Lily mused. “Well they couldn’t have given it to a better match.”

“Could I refuse? It’s going to cut into my brewing time,” Snape complained.

Lily pouted. “Oh come on, it’s not that bad. Well, patrols are, but maybe we can get a shift together,” she teased.

“That idea has merit,” Snape grinned, despite her annoyance at the added responsibility.

“And we’d be a power couple, two girls taking on the world,” Lily laughed. 

Snape pulled her in for a kiss, letting her badge fall on the table.

When September finally arrived, they had been inseparable. Snape boarded the train, hoping to sit with Lily. Instead, she found her in a full compartment with the other Gryffindor girls.

“Come in Vera! There’s room!” Lily called out. Snape stumbled in annoyance as Marlene gave her a sour face, and Trowler stared blankly at her appearance. Mary cheerfully offered a seat next to her.

“I finished the book you recommended, it was really fascinating, but I had a few questions,” Mary began.

Snape nodded, barely listening as Lily recounted her summer to her friends, barely mentioning her at all.

“I was hoping we could meet up, and discuss technique? I’d really appreciate your input, since you’re so knowledgeable about the subject,” Mary continued.

Snape snapped out of her reverie. “I don’t know how much I can help you, a great deal of skill is innate, and the rest is will power. Unless you’re being attacked, you can’t really know if it’s working or not. It’s better just to focus on compartmentalizing and deflecting.”

“Yes, but could you still meet me? I’d like to try, even if it’s hopeless. I can’t certainly try an offensive attack on myself,” Mary urged. 

“You’ll regret asking me,” Snape earned, but agreed to meet her anyway.

The ride passed quietly. Lily kept focusing on her friends, barely making eye contact with Snape. Had she done something wrong? What had changed?

Eventually, she and Lily had to go for the Prefects meeting and spend the rest of the ride in their carriage. While she noted the other classmates in the car, most were confused at the site of a new girl in Sixth year. Remus gave her a half-hearted wave. 

As the Head Boy and Girl went on about the various schedules and rules to follow, Snape found herself drifting from the tedium.

“It doesn’t do to space out this early in the year Snape,” whispered Evan Rosier. Snape jumped, and he grinned. 

“What do you want?” Snape asked angrily.

“I think we should have a fresh start,” Evan said. “I know we had our differences last year,” Snape snorted.

“But I know you Snape. You might have been led astray but you’re the right sort.” He paused. “Thank you for writing to Aoife, she really appreciates it. Those letters have been keeping her going. And maybe Cas and I were a bit harsh with you.” 

“I want an apology,” Snape replied in a low voice, aware that other Prefects were just as likely to listen in.

Evan’s eyes flashed in annoyance, but he nodded. “I’m sorry.”

“I don’t forgive you,” Snape retorted. “And I was Cas to apologize.”

“Fine, he’ll apologize too.”

The Head Girl cleared her throat as a method of attracting attention, aware that others were ignoring her. Snape and Evan continued to ignore her.

“So why the change of heart?” Snape wondered quietly.

“You just want me to tell you we need you after all, don’t you? Well it’s true, but I won’t beg.” Evan replied evenly, smiling so no one noticed their plan to commit conspiracy in the middle of a Prefect’s meeting.

“Then no deal, I want you to beg,” Snape taunted.

“It’s not just us, you know. Other people see potential in you,” Evan whispered. He was standing close to her, his face almost touching hers. “But I have to know you’re with us. Or have you chosen the Mudblood?”

The train jolted as the car drove over the bumpy tracks, and the students were falling over each other from the momentum.

Snape adjusted her bearings. The meeting had ended, and soon she and Evan would have to patrol. 

“I’ll think on it,” she answered.

“Not too long, I hope.” Evan replied.

Swallowing her anxiety, she went to look for Lily.

Snape tried to enjoy the Welcoming Feast, but she was troubled by Evan’s offer. She’d been willing to give up her old friends because she thought they weren’t an option any more, but would she be able to let go of them for good?

As she idly moved her mashed potatoes around her fork, she noticed Regulus had sat down next to her. He looked haggard, like he hadn’t slept in weeks. His hair was out of place, and his eyes were wild, panicked. 

“I thought you weren’t speaking to me anymore.” Snape declared.

“I’m not in the mood.” Regulus muttered. “How is he?”

“You could take a look yourself, he’s on the other side of the Hall.”

“Don’t try me, Snape. You and that Blood traitor lover of yours, don’t try to correct me. You’ve corrupted my brother. If he’d just done what he was supposed to, Mother wouldn’t have been so angry. And that wretched old man had to humiliate Father, in his own house!” He bubbled in indignation, hunching over.

“I had nothing to do with that! Do you think any of them would have listened to me?” Snape asked rhetorically.

Regulus sighed. “No, I suppose not. But you could talk to him? Try to make him see sense?” He pleaded, desperation clearly shining through his eyes.

“I can’t,” she admitted. “He’s against everything you stand for. If I tried to talk to him, he’d double down in spite.”

Regulus was shaking. “But why? Why did he give up everything. He’s a Black, he had to do this. It’s about honor, duty. Does that mean nothing?”

Snape didn’t answer, but she knew Sirius cared about both those traits, just not in the way his parents wanted. “Pull yourself together,” she answered, “or get some rest. You’ve had a long journey.”

Regulus shook his head and wiped his face. “He shouldn’t have left.”

“Your parents threw him out. He almost died from the curses set on him,” Snape accused.

“Mother didn’t mean it. She gets emotional, and Sirius likes making her angry. He’s just trying to get their attention,” Regulus dismissed. “It worked, so now he should come back.”

“Regulus…” Snape pleaded.

He stood up. “You’re right, I think I’ll retire early. If you can’t get through to Sirius, have a word with Potter. For my sake.”

After the Feast, Snape and Evan escorted the first years to the dungeons. They gave a standard speech about House solidarity, and Evan added some nonsense about tradition and duty, but it didn’t seem he was talking about the House Cup.

When Snape started to unpack her trunk, she found a small envelope placed on top. Tentatively, she opened it

From the desk of Albus Dumbledore,

Miss Snape, 

After you have completed your Prefect duties, please meet me at my office tonight at nine o’clock for an additional orientation. 

PS: I am fond of Licorice Wands

Snape checked her watch, it was ten past. Quickly, she made her way to the Headmaster’s Office.

When she reached Dumbledore’s office, she was greeted by the Headmaster who motioned for her to sit.

Trying not to look intimidated, Snape took in the sights of the piles of books, the small metallic gadgets and obscure magical devices on his desk. Everything about his office exuded magical power, but didn’t need to prove anything. Dumbledore was wearing his usual Start of Term plum colored robes, and decided to sport a matching blue hat. Despite the festive clothing, the Headmaster looked concerned.

“I’m glad you could manage to visit on such short notice Miss Snape,” Dumbledore began. He examined her carefully, in a manner Snape assumes was supposed to convey empathy. “While your assignment as Prefect was sudden, I’m sure you will adjust soon enough with the help of your peers.”

“May I ask why I’m here, Professor?”

“Ah, Yes. Severa, I want you to know that while it might seem like there are insurmountable challenges in your life, you should always feel welcome discussing these problems with your Head of House, or with myself if you’d prefer.”

“Professor if this is about the werewolf incident…”

Dumbledore’s eyes flashed, and he frowned. “We were not at present going to discuss that, but I will certainly have a talk with Mr. Lupin. The matter I called you in to discuss involved your activities last year.”

Snape paled. “I’m not sure I know what you mean.”

“Now, now, there’s no need for that. We can discuss the matter honestly, and without judgement.”

She could feel him examining her mind, and felt herself thinking about the events that had transpired- the brewing, the deals, quantities, and type. She even felt him go over the Polyjuice saga, but clamped down after seeing the events of the Imperius in her mind’s eye.

“My child, I’m sorry you had to experience so much misfortune.” Dumbledore replied pityingly.

“Well now you know,” Snape declared. “I suppose I should pack my trunk.”

“On the contrary. You’ve learned from your mistake, and you can help others with your new position.” The Headmaster suggested, eyes twinkling.

“I don’t understand,” Snape frowned. 

“You are in a unique place in your life, Miss Snape. You are at the crossroads, and you’re pulling yourself out of a dangerous path. It isn’t easy, but you’ve been able to do so with the support of your friends and understanding of the consequences of your actions. I’m sure there are other vulnerable students who need a friend such as yourself, and to know there are other options.”

“So that’s why I was chosen as Prefect? To be some sort of mascot?” Snape snarled.

“Yes, and no. Mr. Black informed me there are some unfortunate influences in our walls, and while we try our best to protect everyone, sometimes the ills of the world sneak in.”

“You’re talking about the students involved in the Death Eaters. I don’t think I can help you, I’m not really in a position of trust among them.”

Dumbledore nodded. “Very well, if you do find more information please feel free to make an appointment or drop by any time. You are not entirely scot free, so to speak. I will still have to write a few weeks of detention for your activities, and a note to your parents.”

“If I find anything of use, could we skip the note?” Asked Snape.

“It’s not a precedent I want to set, but I’ll see what I can do,” Dumbledore replied.

Snape nodded and departed.

As she headed down the stairs of the office, she wondered how she could use this meeting to her own advantage. She was going to have to have a talk with Evan in the morning.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sixth Year, Part One

Time seemed to slip by as Vera spent her days either in class or in Prefect duties. Whenever she had time, she and Lily would agree to meet and find a quiet spot of hide and maybe snog.

Snape kissed Lily, nibbling her lips and kissing her neck, smiling as she could hear the other girl giggle.

“Ticklish, are we?” Snape whispered. She kissed her at a faster pace, moving to the nape of her neck, causing her to almost squeal with laughter.

“Vera, stop it, someone might catch us!” Lily laughed.

“Let them,” she teased, “They won’t believe it, they’ll just assume we’re two good friends having some fun.” She moved her hands down Lily’s waist, but she pushed them away.

“Do you mean that, Vera,” Lily frowned. “Do you really want people to know we’re together?”

Snape bit her lip. She and Lily stared into each other’s eyes for a moment, and she sighed. “It is a bit much, isn’t it?”

“Well, at least it’s not illegal, like it was in the Muggle world” Lily mused. “But I don’t ever see any others out of the closet, as it were. Maybe we should be careful. I don’t want your Housemates hurting you because of our relationship.”

“I can handle myself, Lily. And I want you to be safe too. We don’t have to tell anyone. Well, Potter knows,” Snape frowned. “I told him about us back when we were at his house in Cornwall.”

Lily’s eyes flashed with annoyance. “He’s really the last person I’d want to know about this. Certainly not the most discrete. I doubt he could keep a secret if he tried.”

“As much as it pains me to say it, we can trust him,” Snape replied. “He even congratulated us.”

“Maybe it is better that he knows,” agreed Lily. “You know, I might even miss the bugger. I mean, I hated his advances but in some way it was kind of nice feeling wanted,” she joked.

“I will want you, always,” Snape replied, kissing her passionately.

* * *

 

Snape decided to renegotiate her terms with Rosier. She was going to start brewing again, but she was going to have to be a bit more involved. Snape assumed it was to make sure she wasn’t a free agent and was just as liable should things go wrong. Perhaps they were getting cleverer, but she doubted it.

She agreed to meet the boys at an abandoned part of the dungeons, somewhere further in the back than she had ever ventured before. The air was damp, and it seemed the charms protecting this area from the lake must be weaker, there was algae growing throughout the stone walls. Snape coughed from the smell of mildew, and approached the two figures waiting in the shadows.

“Alright, I’m here and I’ve got everything.” Snape announced.

“Pipe down, you don’t need to shout it out,” mumbled Mulciber.

Snape bristled, she hated having to be near him, but kept her face stony. “It’s everything, five Pepper-ups, five Blood Clotting Potions, and one Bone Knitting,” she murmured. She retrieved them from her bag and handed them to both boys.

“If you don’t need anything else, we can discuss payment.” Snape continued.

“You didn’t tell her?” Mulciber asked Rosier. He shrugged.

“Why don’t you put us on credit? Stay a little while, we might have some opportunities that are worth more than gold.” Rosier replied.

“That’s not going to pay for my materials,” Snape replied acidly.

“Then we’ll pay you afterwards,” Rosier persisted. “Why don’t you come with us, we have something to show you.”

Snape tried to hide her trepidation as Mulciber waved his wand, and the bricks in the wall started to dissolve, revealing a small room. It was empty, lit by blue flame candles on large stands. A few students were standing around, mostly Slytherins, but Snape noticed some blue and yellow robes as well. She saw Regulus in the corner, talking to one of the Ravenclaws in his year. He noticed her, but didn’t say anything, only raising his eyebrow.

“Alright gentleman, glad you could make it!” Rosier addressed the crowd. “Now that everyone’s present, let’s get started. He waved his wand and the wall closed in. Snape was trapped, she calmed herself and waited to see what would happen next.

Rosier began, “Right, I’m sure you’ve heard about us from your friends and family members, but they did not tell you everything.” He paused, giving a devilish grin. “This isn’t some social club, or some tea party. We are a brotherhood. We are bound by blood to a common cause.”

“Get on with it, Evan.” Berated Mulciber.

Rosier coughed in embarresment, then glared at his partner. “Anyone here younger than Fifth Year?” he asked. No response. “Perfect. We’re going to have tryouts, of sorts. Divide yourselves by year and pick someone who you hate. Then, start dueling. No bows, no rules. Curses are allowed.”

As spells started flying, Vera stood on the edge observing. “Aren’t you going to join?” asked Rosier.

“Maybe, when I see someone worth my time. Look at that one, his form is all wrong, that’s why his casting is missing the target. And that one doesn’t even know how to pronounce _Delposo,_ what an imbecile.”

“Would you consider leading a few sessions? I think you’d be a natural at it.” Rosier suggested.

“Absolutely not.”

“Oh come on, Snape. You’re always the one showing off new tips, and it makes sense when you explain things.”

She looked at him skeptically. “Please Snape. You wanted me to beg? This is me begging. I’ll pay you extra, consider it a consultancy fee.” Rosier insisted.

“It’s not worth it Evan, if she doesn’t agree you don’t have to keep asking her,” Mulciber interrupted. He gave her a once over. “It’s not like we need her, anyway.”

“I’ll do it.” Snape replied. “What will I be doing exactly?”

They exchanged glances, and she could tell they hadn’t thought this through. “Maybe what you were doing before, just watch them duel and complain?” Mulciber taunted. Snape glared at him.

“And if you have any spells you could teach them, we’d appreciate it. Just so we’re all at the same baseline.” Rosier added, noticing the tension between the two of them.

Sighing, she nodded. Rosier patted her on the shoulder, causing Snape to flinch. Mulciber snorted.

“Alright you lot, that’s enough.” The students stopped dueling, and Snape noticed a few of the younger ones on the floor moaning in pain. Mulciber took his cue and started checking for injuries and doling out potions.

“We have a new member this week, everyone say hello to Vera,” Rosier stated, ignoring her protests. “You might know her as Prefect Snape, but Vera’s fine. She’s going to be going over your technique, and giving feedback. Listen to her, she knows more hexes than most of you combined and I wouldn’t want to get on her bad side.”

“Why do we have to take orders from a girl?” One of the students complained.

Irritated, Snape sent a nasty jinx of her own creation and smiled as he gurgled on impact. The others were silent as they saw the boy’s skin turn purple and he started to swell, falling to his knees as he lost his breath. After waiting a few seconds, she cast the counter, watching his face return to normal.

“Any questions?” she asked.

* * *

 

While Mulciber and Rosier were the leaders of this little group, Snape found herself taking on more responsibilities as the weeks went on. It wasn’t as similar to tutoring, as she’d initially expected. It seems her classmates were hopeless, and she was basically having to teach the spell, and make sure they succeeded. Not like they would, it seems they were destined for failure, but every now and then she’d be surprised. When one of the little Carrows, the girl one, finally perfected the Muscle Snapping Curse, she practically hugged her before coming to her senses.

Worse than that, it seemed like some of them saw her as a role model. Even as she tried to avoid them, they would greet her in the hallway, or stop by her table at mealtimes. It was getting to be unbearable, and worse, conspicuous.

“Vera! Are you going to the Quidditch match this week? We’re going to trounce the Gryffs.” Paul Derrick bragged before NEWT Charms with the aforementioned Gryffindors. While they were in the same year and shared a few classes together, they’d never really been close before the group.

“You wish, Derrick,” Potter shouted from the other end of the room.

“You know I find Quidditch boring, Paul.” Snape answered.

“Well, it won’t be this year,” he insisted. He leaned over and added, “If you want, I can target the bludgers towards your ex, I’m sure you’d get some joy out of that.”

“You wouldn’t be doing that for me though, you’d be doing that to win,” Snape replied. She whispered, “Ease off on the chumminess, Derrick. I don’t know what your angle is, but you’re going to compromise everything.”

“There wasn’t any angle, I was just trying to be nice. We are chums after all.” “Well, we have no reason to be, so scram.” Snape hissed.

“You should still go to the match,” Derrick added. “If anything just to see Reg catch the snitch. That lad’s a maniac.”

As he headed to his seat, Lily took hers next to Snape.

“I didn’t know you had so many friends in your House, Vera. It seems Prefect life suits you,” she teased.

Snape knew otherwise.

* * *

 

Snape found herself spread thin. She wanted to spend all of her time with Lily, but with her involvement in the group she found she had even less time than before. Of course, she’d lie to Lily about what she was doing. It was easy enough to say she was spending her free time brewing. And Lily never pried. While Snape felt bad lying to her, she knew she couldn’t tell her the truth. Lily would never forgive her, and she’d lose her for good. It certainly didn’t help that she was becoming more paranoid of losing Lily. She’d taken to following her, owling her constantly when they weren’t together. It was only a matter of time before Lily realized Snape wasn’t good enough for her, and she’d leave. She’d have to stop that by making sure she never left her side.

“Vera, you have to stop being so aggressive,” Lily urged her one day after she had found her following behind after classes had ended. “You know my schedule, and we will see each other again after supper, before patrol.”

“Why are you so eager to get rid of me, are you off to see someone else?” Snape asked angrily.

“No! I’m just going to study with Marlene and Mary. Why would I see anyone else?” Lily asked defensively.

“Are you interested in McKinnon? She seems like she fancies you.” “Marlene? No! She likes men.” “You never know with those Quidditch playing girls, they’re all dykes.” Snape scoffed.

“Vera, that’s very rude.” “Don’t go, study with me. We can spend the afternoon together,” Snape begged.

“We did that yesterday,” Lily protested.

“Do you not like spending time with me? Do I bore you?” Snape asked.

“No, but you can’t be my only friend. Vera, listen to yourself! I love you, don’t you trust me?” Lily cried. Snape wanted to, but she felt fear. If she let go, even an inch, Lily might leave her.

“Is MacDonald still practicing her Occulmency?” Snape asked, changing the subject.

“Yes, she is. She’s been having headaches as of late though.”

“That’s not ideal,” Snape frowned. “Tell her to meet up with me sometime soon.”

* * *

 

“Thank you for agreeing to meet me,” Mary responded, fidgeting with her robes.

They had decided to meet in an empty classroom, nowhere too conspicuous. Her annex was practically common knowledge these days, so it wasn’t as if Snape had anywhere private anyway. Perhaps it would be better to meet in plain sight. The group wouldn’t be as suspicious seeing her fraternize with Mudbloods in public if she was claiming to tutor them. It might be frowned upon, but not treasonous.

“You were complaining about headaches?” Snape asked.

“Yes. After one of my exercises, I get this splitting pain, is that normal?” Mary asked nervously.

“No, it isn’t. It means you’re overdoing it, working against your own magic. Like I said before, this is a defensive power, so you’re not going to know your limitations unless you are under attack.” Snape answered.

Mary looked her in the eyes. “Is it really the only way?”

Snape nodded.

Mary took a deep breath and exhaled. “Alright then, I trust you. Give me all you got.”

Snape lifted her wand, and forcefully cast Legimens. Mary held her own for a good thirty seconds, Snape could feel her magic forming a barrier around her mind, but it was pliable. She just needed to find a weakness. At this point it was about will, about determination. Snape pushed harder. She felt the barrier collapse and Mary’s memories flow through her. Flashes of events, classes, birthday parties, trips to Hogsmeade, flying, it would be overwhelm both of them unless Snape settled on one thing. She saw an image of Mary, Marlene and Lily sitting on a bed.

Marlene was shouting, Lily looked upset. She focused her power on the memory.

_“Lily this is the third time this week you’ve left us for Snape.” Marlene ranted._

_“Vera needs me, oh Marley I’ll make it up to you both, promise.” Lily begged, looking forlorn._

_“She follows you constantly, keeps tabs on you when you’re not in class, and just disappears at a time for hours on end with no explanation. Doesn’t that sound a bit odd to you?” Marlene prodded._

_“She’s just using her free time to brew,” Lily defended._

_“And you know how Vera is, that’s just how she shows affection.”_

_“Lily, we’re just a bit worried that’s all,” Mary added. “You don’t seem yourself, you haven’t been sleeping at all and you’ve been unhappy since we started term. I’m not sure what’s going on, but you can talk to us.”_

_“You need to sort out some boundaries with that girl,” Marlene added. “She can’t control you, it’s toxic_. _”_

Snape let go, feeling herself reel as the tether between their minds broke. Mary gasped. Perhaps it was too sudden, too dangerous.

“I’m sorry, Snape. I didn’t want you to see that,” Mary apologized.

“You have nothing to apologize for.” Snape responded. She examined her wand intently.

“Has Lily really been unhappy these past few months?” Mary anxiously looked around the room.

“You haven’t noticed?”

“No,” Snape muttered.

* * *

 

Snape thought she could have it all, so to speak. Sneak away and steal moments with Lily, manage her Prefect duties, classwork and her weekly meetings with the group. But she found out soon enough that there are eyes everywhere.

She and Rosier were patrolling one night when he grabbed her arm and pulled the two of them into a dark alcove. He cast Muffliato, and noticed Snape had taken out her own wand, ready to strike.

“Relax, Snape. You know I’m not interested in doing anything untoward with you.” Rosier scoffed.

“Then explain yourself,” she shouted.

“You and the Mudblood, how long have you two been involved?” Rosier asked angrily.

“I don’t know what you mean.” Snape denied.

“Don’t lie to me.” Rosier hissed. “The others might be stupid enough to think you two are just friends, but I know. I can see it in your eyes. How long?”

“We aren’t even friends anymore, I barely see that Mudblood outside of class,” Snape lied.

Rosier cast the Stinging Hex, causing her to yelp in pain.

“How dare you,” he seethed. “I thought you had changed, Snape.”

“I’ve helped you haven’t I? And I’ve been useful.” Snape replied.

“Well you could be as useful as you want, but you have to be true to the bloody cause! You can’t just play the field and choose what you like.” Rosier continued angrily.

“I don’t see how my personal life matters. I’ve been brewing for you, I’ve been helping with your sessions, shouldn’t that be enough?” Snape asked haughtily.

“Oh Severa, you can’t go in half-measures. We’re going to need more from you soon.” Rosier laughed ruefully.

Snape’s eyes widened in shock. “We? Evan, have you joined them?” Snape whispered. Slowly, Rosier slid the sleeve of his robes up his arm, revealing the bright scar tissue of a skull and snake.

“Does that answer your question?” He asked morosely.

“I’ve heard of those,” Snape replied softly. “I never thought I’d see one. How’d you earn it?”

“It was for the cause, I did what I had to, and you will soon enough.” Rosier deflected. “Sometimes you has to make sacrifices for what you believe in.”

“Like Joey?” Snape asked. “Though I suppose that wasn’t much of a sacrifice, you were just using him, just like you’re using your meaningless position of power to hide your own inadequacies. Did you even care for him?”

“Don’t you bring up his name!” Rosier spat. He shuddered, and let go of her arm, wiping his face. He turned away, unable to face her. “I suppose it’s fair you attack me for that. I went soft and it botched the whole operation,” he sniffed.

“He seemed to really care for you,” murmured Snape. Despite herself, she almost felt sympathy.

“Well, it’s over now.” Rosier replied brusquely. “And lesson learned, it’s much easier to use force rather than affection.” He laughed. “You know Snape, sometimes I envy you. No one has any expectations about your future because you have none. No one is going to tell you what you can’t do, or who you can’t love. Screw your Mudblood for all I care, I won’t tell.”

“You know, your sister said the same thing last year. It’s not that simple, even for me,” Snape replied. They shifted uneasily, taking a moment to compose themselves. Rosier sniffed back some unreleased tears, and Snape tried to get her heartbeat to normal levels.

She coughed. “So, has there been anyone new. Since Joey?” Rosier eyed her suspiciously. “Oh not you too. I’m perfectly fine on my own. You aren’t planning on setting me up with anyone are you?”

“Circe, no. I’m not some foolish, meddling girl. I was just trying to change the subject.” Snape protested.

“Well, don’t try anytime soon. The last person who tried anything was Black, and that was only because the only two queer men he knows are me and his idiot brother.”

Snape made a face. “Well at least that’s not an option any more,” she teased.

“Shut up before I hex you again.” He snapped before uncasting the spell. They continued on their patrol wordlessly, but their dynamic had changed. Both of them knew their shared secrets, and agreed to keep quiet out of shame and mutually assured destruction. But somehow, a shared shame was less of a burden. Even if it wasn’t much in the way of comfort.

* * *

 

Snape still kept in contact with James, though without the fake relationship there wasn’t much of an excuse to make time for him. Even so, they’d sometimes meet in the library for study sessions, out of habit, or she’d catch him taking a stroll by the lake. At first, it was just a coincidence, but sometimes she found herself making time in her day to talk to him. It was reassuring to have someone neutral to talk about absolutely nothing with. It seemed that she was only making Lily cry, and her only other friends were focused on discussing new ways to cause bodily harm. Sometimes, when they would walk by the lake, the sun highlighting the caramel notes in his dark hair, his hazel eyes glittering beneath his glasses, she could almost understand why he was considered handsome.

“So you didn’t bother attending the match after all,” James grinned. “Don’t worry, you didn’t miss much, we won by a landslide. And Derrick’s attempts at felling me from my broom were pitiful by the way.”

“But I heard we caught the snitch,” Snape countered.

“Doesn’t matter when we were that far ahead in points. By then it was practically a gesture of surrender,” James laughed, and ran his hands through his hair.

“I’ve been thinking about the life debt,” Snape interjected.

“Oh?” James responded, looking at her intently.

“I’ve been trying to look through the library to see if there’s any way it could be reversed. I’ve combed through most of the legal section, and some of the Restricted section, but I was hoping we could go through together and find a solution.” Snape continued, looking at her shoes.

“Are you asking for my help Vera?” James teased.

“Yes, and don’t be so smug about it.” Snape replied exasperated.

“Very well, I’ll look into it. How are things with you and Lily?”

Snape sighed. “Honestly, I’m ruining everything. It seems like the more I try to hold onto her, the more miserable she is. We barely speak to each other anymore, and when we do, I’m too paranoid she’s going to leave me that I can’t be a good partner.” James didn’t say anything, nodding understandingly. It was maddening.

“What do you do?” she asked desperately. “What do you and Sirius do when you have problems?”

James ran his hands through his hair again and laughed anxiously. “It’s not the same. We’re not actually together in any way. I mean, I like birds, so does Sirius. I know for a fact he likes very buxom witches. But the thing is, he also likes me. And I care for him too. It just happened really, we were young and curious. And we agreed we’d stop when we found girlfriends, but it just kept going.”

“So why didn’t you stop?” Snape asked.

“Honestly, I was lonely, and it feels nice,” he smiled. “Plus he’s quite a good kisser.”

“So what do you do? Snog? More than that?” She asked, curious.

“Oi! That’s none of your bloody business.” James admonished.

“Fair enough,” Snape relented. “What about the other two? Are you involved with them?”

“No, I’m not. And I don’t think Sirius is either. Just us two from what I know. I’m not sure they know, it would be too much to tell them. And I’m not even sure how to stop it without putting a strain on our friendship. I don’t even think I could live without him. I’d die for him.”

“No need for dramatics, James.”

“I mean it, wholeheartedly.” James replied solemnly.

Snape furrowed her brows. “Have you tried finding him someone else? Maybe Joey?”

James looked at her skeptically. “Just because they’re both interested in men doesn’t mean they would like each other. Honestly, Vera. That’s very small-minded of you. Besides, I don’t want my teammates dating each other, too messy.”

“They should focus less on romance, and more on Quidditch,” Snape surmised.

“Exactly!” He exclaimed. They continued to walk, the waves rippling in the water as the squid had decided to emerge, a lone tentacle waving in the air. Snape stopped, pondering over the events of the summer.

“So were you the one who told Dumbledore about the secret group at school?”

“I had to, it was going to get out of hand if Sirius had to handle them on his own, and I wanted to protect him in case they retaliated.”

“I suppose that was a possibility,” Snape agreed. “They’ve gotten bolder lately.”

They had yet to target Muggleborns, but Snape knew some of the members of the groups would corner perceived blood traitors and attack them. They weren’t capable of anything too damaging yet, but they were getting careless. She studied James. Could she trust him?

“I’ve joined them. I’m going to turn them in once I have enough evidence. When I’m finished, you won’t have to worry about retaliation.” She replied emphatically.

James was startled, but she noticed he couldn’t help himself. He was hooked. Not scared, not horrified. He was intrigued. Interesting. “Don’t dive too deep with them Vera. If I were you, I’d write to the Headmaster soon. And if you need any backup, I’m around.”

Typical Gryffindor. He didn’t even know what he had signed up for.

* * *

 

Around end of term, Snape figured she had enough information. She penned an owl to Dumbledore, and waited for a response. He agreed to meet her after supper, just before curfew. Afterwards, she’d start her rounds without suspicion or any need for explanation.

After she had relayed all she knew about the group, Dumbledore stared at her gravely. His eyes were hard, but her didn’t look angry, just tired. “Thank you, Miss Snape. Your concern is appreciated, and invaluable. While it would have been better you hadn’t involved yourself in this manner, I suppose it can’t be helped now.”

“But I did give you something of note. Since you haven’t written to my parents, I assume you aren’t going to now.” Snape deduced.

“No, I will not. But that wasn’t what I had intended. I supposed I should also cancel your detentions as well, if you’re so adamant.” He added with a frown.

“I’d appreciate that. What’s going to happen now, Professor?” Snape asked.

“I’m going to have to disband this group, and place all members on disciplinary probation, and possibly expel the leaders.”

Snape paused. She didn’t think it would go that far. “Expel them? Is that necessary?”

“I can’t have an active recruitment cell in the school, from what you’ve told me, these young men were aware of what they were doing, and must face the consequences.”

“But you never expel anyone! And I know for a fact other students have also done terrible things, and they get to stay!” Snape protested.

“I think this is a bit beyond the pale,” Dumbledore replied. “Just like with magic, intent is a greater litmus test than anything else. These two intended to actively recruit students for the Death Eaters and taught them how to fight, and in some cases torture. I cannot condone that in my school.”

Snape thought about arguing against him, but stopped herself. Why should she? After what Mulciber and Rosier had done to her, why should she defend them?

“If you are concerned about your own fate, you will not be implicated and I will make sure to protect your identity when the investigation is conducted,” Dumbledore reassured her.

“No, sir. I want to be punished. I can’t be let off the hook, it wouldn’t be fair.” Snape responded dully. It wasn’t about guilt, it was self-preservation. If anyone knew she had betrayed them, they would retaliate.

“So let’s say two weeks suspension, supervised by Mr. Filch. You’ll still be required to finish your assignments and attend exams.” Dumbledore gave her a steely look. “Why did you join, Miss Snape? Did you enjoy inflicting pain on others, or was it something else?”

“I don’t know sir.” Snape replied uneasily.

“I hope you do find out soon, I wouldn’t want to see you lose yourself.” Snape nodded, and silently left his office.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fallout from the Vera's betrayal

"You know what? Dumbledore can sod off, I don't need to be here anyway, I've gotten my OWLS, it's not like Evan and I need to prove anything." Mulciber shouted petulantly.

Mulciber and Rosier were given the day to pack and would Floo back home from the fireplace in the Common Room. The rest of the Slytherins were tense. While they were the only two to be expelled, everyone else in the group had received a suspension, and no one knew for sure if more expulsions were on the way.

Snape watched as her two former friends packed their trunks. They'd invited her up to the boy's dormitory to personally tell her of their expulsion, and give her any last minute instructions on how to move forward. It seemed they had forgiven her for the break in last year, but hadn't forgotten it. The lock on Rosier's trunk was hastily repaired from her blasting hex, the seams in the wood white like old scars. She watched as Rosier neatly folded his clothes, while Mulciber rolled most of his into a ball and flung them in the trunk. Normally, she would have been anxious at the thought of sitting so close to him, not to mention on his bed, but she suspected he wouldn't try anything with Rosier around.

"Even so, it would have been nice to have the option to take the NEWTs," Rosier replied listlessly.

"You can take them at the Ministry," Mulciber added reassuringly, "I'm sure you could get in touch with the Department of Examinations."

"But it's not the same, and they don't have that option for all the NEWTS," Rosier sighed. "I suppose we should have been careful, that's all. Less members, less conspicuous targets."

"It couldn't have been our targets that tattled on us, they wouldn't have known all the members," Mulciber guessed.

Snape paled, wondering if they knew.

"Do you think it could have been one of the Ravenclaws?" Rosier asked.

Mulciber snorted. "Doubtful, they wouldn't do anything to risk their academic record. I'm guessing one of the Hufflepuffs got cold feet. So much for loyalty. Do you have any ideas, Snape?"

"No, but I could ask around," she lied.

Mulciber furrowed his brows. "Well don't be too obvious about it, we can't have the others lose faith in us."

"We've asked Regulus to take up the mantle and assist you in leadership duties," Rosier added. "Not that you couldn't do it on your own, but it might reassure the others if there was a more…established person involved at the top."

"You mean a Pureblood?" Snape asked.

Rosier pursed his lips. "Don't be so rude Snape, we were only thinking of what's best for the group. Besides, your history of cavorting with Blood traitors and Mudbloods is not forgotten. We know you've made your choice, but some still doubt your loyalty."

"He's already said yes," added Mulciber. "You two can sort out the details later."

Snape nodded and watched them pack.

"It's a shame we won't be here after the hols," Rosier replied, "There were some plans I've already set into motion that I wanted to witness next term," he added cryptically.

Snape tensed, and wondered if they'd planned an attack on a student, or another blackmail attempt. She was going to have to be on her guard, and maybe warn Dumbledore.

As they said their goodbyes, the other students gathered around, shaking their hands or hugging them. Honoria flung herself on Mulciber in tears. Surprised, he awkwardly accepted the hug and asked her to stop crying.

"I'm not dead yet, please don't make a fuss," he mumbled. It only made her cry harder.

Regulus stopped by to say his goodbyes, looking even worse than before. The bags under his eyes had deepened, and his clothes disheveled. He looked more upset by their expulsions than Mulciber and Rosier. His hands were shaking as he waved farewell, and Snape could see his eyes shine with fear.

"This isn't the end, we're just beginning." Mulciber reassured him, gently placing his hand on Regulus's shoulder. He nodded, tears streaming down his face as they embraced, then he went to embrace Rosier. As the two disappeared into the fireplace, there was an air of unspoken anxiety and sadness. The two of them had been such a dynamic part of their time at Hogwarts that their absence left a noticeable silence.

"I'm alone," Regulus whispered. "Now who am I going to talk to?"

"You have me," Snape answered, but Regulus looked at her with disapproval.

"Did you know? Did you suspect anything?" He asked sharply.

"No, I have no idea," Snape lied. She could tell from his glare he didn't believe her, but he had no proof to say otherwise.

"We resume after the suspension," Regulus declared determinately.

"We can't, it's too dangerous, Dumbledore will catch us, and then we'll all be expelled," Snape replied, her voice filled with acid. She softened as Regulus sniffed, and she tried to be sympathetic, not that he deserved it.

"How are your parents taking your suspension?" She asked.

"Better than I expected." He replied lightly, "They say it will give me time to decide on if this is what I truly want. Not that I need that. What about yours?"

"Like they'd care. My mother can barely motivate herself to get out of bed, and my father's too drunk to notice," she muttered bitterly. Her eyes widened when she realized that she wasn't really talking to a close friend, but one of her Slytherin allies. They were the last sort of people she should be telling about her less than stellar background. But, it was too late for that now, and she wondered if they already knew given her secondhand robes and tattered trunk.

"I'm sure if they knew the cause you were fighting for, they'd understand," Regulus reassured. "The Dark Lord helps those he cultivates, and he admires magical talent just as much as blood purity. In a few years, you and I will be in the Inner Circle, and they'll certainly care by then. Or I'll make them."

Snape blanched. Did she still want that anymore? She listened in horror as Regulus distracted himself with his plans for the future, babbling on mostly for his own benefit.

Snape knew she couldn't hide her suspension. Being noticeably absent from weeks worth of classes wasn't something one could hide, but she wished she wouldn't have to confront Lily any time soon.

"How could you, Vera?" Lily shouted. She'd known to find her at the annex, somehow finding her alone.

"Hello to you too Lily," Snape replied, idly adding essence of Murtlap to a new Healing Potion she was working on.

"Don't. Please Vera, I can't handle this. You promised me, you promised you wouldn't associate with those monsters in your House and what is it I hear? You were in some Death Eater training cell? Teaching other students to hurt each other? Vera, how could you do that? Especially as a Prefect. Those children trusted you!" She spat. Lily didn't need to add that she had trusted Snape too, and had genuinely hoped she'd keep her word.

"Those children, as you call them, knew perfectly well what they signed up for. And if I wasn't there, they might have hurt themselves worse testing dangerous curses on each other or by practicing unsafe dueling. I was only looking out for them," she replied airly.

"Oh don't twist my words. How is that helping them? And you lied to me, Vera. You try to control who I see, who I talk to, and then you lie to me about what you are doing! How can I ever trust you again?" Her voice was hoarse, raspy as she held back her tears. Snape turned off the flame on her cauldron and walked over to Lily, hoping to comfort her.

"Stay back!" She shouted. "I never want you to touch me ever again," she replied vehemently.

"Do you mean that?" Snape asked, her voice wavering. "Lily, I can explain, it's more complicated than it looks."

She described her undercover work and how she told Dumbledore of the group. Lily frowned skeptically.

"You expect me to believe that?" She asked.

"Ask Potter, he's the one who convinced me to write to Dumbledore," Snape pleaded. Oh Circe, she sounded like a fool. Having to rely on James Potter of all people to back her up.

"You told him before me?" Lily asked, unable to hide the hurt in her voice. She straightened herself and stood proudly. "I don't care about your intentions Vera. No one forced you to join, and you could have left sooner if your goal was to expose them. You didn't have to stay as long as you did unless you liked harming other people."

Snape swallowed and looked into Lily's eyes. She was so hurt, and it killed her to know she'd caused this pain. She tried to grab Lily's hand, but she slid away.

"It's true. I did enjoy it." Snape responded. "I enjoyed inflicting pain, and I loved the power that came with leadership, their helplessness and their fear. They feared me, and I loved it. When they looked at me, Lily, I never felt so sure of anything before." For the first time, she'd been able to verbalize how she felt about the whole situation and why she stayed. Much to her chagrin, Lily looked horrified.

"I think," Lily paused. "I think I need time to think. If you need class notes, I can owl them to you." She groaned. "Oh Vera, why must you make everything so complicated?"

Snape scowled, but didn't beg for Lily to stay as she walked out the door.

If Snape expected her group suspension to be silent, she was mistaken.

"Vera, when's the next meeting?" One of the Ravenclaw sixth years, perhaps Barty Crouch she couldn't honestly remember their names, asked.

"Do you think we could practice here, or would someone notice?" asked a fifth year Hufflepuff, Karl Jugson.

"Obviously someone would notice you idiot," interrupted Alecto Carrow, the youngest and one of the few girls.

"Who are you calling an idiot?" Jugson shouted, wand at ready.

"Enough!" Snape declared, shouting at the top of her lungs. The students fell silent.

"As acting Prefect, and de facto leader, you lot are going to have to answer to me." Snape growled in a low voice. "Now put your wands away, and I better see all of you doing your make up work, or so help me you will be begging to be as far away from Hogwarts as possible."

The students shuffled into their desks, knowing Snape wasn't one for idle threats. Pity, she had a few new curses she wanted to try out. Regulus, who had been silent the whole time, warily regarded her before heading to his own desk. If he wanted to challenge her, he could try.

"There are no more meetings. We'll serve our suspensions, and then you have to keep your nose clean, nothing out of the ordinary from any of you while you're at Hogwarts. Any more trouble out of any of you, and we're all compromised." Snape added.

"Is that an order from You-Know-Who?" asked one of the younger students sarcastically, but she could tell it wasn't entirely in jest.

Snape didn't answer, allowing them to come to their own conclusions.

Later that evening, Snape received an owl. It wasn't Lily's class notes, but a think cream colored embossed envelope with a red wax seal emblazoned with a peacock. Curiously, she opened the letter.

__

You've made the right call ceasing activities. We are impressed. We will inform you later on for further details.

__

LM

Snape couldn't believe it. She was receiving mail from Lucius Malfoy himself, when only last year he saw her in such contempt. Quietly, she took out her wand and set the letter on fire, dropping the burnt remains into her pumpkin juice.

The suspension came and went, and so did the Yule holidays. Snape stayed in the castle as always. This year she was supposed to spend Christmas with Lily's family, but they were still separated.

She was surprised to find that she had gifts for Yule. Her parents never sent anything, but she didn't know who else could be sending her parcels, multiple parcels.

Regulus sent her a small leather bound book on rare curses and countercurses. Snape hesitantly made sure it wasn't jinxed before examining its pages. It was certainly antique, probably quite expensive too. She wondered what she was going to have to give him in return.

Lily sent her a few Muggle novels, The King's Damosel and The Power of Three. She also sent a box of homemade gingerbread and a letter. Snape couldn't believe she wanted to see her again, and missed her. Snape knew she didn't deserve Lily's forgiveness, but craved it, and hoped she could try to earn her trust again.

Strangely enough, there was one more parcel. It was a small brown paper package tied with twine, with no note attached. Inside was a set of self-preserving vials, a pewter stirrer, and a portable, shrinkable cauldron. She'd been meaning to restock her potion making materials, but she never had the funds for it.

She didn't know if she wanted to accept these gifts, but she didn't know who sent them. Though she did have her suspicions.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Valentine's Day

St. Valentine’s Day

Normally, Snape didn’t like the day, she thought it was insipid and revolting.   
There was nothing worse than public displays of affection, except for the fact that those displays were usually used as a status symbol among other girls to prove their worth and desirability. Or so she thought. 

It was a much different day when you were loved, and loved in return. Not that it really changed much, it was still stupid to be honest, but somehow she didn’t feel the same level of antipathy as she held the thoughtful letter from Lily in her hand. 

Vera,  
Even after everything we’ve been through, I wouldn’t want to go through it with anyone else. I love you. Oh God, it still sounds so odd writing it out loud when I’ve had to hide it from myself for so long. I think we should go public. Damn what anyone thinks of us. We’ve earned it.   
Yours,  
Lily

Snape couldn’t help but grin as she as she read it again and again. She loved her. It seemed like it had been too much to even hope, but it was real.

“Did you get a Valentine, Severa? You glow like you’re beaming.” Honoria teased, trying to look over her shoulder. They were sitting at the Great Hall at the end of breakfast. Owl post had just arrived, and it would soon be time for class.

Snape glowered, crumpling the letter into a ball and stuffing it into her robes. 

“No, just looking over some notes for Charms,” she lied.

Honoria frowned. “If it’s about the group, you don’t have to try to cover it up. If I’d known what you were doing, I’d gladly have helped you.”

“I’m glad you didn’t, you would have been suspended like the rest of us and bid adieu to any job at the Ministry” Snape replied. She finished her coffee. It seems the House Elves hadn’t burnt it today.

“But it must have been grand! Sneaking about and dueling. Oh, and all that extra time with the boys!” Honoria gushed.

Snape scoffed. “More like they dumped all the work on me. I was doing all the work while they focused on the logistics, whatever that means. ” 

She was beginning to feel a bit tense, jittery. Perhaps the coffee was a bit strong, she could feel the palpitations.

“I’m sure it was because you were the only one who knew what you were doing,” Honoria laughed. “Not like they’d give you any credit.”

She could feel herself shaking, ever so slightly, her fingers twitching. The Great Hall seemed brighter, almost too bright and her head was fuzzy.

“I suppose so,” Snape replied dreamily. “I mean, I’m not as talented as James, but he’s exceptional,” she giggled. 

“James? What does he have to do with anything?” Honoria asked. “Are you still thinking about him, Severa. It’s been months since it ended.”

She glanced over at the Gryffindor table. Her head was throbbing. She could feel pressure in her lower extremities. She could feel sweat dripping from her brow. Oh no. 

She couldn’t help but stare. James was telling a joke to Pettigrew, who was laughing. Black responded with something that made them both laugh, but she couldn’t hear from this distance.

He looked so beautiful when he laughed. So carefree, so poised.

No. No.

Obviously, this was not a natural response. James was now touching Lupin’s shoulder, looking very reassuring. It must be nice being able to touch him. 

She shuddered involuntarily in disgust. Fight it. 

This couldn’t be Amortentia, she would have smelled it. Unless it was masked by the coffee. No, it must be one of the Fancourt varieties. Maybe she could make an antidote if she…

She stood up and leaned against the table.

“Severa? Are you alright?” Honoria asked anxiously.

“I’m perfectly fine, H. Never better,” she replied in the same dreamy manner. She didn’t know why she sounded like that. Speaking felt like her mouth was stuffed with cotton.

She wanted to be near him. She wanted to bask in his presence, smell him, hold him. She needed him be near him, or else it was unbearable.

Her feet plodding like they were lead, she trudged over to the Gryffindor table.

“And when he brings down the chalkboard, that’s when he’ll see the message we’ve written,” James continued before noticing her. “Oh. Hello Snape, what are you doing here?” 

Silently, she sat down next to him and rested her head on his shoulder, much to the horror of those around him. She clasped her left hand in his, and wrapped her other arm around his waist. As she nuzzled his shoulder, she inhaled his scent. “You smell wonderful.”

“What?” He asked, completely caught off guard. 

She giggled again. “Oh, you’re so funny, James. Jamie, Oh James,” she started humming some song from the recesses of her brain. Something by Robert Burns probably, she couldn’t remember. 

“Alright Snape, let off. I’m not sure what you’re going for, but this isn’t funny.” Black reprimanded. 

She didn’t even bother looking at Black, only giving her attention to James. She stared intently at his shimmering hazel eyes. They were a beautiful mixture of green and brown, like the woods, with flecks of gold in the iris, like sunlight on the trees. They were so wide and trembling, so endearing, but they were covered by his spectacles. She took them off his face, folded them, and placed them in the pocket of his robes. 

“Oi! What was that for?” He asked. 

“Vera, is everything alright?” asked Lupin, sounding genuinely concerned.

“I think she’s gone mad,” muttered Pettigrew.

Their voices sounded so distant. So remote. 

“Perhaps I have,” she laughed manically. “Love is merely a madness, and deserves a whip as madmen do,” she replied, remembering deep in her memory she’d heard it on the telly, Shakespeare, As You Like It. She hadn’t even been paying attention.

She grabbed his hair and aggressively kissed him, laughing as she heard him emit a gasp. She kissed him deeper, her tongue sliding into his mouth and exploring eagerly. He tasted of marmalade and tea.

“Vera!” She could hear someone shout at the table. Perhaps it was Lily? Some girl, it didn’t matter who. She ran her free hand over his chest, moving downwards until he grasped it and pushed her away.

“Alright, that’s enough,” James replied gruffly. “What was that about?” he demanded.

“I want you, I need you, I love you James,” she answered, only faintly aware of the scene she was causing. James looked gorgeous when his face turned that lovely shade of red, it matched his robes so well.

He glared angrily at his friends. “Who did this? Fess up.”

The three of them looked just as surprised as he was. “While I appreciate the effort that went into this, you know this isn’t my style Prongs,” Black replied. “The idea of having Snape of all people all over you is just revolting.”

“And we work best as a group,” Pettigrew added. “If one of us was going to prank you, the rest of us would have known.”

“And it wouldn’t have been love potions,” Lupin agreed.

She moved next to him, hugging his waist again like a lamprey. He could feel her body so close to his, her breath on his face, her breasts pressed to his chest. James felt he would die from the humiliation, shame heating him up from the inside. And Evans glaring daggers at him only made it worse. 

“I think I’ll take her to Slughorn, she if he can straighten her out,” James mumbled, dragging Snape by the wrist as she giggled.

When they were out of sight and heading for the stairs to the dungeons, she grabbed him and kissed him again, this time with more tongue. Her arms wrapped around his neck as she craned her neck upwards, her thin lips moving against his, her body grinding against his. He felt himself lapse, before pushing her away again. They kept walking, but she was very determined. Much to his horror, she was equally grabby with the rest of him, and had to swat her away.

The worst part was that he was physically reacting to it. Though that was normal, wasn’t it? Anyone’s body would respond to stimulus, and proximity of another person. It certainly didn’t help that he was a teenage boy, and his hormones were all over the place.

“You can have me,” she murmured huskily. “We can skip class, and find somewhere,” desperation lacing her voice.

James felt his ears turn red. She must really be under a strong dose. He wasn’t even sure Snape liked sex, she seemed like the type of person who’d reproduce by splitting in two.

“No one would know,” she pleaded. “I wouldn’t tell if that’s what you’re worried about, and I’d do anything you’d want, you could even call me Scervix or laugh at me, or hurt me, I don’t care,” she rambled.

It would have been very easy, if he was that type of person. He’d even imagined scenarios similar to this, of course in those cases she was willing. That had been a bit of a shock this first time he had one of those kind of dreams in Fourth Year.

James gave a huff of frustration. “We’re here.”

He knocked on the door and guided her to Slughorn’s office. The old man chuckled as James recounted the story.

“Mixed up your drinks didn’t you, Miss Snape? Happens all the time.” He walked over to his cabinet and retrieved the antidote, then administered the dose.

She coughed, the groaned. They guided her to one of Slughorn’s plush armchairs and she sat, hands covering her face.

“Perhaps you better head to class, Mr. Potter. It was very admirable of you to escort the young lady.”

“If Snape’s recovered, I wouldn’t mind helping her get back to her own class as well.” He replied.

Slughorn examined her, but she was withdrawn and shrinked away. “She looks well enough. No symptoms. If you still feel lightheaded, stop by the Hospital wing after class,” Slughorn added, addressing Snape, who nodded wearily. She glared at Potter coldly.

“I think I will be well enough to go to class on my own. No need for Mr. Potter to waste any more class time.”

James had the gall to look sheepish. Snape did her best to hide her anger. She was going to kill him for humiliating her. Of all the stunts he had pulled on her, and on all of the days…

As they left Slughorn’s office, Snape was about to strike.

“Put down your wand, I didn’t do it,” James replied morosely. 

Even then, she cast a Stinging Hex. It missed. Damn Life Debt. 

She screamed in frustration.

“You’re upset? You were basically trying to molest me this past half hour, and everyone had to witness it.”

“Oh God, everyone did see us,” Snape trembled. “Was Lily upset?”

“What do you think?” He countered.

Snape closed her eyes tightly and repressed any tears. “Fuck. I have to go talk to her.”

“I could talk to her,” James offered.

“No, I have to make her understand,” Snape replied frantically. “It wasn’t me.”

“I think it was fairly clear you were under the influence.” James agreed, trying to sound calm, but still frazzled from this morning’s events. “I’ll explain it to her when I see her in class, and you two can talk it out later.”

“I hope you aren’t lying to me, Potter. If I find out you really did drug me…”

“I did not,” he replied angrily. “Do you really think I would do that to you? After everything?”

She paused. No, perhaps he wouldn’t. He wasn’t the same James Potter she had known before, and they understood each other, even if they hadn’t been friends. He hadn’t tried to prank her in months. 

“Tell her I’m sorry,” Snape added. “And that I loved the letter. I hope she liked her gift.”

“What letter?” James asked.

Reluctantly, she pulled it out and uncrumpled it, casting a quick charm to smooth out the wrinkles. She handed it to him and he skimmed it. 

“Oh Vera,” he replied sympathetically. “What rotten luck. But I’m sure she’ll understand.”

“I hope so,” she said passionately. 

He handed her back her letter and gently brushed his hand against hers. They made eye contact and he nodded goodbye. “Well, I’ll see you around.”

“Any luck on finding out about the Life Debt?” Snape asked.

“I found a few solutions,” he responded. “But you’re going to hate them.”

“Well, we should still discuss them. The sooner we get rid of this, the sooner we never have to see each other again.”

James laughed sardonically. “You really are going to hate them.”

They agreed to meet sometime this month, maybe once their schedules cleared up.

As they separated, both of them were glad to be alone for the time being.

Snape rushed to Lily after classes ended, and ran into her arms. She apologized profusely, and hoped she could be forgiven.

“Don’t be ridiculous, Vera, there’s nothing to forgive. You were drugged. Of course Potter and his mates say they didn’t do it, and I guess I believe them. Remus wouldn’t lie outright at least.”

“They didn’t do it,” Snape assured her. “But I still can’t figure out who would want to do this.”

“Well when you find out, let me know,” Lily stated angrily. “I will personally extract my wrath on them.” 

Snape grinned as she admired her girlfriend’s righteous indignation. “Perhaps you and I will do so together.” 

“Well we are in need of some couple’s activities,” Lily joked. 

“And here I thought you’d suggest I take up knitting,” Snape teased her.

“Oh, shove it,” Lily replied, sticking out her tongue. 

Lily nuzzled against Snape and held her tightly. “Well, I’m at least grateful that if it had to be anyone it was James, I’m glad he didn’t take advantage of you.”

Snape looked at her disparagingly. “You shouldn’t be, that’s just basic decency.” 

Lily nodded. “Still, the whole thing’s a bloody travesty. Maybe going public isn’t the best idea now. If you’re still being targeted, who knows if the next time it’s not something more dangerous.”

“If they’re only using Love Potions, they’re not planning on killing me. My pride may be wounded, but I’m still intact,” she reassured her, gently kissing her brow.

Lily chuckled. “So how was it? Is he a terrible kisser?” She teased.

“Sloppy, but actually not too bad.” She admitted reluctantly.

“Oh? Why don’t you show me.”

Lily pulled her in and deepened the kiss.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera and James come up with a plan they think is clever. It's not like they have that many options

Sixth Year came and went. Much to her relief, Snape didn’t have to interact with James Potter for the time being. It seems he was too busy with Quidditch to keep in contact, and it was for the best. There was no visible disgrace from the love potion incident, but most of her peers still laughed at her behind her back until she stated to hex them again. She’d gotten a few detentions as a result, but it was worth it.

Her relationship with Lily had improved. She was trying to be more understanding, and less controlling and Lily continued to give her space when she needed it. The physical side of their relationship had continued to grow, though it seemed they were just as content holding each other and read together. 

With the advent of the Final Year, they were beginning to discuss their future and build their life together.

“Life beyond Hogwarts, now that’s a thought,” Lily laughed lightly. “Are you as scared of it as I am?”

Even if she was, she would never say so. 

“Any thought on your plans?” she asked instead.

Lily frowned. “Slughorn wants me to apply to the Potions Institute in Oslo for a Mastery.”

“Lily, that’s amazing,” Snape replied proudly. “You should go.” 

“But Oslo? I’d be so far from you! And who knows if I’d fit in. Most of the people there will be Drumstrang Graduates, and they’re notorious for their Anti-Muggle sentiments.”

“Well, they might, but they might be happy to have you. You shouldn’t judge someone by the school they went to, just like you don’t judge someone for their House,” Snape teased.

Lily kissed her and rested her head on her chest. They had snuck out and were sitting in a stone alcove at Gryffindor tower, watching the stars. It had been their spot for a while to talk. The light April breeze wafted through the room, sending them into a shiver. Snape held Lily tightly and kissed her back.

“What about you, Vera? You keep pestering me about my career, what are your plans?”

“I’m thinking of applying to be a cursebreaker,” she replied. “But I’ve hit a bit of a snag. I have the grades, and the skill, but I can’t seem to convince any of the professors to write me a recommendation.”

“What about Slughorn?” Lily asked. “He adores you.”

“No, Lily, he adores you. He says it’s not really a suitable career for a woman with the long hours and the danger.”

“Oh pish, sometimes I forget that man’s a dinosaur.” Lily scowled. “Flitwick? Kettleburn? McGonnagall?”

“No from all of them,” Snape responded. “It seems my extracurricular activities did not endear myself to them. They blame me for the whole mass suspension thing.”

“But you’ve changed. Can’t they give you the benefit of the doubt?” Lily asked.

“I think it’s something more than that. I think they’ve already signed me off as a Death Eater.” Snape replied angrily.

“Oh Vera, I’m sure there are other options. Maybe you could join me in the Potions field.” Lily persisted.

“That’s the last thing I’d want, but I appreciate the suggestion,” she smiled weakly. 

She was about to head down to the dungeons when Lily reminded her of Petunia’s wedding. If she was going to have to suffer, so would Snape. She even convinced Petunia to make her a bridesmaid, so she could be in the wedding party. 

Snape sighed. “Sometimes I wonder whether you really do like to see me suffer,” she muttered. 

When she made her way back to the Slytherin Common Room, she found that there was still one student up, staring moodily into the fire. 

“Regulus, it’s two in the morning? Shouldn’t you be in bed?” She asked.

He looked up and gave her a withering glance. It did not phase her. 

“Ah, I’d been meaning to talk to you. I have a note.” He pulled out one of those blasted envelopes from his robes, and she snatched it. She briefly skimmed it before throwing it in the fire.

“Lucius will be pleased to know all that effort for customized stationary was so vital.” Regulus drawled. 

“Why now? What do they even want me anymore?” She asked bitterly.

“Well, you’re almost of age. You’re fair game. Of course, if you want to they can initiate you sooner and you could work your way up. I’m sure you can get into the Inner Circle in a few years,” he added optimistically.

“What if I changed my mind? I was thinking of going abroad to study at the Oslo Potions Institute,” Snape lied casually. 

Regulus glared at her. “It’s much too late for that. Let me show you something.”  
He rolled up his sleeve, revealing the bright red scar she’d seen on Rosier. The skull and the snake eating its tail. 

She bit her lip to stop herself from gasping. “Is it new?” She asked. He nodded proudly.

“I was inducted last night. Made an excuse to go see Mumsy. Oh, if only you were there, Vera. They were so proud of me,” he beamed.

“Can I touch it?” She asked, curious. He extended his arm, and she gently moved her fingers over the raw raised skin. He flinched slightly at the pain but kept smiling.

“You’ll definitely reconsider once you get to this level, Vera. No more second thoughts, no backpedaling. We need you now more than ever,” Regulus murmured. He met her eyes, but she kept still and waited for him to try to use Legimency. When he did not, she looked away. 

“You’re so young. Are you sure this is what you want?” She asked.

“I’ve never been surer of anything.” He answered.

“So, how did you get it?” Snape asked. “Rosier wouldn’t tell me the details, but it sounds unpleasant.”

Regulus frowned. “You shouldn’t worry about that yet. It’s…not a big deal, not really.” He shuffled uncomfortably and rolled his sleeve back down, heading back to the chair. He motioned for her to sit with him.

“No thank you Black. Unlike you, I do need my rest.” Snape dismissed.

“Did you like the book I gave you?” He asked. “I hope you did.”

“Yes, it was quite nice, thank you.” Snape clipped. “Now, if you excuse me,”

“Just stay here for a moment. You don’t have to say anything, I just don’t want to be alone right now.” He admitted. “I know, it’s pathetic.”

“You’re right, it is,” She agreed, but still sat next to him on the settee.

As they stared into the fire, Regulus spoke up. 

“I had to kill a man, it was a Muggleborn. That’s how you earn the Mark, you know,” he whispered.

Snape froze, and felt a pit growing in her stomach. “Did you know him?” she asked.

“No. He was nobody,” Regulus continued listlessly. “They made his wife watch, then they killed her too. I…had to position them afterwards, to send a message to the Aurors when they found them.” 

They sat silently, but she couldn’t stay there any longer. She wrested herself from him and retreated to bed. 

As Snape lay in bed, she cried. There was no way out now, even if she wanted to leave. Did they know about Lily? Would Rosier tell them? 

Terror grappled her as her nightmares filled with the recurring thought of killing Lily. Her wand poised to strike, and a bright green flash.

She knew what she had to do.

The next day after class, she asked Lily if they could talk. It did not go well.

“Vera, I don’t understand. Why would you want to end things? Is it something I’ve done? I’ve tried so hard to be a good girlfriend, I really have.” Lily started to cry, and it was only making what she had to do worse.

“Lily, it’s not like I want to do this, but if we keep seeing each other, your life is at risk.” 

She explained the letter she received from Lucius.

“I can’t get out Lily, I’m done for. And I’ll be damned if they make me hurt you.” She replied in anguish.

Lily frowned. “I really had thought it was all over. But I won’t let them take you, we must find some other way. Maybe we could talk to Dumbledore.”

“What would he do?” Snape replied angrily. “It’s not like he’d be able to help me. And we can’t hide our relationship forever. I think Rosier knows, and he could tell any of them. I’m a liability to you, Lily. Please leave me to rot. Take that Potions apprenticeship and get as far away from this blasted country as you can.” 

“I’m not giving up on you Vera!” Lily shouted.

“What if I’m giving up on you?” Snape growled. “I’m just as stubborn as you are.” 

Lily wavered. “Do you mean that? I know we could fight this, or if we can’t we’ll at least have each other.”

“Don’t even think that. It sounds glamorous and fine, dying for love. But these people are ruthless. They might do worse before they kill you, and your last moments will be nothing but terrifying pain. Do you really want that?” Snape shouted back.

“I want you, I don’t care about what it costs.” Lily replied firmly.

They weren’t getting anywhere, it seems.  
Snape continued on, but she tried to avoid Lily as much as she could. As much as she hated to see her upset, it was for the best.

When James Potter stopped by her annex, he was the last person she wanted to deal with.

“I’m busy, Potter.” She snapped.

“You’ve been a hard one to find. I thought we were supposed to meet up months ago to talk about well, you know.” He circled his wrist in a motion that indicated he was trying to mention the Life Debt without being too obvious but failing.

“Well, go on,” Snape urged. 

James hurriedly sat down next to her, fidgeting as he watched her chop milk thistle.

“Are you going to just keep going with that, or should I wait for you to stop?” he asked.

Sighing, she put her knife down and glared at him. “I’m listening.”

“Oh.” He blinked. “Well, I was looking through the Restricted Section, when I found what I think is our answer. He reached into his bag and pulled out a tattered leather book titled Bonding Magick. 

“Didn’t think you were the type to spend much time in the library,” she snarked. 

“Shut up,” he snapped. He opened to a passage in the middle of the book. It was in barely legible Latin.

“So, this is from the Early Medieval Period, where it seems there was more information on the subject. I haven’t seen anything more recent, but maybe there’s something off about it.” James explained.

“Off?” Snape asked uncertainly.

“Well, there’s a few options here. The most obvious would be to save my life, then we’re even.”

“Then let’s do it, I’m sure we can put you in danger somehow,” Snape quipped.

“It’s not that simple, it can’t be staged, or else it doesn’t count.” He added, rolling his eyes. “The next option would be to save the life of someone in my line. I assume that means any children I might have in the future.”

“That’s not happening for a while,” Snape surmised, eyebrow raised.

“Obviously.” He nodded. 

“And, the last one…” He bit his lip. “Well, you aren’t going to like it.” 

“It seems like the only option, so tell me.” Snape urged. 

“It is the only option we have the most control of, but it seems a bit archaic. Apparently, it was used a lot by wizards back in the day…” James rambled.

“Get on with it, Potter.” Snape muttered.

“Marriage.” He blurted. “We’d have to get married. The bonding ceremony cancels out the Life Debt, since we’ll be bonding our lives together. But it has to be real, our magic has to entwine, or else it doesn’t count.” 

Snape was stunned. She furrowed her brows. “Will there have to be a ceremony?” She asked.

“Yes,” James replied. He blushed, like he was the only one mortified by the idea.

“Will we have to…consummate our union?” She hissed.

He looked lost, terrified. “I’m not sure.”

“I don’t need to express how awful this idea is,” Snape replied venomously.

James ran his hands through his hair and fidgeted. “I admit, it’s a last-ditch effort, but we don’t have that many options, do we?”

“We? What do you mean we?” Snape asked.

“Lily told me about well, your problem. If we do this, we can convince everyone you’re trustworthy. We can get Dumbledore to help you, I’m sure you could be useful in some way or another.” James pleaded. 

“Lily told you? That was a private matter!” She shouted. Snape got up, “I’m going to talk to her.” 

James grabbed her arm. “I don’t know if we should tell her. The less she knows about this the better.” 

“What do you mean?” Snape asked, eyes narrowing.

“Well, if you’re going to have to be a Death Eater anyway, why not use it to your advantage?” James asked casually.

“Because it’s certain death,” Snape replied.

“So, you’re just going to cave, give in like a coward? It’s not like Lily will be able to forgive you for it.” James taunted.

“Which is why I was giving her up! Why are you so interested in helping me, anyway? Now that she’s free, shouldn’t you be lining up your chances with her?” Snape asked angrily.

“Because this isn’t about us, Vera. I think we could do something that’s good for the war, for everyone. Not just us, or Lily.” He replied passionately.

Snape exhaled, then rubbed her temples. “How far have you gotten with this? Have you spoken to Dumbledore about this?”

James looked sheepish. “I…might have, he has his doubts about you, but he wants to know if you genuinely want to do this. We are going to meet one of his associates in his office. He wouldn’t tell me who.”

“When are we meeting him?” Snape asked.

“Um, now?”

“Now? And you didn’t bother to tell me any of this ahead of time!” She screamed. 

“I knew you wouldn’t have agreed,” James answered. He grabbed her hand and led her towards his office.

When they arrived at the office, they were greeted by a steely eyed headmaster and a broad gruff looking man with grizzled dark grey hair and piercing blue eyes, one larger than the other and moving on its own.

“Welcome! Please, have a seat,” Dumbledore motioned. “Let me introduce my good friend, Alastor Moody, Head of the Auror Department. He’s not here on official business.”

“So, this is the girl.” Moody harrumphed. “I’m not sure about this, Albus. We can’t trust her.”

“You can, and she’s willing to do anything to help.” James replied, grasping her hand. He looked her in the eyes determined. 

“I don’t know if I can in good conscious allow either of you to get involved in our operations, Mr. Potter, especially in this manner.” Dumbledore frowned. “Miss Snape, would you really be willing to risk your life, and your soul, so easily?”

“I’d be willing to risk everything,” Snape replied firmly. “I’d risk it all because I’m doing it for love.” 

Moody snorted. “Charming. Welcome aboard then. As much as I think this is a disaster, we don’t have too many options. When is your initiation?”  
“I have an open invitation, they can induct me when I want to join,” Snape replied calmly, her mind racing.

“Do you have any combat experience?” Moody asked. 

“I have been a part of an unofficial dueling club,” she added.

“Not good enough if you really want to live and be of use.” Moody growled. “I’m going to have to test your skills, get up.”

Warily, Snape stood up, and Moody blasted her with a curse. Instinctively, she blocked and struck back. They parried and dodged, striking with curses, but narrowing missing. Satisfied, he stopped.

“Not bad, raw but you could possibly survive. For a few months.” Moody admitted. “So, we better set some boundaries. You will not be talking to me directly after this point. If you are discovered, no one will back you up, you are alone. You will report any information on Death Eater operations and attacks to Mr. Potter, who will report me.”

“Won’t that be suspicious, if he’s seen with you?” Snape asked.

“We’ve got it covered,” James interrupted, taking out a small leather book. He handed it to Moody.

“It’s a linked journal. It’s blank, but when I write any updates it will show up on the page coinciding with the date. When the message is over, the ink dissolves. It will be timed for the same time daily.”

Moody grunted. “Did you come up with this yourself, boy?” 

“Yes, sir. I had a bit of free time, it wasn’t too difficult,” James replied nervously.

“Don’t get too cocky.” Moody snapped. He took the book and stuffed it in his pocket. He gave a nod to Dumbledore. “We’ll talk soon Albus.” He stepped into the fireplace and disappeared.

After they were dismissed, James escorted Snape back to the dungeons.

“How am I going to tell Lily?” Snape asked.

James frowned. “I’m not sure, but I certainly don’t envy you,” he chuckled, but his eyes couldn’t hide his worry.

“Are you going to tell the others? Black, Lupin, or Pettigrew?” Snape pried.

“I’m going to have to, aren’t I? I mean, they’re going to be at the wedding.”

Snape closed her eyes tightly. “Merlin! The wedding. How are we going to plan that?”

“I’ll take care of it,” James replied. “You don’t have to do anything.”

Snape nodded. “Good, because that’s really the last thing I want to think of. But no funny business.”

James laughed, “Oh, I’ll try. But I can’t promise we won’t have a little fun,” he winked.

“We’re really doing this?” Snape asked. “We’re falling to our own damnation and you’re acting so blasé?” 

“How else should we act? We have to get on with it, might as well not act so morose all the time.” James replied, his smile faltering before his mouth formed a thin line. 

“I hope you know what you’re doing,” Snape responded. “Because now there’s no going back.”


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera and James deal with the fallout of their announcement

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ll admit, I had a whole outline for this story written in detail, I just had to put it to paper. I guess I was a bit burnt out with life getting in the way, there’s no excuse. So I wasn’t able to write for two months. I had a chapter for my other story pre-written, so I posted it, but I always find this story a bit more difficult to write. Honestly, I ended up spending a really long time planning a wedding for two fictional characters. My Pinterest will never be the same. I was going to put the whole aftermath an wedding in one chapter, but I felt that it was getting too long

———————————————————————-

Snape was the first to break the news of the engagement. She wondered if James would have ever gotten around to telling anyone otherwise, or if he would have just mentioned it to his friends and family the day of the wedding. Not that she blamed him for being ashamed to marry her, but it was his bloody idea.

She decided to tell H. Maybe she should have told Lily, but honestly she couldn’t face her right now, or ever. And really, H was one of her closest friends, somehow.

“Engaged?” Honoria’s surprise was written on her face. They were sitting on her bed, which Snape usually hated, but she was willing to let her disdain for girlish activities go for once. Honoria leaned in closer to Snape, making sure no one else could hear them. Not that she was particularly subtle, Snape noticed Niobe listening in.

“Who’d want to marry you, Snape?” Niobe sneered as she continued brushing her hair. 

“James Potter!” Honoria squealed. “Oh Severa, this is marvelous!” Honoria hugged Snape tightly, much to her dismay, and Snape tried to wiggle out of her grip.

Niobe laughed. “Figures, only a Blood traitor would want someone like you. But I suppose we must be happy, our little girl’s moving up in the world.” 

Snape and Niobe stared at each other coldly.

Honoria interrupted, “He’s not really a Blood traitor, Ni. The Potters are very pure, and very rich.”

“But they’re not in the Sacred Twenty-Eight,” Niobe rebutted. “So who really knows how pure they are. I know when I marry, it’s only going to be a fellow Twenty-Eighter,” she preened. “I assume we will be in the wedding party? It’s not like you have any other friends.”

“I’ll let you know,” Snape mumbled. She tried meditating, deep breaths.

“Oh, you must write to Aoife!” Honoria gasped. “It will be the five of us, just like old times! I can’t wait for us to help you find a dress, and maybe we could look at flower arrangements- my mum knows a wonderful florist in Kent.”

Snape felt the beginnings of a headache. She mumbled an affirmation and closed the curtains of her bed, hoping she could find some peace.

As she suspected, she found herself unable to sleep, sweating from anxiety as she had the same nightmare as before.

Snape hoped that she could end term without a fuss and leave for the summer unnoticed. She was, however, mistaken.

She had found an empty compartment, and stared out the window. They had just left the station when she heard the door slide open. Lily was dressed in her Muggle clothes, a turtleneck, a vest and corduroy skirt, and was dragging her trunk behind her aggressively.

“Really, Vera?” Lily seethed. Snape had never seen her in a state of cold anger before. She forcefully hurled her trunk into the overhead compartment, while Snape continued to stare at her shoes.

“It’s one thing to try to break up with me ‘for my own good,’ as you tried to put it, and it’s another to ignore me the week after exams and get engaged. To Potter, I might add,” she screamed. “What are you trying to do? Why won’t you talk to me? I don’t need you to push me out.” 

Snape stared into her eyes, and felt despair seeing how much she had hurt the woman she loved. 

“I apologize that you had to find out this way, but it is for the best. It’s over. James and I are getting married. It will be very advantageous for me, both socially and financially.” She replied evenly.

“You never seemed the type to marry for money,” Lily scoffed.

“Money is important” Snape interjected. “Besides, it’s not like you’d believe me if I said I loved him.”

“But why him? If you really wanted that sort of life, you didn’t have to choose someone you hate.” Lily added. She seemed to want to ask something else, an unspoken question. If Snape was a caring, loving partner, she would keep that question unanswered. She was not, and hoped what she said would hurt Lily enough so she would finally let go of her. 

“It’s because you’re in love with him,” Snape blurted.

Lily pursed her lips. “I’m...not. I don’t know where you even could think of that.” She was fidgeting. She crossed her legs, and idly kicked them. 

“You stare at him constantly, you’ve mentioned him offhand in conversations even when we don’t need to,” Snape countered.

“Well, you’re the one who keeps bringing him back into our lives!” Lily exclaimed, fiddling with the frayed hem of her skirt.

“And you’re attracted to him. You’ve said so yourself. I could understand if it was another woman, but I can’t forgive you fancying a man over me.” Snape added spitefully.

“So you’re just going to take him, so I can’t have him?” Lily asked.

“Yes. You’re invited to the wedding, of course. I want you to be my maid of honor.” Snape smirked at that last twist of the knife.

Lily’s eyes narrowed. “Why do you want to hurt me?”

“Maybe everyone was right about me after all, I was only using you,” Snape replied.

“Or maybe this is just another attempt to push me away. Honestly Vera, you are pathetic. Well, you have your wish. We’re done. You don’t have to come to Tuney’s wedding after all. I’m sure she will be pleased. Though I don’t think you needed to come up with such an elaborate lie. It’s a bit far fetched that you and James were going to get engaged.”

Both girls stopped as the compartment door slid open, revealing James. He casually strode over to the seat next to Snape, placing his trunk above. He then slid next to Snape, sliding his arm around her waist and kissing her on the cheek.

“What did we say about public displays of affection, dear?” Snape asked through gritted teeth.

“They should occur often, with varied levels of intensity,” James grinned. “I’m sorry to interrupt you two, but I wanted to give you this, darling.” He handed her a small brown leather box. Warily, Snape picked it up.

“Well, it’s not a touch-activated jinx,” Snape mumbled. She tapped the box with her wand. Nothing. She exchanged a glance with Lily, who merely frowned.

“Come on then, open it,” James urged.

Gingerly, she pried open the box, as silver sparks floated out of the blue silk lining. The sparks floated onto the floor, without burning her or the compartment, and gave the small space a dim glow as the sky was beginning to darken to a shade of summer lilac. Inside was a gold stirrup ring with embossed circular swirls on the surface and a small pointed irregular raw sapphire. It looked medieval, but shone as if it was recently polished.

“It’s customary for wizards to begin an engagement by giving a piece of family history, I suppose it’s a nice coincidence we Potters use a ring, like the Muggles. I’ve heard of a few poor debs who have to wear some hideous necklaces,” he chuckled. “I’m just glad it arrived in time, or else we’d have to wait til the start of term.”

He took the ring out of the box, and grabbed her hand. Snape pulled away instinctively, averse to any form of touch. James pulled her hand back and slid the ring on her middle left finger. She felt a vibration, small and almost unnoticeable. She looked into James’s eyes, and noticed the fear and uncertainty hiding behind his smile. She ran her hand over her face, feeling the stubble on his cheek. He must have been in a rush, his eyes were sunken in from lack of sleep. He must be nervous too.

“It’s perfect,” she replied softly. Gently, she gave him a light kiss before retreating back into her seat.

Lily stared in awe at the two of them, before wiping the tears from her eyes. “I’m sorry, I have to go.” 

She quickly left the compartment, leaving her trunk.

“Was all of that necessary?” Snape asked petulantly.

“You didn’t like it? I’ve been planning this for weeks.”

Snape glared at him. James’s grin fell into a frown as he noticed no one was listening.

“Besides, I saw you were dying out there, so you’re welcome. Also it was really more for Lily’s benefit than yours,” he added.

“You’re not getting her, so you wanted her to see what she’s missing? How incredibly petty.” Snape muttered.

“Then we are well met,” James snarked. “Try to take care of that ring. It’s from the fourteenth century, and an important family heirloom.”

“Any magical properties?” Snape asked.

“Read the inscription,” James replied.

“Ad meliora,” Snape read aloud. “To better things. Rather grim, isn’t it?”

“I think it’s meant to be hopeful, but it also means that literally. If you’re lost, it has basic navigation charms.”

“Oh. That’s slightly disappointing.”

“Well, they’re not all winners.” James grumbled. “Fancy a game of Exploding Snap?”

“Aren’t you going to go back to your friends?” Snape asked.

“They aren’t speaking to me, for the foreseeable future.”

“You’re joking.”

She looked at his pained expression. He was not that good an actor.

“You’re not,” she concluded. “My condolences, Potter. But this was your idea. It’s not too late to back out.”

“No, it is. I said some fairly hurtful things, and so did they. I think we can make it up, but I can’t back down now. Especially not after what we just did to Lily.”

Snape frowned, staring at the ring. “So it’s just us then? We’re alone.”

“For the time being, they’ll come around,” James answered hopefully. “If I can convince Sirius, the others will follow. And lucky for us, he’ll be trapped in my house for the next few months. Of course, you’re going to visit.”

Snape nodded. “I suppose it would be nice to see your parents again.”

“Maybe this time I can meet yours,” James suggested. 

She glared at him. “Trust me, you do not want that. If I can avoid inviting them to the wedding, I will.”

“They will find out soon enough, my mum’s placed an announcement in the Prophet.”

“And you didn’t bother to mention that?” Snape spat.

“It was bound to be common knowledge soon enough. Better to make it official so no one thinks it’s some sort of shameful gossip.” James reasoned. He continued, “I was thinking we could have a Muggle style wedding, in a church, so you can involve your family.”

“There’s no need,” Snape chided. “It would just be my mother and father, neither of whose opinions matter. I’d rather have a proper Pureblood Wizarding wedding anyway.”

“But those are so boring!” James whined. “And besides, you said I could plan the event, because you didn’t care enough.”

“Very well then, what are some of your ideas?”

“Well, I was thinking I’d wear a dark blue brocade suit jacket with black lapels.”

“Sounds wretched.”

“And a bow tie.”

“Even worse.”

“But you’ve already relinquished control of the planning process. Wait until you see what I have in mind for the dress, I hope you like ribbons and lace.”

“So you are designing the tackiest wedding on purpose, just to annoy me?”

“The tackiest, Mugglest wedding possible. Feel free to invite your Death Eater friends.”

“Won’t that give away our mission?” Snape asked in irritation. 

“Oh, I think it will be a nice contrast. It will be all the more convincing that if you could turn someone like me into a Blood Supremacist, you must be great at what you do. Besides, it’s not like any of them will show up.”

He did have a point there. 

One the train stopped, she and James parted ways. For the first time, Snape apparated back to her house.

She walked through the back door into the kitchen. Dishes were piling up in the sink and it smelled of rotten food. Her father was sitting at the table, nursing a bottle of beer. She hissed, sucking in air. She’s hoped to avoid him. He stared at her.

“You’re back,” he stared plainly, looking directly at her for the first time in years.

“I do tend to do that after the end of term.”

If she left now, she could avoid a confrontation. Mentally, she was planning her possible exit strategy.

“I heard a gun go off,” he mumbled.

“That was me,” she replied. “I apparated.”

“You and your bloody magic. How long are you back from that heathen school of yours? Done turning tricks for the Devil?”

“No, Father, that part of our summer homework assignments.”

“Don’t be smart with me, girl,” he yelled, raising his hand. 

She waited for him to get up and hit her, instead, he sat back down and slammed his palm on the table. He hunched over, crumpled into the chair.

“Go see your mother, then come back and make me dinner,” he ordered gruffly. Snape ignored him, and went to put her trunk in her room, purposely walking past her parents’ room without a second glance to her mother in bed.

The next few days were a dull blur of chores. While the drudgery was a welcome distraction, she still resented having to be the responsible adult of the house.

When she heard a knock on the door one afternoon, she paused from scrubbing the floor. Could it be a collections officer? It would be like her father to not tell her of any debts. She rose, and wiped her hands.

When she opened the door, she certainly did not expect an elderly woman in an elegantly tailored set of black silk dress robes. 

“It’s incredibly rude to leave your guests at the door,” the woman answered hautily before letting herself in. 

“Can I help you?” Snape asked, not bothering to hide the irritation in her voice.

The woman sneered at the house, and wrinkled her nose before smoothing out the pillows of their shabby couch to sit down. “I suppose I should make my introductions,” she added. “Wilhelmina Prince,” she smirked. 

“Mother?” 

Snape had never seen her own mother in such a state of shock. Usually she was in a screaming match with her father, or too defeated to care. Eileen stared at the woman, unable to move, her face turning pale in anger. After mentioning it, Snape could see the similarities, the forehead, the small rosy mouth, the small slanted eyes, her figure, but these traits while plain on her own mother and herself looked charming, and perhaps beautiful on the older woman. Even when her face was turning into a sneer.

“Hello dear, you really should do something about your housekeeping. I’ve been here two minutes and no one’s offered me a cup of tea.” Her apparent grandmother declared.

“May we ask why you are here, after all this time?” Snape had to say something.

“Why, yes you may. Severa, is it? Lovely name. I have come to reestablish your place in the Prince lineage. Heaven knows we can’t have a bastard marrying into the Potters!” Wilhelmina cackled.

“I’m not a bastard,” Snape griped.

“What is this about marriage?” Eileen asked anxiously. “Mother, if I hear you’ve arranged something against my daughter’s will…”

“Your daughter chose this, I certainly wouldn’t have had any hopes for her.” Wilhelmina replied snidely. “Have you received your token? I assumed you have given the announcement.”

“Severa, you stupid girl, you are getting married without my or your father’s consent. What about your education?” Eileen yelled.

“I will finish my final year, we are having the ceremony after graduation,” Snape replied cooly. She lifted her hand to show her ring, “I suppose this is satisfactory enough?”

“Extremely,” Wilhelmina preened. “It will be nice to see that ring off Euphemia’s fat fingers for once, it suits you better.”

“You know Mrs. Potter?” Snape asked.

“Only on a social level,” Wilhelmina dismissed. “I’m not asking her for tea any time soon. Speaking of which,” she indicated to the kitchen.

“I’ll get it,” Eileen huffed. 

“I’ll come with you,” Snape followed, leaving Wilhelmina alone in the sitting room.

As her mother filled the kettle, Snape went to the cupboard to look for teacups.

“Get out the enamel cups, that cow doesn’t deserve my good china,” Eileen muttered. 

As Snape took out the enamel cups, Eileen aggressively lit the match and threw it on the gas burner, causing a blue flame to rise before placing the kettle down. “I can’t believe after all this time she has the nerve to show up here, after all those letters I sent. And you,” she pointed at Snape. “I sacrificed my life to give you the opportunity to get an education and a career, to expand yourself outside of the option of being a wife, and you’re hurling yourself back into that tomb.”

“But you didn’t do that for me, you did that for yourself,” Snape countered acidly.

“There wouldn’t be a You if I didn’t do that for myself,” Eileen hissed. “If my mother had her way, I would have taken a potion, broken things off with your father, and married a Crabbe.” She peered over at her daughter, examining her figure. “You aren’t expecting are you?”

“Mother!” Snape scowled. “No, I’m not, how could you ask that?”

“There’s no shame in it if you are, you have options,” Eileen replied, walking over to her daughter, she gently stroke her hair, causing Snape to push her away. 

Eileen gave her a wan smile. “When I met your father, the war with Grindelwald had ended a few years ago. The Purebloods were reeling from the loss, the right sort that is, and it made them clamp down, reestablish the old ways.”

She looked anxious, lines creasing on her forehead as she remembered. She took the kettle of the stove and poured it in the teapot, “I was a plain girl, so I was allowed to finish Hogwarts, but I wouldn’t have gone very far afterwards. But with your father, there was so much possibility. I was a typist, you know, before you were born. And there was so much that you could do that I couldn’t! Do you remember the piano lessons?”

“I was terrible,” Snape grumbled.

“But you can play!” Eileen yelled.

Snape did not want to remind her that the only place she could practice was at one of the nicer bars in town, and that it was an excuse for her father to get free drinks.

Eileen reaches for the Yorkshire Gold tin and scooped two spoonfuls into the pot. “I just want you to know that you’re a bright girl, Severa. And I hope you’re doing the right thing. You might be accepted now, but these people never change.”

“I think I know what I’m doing,” Snape replied. She picked up the tray and carried it into the sitting room.

“About time, dear!” Wilhelmina crowed. “Any later and I might have died of old age!” 

“If only,” Eileen grumbled.

“Don’t mutter under your breath, Eileen. It’s rude. I see you haven’t changed at all.” Wilhelmina added, saving her wand and allowing the tea to pour itself. She floated a cup to Eileen and Snape, then to herself.

“We don’t use magic in this house,” Eileen added tightly. 

Wilhelmina eyed her reproachfully. “Yes, well, I can see that. Your house might have been livable otherwise.” She turned to Snape. “We must discuss wedding plans. You will, of course, marry on the Prince estate. I’m having the House Elves prepare the grounds as we speak, I will not have you marry in that travesty of a mansion in Cornwall of all places…”

“Actually, James and I decided we want to have the ceremony here, at the church in town.” Snape replied casually, taking a sip of her tea.

“In a church?” Wilhelmina shouted. “My dear, I’m aware of your lack of wherewithal on how things are done, but you certainly cannot have a proper wedding in a church! There will be Muggles everywhere.”

“I’m inviting Muggles to my wedding,” Snape replied firmly. “I am half of one after all.”

Wilhelmina glared at her, and placed her cup down. “I see that you are more of your mother’s daughter than I expected. Very well, I suppose you are misguided. If you do change your mind, feel free to owl me. We must keep in touch.” Swiftly, she gathered her robes after marched out the door, not bothering to say a word to her daughter. Instead, she slammed the door behind her, causing the house to shake.

“Did you really mean that?” Eileen asked, her hands shaking.

“I suppose I do now,” Snape replied. “Mostly, I wanted to make sure she wouldn’t show up.”


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera and James get married

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: there is a scene of graphic violence in this chapter

Snape returned for her Seventh year feeling exhausted, and the year had not even begun. While her friendship with Lily was nonexistent, it still hurt to see her blatantly ignore her in the Prefect’s car. 

It seems she had become Head Girl. Snape was proud of her, of course, she knew how much Lily had wanted this. What dismayed her the most was seeing James beside her, boisterously going over the new patrol schedules, and bantering with the other prefects as if he belonged. He wasn’t even a prefect beforehand, but he was given the position of Head Boy, because he had the highest marks in their year. She should have been proud of him as well, as her future husband and all, but it was irritating.

Worse, it seemed that no one else minded.

“Right! Well, new year, new beginnings! While it’s been lovely getting to know all of you, Lily and I will be around to discuss any issues you might have. If I’m not around, feel free to owl me.” James finished, with a carefree smile.

“And we will reconvene next month to plan the Halloween Feast,” Lily added. “I’ll make a signup sheet for volunteers, but remember that participation is mandatory for prefects.”

“Not that you need to be reminded twice, planning is just as fun as participating. Vera, maybe you could help set up some decorative bats,” James teased.

“Yes, I could charm them to attack at will,” Snape replied.

“There will be no attacking other students, whether they merit it or not,” Lily responded, frowning at Snape. “Now, I think that’s it. See you at the Welcoming Feast.” 

As they dispersed into their seats, Snape found a corner or the car that seemed to have a wide berth from the other students. Derrick has taken Rosier’s spot this year, and she wasn’t in the mood to sit next to him, Regulus and the new Fifth Years. She expected a quiet ride by herself until James showed up. 

“There you are!” He whispered. “I was looking for you. I couldn’t stand to be here by myself.”

“What are you talking about? You know everyone here. I’m sure you could sit with one of your Quidditch friends.” Snape replied. She’d seen him talk to everyone in the car, joking and asking them questions about their lives. It seemed that he was friends with everyone, and everyone loved him back.

James looked around wryly. “Yes, I know everyone, but I wouldn’t say I was friends with them. I’m pretty sure most of them can’t stand me now that Dumbledore picked me as Head Boy, except you of course.”

Snape raised an eyebrow, but accepted his answer. “Being popular seems more effort than its worth,” she concluded.

“Perhaps, but it’s better than being an anxious wreck,” he concluded.

Snape hissed, “I’m not…”

“Not you, you’re far too level-headed. I was talking about myself. Whenever I’m nervous, I usually laugh it off. Most people don’t seem to mind, or they don’t really notice. And the secret to being popular is to get people talking about themselves. If you’re a good conversationalist you won’t even have to focus on yourself.” James admitted.

“You never seemed the anxious type,” Snape replied.

“Well, I am. Quite often, actually. Now you know my terrible secret,” he chuckled, running his hands through his hair.

“I suppose it makes sense,” Snape agreed. “I never really noticed your nervous tics before.”

James frowned. “What do you mean?”

“You run your hand through your hair, muss it up. I always thought you were being a ponce, trying to make yourself look good, but I guess not.”

“Do I really do that?” He asked. She could see his face fall as he readjusted his position, crossing his legs and slouching in an insouciant manner, but his eyes were so uncertain. He gave her a lopsided grin.

“Yes, but it’s not a bad thing,” Snape lied. 

How had she never noticed all that posturing was for show?

“In fact, I find it charming,” she lied again, but was somehow relieved to see him genuinely relax. He silently reached for her hand, and held onto it for the remainder of the journey. Perhaps it was for show, James had been mentioning the engagement to anyone who would listen, but she found herself holding on. 

At the Welcoming Feast, Regulus tapped her on the shoulder.

“Haven’t you been busy?” He teased. “I leave you alone for a moment and you get engaged! Perhaps we will make you a social climber after all.”

Snape groaned, “Spare me, please. Do you have any details on the next initiation?”

“It will be the weekend of Samhain, only time that works for everyone’s schedule. Will you be of age then?”

“Not for a few months,” she replied.

“Close enough. Though you’re probably going to be initiated as one of the grunts, so don’t expect any fanfare. But I’m sure you’ll work your way up.” Regulus added hopefully.

“So I won’t be seeing you?” Snape asked.

“Maybe? I’m not sure, the Dark Lord claims he has a special mission for me,” he replied in excitement.

Snape wanted to ask more about that, but refrained from doing so. 

“So, as your dearest, and possibly only, friend I assume I’ll be in the wedding party.” Regulus declared, eager to change the subject.

“I wouldn’t count on it,” Snape replied. “James will probably want your brother as his best man, I’ll be lucky to get you on the guest list.”

“Pity, I would have lived for the drama,” he stated sardonically.

“Perhaps you’d like to be the maid of honor? The position is still open.” Snape suggested drily.

Regulus laughed. “Oh, I would have, but the maid of honor’s role is to marry the groom if the bride backs out; and knowing you, there’s a distinct possibility I’d be the one marrying Potter.”

After the first week of classes, Snape met with James to spar, and try to learn advanced combat dueling. There was only so much to be gleaned from the library, so they created an obstacle course and fired curses at each other.

As they panted out of breath, their faces flushed, James took out a pair of goblets from his bag and cast Aguamenti. 

Snape told James of the initiation, and they agreed to inform Moody through the journal. When they had written the message, there was no response.

“Suppose he didn’t get it?” James wondered.

Instantly, they received a reply, “Report your findings in next update, constant vigilance.”

James closed the book. “This is it. Are you nervous?”

Snape shook her head. “I should be,” she replied, “But really I just feel numb.”

“I wonder if you will have to bring your own mask, or they’re provided to you.” James mused. “By the way, Dumbledore’s having me report to him as well, not just about us, but student activity and the like.”

“So he had a reason for making you Head Boy after all,” Snape concluded.

“Well, I’m also the best choice, top marks, Quidditch Captain, devastatingly good looks,” he grinned.

“Because that was part of the qualifications,” Snape drawled.

“You never know, maybe it is!” James laughed.

Samhain couldn’t arrive sooner. 

Snape stayed for the feast, so she was accounted for, then quietly snuck out of the castle. It seems she was not alone, she saw a few of the members of the former student group making their exits. She gave them a quick nod, then walked out of Hogsmeade to apparated to the designated location. She had received her robe and mask in the post (discreetly packed into an empty king sized box of Blood Lollipops), so she placed it over her robes and apparated.

Once she arrived at the woods somewhere in Suffolk, she noticed a group of four other people were present. Snape thought it was a bit smaller than she expected, but assumed she was early.

“You’re late,” said the largest Death Eater, and whom Snape assumed was the leader of the group.

“Let’s get started then,” he continued. “We’ll start with a few ground rules. You are to follow orders, any disobedience will be punished. No one is expendable, remember that. Second, no names. You aren’t here to make friends. We know who you are, you do not need to know us, that information is earned. And I’d advise you to do the same if you have any self-preservation.”

He cleared his throat. “Today’s mission is going to be a trial run, of sorts. There’s a house in the distance. Inside is a family of three, a man, a woman, and their daughter. I need you to make an example of them without tipping off the authorities, no survivors.”

As they marched to the house, Snape steadied herself. It was one thing to torture her fellow classmates, but murder? 

The noticed their leader had disappeared. It seems he had left them to their own devices.

One of the larger Death Eaters kicked open the door, causing the woman to scream.

The other three started casting spells, judging from the wand movements and color, blasting spells. The cozy living room was destroyed as the television was smashed in, the photographs on the mantle shattered, and the furniture slashed open. The man sheilded his wife from the barrage, and received a large cut on his back causing him to howl in pain as he crumpled to the ground. The daughter cowered behind the couch.

“What have we here?” One of the larger Death Eaters purred, standing over the girl. She whimpered, and he kicked her in the stomach. As the mother pleaded for them to spare her child, he dragged her by the hair to the center of the room. 

“I think we could have some fun with her, don’t you boys?” He barked. A few of them chuckled. As the mother screamed, one of the smaller Death Eaters cast the Cruciatus on the girl, causing her to convulse. The rest laughed. 

The Death Eater who grabbed the girl by the hair dropped her to the ground, raising his wand. “Imperio,” he hoarsely whispered.

As the girl’s eyes glazed over, Snape quietly approached them, along with the others. She could hear the other woman crying. 

Swiftly, Snape took out her wand. “Avada Kedavra,” she shouted directly at the girl, a clean shot.

As the mother screamed, Snape turned to her, and shot a Killing Curse straight at her chest, she collapsed to the ground, splayed out.

“Oi, what was that for?” One of the other Death Eaters shouted.

“No fair!” Another agreed. 

There were murmurs of disgruntlement until the leader of the group walked into the sitting room, leading to instant silence.

“Alright lads, not bad, but could have been better. Someone go out and try to cast the Mark. You there, the straggler, I’d like a word with you.”

As the others left, she was left alone with a Death Eater, and three corpses.

“Mask off,” he commanded.

Nervously, Snape undid her mask.

“What you did today was effective, and efficient. You did follow the mission objectives. But, most people don’t join the Death Eaters just to follow orders to the letter. If you’re going to work well in a team, you’re going to have to learn to compromise.”

“I wasn’t aware you encouraged such behavior,” Snape bristled. 

“It depends. If it was just torture, I see nothing wrong in his behavior. You are to act in reaction to your team and communicate, not proactively on what you suspect.”

“I understand,” Snape nodded.

“Good.” He took off his own mask to reveal an older man in his fifties, blond thinning hair, and a straight nose. “I suppose you’ve earned it. Corban Yaxley,” he gave a light bow of his head.

“Severa Snape,” she returned.

“I’m well aware, we’ve heard of you. You’ll have to accept a few more of these smash and grabs, but I think you are capable of leading missions in a few months.”

“Will there be additional training, or will we be going in blind again?” Snape asked.

“Ever so eager, aren’t you?” Yaxley teased. “Well, if you reach the next level, you have a chance to duel members of the Inner Circle. I’m sure you won’t be as eager when your on the end of the wand of Bellatrix Lestrange!” He laughed cruelly.

“Am I dismissed, Sir?” Snape asked.

“Yes, girl. Go back to school. Oh, I’d keep your schedule open if I were you, I hear the Dark Lord wants a word with you and your husband once you graduate.”

Snape nodded, then left the house. Overhead, she saw the sickly green hue of the Dark Mark above the house. Quickly, she took off her Death Eater robes and shrunk them, along with her mask, in her pocket and apparated back to Hogsmeade.

When she returned to the castle, she found James by the tunnel entrance, waiting for her. 

Snape grabbed his hand, leading him to the annex. Shakily, she recounted the night’s events as James listened.

“Oh, Vera.” James replied sympathetically. He ran his hand affectionately over her shoulder, then pulled her in for a hug. Quickly, she wiped her tears, but let him hold her. He rocked her gently, stroking her hair.

As he let go, he grabbed the book. “We’ll tell Moody right away, but I don’t think we should mention you murdering those people,” said James.

“If you think so” she relented. She paused, thinking about what Yaxley said. “What do you think he meant, that the Dark Lord wanted to see us?”

James looked up from his book. “Perhaps he wants to recruit us both, as a package. It would increase his clout having a high profile Light family on his side.”

“I just hope you can handle it,” Snape muttered. “We’re going to have to start Legimency lessons for you. With any luck, you should be passable by graduation.”

“I’ll schedule you in with the unlimited time I have after Quidditch practice and Head Boy duties,” James drawled.

“Just tell everyone you’re studying with me for NEWTS. You have already set up a study plan, haven’t you?”

James groaned. “Merlin! I’d completely forgotten about NEWTS!”

The months passed. Snape found the year slipping by. 

She was leaving her NEWT Charms class when noticed Sirius waiting outside.

“What do you want, Black?” Snape asked irritably.

“We need to talk. Walk with me to the Great Hall?”

Snape kept her guard, but followed along.

“I’ve been thinking, and if you are the person James wants in his life, for some god forsaken reason, then I’m going to have to accept it.” Sirius stated.

“That’s very mature of you, Sirius.” Snape replied.

“Oh? It’s Sirius now?” He asked.

“I guess it has to be. Make no mistake, I still despise you, but I’m willing to forgive.”

“How generous of you,” Sirius replied sarcastically.

“It is,” Snape agreed. “You’re too important to James for me to hold onto this animosity, and if you are willing to be civil, so am I.”

“And Moony? Are you willing to be civil to him too?”

“...Yes, I believe so. I have no quarrel with Lupin, not really. But you do understand that I’m not required to be friendly to him.”

“I wouldn’t expect anything from you,” Sirius snarked.

Sirius regained his composure and looked her directly in the eyes. “So it’s settled then, we were debating over whether or not to join the wedding party, but if you are really planning to turn a new leaf, you can expect us there.”

“I’m glad to hear that. James would have been devastated if the three of you didn’t show up because of me.” Snape paused. “There is one favor I want to ask. I was planning on inviting your brother as well.”

Sirius’s face went dark. “If you must, but I won’t speak to him. I’m not sure if you were aware, but he’s not my brother anymore.” With that, he decided to turn in the other direction.

“Weren’t you going to the Great Hall?” Snape asked.

“I’m not hungry anymore,” Sirius replied. “See you around, Vera. Hopefully not until the wedding!”

Snape thought that was the last of it, and she spent the rest of the year focused on helping James with Legimency, studying, Prefect duties, and trying not to fall asleep at his Quidditch games. It was a miracle James didn’t fall off his broom from his own lack of sleep. Needless to say, Gryffindor did not win the Quidditch cup that year.

Her only regret was letting things end so badly with Lily. She wanted to reach out, but knew she couldn’t. It was incredibly awkward having to attend the monthly Prefect meetings, and barely made eye contact with her.

It wasn’t until Lily asked her to help place the desks back in order after the February meeting that confrontation was unavoidable.

Snape would have preferred silence, but Lily was the first to speak. 

“Happy belated birthday. I wanted to give you something, but…”

“There’s no need. I missed your birthday too.”

Lily chewed her lip, and looked briefly at Snape, before glancing away. “Vera, I’ve missed you.”

Snape didn’t really know what to say. She should push her away, but she didn’t want to.

Lily continued. “Look, I don’t care if you don’t feel anything for me any more, but I missed our friendship, I missed us. And if it means having to see you with Potter, I don’t mind.”

Snape prodded, “Do you still love him?”

Lily frowned. “That doesn’t matter any more. I just want to know that there’s a chance we can rebuild what we had. It’s not too late, is it?”

“No,” Snape replied softly, “it’s never too late.”

Lily let out a sob, then rushed into her arms. They embraced, and let go.

“I’d love to be your Maid of Honor, if you’ll still have me,” Lily murmured.

“Of course,” Snape answered. She gently kissed her forehead and smelled her hair. She felt an icy grip of guilt, knowing that if Lily knew the truth, she would never be this close to her.

The year ended with little fanfare. NEWTS were exactly as they were labeled, nasty and exhausting. Snape spent hours cramming with James, and unfortunately, his friends. After their truce she had to accept they would be a part of her life for good. The Leaving Feast was uneventful, Ravenclaw won the House Cup.

As per tradition, the graduating class stepped onto the rowboats to take one last look at the castle entombed in the night sky, the lights of the turrets shining bright. 

James shared a boat with Snape, and clasped her hand in his. “I’m going to miss it, now that it’s over,” he declared.

“I’m not.” Snape replied. “I’m ready to move on.”

They rented a flat in London. It was a bedsit in the same building as Sirius. Now that he was out of the school robes, he started dressing in Muggle hooligan clothes, like those punks she had heard about. He’d convince James to come out with him to dive bars and nightclubs. While they were gone, Snape would sneak out and report for her duties. They would come back hungover, she would come back bleeding, and James would send his dispatch while Sirius was asleep on the futon. It was the perfect arrangement. 

One day, Sirius announced he had bought an old busted up motorbike, and he was going to repair it back to its former glory.

“You can’t believe how lucky I was, Prongs! A ‘67 Bonneville Triumph, in near perfect condition! Well, almost perfect. Almost working order. And I’m going to make it better.” 

She could see James’s eyes light up, and soon they were renting a garage in the country and ordering parts. As they conspired about flying mechanisms over tea and biscuits, Snape asked about the practicality of a flying death trap.

“For one thing, you could be seen,” she argued.

“Then we’ll have to create a cloaking device,” Sirius concluded. 

“What about the noise?” She asked irritably.

“Silencing charms! This is very productive, Snape, keep going!” 

She scowled, and remained silent.

The rest of the summer was spent testing enchantments, reading through technical jargon on multi-layered enchanting and metallurgy, failing, and trying again. Of course, she enjoyed watching them fail, but found herself surprised when one afternoon in August, the bike was flying ten feet off the ground. 

Sirius gave a whoop, and flew around in circles. He had James hold onto him and they flew around the expanse of farmland around the garage. Once they landed, Sirius even offered her a ride.

“No thank you, I’d rather live.” Snape replied.

“She’s afraid of heights,” James teased.

“Then you have to go, the Muggles call it exposure therapy,” Sirius urged.

Before she could protest, James hoisted her onto the bike.

“Hold on tight,” Sirius instructed, before ascending. Snape grabbed onto him tightly and screamed.

The wedding was to be held in September. There was no reason as to why they picked the date, it was when the church was free and few Muggles would be around until Christmas 

It was an unusually warm afternoon in Cokeworth. The August heat lead into a balmy autumn. The leaves were only beginning to change color, pale yellows and reds.

Snape waited in the bridal suite of the church she had attended for most of her childhood, under her father’s orders and mother’s ambivalence. God, she hated this place. Why did she agree to this?

James rushed into the suite with a box in hand. He was wearing the blue suit he had described before, but it was less terrible in person. It was a deep midnight blue, with black lapels, and a black velvet bow tie. James was the type of handsome that could pull off anything, but the cut of the fabric and the bold color matched his frenetic yet casual energy.

“It’s bad luck for you to see the bride on her wedding day.” Snape chided.

“Like you were one for superstition,” James scoffed.

He placed the box onto an old wooden dresser. 

“Just arrived from Paris,” he added cheerfully. “From the Yves Saint Laurent Winter collection.”

It was a beautiful two piece evening ensemble, the top consisting of a white lace blouse with long sleeves, a delicate ruffled neck collar, and a scallloped hem. The neck and sleeves were tied together with black velvet ribbons, and the piece was paired with a long, straight black velvet skirt. It was elegant, yet practical.

“I knew you wouldn’t want to wear a completely white frilly dress,” James added.

“Oh James, this is much too nice. The witches out there won’t know it’s designer, and my Muggle relatives are too poor to care. This is frightfully expensive and would hardly impress anyone.”

“Well, I didn’t buy it for them. Do you like it?” he asked.

“I think it’s a bit late to say I hate it.” Snape ran her fingers over the delicate lacework. “I’ll wear it. Did you buy a veil?” 

James produced a second box, revealing a black lace veil. “These are for funerals, but it seemed a bit more your style.” He lifted the mantilla and placed it on her head. 

Snape examined herself in the mirror, before she felt embarrassed by her fleeting sense of vanity.

“Go on then, get out,” she urged. “I can’t have you watching me change.” 

James gave a good natured laugh, and closed the door. 

When she finally put on the ensemble, Snape had to admit, it felt nice. She felt...pretty. No, that wasn’t right. It felt wrong. This was horribly wrong. She wasn’t this type of person. She wasn’t the type of woman to flounce around in couture and marry people like James Potter. 

She was taken out of her reverie by a knock at the door.

“Come in, James. I’ll just get my bouquet.” she shouted. Anemones, chrysanthemums, silver ragwort, and thistle. Pretty, but puzzling in its placement. In the language of flowers, anemones meant forsaken love, and thistle meant pain, chrysanthemums were the flowers of death, and ragwort was toxic to deer.

James didn’t seem to be the type to delve too deeply into the hidden meaning of things, perhaps she was giving him too much credit.

Much to her surprise, Regulus burst into the room. He looked disheveled, his hair unkempt. His suit (how strange to see him in a Muggle suit) was crumpled.

“What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be downstairs?” Snape asked in confusion.

“You don’t have to do this, you know,” he said passionately.

“I know I don’t have to. Anyway, you were the one congratulating me on the engagement.”

“Well, I didn’t think you’d go through with it! I thought you two would break up before then. It’s not too late, Vera. I’m telling you as your friend, you’re going to regret going through with this.” He was pacing the floor.

“And what would I do, Regulus? Where would I go if I just up and left?” Snape asked rhetorically.

“You could stay with me,” Regulus replied, looking at her earnestly.

“In Grimmauld Place, with your mother.” Snape deadpanned.

“We could go to France, or Tangiers maybe. I’m in a bit of a mess, and I’m not sure if I’m going to do the right thing. I could use a friend right now.”

“How so?” She asked, trying to hide her concern.

“Look, I know you’re not some Blood Traitor. You know where you stand and you’re a valuable ally. And you aren’t really as dyed in the wool as some of the other Death Eaters, you see the flaws. But I’ve found something that makes me reconsider everything. And if you marry Potter, I’ll lose you for good.”

“You won’t lose me, Regulus,” Snape replied reassuringly.

“You’re going to have to overcompensate to bring Potter up to snuff for the rest of them, you can’t afford any insubordination. How will I know you won’t turn me in to the Dark Lord to advance yourself?” He asked, panic rising in his voice.

“If you really didn’t trust me, you wouldn’t have mentioned it in the first place,” she answered gently. “And my marriage changes nothing. I’m on my own side, as are you, but that doesn’t mean we cannot work together. There’s more to me than you suspect.”

Regulus did not seem happy with that answer. He took out a familiar cooper ring and placed it on the dresser.

“Don’t throw your life away, Vera. If you change your mind, this will take you to my house. If I don’t see you there…”

“Don’t do anything drastic. I’m in. We will discuss this again soon,” she pleaded. “Just come downstairs with me and we’ll talk it over tomorrow.”

“Actually, I’m off. I thought I could spend an evening near my brother, turns out I can’t.” He gave her a quick air kiss on the cheek. “Enjoy your wedding.” He lifted his wand, and apparated out.

Snape stared at the Portkey for a moment, her hand unconsciously reaching for it, before pushing back. She shook herself out of her thoughts, and headed downstairs.

The small church was decorated with greenery, boughs of branches lining the roof and vines wrapped around the pews. Floating orbs of light encased in colored blue glass illuminated the room. It felt as if the chapel was an indoor forest under a starry sky.

As she walked down the aisle (by herself, her father had kindly refused to walk her once he found she was marrying one of those kinds as he calls them), she found her face falling into a scowl as she heard a record of a song she hadn’t heard in years, Love is Blue, a very Muggle, very 60s orchestral piece. It was embarrassing, but no one made a fuss as the motley wedding party walked with her (two Pureblood heirrsses, stodgily Half-Blood Honoria, and a beautiful Muggleborn who did not deserve the sneers she was receiving from the wedding guests). She couldn’t help but smirk, wondering how they would react knowing they were in the same room as a werewolf.

The bonding ceremony was quick, much quicker than she expected. As they raised their wands, she felt her magic entwine with James’s. It was a powerful pull, stretching in her chest and out to her fingertips, so brief, but overwhelming. She and James exchanged glances, wide eyed and out of breath. This was a mistake.

They lowered their wands, and James let out a nervous laugh. “We’re married.”

The reception was to be held in an adjoining room to the chapel. The decor was simple, white table cloths and glazed china plates, with springs rosemary decorating the tables. There was a buffet, and a dance floor. Beside the floor stood a small wooden piano.

As the guests gathered for dinner, the couple walked around the room thanking them for attending. It was terribly dull. Some of her father’s family did show up after all, a maiden aunt and a second cousin, and Mr. and Mrs. Evans showed up out of politeness, which justified their terrible venue, while the rest were Fleamont and Euphemia’s society friends, who were equal parts bewildered and confused by their surroundings. James reveled in it, Vera hated it. 

Once they made their rounds, James’s friends pulled him aside to get properly drunk, while Vera was stuck at the head table. Her parents were quietly arguing with each other, and Euphemia was off on the other side of the room. Fleamont has nodded off in his seat.

“Beautiful ceremony.”

Vera looked up. Lily was standing in front of her, with a man. A tall, handsome red headed man.

“I’m glad you came, thank you,” Vera replied.

“Vera, this is Gideon Prewett. He’s my date.” 

He lifted his hand confidently to shake hers. Reluctantly, she accepted. “Congratulations,” he added. “You must be very relieved that this is all over,” he joked.

“Hardly, the worst part is yet to come, the toasts.” Vera replied bitterly. Gideon laughed. It sounded charming, and she hated it.

“You’re right, Lily. I do like her. Well, it was lovely finally getting to meet you. You and James should come over sometime.”

“Maybe we will,” Vera replied. “So, where did you two meet exactly?” She noticed the two of them bristle.

“Um, at our Intramural Gobstones League. That’s where we met, you could join us you know, one of these days” Lily lied quickly. Vera could sense the panic in Lily’s eyes.

“I’ll pass, thank you.” 

She watched as they breathed a sigh of relief.

Lily and Gideon returned to their table, leaving her alone. As she watched the two of them talk and flirt, Lily’s hand resting on his arm, his eyes lingering too long on her body, she stared. She felt that she could bore a hole into his head with her eyes.

Vera stood up, and walked over to the piano. She opened the lid, and gingerly her fingers touched the arm keys. She played a few scales, it was horribly out of tune, but passable.

She remembered a few jazz standards by heart. And one in particular leaped our at her

Oh, will you never let me be?  
Oh will you never set me free?  
The ties that bound us, are still around us  
There’s no escape that I can see

She continued to play the piano, the chatter of the guests stopped, leaving a silent room.

A tinkling piano in the next apartment  
Those stumbling words that told you  
what my heart meant  
A fairground’s painted swings  
These foolish things  
Remind me of you

As she continued the song, sad and mournful, she felt each person stare at her, but really she only wanted one person to see. As she finished the last notes, she felt a tap at her shoulder. It was James, and he was sloshed.

“Maybe you could play something happy this round?” He asked.

“Any requests?” Vera sneered.

“How about Don’t Go Breakin’ My Heart? I’m in the mood to duet.”

Vera grinned cruelly. “Of course dear.”

She pounded aggressively on the piano, giving the song a dark, chaotic energy over the happy song. As they sang along it became less romantic, and more sarcastic. Remus and Sirius shared a look of unease. Peter was mostly confused.

Much to her amusement, Gideon brought his partner to the dance floor.

James milled around, continuing his duties as host while Vera stayed put at the piano, alternating between the jazz standards she knew. Other couples had gotten up to dance, but most had quickly departed.

Once the last guest had left, James called out to her. “I think that piano has gone through enough abuse.”

“Did you see that boor Lily brought with her?” Vera seethed.

“Self-righteous prick,” James agreed. “Not even that good looking, I don’t know what she sees in him.”

“I hope she comes to her senses soon.” Vera said gloomily. Sighing, Vera reluctantly closed the piano.

“You know, we never had our dance,” James commented.

“I suppose it would be a waste of the venue if we didn’t.” 

They spent the early hours of the morning dancing without music, then took down the decorations.


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera and James go on their honeymoon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: this chapter is mostly PWP. Feel free to skip this, next chapter will be more story focused

They opted for a honeymoon in the Highlands. They rented a cabin at the foot of Ben Nevis. It was small and black, with metal roof. They were staying the weekend, and packed supplies of their own.

The cabin stood on a wide expanse of field of hilly, olive green and yellow tall grass with dark rippling streams running along the distance. 

There was a road further along, barely visible to the eye, with glints of tour buses moving up and down the hills like beetles.

The cabin was owned by a Muggle family, in a heavily Muggle tourist area, so Vera and James opted to use as little magic as possible; making their tea by hand, lighting the stove with gas, and cooking their own dinner - eggs on toast. The eggs were overdone and the toast was burnt, Vera was never much of a cook. James offered to make dinner the next time.

In the mornings, they went hiking up the mountain. They explored the rest of the Highlands, Steall Waterfall, Glen Coe, Aonach Mor, and Stob Ban. James enjoyed transforming and roaming the wild landscape. He frolicked and ran through the grass and stood on the rocky hills. They were unfortunate enough on the last day to cross paths with a herd of red deer, who in their autumn frenzy, charged at him with their antlers. James held is own, antlers locked and pushing back, until Vera zapped a few stinging hexes at the opponent’s back, causing it to run away, along with the rest of the herd.

James transformed back, clutching his head. “Merlin! That hurt!”

Vera took out a vial of pain potion and healed the superficial scratches on his face. They apparated back to the cabin and sat down on the bed.

“It could be worse,” Vera replied, dabbing his forehead with a cloth soaked in potion. “They’ve been known to kill.”

“I would have been fine,” James dismissed. “It would have been even worse if I’d won.”

“Should I be worried?” Vera asked playfully. “Are you going to run out on me with a strapping young doe?”

James wrinkled his nose. “Don’t even joke about that.”

“I consider myself very open-minded. If you are interested in that sort of thing, I’ll support you.”

James made a rude gesture 

“Is that any way to treat your wife?” Vera snarked.

“I’m not sure. I’ve never had a wife before. And as my wife, you’re supposed to be comforting me. I am the one in pain after all,” James replied dramatically.

“Poor baby,” she replied sarcastically, throwing away the cloth.

James pulled her close to him. “Why don’t you kiss me? I’d feel much better.” 

Vera panicked and pushed him away.

James frowned. “I’m sorry, was it too soon?”

Vera blinked. “No, it’s my fault. I suppose we need to talk about this. Is this partnership platonic, or do you expect to have intercourse?”

“Intercourse?” James asked wryly. “I don’t know if I’d call it that, but really it’s up to you. I would not be opposed to it, but only if you wanted to as well.”

Vera frowned. “Really, why? I thought you were disgusted by my looks.”

“That’s going a bit far, isn’t it? Vera, I think you’re lovely. Your personality needs work, but, there’s a lot that goes into attraction besides that. And it’s fun, isn’t it? I don’t expect you to love me, or anything, but I’m sure we could try it out.”

“I don’t think I can.”

“Ever?” James asked sadly.

“Well, I’m not sure,” Vera replied honestly. “Being touched, it makes me feel uneasy.”

“Scared?” James asked quietly.

“All sorts of things. Powerless, weak, angry.” Vera answered.

“I see,” James nodded. “Would you like to talk about it?”

Vera wondered where she would even start. Her father? The incident with Mulciber? 

“No.”

“I understand. But please don’t feel like you have to push me out. I won’t judge.”

“Maybe someday,” Vera replied.

“Did you feel that way with Lily, or is it just with men?” James asked.

“Oh, I felt that way with her too, sometimes, but because it was her, I could relax. But I never enjoyed being that intimate, I just enjoyed being close to her” Vera elaborated. 

James looked surprised. “Were you two intimate? I’m sorry, that might be too personal…”

“We were,” Vera answered.

“So, it’s not so much an aversion to sexual activity, but an issue of trust,” James concluded.

“Yes, and no,” Vera replied. “I never really enjoyed being on the receiving end, to be honest. But I didn’t mind giving.”

James nodded. “It is more satisfying, knowing you’re the one making them feel that way.”

Vera paused. “Have you ever, well, been with another woman?” She asked.

“No,” James answered honestly. “I never really wanted to have a fling or anything, not that it’s that easy at school. If I was going to, it would be with someone I cared about.”

“Did you and Sirius…”

“We never did that. It was mostly hand stuff, and mouth stuff too. We almost did, but I backed out.”

“That must have been quite awkward,” Vera concluded.

“A little, but he was cool about it. This was around the time you and I had broken up, after you and Lily had left.”

The sat silently on the bed for a moment.

“Are you still seeing each other?” Vera asked.

“No! I wouldn’t do that to you. It’s done, it wasn’t really anything anyway. We’re just friends, and staying that way.”

“Well, you have my permission if you do what to continue with him, or anyone for that matter.” Vera declared.

James’s frown deepened. “I don’t think I want that. Are you planning on seeing other people?”

“No, but I thought it would make it easier on you. I’m sure you have needs.”

James reaches for her hand, and gently clasped it. “Vera, I don’t want that. If there’s a chance you’d be willing to have me, then I’ll wait.”

She looked at him nervously wanting to push him away again, but his face was so calm and understanding.

“We could try now, if you want,” she offered.

He furrowed his brows. “Do you want this? Don’t do this for my sake.”

“Let’s try it, and I’ll let you know if I can’t go further.”

“Are you sure?” James asked.

Vera nodded, and slowly moved her face closer to his. As they were centimeters apart, she could feel him breathing. Tentatively, she kissed him on the lips. James kissed her back, with a bit more energy. Gently, they leaned into the bed, resting on their side as they continued to kiss. James stroked her face, and kissed her face and neck, causing her to giggle.

“Ticklish?” He asked, kissing her neck again.

“Yes, and I’d appreciate it if you stopped.” 

He did, and looked her directly in the eyes. “Would you like me to do anything else instead, or should I stop altogether?”

“Keep going,” she replied.

Gently, he rubbed her back pressing against her shoulder blades, and kissed her lips. His hands moved to her neck, pressing against the base of the skull, causing her to sigh. She kissed him back and ran her hand through his hair, and brushed her hands against his arms and his chest. She wrapped her leg around his as they pulled themselves closer, and she felt the heat of his body against hers as they kissed passionately.

James giggled, and gazed at her.

“Is something wrong,” she asked nervously.

“No, just wanted to look at you. Is this ok?”

“Yes, it’s not too bad.”

“I’ll take that as a compliment.” He lowered his hands that were wrapped around her shoulders around her waist. “Do you want to go further?”

“I think so. What should we do next?”

“I’d like to take off your clothes,” James replied cheekily, causing her face to turn pale. His face fell. “Too much?”

“No, I suppose not. But I think I’ll do that if you don’t mind.”

“Do you want me to leave?” He asked.

“No need,” she answered. “Come to think of it, you’ve seen me undressed haven’t you? That time you used Levicorpus on me, at the Hogsmeade trip back in Fifth Year.”

“I didn’t look!” James insisted. “Well, maybe a little bit, but that was unavoidable. And you’ve seen me in an even worse state.”

She laughed. “Fair enough.”

“Well, I assume you liked what you saw.”

“That’s debatable,” she smirked. “But I didn’t marry you for that.”

They were both wearing Muggle clothes for comfort mostly. Vera was wearing a striped mock turtleneck and corduroy trousers, and James was in a wool jumper and trousers. Both kept on their thick wool socks from hiking.

Vera pulled off her top quickly, like pulling up a Mandrake, quicker it’s done, the less fuss it will be. She got up and folded it on the dresser, and took off her trousers, folding them as well. Standing up and facing James, she unclasped undid her underthings and placed them separately to the side. The floor was cold, so she kept on her socks.

James stared at her in astonishment, then quickly fumbled with his own clothes, throwing them to the floor in his side of the bed. When she climbed back into bed, he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her passionately, his kisses moving down her body. His hands moved onto her chest and then her thighs. She followed his lead, her hands touching him, feeling the warmth of his skin, and moving downward.

The fumbled nervously, asking what felt right, and what didn’t. Both were aroused, it was evident. As they explored, James was insistent on focusing on her needs and her limits. She had never felt so vulnerable, or so nervous as she was that moment as he pleasured her, but she found herself lost in how good it felt. And she returned the favor, surprised by how much she enjoyed seeing him sigh in content.

The event of intercourse itself was a little more underwhelming. James seemed to enjoy himself, but mostly it was slightly uncomfortable and it ended sooner than she expected. She smiled weakly, but didn’t have much of a reaction.

“Did you not like it?” He asked.

“I did,” she replied. She did, for the most part. Vera kissed him and stroked his hair. James wrapped his arms around her and kissed her shoulder. 

“Well, I’m beat. I think I’ll take a nap.”

“James, it’s four in the afternoon.” She got up and hastily put on her clothes.

“Just for twenty minutes?”

“Get up, you lazy sod. We have to pack.” She replied 

“Alright, but why don’t you join me in the shower first?” He offered. She walked over to his side of the bed, picked up his clothes and threw them at him.

“You go first, but hurry up. I’ll wash up in a bit.”

She hadn’t expected they would be intimate so soon, if ever. She hoped she had enough ingredients in her kit to make an contraceptive potion.

Their Portkey was not until the evening, so they decided to visit the Ogden’s distillery a few miles north. It was a fascinating mix of a traditional whisky distillery, a menagerie, and a Potions lab, as the fire one spouted in firewhisky came from a secret formula that used botanicals and a gas bladder from the Peruvian Fire Lizard, which they bred on site. They picked up a few bottles to take home. Fleamont requested they get one of the Reserve labels for him, whatever Euphemia didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her, he had said winking.

When they arrived back in London, a large Barred eagle-owl waited irritably by their windowsill.

Vera accepted the envelope attached to its talon, and offered it some tuna. The owl looked at the can disdainfully and flew away.

She and James exchanged a glance. Vera tore open the envelope, and read aloud the contents.

“Your presence in cordially requested at Malfoy Manor for the Equinox celebrations. Formal attire preferred.”


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Malfoy Party

The Malfoy estate was sprawling and magnificent. When they apparated onto the grounds, Vera and James were greeted by two House Elves outside the manor, leading them to the manicured garden. As they walked past the white peacocks preening and cooing in the sun, they encountered plots of rare magical plants moving on their own, and pixies flitting about. James swatted one away from his face. A large greenhouse stood on the edge filled with exotic fruit trees and tropical magical trees, some of which Vera had read about but never seen in person before.

Vera wore her old dress robes, as they were still her only pair. James wore a burgundy set with an olive green cravat. She kept her face stony and unexpressive, while James uneasily gazed at his surroundings, holding his hand in his. They both kept their wands in a holster hidden in their robes just in case.

The guests were waiting at a white tent in the middle of a grove of ash trees. It seems there were around forty already, idly chatting. Vera recognized a few of them from her rounds, such as Yaxley, Dolohov, Carrow and Karakoff. She even noticed a few of her former classmates, such as Jugson, Mulciber and Rosier talking amongst themselves. Aoife and her husband were standing next to Regulus, who was looking pale and skittish. Among the more prominent guests were two dark haired gentlemen in elegantly tailored black robes, and a beautiful dark haired woman in a fitted set of dark blue dress robes. Bellatrix. Vera bit her lip. She was devastating, she carried an air of power and grace, her crimson red lips and her gleaming white teeth made her look like she had just devoured her prey. Bellatrix caught her staring, their eyes locked, and Vera felt as if she would stop breathing. The other woman scowled, and continued to ignore her.

As they approached the tent, they were greeted by their hosts.

Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy wore matching dress robes in a pearlescent light grey with gold accents. Their pale blond hair perfectly coiffed, their posture perfect. The last time Vera has seen either of them they were covered in green punch.

“Well, if it isn’t the Potters!” Lucius declared politely in mock friendliness. It was the affected affability of a young man destined for politics. He bowed, and James followed suit.

“It is so pleasant to finally meet you,” Narcissa murmured demurely. “We’ve heard such wonderful things about you, Severa. And we would be delighted to get to know you too, James.” She folded her arm around Vera’s, and dragged her away from James. 

“Come on, I’ll introduce you to the others. We’ll let the men talk.”

As they strolled around the tent, Narcissa did keep her word, introducing Vera to some of the wives of her fellow Death Eaters.

“Of course, it’s always nice to bring someone new into the fold, it can be rather dull seeing the same people repeatedly,” Narcissa said as they walked over to the refreshment table. It was piled high with hors d'oeuvres, charcuterie, petit fours and delicate glass goblets of a pale pink fizzy cocktail. 

“Would you care for a drink? I made it for the occasion. Fig and lavender champagne spritz. Lucius’s relatives in France have a gorgeous little vineyard where we sourced the wine.”

“No thank you,” Vera answered. There are five lethal poisons that could tasted similar to lavender, two that tasted like fig. One that fizzed once activated. “I don’t drink.”

Narcissa giggled. “Are you two trying?”

Vera paled. “Oh, no we aren’t.”

Narcissa nodded. “You are a bit young, you still have time. Bella’s almost thirty and she still says she’s much too young to be a mother!” She grabbed a drink from the table and took a sip. “Ah well, more for me,” she winked.

Narcissa lead them to Aoife, who gave a squeal of delight. She hugged Vera, much to her displeasure.

“Oh, Severa, it is so good to see you again!” Aoife gushed.

“You saw me two weeks ago,” Vera interrupted, pulling away from the embrace.

“Yes, well I know you had to be on your best behavior there. I commend you on such an unusual wedding, by the way. It must have been difficult coordinating to accommodate your family.”

“Yes,” Vera replied tersely.

Narcissa left them to tend to her other guests as Vera awkwardly tried to find common ground with her former roommate.

They discussed pleasantries. Aoife described her honeymoon to Italy, and Vera commented on Scotland. They shifted into a conversation about Potions, Aoife asking for her opinion on substitutions and the merits of eleuthero. 

Evan noticed the two of them and approached.

“Severa, it’s good to see you again,” he greeted. He turned to his sister. “I hope you’re behaving yourself,” he teased.

“Of course, brother dear,” she teased back. 

“I’ve heard you’ve made quite a name for yourself out there, Severa. I hope we can work together sometime soon,” said Evan and he sipped his drink.

“Must we discuss that sort of thing here? It’s a party, no need to talk about something as dull as politics,” Aoife chided.

“I look forward to working to together with you too, Evan,” Vera interrupted. “It will be like old times.”

“Might be sooner than you think,” Evan added. “Now that you’re in the fold, as it were, I wouldn’t be surprised if you get asked to be in the Inner Circle sometime soon.”

Vera remained expressionless. “That is certainly an honor, but so soon? I’ve only been an active member for a few months.”

“From what I’ve heard, you’re a natural out there. Especially with your creative use of curses. That blood curse you used at the Jones’s, the others are still talking about it.” Evan answered, for once showing his admiration of her skill.

“I could show it to you sometime,” Vera offered. Why was she flattered? Why did she feel like she needed to prove anything to him or these people? She felt like she was fifteen all over again.

“Of course, your marriage certainly made a difference,” Aoife interjected. “Now that you’re a part of a good family, you’ve reached a higher social caliber. And we couldn’t be more proud of you.”

Vera internally recoiled. Aoife’s respect was probably the last thing she wanted.

“And to think, you might not have even had that if it weren’t for us,” Aoife giggled.

Vera looked at her quizzically. “How so?”

“After you and James broke up, we thought it would be fun to play a little prank on you,” Aoife clarified. “So we were able to convince a House Elf to slip a bit of love  
potion to your coffee. Do you remember that?”

“How?” Vera asked, stunned. “Neither of you were even in school at the time.”

Evan had the gall to smirk. “We made the potion before I was expelled, but we’d planned ahead for Valentines Day. The only challenge was getting a hair sample from Potter. But that was easy enough. He never noticed when we’d throw hexes that maybe some of those narrow misses were intentional.”

“But, you knew I was seeing someone,” Vera replied quietly. “Why did you do it?”

“Niobe told me it was hilarious,” Aoife laughed. “And it was all in good fun. Besides, I knew you two had ruined my engagement party. You deserved a little embarrassment too. And it all worked out anyway.”

“Of course it did,” Evan replied an angry glint in his eye. “Severa just needed a push in the right direction.”

Vera felt herself grow cold. What did they know? Did Evan just want to ruin her relationship with Lily out of spite, or revenge for his expulsion? Not like he had needed to try, she did that herself. She was too angry to be concerned, and made her departure.

She walked over to Regulus, who was sulking at the refreshments table. He was idly staring at a crab puff in his hand.

“What happened?” She asked. “You said you were going to tell me something of utmost importance, then you went incommunicado.”

He stared at her, then popped the pastry in his mouth. “Not here.”

She nodded. “Will you come over for tea?”

“I’d love to,” Regulus replied sarcastically. He grabbed another from the board. “You seem to be in your element here. Are you happy to be turning into one of them?”

“Hardly. I think I’ve committed enough social faux pas to know I’ll never be considered the toast of the season anytime soon.”

“Makes you miss the raids. They’re much less vicious,” he joked. He paused, looking furtively in each direction. “Did you know he’s here? They said he might even conduct the Equinox ceremony.”

Vera paled. “Do you mean the Dark Lord?” She whispered.

Regulus nodded. He grabbed another crab puff and stared at it. “You know, Kreacher used to make these. Mother gave the recipe to Narcissa, but they just aren’t the same.”

“Is something wrong with him?” Vera asked.

“He’s unwell at the moment.” Regulus paused before looking at her directly. “I’d be on your guard. So should your husband. If you excuse me, I need to go home, I think I’m feeling unwell too.”

“Regulus,” she cried out, causing him to stop. “Please, we should catch up sometime soon.”

He frowned, looking uneasy. “I’ll stop by tomorrow.”

“If you don’t, I’m personally going to your house to admonish you for wasting my time.” She warned.

He smiled weakly, and they settled on a time. He made his goodbyes, despite his cousin's protests, and left.

As Vera was on her side of the tent, James was dragged to the other side by Lucius, who introduced him to some of the most influential members of society from Ministry Officials to Healers, to the Quidditch captain for The Montrose Magpies. All Death Eaters.

James was polite, of course. He knew better than to antagonize anyone outright. He held up his own on conversing with everyone, and threw in a few jokes to lighten the mood. 

Lucius seem to observe him, noticing James’s ease as he discussed the latest rise in tariffs on dragon’s blood and how it might impact the potion’s industry. It seems years of listening to his parents talk shop at the diner table had paid off.

“James, what are your plans now that you’ve finished school?” Asked Lucius.

James blinked. “Oh, well I was going to take some time off and figure that out.”

“Maybe you should consider a career in politics. Public service can be rewarding. I could put in a word for you with the Department Of Magical Cooperation. Do you speak any languages?”

“I’m passable at French, and some German.”

“Perfect. I’ll owl you about who to contact.”

“That’s very generous of you, Mr. Malfoy, but…” James began.

“Think nothing of it,” Lucius interrupted. “And please, call me Lucius. And you and your wife must come over for dinner one of these days. My wife and I have been eager to find some stimulating company.”

James tentatively agreed, and Lucius left to circle the room, and mingle with more important guests.

He struck up a conversation with the Magpie’s captain, who was also a Chaser, and they were joined by Mulciber.

“Surprised to see you here, Potter.” Mulciber stated grumpily. “Didn’t want to stay home?”

“I suppose it wouldn’t do to have my wife attend on her own,” James commented idly.

“She might have enjoyed herself more. I’ve never seen her look so irritable.”

“No, that’s just how she is.”

Mulciber sneered at him. “You think she’d be in a better mood after your honeymoon. Well, it makes sense, in a way. You’re such a gentleman after all. No one else would have married her, considering that she’s damaged goods.”

“What do you mean by that?” James asked.

“She didn’t tell you about me?” He chuckled. “Maybe she’s hiding more from you than you think.”

“If she didn’t tell me, then it wasn’t worth mentioning, evidently.” James replied, causing the other man’s face to darken. He was about to respond when the tent opened and the Dark Lord entered dramatically, his robes billowing. The crowd was silent, moving towards him.

James caught a look at the wizard. He was tall and thin, with tailored black dress robes and perfectly maintained, but thinning, dark hair. His face had a pale, sunken in quality to the skin, which was wax like in texture. He looked somewhat in between a corpse and a mannequin that moved on its own. His movements were graceful and ethereal, as if he was floating. As he addressed the crowd, they waited in anticipation.

“Friends,” he began, “I thank you for your participation in this year’s Equinox. I am grateful to be among those I consider close to me, that we can celebrate all we have achieved this year, and in the years to come. The ritual will commence shortly. But for now, please enjoy yourselves.” 

James stopped as he noticed that Voldemort’s eyes were unwavering, still and unblinking as he focused on each guest. When Voldemort locked eyes with James, he noticed that his eyes were deep red, with vertical pupils like a cat. James could feel the pinpricks of someone looking into his mind, idly but not with an active goal in mind. He thought of his honeymoon, hoping to catch the intruder off guard. It seemed to have made him lose interest, as he felt the sensation stop.

He made his way over to Vera and grasped her hand, pulling her closer to him. “We have to get out of here,” he whispered.

“We can’t,” She whispered back. “It would be too obvious.”

Voldemort made the rounds, addressing each guest personally. Before they could process it, he was standing in front of them. 

“Mr. and Mrs. Potter. What a delight. I’m glad you could attend. You’ve made quite an impression, Severa.”

Vera bowed. “Thank you, my Lord.”

“That curse you used at the Jones’s, where did you learn that?” Voldemort asked, his voice gentle and menacing. It would almost be considered soothing without context, encouraging.

“I invented it, my Lord. I’ve invented quite a few curses, but they still need more testing.”

“My my, that’s quite impressive. Especially at such a young age. I hear you’re quite adept at potions as well?”

“Oh, well it is just a hobby, Sir.”

“Nevertheless, we could use a reliable Potioneer. Have you met Bellatrix?” 

He reached out his skeletal thin arm, stretching it towards the beautiful young woman. She glared at Vera, her face full of contempt as she walked over.

“Bellatrix is one of our best and brightest. I think you two would have much to discuss.” He said, formally introducing her. She could not ignore her any longer.

Bellatrix’s expression did not change. “If you think so, my Lord. Though I do not think we would have much in common.”

Vera stared at her, both in awe of the fact that Bellatrix Lestrange was talking about her, and that they were standing so close to each other. She could smell her perfume. Jasmine and orris root. It was as intoxicating as her mouth.

“You are united by our common cause,” Voldemort replied cooly. “I would like to discuss spellcrafting with you personally, I think it would be quite enlightening.”

Somehow, this made Bellatrix angrier. 

He turned to James, who Vera had forgotten until this point was still next to her, holding her hand. He seemed to notice her fascination with the witch, and was frowning.

“As for you, Mr. Potter, when can we expect you to join us?” Asked Voldemort. James jumped out of his reverie.

“I think I will leave the fighting to my wife,” James replied casually. “I don’t particularly have the stomach for it.”

Voldemort laughed coldly. The others joined him. “I did not expect you to be a coward. Or do you oppose our cause?”

“If I did, I would be somewhere else,” James replied, before pausing a beat, remembering his manners, “my Lord. Besides, someone will need to stay at home and look after the children if Severa continues to go out. It wouldn’t do to have two parents out in the field.”

Yaxley interjected, “Perhaps you’d find better company with the wives.”

The Death Eaters laughed, and James laughed as well, “Perhaps I would,” he replied casually, much to the older Death Eater’s irritation. “What I can’t provide in action, I’d be happy to donate. While I don’t have my full inheritance, I do receive a substantial allowance. I’m sure that could be of use.”

Voldemort nodded. “Any help is appreciated, of course.” He turned to the rest of the crowd. “Let us walk to the grove, the Equinox is about to approach.

Outside of the tent was a large wooden altar positioned in the middle of the grove. On top of the altar was a large box covered with a sheet, a smaller wooden box, and some wheat. A sundial was placed next to the altar to indicate the time of the Equinox, as well as a cauldron.

The guests gathered in a circle as the Dark Lord began the ritual.

“Welcome to the Equinox ritual, a time where light and shadow dance in equal measure, and the days grow colder. Like our ancestors, we are here to celebrate the end of a bountiful year. Unlike our ancestors, we can celebrate reaching the limits of what is possible, wielding vast power over life, and defeating Death. This year, we will be celebrating the ritual as it was celebrated almost a millennia prior, as found in the notes of my ancestor, Salazar Slytherin. Please raise your wands. We begin the ritual by offering grain back to the Earth, who we hope will accept our offering.”

He lifted a chaff of wheat from the altar and into the cauldron.

“Now, I call upon the gate keeper of the Otherworld to open the door to the spirit realm and for the ancient gods to grant us their power.”

He opened the small wooden box to reveal a brightly colored snake. It slithered around his wrist and his arm, and he hissed at it, stroking its head and cooing it, before throwing it in the cauldron. He tapped his wand, and the snake multiplied into hundreds. He hissed at his, and the cauldron moved from the pressure of the snakes.

Voldemort continued the incantation in his hissing noises, and Vera could feel a vibration from the tips of her fingers, deep inside her body. He slipped into what sounded like Welsh, then back to hissing. As he continued in a trance, smoke spouted from the cauldron, and a large figure of smoke shaped like a woman, with long dark tendrils of hair emerged from the cauldron, howling.

He raised his wand and flicked off the cloth over the box to reveal a cage. Inside was a young woman, her wrists and legs tied together. Her fingers were twitching, a sign of long term nerve damage from the Cruciatus. With a wave of his wand, he opened the latch and lifted her out into the air. She screamed as she was lowered into the cauldron, the smoky figure grasping at her legs and pulling her in as the snakes encircled her body.

As the woman met her end, the creature began to grow more opaque, growing larger and louder, until there was nothing left in the cauldron at all. With a rumble, it shook the ground, swirling as it divided, and retreated into each guest’s wand. It was a sickening sensation of heady Dark magic absorbed directly into one’s being. It was exhilarating, leaving one to feel lightheaded and heavy all at once. Some of the guests gave out a yell, some laughed. James looked like he was about to vomit.

The Dark Lord finished his incantation, and the vibrations from the cauldron stopped. The sensation remained.

“Thank you for participating in this ritual. The strength of its power should help us defeat those who oppose us, and free ourselves from our mortal limitations. I will see all of you again at our next meeting,” Voldemort concluded, bowing his head. 

Lucius spoke up. “A House Elf will be present to escort you to our Floo. At this state, it’s not recommended to apparate.”

Vera steadied James as he regained his composure, groaning as he gripped his head. “That feels worse than any hangover I’ve ever had.”

Vera thought it felt better than anything she’d ever felt before. It was like falling in love all over again.

They waited in line for the floo to open, and were greeted by an eerily smiling Bellatrix and her husband.

“Go ahead darling, I’m going to say farewell to our new friends.”

He nodded, looking at the young couple skeptically and stepping into the fireplace.

“Why don’t you let me help you? It seems it might have been too much for ickle Jamsie. Poor dear, not used to rituals, are we? It gets better.”

She caressed his sweaty brow, and he flinched. She cackled. She handed him the floo powder, and helped him in the fireplace. 

“Go ahead, I just want a quick word with your wife. She will follow you soon enough.”

James protested, but Vera wordlessly urged him to go. Too weak to argue, he left, disappearing in the smoke.

Bellatrix dropped her smile, allowing it to turn to a sneer. “The Dark Lord might be taken with you for now, but remember, you have no hold over him. He is mine. Just because you are another woman in our ranks doesn’t mean we are the same. You can marry a weak willed boy like Potter, but you are not one of us. Know your place. Have I made myself clear?”

“Perfectly,” Vera replied acidly. Vera hated how much she hated her, and how she found her so beautiful.

Bellatrix smiled. “Good. Now get out of my sight. You disgust me.”

She shoved the floo powder in her hand and into the fireplace. Vera shouted her address and landed in her living room. James wordlessly helped her out of the fireplace and they dusted the soot off their robes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is based off of some Equinox rituals that do exist, but I took out any recognizable traits and made it more appropriate for the Death Eaters rather than modern Muggle pagans. Even so I apologize for any possible offense. This is for artistic license.


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera finds out Regulus’s secret, and tells James one of her own

When Regulus failed to show up for tea, Vera kept to her word and flooed to the Black residence.

When she stepped through the fireplace, she was greeted by a curse narrowly missing her face.

“And what do I have the pleasure of this visit?” Walburga asked heatedly.

“Ah, Mrs. Black. Is your son at home?”

“I have no son that would want to see you, Mrs. Potter,” Walburga growled. “If you would so kindly leave my presence you half-blood filth, perhaps I will give you the courtesy to miss my next shot.”

Vera grabbed her wand. “Try me. I think this will be most amusing.”

Walburga Black was not a woman to back down, but she was also not a woman willing to blast up her own sitting room. It would take ages to reupholster the furniture.

“He’s in his room. But I haven’t the foggiest as to why he’d associate with a hussy like yourself.”

“I suppose he see in me the same potential the Dark Lord sees,” Vera replied casually as she marched out the sitting room and up the stairs.

Vera scoffed as she walked past Sirius’s room, and headed straight to Regulus’s pounding on the door.

The door opened, and she felt someone on the other side pulling her in.

“What are you doing here? Are you insane? You could get us both killed!” Regulus whispered angrily.

“You said you were going to come over and discuss what’s bothering you,” Vera whispered back irritably.

“Ah, that. I changed my mind, you’re not getting involved.”

“Really, Regulus? After everything, you don’t trust me?” Vera asked sharply. She felt insulted.

Regulus looked uneasy, looking away from her. “It’s...not that I don’t trust you, it’s too dangerous. What I’ve been planning, it’s certain death.”

“And you think I couldn’t handle it? Regulus, we face danger every week.” Vera replied condescendingly.

“That’s exactly why I can’t tell you!” He shouted, before lowering his voice back to a hoarse whisper, his eyes shifting in fear. “I can’t talk about it. There’s too many ears, too many eyes listening. The portraits, my mother…”

“Then come with me, let’s take a walk outside. Do you have any Muggle clothes?” Vera asked.

“Just what I wear to the train station, why?”

“Then get dressed.” 

Regulus opened his closet and found a ridiculous pair of orange trousers, a ruffled magenta shirt, and a green vest.

“Do you really wear that to the station?” Vera asked.

“What? Mother picks my clothes for me, and she says this is what Muggles wear, or someone told her that. Anyway, it worked when I went last year. What’s this all for?”

Vera opened the window and looked down. “I suppose we’ll have to jump.”

“Hang on, I’ll get my broom. This isn’t my first time sneaking out.”

Vera led Regulus out of the wards and a few blocks away to Muggle London. As they crossed the busy streets, she headed right into Selfridge’s, and straight up the escalator to the cafeteria on the rooftop. Regulus followed her, overwhelmed by the sights around him.

“This is how the Muggles shop, all in one place? It’s so big, and sterile. And the lights are so bright!” 

Regulus followed her, losing his balance and holding onto the escalator. “I thought they didn’t use magic,” he remarked.

“They don’t. It’s powered by electricity.” Vera noticed his confusion and added, “That’s a conversation for another day.”

Once they reached the rooftop, Vera ordered two cups of tea and a ham sandwich. Regulus frowned at the less than glamorous fare, but Vera ignored him and they headed to a table by the window. She cast a Notice-Me-Not Charm and Muffliato, and sat down to her tea.

“We are far away from any prying ears, and we are unlikely to meet anyone magical here. Proceed,” Vera said, gesturing at the empty seat in front of her.

“How do you know of this place?” Regulus asked.

“It’s fairly well-known in the Muggle World,” Vera replied, sipping her tea. She tore open a packet of sugar and stirred it in.

“But if you wouldn’t be caught dead anywhere Muggle, you’re as true to the cause as anyone.”

“I did have a Muggle wedding,” Vera countered.

“Because you had to.”

“I chose to.”

Regulus considered that information carefully, and took a sandwich from the tray, nibbling it.

“So are you loyal to the cause at all?” Regulus asked.

“It depends,” she answered. “Are you?”

Regulus shuddered, resting his head on his hands, shaking his head. 

“If you tell me what is bothering you, I’d be willing to tell you a few secrets of my own. Tit for tat.” Vera said calmly.

Slowly, Regulus admitted to what his mission for the Dark Lord entailed. He described what he put Kreacher through, and his guilt.

“I understood when he wanted to put the Mudbloods and the Muggles in their place. But, he left Kreacher to die, and he hadn’t done anything to deserve it.” 

His hands were shaking.

“What was he doing there, why did the Dark Lord put him through that...torment?” She wanted to empathize with the House Elf, but he was awful.

“He was using him like an animal to test out his security measures,” Regulus growled. “He wanted to protect some locket, a family heirloom.”

“But why would he go through all that trouble over a locket?” Vera mused. “Is it a magical artifact?”

“Not that I’m aware of,” Regulus answered, taking a sip of his tea, and wincing. “This is tastes foul.”

Vera raised an eyebrow. “Really? I like it strong.”

“But it had some personal connection to him, something that he would go to extreme lengths to protect. And I think I have my suspicions,” Regulus continued.

Vera pursed her lips. “Well?” 

Regulus leaned in. “What is the one thing the Dark Lord wants most?”

“Power.” Vera replied instantly.

Regulus shook his head. “What is the one thing he keeps boasting? ‘Reaching the limits of mortality’, ‘Defeating Death,’?”

“Artistic license, I assume. We are called the Death Eaters.” Vera deadpanned.

“Exactly!” Regulus exclaimed. “It’s in our bloody name! You know a thing or two about Dark Magic, what type of ritual can create an inanimate object that prevents the user from dying?”

“A Talisman Of Osiris.” Vera replied.

“Protects the wielder’s life through extreme circumstances, and can allow their spirit to be transferred to a host body. Physically, does not stop death. Try again.” Regulus said flippantly. He finished his sandwich, and started eating Vera’s.

“The Philospher’s Stone.”

“Extends the user’s life, it does not stop death all together. What is something that makes it impossible for the wizard who uses it to die, because he has no spirit to lose in the first place?”

Vera’s eyes widened. “A...Horcrux?”

Regulus nodded. “If you hadn’t gotten it I would have reminded you they’re mentioned in that book I gave you.”

“But, that’s monstrous.” 

“The Dark Lord will stop at nothing to get what he wants. And he’s willing to take us down to do so. He’s using us, like pawns. They don’t see it, my parents, my cousins. They just see his power, and how he can make things right. But I’m not so sure anymore. I need to stop him, Severa.”

Vera reaches out and placed her hand on his arm. “We are stopping him.”

He looked at her hand, and up at her face, his eyes wavering. He rubbed his face with his arm and sat up.

“I can’t let you,” he said fearfully.

“Too bloody late for that,” Vera declared. “I’ll take a look into that potion you mentioned. It’s too powerful to make an antidote, but we can minimize the effects. Anything else we should be on the lookout for?”

“I don’t think so,” Regulus replied, fiddling with his sleeve. “Kreacher took the potion, and was left to die of his thirst and hallucinations. He was only able to get out because I called for him.”

“Do you know where this island is located?” Vera asked.

“Yes, I’ve had Kreacher take me there. And I have a plan. We’ll switch it out. I know a man in Knockturn who’s good at producing fake antiques. He even made that fake timeturner we used a few years ago so we could take Trowler’s. I’ve commissioned a copy of the locket, and it should be ready in a few weeks.”

“Isn’t it risky? What if he tells the Dark Lord?” Vera asked.

“No one would know its significance. It’s just a tawdry old thing. The man didn’t even know it was Slytherin’s own locket.”

“How’d you get him to replicate it then?” 

“I had Kreacher draw it from memory. Also there’s some record of it in the Borgin and Burke’s ledgers, so it gave more details on the specifications.”

“They let you look through their ledgers?” Vera asked.

“Of course. My father has a stake in the business,” Regulus replied as if it was obvious. “Bought out Burke years ago. He just didn’t want our name associated with a pawn shop, even if it’s profitable.”

“Just so we’re clear, Regulus. I need you to tell me you’ll let me in. I won’t have you going there without me.” Vera urged.

“I could handle it myself,” Regulus huffed.

“If you try, I’ll just do this again.” Vera countered.

Regulus stared at her, then sighed. “Alright. You’re coming with me,” he said in resignation.

“You know, it’s just like when we were in school,” Vera commented idly.

“Well this isn’t a game. If we fail, we die.”

They headed back to Grimmauld Place, and flew back to Regulus’s room.

As Vera was about to leave, Regulus grabbed her hand. “Don’t tell your husband about this. I don’t want him telling my brother, or Dumbledore.”

Vera hesitated, but nodded. She decided to leave by floo, to not create any questions of her disappearing suddenly. She used the opportunity to blast the leg of one of a rather overstuffed velvet chaise.

“You were gone an awfully long time,” James remarked as Vera stepped out of the fireplace. 

“Regulus was supposed to stop by. He didn’t show up, so I went to visit him.”

James frowned. “For two hours?”

“It was just tea, James,” Vera scowled, taking off her cloak. “What’s gotten into you?”

“Nothing,” he responded grumpily, sitting down at their dining table. “I just didn’t think that you’d still see your male friends after we got married, but I suppose we never discussed that.”

Vera stared at him, mouth open for a second before getting into a rage. “For God’s sake James, it isn’t like that! Can you really think I wouldn’t want to see him just because he’s my friend and I might have things to discuss with him? And why shouldn’t I? You see Sirius all the time, and I don’t care. Last I checked, our marriage didn’t mean anything!”

James paused, breathing heavily. He shook his head. “I’m sorry. I had no right to impose such boundaries on you. You are fee to see anyone you’d like.”

“I’m not seeing anyone in that way, you idiot. Regulus is in trouble, and I think we can help him.” Vera said as she sat down in front of James.

“We?” James asked.

Vera told James about what happened that afternoon, and he listened silently. He took a deep breath, and exhaled, taking off his glasses and running his hand through his hair.

“Merlin,” James cursed. “We have to tell Dumbledore.”

“No, we don’t,” Vera said firmly. “I wasn’t even going to tell you, but if anything happens, I don’t want you thinking I’ve gone and run off on you.”

“You’re expecting me to stay at home while you go galavanting into who knows what to find dark objects?” James shouted, before Vera told him to quiet down, or she’d cast a Silencing Charm on him.

“I’m going with you,” James declared.

“No, you are not. It would be too suspicious. If it’s just me, we can claim plausible deniability and that it’s Death Eater business. What would you do?”

“I could take the cloak!” He exclaimed.

Vera paused in confusion. “What cloak?”

James grinned. “Did we never? Hold on, I’ll go get it.”

He rushed to the closet, and brought out a garment bag. Slowly, he unfastened it to reveal a beautiful silk cloak. Grinning mischievously, he wrapped it around his shoulders and watched as she gasped.

“You have an Invisibility Cloak.” Vera stated.

“The Invisibility Cloak. It’s been in the family for years.”

“That explains so much,” Vera muttered. “How you were able to get past me all those times at school.”

“We used it to pull so many pranks, sneaking out during curfew, heading out the castle...” James agreed, pulling it off of his body and stroking it wistfully.

He looked at her staring at it in awe, and placed it over her head, joining her underneath.

“What was that for?” Vera shouted. “We don’t need to be invisible now.”

James wrapped his arms around her shoulders and pulled her in for a kiss, his tongue eagerly exploring her mouth, his left hand moving up her neck, the other moving down her chest, moving under her robes and grabbing her breast tightly in his hand. She didn’t flinch like before, but she curiously went along with him, kissing back gingerly, and standing there confused as his thumb moved circles around her and his hand moved down to settle on her waist.

“I’d always imagined that when we were in school we’d get a chance to sneak out and fool around under this thing. Just making up for lost time.” He joked.

“I wouldn’t have liked that very much,” Vera replied tartly.

He kissed her again, his kisses moving down to her chest as his hand slipped under her robes. As she felt his fingers close to her privates, she stopped him.

“This is a waste of time. Anyway, you can’t go with me. Only two people are allowed in the cave.”

James sighed in frustration and pulled off the cloak, wrapping it up hastily.

“Is it just me?” He asked.

“No. It isn’t.” Vera answered. “It’s me.”

“Do you hate me? Are you repulsed by me?” He asked.

“No!” Vera exclaimed. “I just get anxious, you know that.”

“If we went to the bed, and tried again, would it be better?” James asked gently.

Vera nodded. If she was to be married to him, she’d probably have to get used to this.

As she undid his robes, James stared at her, studying her face. She frowned, looking back at him. “What’s wrong?” She asked.

“Do you want this?”

“Yes. Now, hurry up before I change my mind.”

He laughed, then started to undress her. When they had thrown her clothes on the bed. He kissed her eagerly, gently pushing her body onto the bed, his hands rubbing her thighs. He spread her legs open, and kissed up her legs.

He continued his ministrations, allowing her to relax into a state of bliss, reaching a threshold where she was almost there.

She bit her lip, unable to stop herself from screaming his name.

“Do you want me?” He asked.

“Yes, I do!”

“Then beg.” He said, turning her onto her stomach, his hand pushing her head onto the pillow.

She pleaded, and he relented.

As she reached her apex, she felt him keep going, and then he too slumped over on top of her. They took a moment to catch their breath, faces flushed, lips parted. He kissed her again, passionately.

He lay down beside her and stroked her face. “Not bad, eh?” He said, laying on his back, his head staring at the ceiling. He took off his glasses and wiped them.

“I’d say it was satisfactory,” Vera agreed, giving a faint smile.

“Just satisfactory?” James teased. “Well I’m sure I must rank up fairly high compared to your other boyfriends.”

Vera furrowed her brows. “I’ve never had any other boyfriends.”

James’s face fell. “Oh, well, I assumed. Your friend Mulciber…”

“Is not my friend, hasn’t been for years. If I could kill him on the spot I would, but I can’t. What did he tell you?”

“He said you two were involved at some point, didn’t give any details though.”

Vera let out a sigh of frustration. “Of course he wouldn’t. He didn’t have any right to tell you.”

“If there was something, I’m not jealous,” James replied. “I just want us to be honest with each other.”

Vera but her lip, and sat up. “I suppose I have to tell you then.”

Once she finished, (it wasn’t that long, really) she waited for his reaction. His face was stony.

“I’ll kill him,” he grumbled.

“I’ve already got that covered, dear.” Vera added. “But really, I’m done thinking about it. Have you made dinner?”

They changed, showered and James heated up the stew he had made. Vera washed up, lifting the dishes and pots into the sink and casting Scourgify.

“Any plans for tonight?” Vera asked.

“Probably brush up on my French? I might take up Lucius’s offer on that Ministry post.” James replied as he cast a drying charm on the dishes.

“Really? You didn’t seem like the type to care about tariffs and diplomacy.” Vera stared, waving her wand and letting the dishes fly into the cupboard. “No debauchery planned with Sirius?”

James shook his head. “Sirius has been fairly busy as of late, so has Remus. Even Peter’s been occupied caring for his sick mum. I haven’t spoken to them in weeks.”

“Perils of adulthood, I’m sure they’ll drop by soon.” Vera commented. “I’m probably going to do a bit of reading on potions theory. Don’t bother me, unless it’s for tea.”

There must be something she could do, but how could she cross reference a dark potion with her relatively limited knowledge? She could start with the fundamentals, but she didn’t have the Hogwarts library at her disposal. Could she really match wits with the Dark Lord himself?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And we are heading for the last arc of the story! I know you might be wondering why I had Regulus have his change of heart a year early, and the answer is I forgot to check the lexicon before writing this. Oops. But I tried to even things out by having him join a year earlier. Home stretch guys! Maybe I’ll extend it a bit longer with a few more character based chapters, we’ll see


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera and James deal with the alienation from their friends and the emotional fallout

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: this chapter has extreme violence

———————————————————————

“I’m worried about Sirius, it’s been almost a month, and we haven’t heard from him,” James said as he looked at this morning’s Prophet.

More deaths. Vera looked over his shoulder, she was involved in quite a few of them. Since her introduction to the Dark Lord, she had gained a higher profile, joining the Inner Circle members in raids of higher up opposition members of the Old Guard. The radicals, the intellectuals, and the activists. Anyone who was vocal about Muggleborn acceptance and integration was on the list. Anyone who was malleable was threatened with a vampire, or worse a werewolf attack on someone they held dear. Vera tied up loose ends. Her job was to kill, but she never got the famous targets. It seems that reward was given to those who were deemed worthy, she had to eliminate their wives, and in some cases children. She was on disposal duty. Her job was to bury the victims and their families in unmarked graves. She would relay the information to James when she returned home and had a stiff drink. At least they could give the family members some closure.She sent warnings, she prevented a few deaths. But somehow, it seems the Death Eaters would always find their targets in the end.

Only the Inner Circle knew the raid schedule, everyone else would be going in blind with coordinates to the location, nothing else. You weren’t supposed to ask questions.

“Perhaps he’s busy,” Vera commented as she took out a piece of toast and scraped off the burnt edges.

“With what? He doesn’t have a job, and I don’t think you can spend all day partying,” James grumbled.

“What about Remus?” Vera asked. “You could get in touch with him?”

“Radio silence.” James replied irritably, taking a sip of his coffee. “I even owled his father, he thought I would know!”

“How about Peter? He’s still visits from time to time, maybe he knows.”

“He says he knows as much as I do,” James huffed. He looked at the paper and frowned. “He wasn’t one of your…”

“No, I’d recognize him, alive or dead,” Vera commented darkly. “And he’s still a Black, they would want to gloat if they had got him. Have you been to his apartment?”

“It looks like he barely lives there, bills piled up on the doorstep.”

“I’m sure he’ll come back,” Vera said as reassuringly as she could, her hand clasping onto his from across the table. He looked at her face and smiled weakly.

James stood up. “I’ll write to Wormtail, maybe he can come over for tea. I’m sure he needs a break from looking after his mother.”

Vera frowned, but accepted it. Peter has been coming over to the flat weekly, and he had been a good source of comfort for James as his other friends had drifted off. Nevertheless, it didn’t mean that Vera welcomed his company. She supposed he was tolerable enough, now that he wasn’t antagonizing her.

“I’ll stay in the room, if you don’t mind.”

“Oh, come on. Don’t be like that! Wormtail likes you”

“I sincerely doubt that,” Vera responded, leafing through a book on Tonics and Tinctures. The benefits of marrying into a Potioneering family, she could borrow anything from Fleamont’s collection, no questions. She adored that man, he was an absolute angel compared to his son.

“No, he does! He always asks about you.”

“I wonder why,” Vera replied. “Perhaps it’s out of politeness?”

“Doubt it, Pete’s not really the type. He’s obviously got a crush on you,” James teased. “Don’t worry, I’ll inform him you are spoken for.”

Peter accepted James’s invitation, he always did. He arrived late, and apologized too many times.

“I’m so sorry, Prongs. I just forgot the time, and I had to rush over here. It’s a wonder I didn’t splinch myself!” Peter exclaimed.

James hugged him, wrapping his arm around the shorter man’s shoulder. “Ah, it’s alright, Wormtail. I’m just glad you’re here.” 

Peter handed his coat to Vera, who threw it on their couch. She made tea, placing it on the table with some biscuits.

“Are we sure we should have her make the tea? It’s still not too late for her to poison us,” Peter asked nervously.

“Oh no, Pettigrew, I’m playing the long game. I won’t do anything until you let your guard down, whether it’s in a few days, or years,” Vera replied drily.

“If it makes you feel better, I made the biscuits,” James added.

They talked about Peter’s mother, who was still sick, and his job at Eyelop’s.

“It’s not much, I’m just cleaning the cages and managing inventory, but it pays well enough,” Peter stated blandly.

James paled. “Must be a bit morbid though, at feeding time.”

“Well as long as I’m not the rat getting eaten, it’s not my problem,” Peter joked. “And we can’t all be a part of the idle rich.”

“Oi, who’re you calling idle? I’ll have you know that starting next week, you’re looking at the newest Junior Assistant to Barnabas Grumby.”

“And who’s that?” Peter asked as he took a biscuit, crumbs falling on the table. He took a huge bite. “Mate, these are brilliant.”

James blushed. “Aw thanks. He’s one of the British seats for the ICW. Basically, I have to read all the proposals he has to vote for and just tell him what they mean in ten seconds or less. Then he votes on them.” And run his errands.

“Didn’t pin you as a boring Ministry drone, Prongs. Are you going to be regaling us with a passionate screed on why we need to have open trade borders and reduced tariffs?” Peter questioned teasingly.

“If I ever do that, you have my permission to throttle me.” James chuckled. His smile faltered and he looked pensive. “Pete, is something wrong? I haven’t heard from the others in ages.”

“They’re just busy,” Peter brushed off. “Remus is fine for the most part, and Sirius is always telling me how he has no time for himself, he barely has time to shower these days.”

“So, you’ve spoken to them?” James asked, his eyes lighting up.

Peter stiffened. “Well, Yes. I saw them last week.”

“Without me?” James looked devastated, but tried to hide it, running his hand through his hair.

“We meant to call you,” Peter stammered. “We just caught up, it was really boring, we didn’t want to bother you.”

“It’s ok. Just ask me next time, yeah?”

Peter gave another nervous smile, his eyes looking more watery and tepid than usual. “Yeah, of course mate.”

They continued chatting, Vera tuning them out as she read her book.

“How is Remus handling his transformations? Maybe we could join him for a full moon, for old time’s sake.”

Peter grabbed another biscuit and nibbled anxiously. “So he hasn’t asked you either? Sirius and I haven’t been with him for the moon. He’s been fairly vague with me as of late, but I think he doesn’t need us. He told me he’s been visiting a werewolf commune and transforming with other wolves.”

James’s face was full of concern. “That doesn’t sound like Remus. He’d be the last person to fall in that crowd.”

“Well he said he hasn’t found steady work, and the commune’s been good to him.” Peter replied, dunking the rest of the biscuit. “Are you going to finish yours?”

“No, go ahead. I’ll send you the recipe. But I just can’t believe it. Especially with the ramp in werewolf attacks. Do you reckon he knows?” James handed the plate over, and Peter took two more.

Peter shook his head. “I don’t know. Maybe? Sometimes I feel like I don’t even know him anymore.”

“Do we really know anyone?” James wondered aloud. 

Vera peered over at him, her eyes angrily begging him not to feel any pangs of guilt and confess anything to his guileless pudgy friend. James glanced her way, his eyes meeting hers. Sadly, he understood.

“C’mon Pete, I’ll walk you out.” 

Peter promised to visit again next week, and Vera saw the first genuine smile on James’s face in a long time. He waved his friend goodbye, and smiled wistfully at his last connection to his school days.

“Well, if it wasn’t obvious before, it is now,” Janes muttered. “They’re avoiding me.”

“It’s probably not intentional,” Vera countered, causing James to give her a look. “Well, it is intentional, but probably not because of you.”

“Why are they so secretive? You don’t think they’re fighting, do you?” James asked fearfully.

“They’d be awfully young,” Vera muttered. “But I suppose we are too.” She paused. “I’d definitely see Sirius join, and Remus our of some misplaced sense of duty. But Peter?”

“Peter would join if the others joined,” James concluded. “But he would have done it anyway. It makes sense. And of course they couldn’t tell me, I’m not a member.”

“And they can’t ask you to join, given our situation. We need plausible deniability,” Vera replied as she stood up. She waved the cups and the plates into the sink.

“Oh I understand,” James responded as he tidied up. He stopped, his hand resting on the dining chair. “But it still hurts. I just hope we don’t have to face them.”

That was the end of that, they assumed. Until they had a visitor knock on their apartment door.

Vera and James looked up from their reading, no one they knew would enter through the door. Slowly, Vera approached the door, wand at hand.

“Don’t to anything too rash,” James chided. “It could be the landlord.”

Vera nodded, then pulled the door open as Lily reached over to give her a hug. She had to do everything in her power not to blast the roof off in surprise. 

“Vera!” Lily yelled. “Oh I’ve missed you, it’s been too long.” Lily buried her face in Vera’s shoulder, and she felt that familiar warmth when Lily touched her.

“Lily.” James called from the foyer. He was standing behind Vera, just as surprised as she was.

“James!” Lily greeted, rushing over to hug him too. James blushed deeply, allowing the hug to last until Lily pulled away. She smiled affectionately. “I missed you too.” 

James have a mixture between a chuckle and a gasp. “Oh? Same here. You look good, Lily”

Vera felt irritated, but pushed those feelings aside. “Do you want tea, Lily?”

She stared at James, who stared back at her blankly before taking the hint. “I’ll go make a pot. You two sit down.”

Lily joined Vera on the couch, sitting much too close for her liking. She could smell her, and it was unbearable.

“Oh Vera, we have so much to catch up on. Tell me everything. How’s married life?”

“No different than when I was single, other than I have to share the bed with someone who snores, so maybe it’s worse.”

Lily laughed. “I know what you mean, I feel like I’ll have to start wearing earplugs around Gideon.”

Vera pursed her lips. “You two are still together?”

“Of course. We moved in together about two months ago. Oh Vera, he’s so nice, and charming, and so attentive. You’d love him, and I do hope you get to know him better, it would mean so much to me. I’d been meaning to tell you, but...I’m engaged.”

Vera heard a clattering from the kitchen and the smash of a shattered teacup.

“Sorry!” James shouted from the other room. “Slipped from my fingers.” He rushed over and gave a pained smile. “Lily, that’s wonderful news. Isn’t it, Vera?”

Vera blanched. She felt as if time had stopped and the universe imploded. “Aren’t you rushing into this?”

Lily frowned. “I thought you’d be happy for me.”

“I...am,” Vera replied reluctantly. “What about Oslo?”

“I don’t need Oslo.” Lily replied passionately. “I have more important work that needs to be done right here at home. Gideon has shown me that I can make a difference without a Mastery.”

Vera and James exchanged glances. Oh God, she wasn’t one of them too, was she?

“Lily, what do you mean by that?” Vera asked carefully.

“There’s a war going on, Vera. A war about the ideology on whether my existence, and that of those like me, is valid. People are getting killed for this, I can’t sit idly by and watch.” Lily declared. “You understand, don’t you?”

“Of course we do,” Vera reassured her. “But it’s dangerous.”

“Of course it’s dangerous,” Lily replied. “But it’s worth it.”

Vera’s face remained impassive. She’d dealt with Order members before. She helped torture Caradoc Dearborn for five hours. Was she still think it’s worth it in hour three under the Cruciatus? Or after sleep deprivation, or poisoning? Would it still be worth it when she’d be dismembered?

“We need more people. People who know the difference between right and wrong, and aren’t afraid to stand up for it,” Lily pleaded. She turned to James. “You both know I’m right, stand with us.”

“Lily...we would love to, but we can’t,” Vera answered.

“My parents both caught dragon pox, and it’s not looking good. Vera and I have been traveling back and forth to check up on them. We have a lot on our hands right now.” James added, “Plus, we might start a family soon.”

Lily’s frown deepened. “That’s no excuse. Peter’s mum is sick, and if you are going to have children, wouldn’t you want to make the world a better place for them?”

“Ideally, we’d like to be alive for them first,” James responded lightly, which only made Lily angrier.

She turned to Vera. “You’ve been awfully quiet. At least I don’t expect any excuses from you. So I can’t persuade you at all?”

“It was good to see you again. Maybe you and Gideon should come over for supper,” Vera replied blankly.

Lily gave her a wan smile. “Yes, that would be nice. I’ve been having a terrible time convincing him to come over, but when I do you’ll be the first to know.”

“Does he not approve of me?” Vera asked.

“No, Gideon likes you. He likes almost everyone. But, he hasn’t had a reason to trust you. But we’ll find some. Would you both like to attend my wedding? Vera, I couldn’t imagine anyone else as my Maid Of Honor.”

Vera swallowed the lump in her throat and wiped the tears brimming in her eyes with her sleeve. Oh God, she was a mess. She hoped Lily would misconstrue her emotions. “I’d be delighted.”

Lily stroked Vera’s face as the tears rolled down her face. It seems she was going to cry after all.

“There, there,” Lily cooed. “I’m happy. And you’re happy too, aren’t you?”

Vera bit her lip and sniffed. “I’m happy for you.”

“Maybe you and Gideon could come over to play Gobstones,” James offered, his voice cracking. He blushed. “I’m sure we aren’t as good as your intramural league, but it would be fun.”

Lily’s eyes lit up. “Yes! That would be splendid. I’ll let you know what date works for us.” She said her goodbyes, and exchanged phone numbers with James. Vera sat on the couch feeling numb.

A few days after Lily left, they received an owl from a familiar Great Horned Owl.

“That’s Yaxley’s,” Vera said, recognizing the bird. She untied the note attached and read its contents, her hands shaking.

“It says I’ve been accepted into the Inner Circle. My initiation will be this Thursday. I am to bring you along.”

James ran his hand through his hair and took off his glasses, wiping them on his shirt. “I suppose it’s non-negotiable. I’ll notify Moody. This is what we’ve worked for.”

The week went by slowly, but soon enough it was Thursday evening. They were to meet at the Nott manor, which was large but modest in size compared to the Malfoy’s. The austere brick building looked over them as the apparated to the designated point, and the dark barren trees waved frantically in the night sky.

“What if this is a trap?” Vera asked aloud, mostly for herself.

James grabbed her hand tightly. “Then at least we are together.”

She took a deep breath and knocked.

As they were led to the sitting room by a House Elf, they were greeted by Mrs. Nott, a pretty young woman with a constant air of disappointment. 

“Mr. Yaxley noted you have a problem with punctuality. Come on then, they’re in the dungeon .”

As they walked down the dimly lit winding staircase, Vera and James held the wall for balance, while casting Lumos. The light barely made a difference and cast large moving shadows. They could hear a cacophony of wails in the distance.

Once they reached the bottom floor, Mrs. Nott took her leave.

The Death Eaters were staring at them expectantly, each dressed in their robes and mask. In the middle was the Dark Lord himself.

“Mrs. Potter,” Voldemort called out. “Severa,” he corrected noticing her discomfort. He lingered on the syllables of her name.

He nodded to James. “I’m glad you brought your husband. I’m so delighted when my closest followers know how to read directions.” There was a stiff silence. Vera wondered if this was a jab sat someone else at her expense.

“Now, let’s begin,” Voldemort continued. “The honor you receive will give you greater rewards than you can ever imagine, but it must be earned at a high price. You must be willing to prove you deserve this.”

“How so, my Lord?” Vera asked.

Voldemort smiled cruelly. “You’ve proven yourself time and time again both on and off the field. You’ve excelled at spellcrafting, which has been invaluable for our intelligence, and in potioneering for our forces. You’ve proven your dedication and loyalty repeatedly. However, you have one weak link.”

“And that is?” Vera asked anxiously.

“Your husband. He has certainly tried, and we don’t hold his background against him. We must be willing to accept those who see the truth back into the fold. But, he is weak, and that is a liability,” he continued.

“How can I prove my loyalty, my Lord?” James asked.

Voldemort laughed, so did the other Death Eaters.

“Are you aware of an organization called The Order of the Phoenix?” Voldemort asked.

“No. Not to my knowledge.” That was true. They’d heard of a resistance group fighting the Death Eaters, and they would refer to it as the order, but until today this was the first time either had heard the name.

“Do you know any members of this organization?” Voldemort asked.

James paled. “No, I do not.”

“The boy lies!” yelled Yaxley. “How could he not know?”

“I don’t know what you mean!” James persisted: 

Voldemort looked straight at him, their eyes meeting once more as James buckled from the pressure of his mental force against him. James groaned in pain, gripping his head, closing his eyes.

“He suspects them, but it seems they don’t trust him enough to tell him. With good reason,” Voldemort jeered. Vera tried not to panic. Had the Dark Lord seen everything? Or could James block him out partially?

“Ickle Jamsey’s ickle friends no longer want to play with him?” Bellatrix taunted, her voice cruel and melodic. “Poor baby.”

“Perhaps they were not your true friends at all.” Voldemort coos. “No matter, you have something even better.”

Voldemort raised his wand, and a piece of the stone floor rose up to his height, revealing a basin on a hollow pillar with bars. Inside the pillar was something moving. An animal? No, much to James’s horror, it was a person.

“Now, I need you both to lift up your hands under the basin,” Voldemort commanded.

Vera placed her right hand in the basin, and James followed suit. The Dark Lord took out a silver knife from his robes, and placed a small incision of their thumbs, allowing the blood to flow into the basin. 

“Do not heal that with magic, let it clot,” Voldemort ordered. He took out a vial of green liquid and opened it, placing a drop on their wounds. It stung, the pain lingering.

One of the Death Eaters opened the pillar and the hostage fell out. His hands and legs were tied, his face blindfolded. The Death Eater lifted off the blind as the hostage struggled. He screamed and wriggled, but stopped when he stood face to face with James.

“Joey,” James whispered.

“You’re one of them?” Joey asked in horror.

“Your little friend was unwilling to talk to us. I thought you could persuade him,” Voldemort urged.

“I’ll never tell you anything, you slimy bastard!” Joey shouted, spitting at the floor.

Voldemort tutted. “I’m sure your mother would be disappointed in your manners. James, why don’t you convince him?”

James looked at the sheer hatred on his former teammate’s, his friend’s, face. He lifted his wand, but his hand shook. 

“Crucio,” James whispered, watching the young man scream and writhe in agony. He could smell the urine as Joey pissed himself. His mouth was bleeding from biting his tongue. Joey spit out the blood.

“Bit shit, wasn’t it? Keep going, Potter, don’t want to disappoint your precious Voldemort!” Joey taunted.

The other Death Eaters grumbled. Hopefully this wouldn’t set off the taboo. They didn’t like underlings crashing their meetings.

James controlled himself, and angrily cast again, his self hatred and anger fueling a more powerful curse. This time, Jenkins’s screams were louder, making his vocal chords hoarse. He whimpered, unable to respond.

“I think Mr. Jenkins was right after all, he wasn’t particularly useful.” Voldemort concluded. “Put him out of his misery, James.” 

James struck the Killing Curse, the green light hitting Joey’s body in a flash. He fell limp, and his limbs relaxed.

Voldemort smiled. “You’ve both earned the right to wear my Mark.” He turned to James. “However, since you were reluctant to join on your own, you will have to be content with your wife holding the physical Mark instead of yourself. Severa, give me your arm.”

She lifted it up to Voldemort, who held her wrist in one hand, and pointing his wand on her pale skin. She shivered at his touch.

Voldemort cast the Dark Mark, Severa remained stoic, but she felt every fiber of her nerves scream in pain.

Once the ritual was over, Voldemort let go of her arm.

“The pain will linger for a few days, that is good, pain is what makes us feel alive. For your first assignment you will get a status report on Greyback’s pack. They’ve been a bit willful as of late. I need you to make sure they’re aware of the consequences if they do not toe our line.”

Vera nodded. “Understood, my Lord.” She looked at James, who was staring at the floor. “Should I take my husband?”

“No, I’d say this is a solo mission. Something to test your mettle.”

“When do I depart?”


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera meets someone unexpected on assignment and divulges her cover. James and Lily talk.

Vera clenched her fist and watched the veins in her wrist stood out from her arm. The Dark Mark was fresh and raw on her arm, the skin red and painful even after a day.

She’d placed a poultice on it, but it was no use. It was a cursed injury.

James has held onto her the night she received the Mark. He cried, and she had no words of comfort to give him. 

They read the notice in the paper the next morning that Joey’s body had been delivered to the Jenkins’s fireplace via floo. The Minister resigned the next day, leaving the leadership to her Secretary for the Home Office, Millicent Bagnold. There was to be a funeral.

Vera left in the evening to the werewolf commune. She was given the coordinates, and apparated around seven thirty.

As she stumbled in the fog, she could barely make out the pinpricks of light. She coughed from the cold air, and trudged forward. 

It was somewhere in the edge of Sheffield, by the Peak District Park. They looked like a normal caravan of homeless by day, and claimed the park as their nighttime kingdom. 

It wasn’t long before she found one of them. He was wearing a thin trench coat and a large wooden scarf. 

“Any spare charge, Miss?” He growled, his voice low and on edge.

“Do you take sickles?” She asked airily.

“Pound sterling, luv. Not that it’s worth much these days.” He leered at her. “But if you don’t have that, I could use the company…”

Vera pointed her wand at him. “I wouldn’t try anything if you mean to keep yourself intact. Would you happen to be Greyback, by any chance?”

He laughed. “I’m flattered. But no, not all of us look alike, witch. I can take him to you, for a price.”

“Then lead the way, Mr…”

“Jaworski. You can call me Jan.”

“That doesn’t sound English.”

“How very perceptive of you, little witch. It isn’t.”

“But your English is very good, all things considered.”

The werewolf scowled. “You British are so small-minded. You forget there’s a whole world outside of your island. Come on then, don’t make me regret this.”

He led her down a dimly lit path into the dense forest of the park. In the shadows and smoke, Vera could make out tents and a small fire pit. By the tents were a small group of people in shapeless long coats, mostly men from what Vera could gather, some larger than others. They were huddled by the fire as the wind began to buffet their camp.

“Okeke, have you seen the Boss?” Jan asked as they approached the encampment. “We have a trespasser in our midst.”

Okeke, a tall man with broad shoulders and expressive brows, frowned as he noticed Vera. “A trespasser? You know not to bring anyone here. Especially not little girls.”

“At least not if you’re going to share,” interjected a werewolf with dark curly hair. 

“Stefan!” Okeke rebuked.

Jan laughed. “This one’s a witch. She requested to see Greyback herself.”

The crowd seemed uneasy.

“What’s your purpose? Are you with the Ministry?” Okeke asked.

Vera rolled up her sleeve, revealing her fresh Mark. The others murmured anxiously.

“Does that answer your question?” She asked rhetorically.

“What does that bastard want now?” One of the other werewolves asked.

“I’d shut your trap if I were you, Kovac!”

They turned to face the largest tent and bowed their heads. It was him. Greyback in all his grubby matted glory. He was larger than Vera expected. His stench was just as awful as she’d heard, and his long claw-like nails were yellow and repulsive.

“Sorry, boss.” Kovac stammered.

“So, you’re the Dark Lord’s emissary,” Greyback laughed. He strode over to her and lifted his right index finger, his long nail trailing against her neck. Vera remained still, impassive. She wondered if the Dark Lord discovered her fear of werewolves and was using it against her. 

“Must not have much faith in us, to send a little girl to tell us off,” Jan commented.

“Do you question the Dark Lord?” Vera asked menacingly. “He’s finding it...difficult as it is to have faith in our current alliance.”

Greyback growled. “We’ve held up our end of the bargain. We’ve yet to see any return on your side.”

“All in due time,” Vera replied primly. “But only if you follow through on your promises. We hoped you would be a bit more efficient in your attacks. It seems that there’s more general maiming, and less casualties. And now it seems you’re attacking people who aren’t on our list, and missing targets altogether.”

“The Dark Lord said he wanted attacks, if they live, then it’s our problem not his.” Greyback replied angrily.

“Not if it means you’re increasing your own numbers,”  
Vera countered.

“That’s a bold accusation, Miss. You do not want to push me. Or else I’d worry for the safety of that child of yours.”

“I don’t have any children.”

“Yet. You smell like you will soon enough, and I’ll be there waiting.”

Vera locked eyes with Greyback’s eerie yellow ones.

There was cruelty in them, she peered into his mind and saw attacks from his vision. Strategies, plans. He was amassing his own force, but he still needed the wizards. He wanted to wield their magic.

“How many in your ranks are magical?”  
Vera asked suddenly, throwing Greyback off focus.

“Most of us,” replied Jan, not missing a beat.

“Any of you formally trained?” Vera asked, looking at the blank faces around her.

“What kind of a stupid question is that?” Okeke shouted.

“Remus went to school,” one of the younger werewolves shouted.

Remus?

“We don’t talk about Remus, Hassan.” Jan shouted back.

“What happened?” Vera asked disinterestedly.

“I suppose you’re going to find out soon enough,” Jan said. “We found out he was a turncoat.”

“One of our own brothers, betraying his own kind to the wizards.” Greyback shouted, causing the other werewolves to shout back. “After I gave him the most precious of gifts.” There was a collective roar of anger.

“How so?” Vera asked. “If I remember correctly, you are working with wizards.”

“Not your kind,” Greyback muttered. “We found out he was one of Dumbledore’s men. He was passing messages to the Order by leaving them in the park bins.”

“We noticed when the same person kept coming to collect the rubbish. Pretty young thing,” Jan added.

“Much too pretty to be a bin man,” Stefan laughed. “Had a gorgeous mop of red hair.”

Vera steadied herself, her knuckles turning white as she gripped her wand.

“Do you have proof he was sending it to Dumbledore?” Vera asked.

“The notes told of our location, names of members of our pack, our future attack targets,” Greyback replied, eyes narrowed. “It’s damning.”

“What have you done with him?” Vera asked trying not to sound invested.

Greyback let out a vicious smile. “I’ve kept him in my tent for examination. We’ll dispose of him once the moon arrives.”

“Well, you’ll have to hold back on that for the time being,” Vera replied in a rushed manner. “Because he’s one of ours.”

There was silence. Nothing could be heard but the crackle of the fire.

“What does that mean, one of yours?” Jan asked curiously.

“How else did you think we were keeping tabs on you?” Vera asked irritably. “We planted him to make sure you were following the dictum we’ve set out. Like it or not, Lupin is staying. Or else the Dark Lord would be displeased.”

“And why should we care about anything you say?” Greyback growled.

“Because we could teach you magic. Within reason, of course.” Vera replied. She saw the curiousity, the eagerness in Greyback’s eyes. Got him.

“We?” Greyback asked.

“Lupin is almost as adept at dueling as I am. That might be useful.”

Greyback considered his options. Jan, Okeke and a few other werewolves had approached him, arguing against the idea.

“I’d like to see him.”

Greyback paused, then relented. He grabbed Vera by the arm and dragged her into his tent. Vera reached for her wand, ready to strike until he threw her in and closed the flaps.

Remus was sitting on the dirt floor, looking worse for wear. His hands were handcuffed, and so were his feet. Judging by the burns, they were silver plated. He had gained more scars since she’d last seen him, including a prominent scar on his face running down his cheek.

He looked up at her in surprise. “Vera?” He whispered. “How?”

She rushed over and leaned against him. “I need you to be very quiet, they’re listening,” she murmured into his ear, unlocking the handcuffs.

“Thank you, but that doesn’t answer my question.” Remus commented.

“I need you to trust me, Remus. From now on, you must say you were working for the Dark Lord if any other werewolf asks.”

“I’d never do that! Vera, I could never betray those I care for and join them.” Remus insisted.

Vera showed Remus her Mark. He recoiled.

“So, it’s true,” he replied, shaken. “We had our suspicions, Sirius mostly, but I never thought you’d actually…”

“Remus, it’s not like that. If I was truly a dyed in the wool Death Eater, I wouldn’t be trying to save you despite yourself.” Vera hissed.

“Then why are you doing it?” Remus demanded. “Because of James?”

“I respect my self-preservation more than my husbands feelings,” Vera muttered. “We’re on the same side.”

“Who knows?” Remus asked.

“Dumbledore, Moody, and now, you. But no one else. I hope we can trust you.” She didn’t care that Remus looked offended at the assumption.

“Is James one of you as well?” Remus asked anxiously.

“No,” Vera shook her head. “I suppose he’s my handler, of sorts. It works with our cover.”

Remus moved his wrists, trying to regain circulation. He groaned as he tried to stand up. Vera supported him to prevent him from falling.

“You don’t have to do any more dead drops, just tell me your information and we’ll relay it. Our system is more secure. Just keep your cover.” Vera urged.

“I just can’t believe it, you and James undercover,” Remus muttered.

“And so are you. You can’t tell anyone about this,” Vera insisted.

“Not even Sirius and Peter?”

“Especially those two.”

“Vera, I can’t lie to my two closest friends.” Remus snapped.

“You’re not doing it for me, you’re doing it for James. The more people who know, the greater danger he faces. Don’t be so naive, Lupin,” Vera begged.

Remus sighed. “Alright, I won’t. But how did you get Greyback to relent?”

“Do you still have your wand? I promised we’d teach the other werewolves magic.”

Vera agreed to stay four more days, the closest she could stay before the full moon.

She and Remus tried wandless magic at first, but most had so little magical training it would be impossible for them to focus their energies on such complex tasks.

“We can teach theory, half of the fundamentals involves pronunciation and wand movement, once they master those we could work up to wandless.” Vera suggested as they spent the next day drafting a plan sitting outside Remus’s reclaimed tent.

“But they need wands to practice,” Remus countered. “And last I checked, it was forbidden for werewolves to carry them.”

Vera looked up at the forest, noticing bowtruckles crawl amongst the branches.

“We could make them,” Vera declared.

“Wandmaking’s a complex art. We can’t just cut a branch and use it.”

“Wandmaking involves using the right runes for your material, and enchanting knowledge. It’s not that difficult to make a passable wand, it’s much harder to make a good one. We’ve both excelled in Ancient Runes, and I’ve been told by a reliable source you’re fairly adept at enchanting. Anyway, with their skillsets it’s not like they’ll need anything too powerful.” Vera muttered, causing Remus to frown.

“I’ll not have you put them in danger,” Remus protested.

Vera was surprised. “I thought you couldn’t stand the other werewolves?”

“I don’t care for their mindset, but I understand their anger. They’re scared, powerless and lashing out at any wizard Because that’s what they’ve been taught. You don’t know how desperate these people are, Vera. They’ve left their lives, some of them have left their countries to try to find acceptance. It’s bad here in Britain, and we’re considered progressive in our treatment of werewolves.” Remus explained bitterly.

“Then let’s put the power in their hands, give them control. Can’t hate a wizard if you are one,” Vera remarked.

Remus’s eyes narrowed. “That’s not how it works and you know it. Anyway, it won’t work without a core. I doubt you have a bushel of Phoenix feathers?”

“You don’t need anything that powerful, you just need a sample from a magical creature. Anything from kelpie hair to kneazle whiskers will do,” Vera dismissed. “Ideally, something from a dark creature to balance out the darkness of the lycanthropy.”

“Werewolves are dark creatures,” Remus interjected, reminding Vera as if she didn’t know.

“Is it possible for them to collect a sample of their own hair on the full moon?” Vera asked.

“Seems unlikely, but if they are desperate enough, they might try anything,” concluded Remus.

——————————————————————

James didn’t think he would go to the funeral. He couldn’t handle it, but he felt this compulsion to go. The Jenkins’s opted for a simple burial, no reception. 

James recognized his Quidditch teammates, classmates, McGonagall, Dumbledore, Slughorn and a few other professors. There were a few other witches and wizards attending of various ages. They could have been colleagues of Minister Jenkins, or fellow Order Members.

James stood next to Sirius, who was wiping his face with his sleeve. He noticed James and grabbed him for a hug. “Prongs!” He gasped.

He cried into James’s chest as James patted his back, trying to soothe him. Sirius composed himself, and remained stoic, his eyes still red and swollen.

“I’m glad you’re here, mate,” Sirius said, wrapping his arm around James’s shoulder. “It means a lot to me, knowing you wanted to be here.”

“Of course I’d come, Padfoot. He was my friend too,” James replied mournfully.

“I see your wife couldn’t be bothered,” Sirius mentioned in casual annoyance. “Did she have anything to do with this?”

“Sirius!” James shouted angrily.

“Quiet down,” Sirius admonished. “Have some respect for the dead. I want to believe you, James, I really do. I don’t want to lose two friends today. But you see it too, don’t you? You can’t be this blind!”

James stared at Sirius, and looked away. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” James mumbled.

Sirius glared at him. “Don’t insult our intelligence by lying to me. It only makes it worse.” 

Sirius ran his hand over the smooth wooden surface of the coffin as it was lowered into the ground, then turned away, heading to his motorcycle parked on the edge of the cemetary. James took off his glasses to wipe his tears.

“James?” 

He heard a familiar voice, soft yet passionate.

He turned to face her. “Lily! Fancy seeing you here. Wish it could have been in better times.”

Lily wiped her tears. “It’s horrid, isn’t it? So many of our classmates have been killed by the Death Eaters. It just makes me feel so helpless.”

James places his hand on her shoulder. “There’s nothing you could have done, it was out of your hands.”

She looked up at him with those clear emerald eyes and he felt guilt beyond anything he could have ever thought possible. He wished he was dead.

“Do you want to get some coffee?” Lily asked. “There’s a cafe a few blocks away.”

They silently walk to a dingy cafe with dim lights and dimmer prospects for dining options. They order two coffees, eggs, beans on toast and potatoes. Their plates have a slimy film on them that glistens in the flickering light.

“The service was lovely,” Lily commented blandly as she sipped her coffee black. 

James took a small packet of sugar and ripped it open, half of it falling on the table. “Yes.” He picked up his spoon and hastily stirred the coffee, tapping the mug.

They sat in silence, staring at nothing.

“You know,” Lily noticed. “This is the first civil conversation we’ve ever had.”

“I almost miss you calling me a toerag,” James replied idly.

“Well, we’ve changed. It seems a bit childish now, doesn’t it?” Lily asked, holding her mug in both hands as she sipped it, staring intently at him.

“I probably deserved it though, for tormenting Vera all those years,” James added, taking a sip. Still too bitter.

Lily giggled. “She lets you call her Vera?”

“She tolerates it. She has ever since we started seeing each other.”

Another silence. Lily fiddled with her rubbery egg on her fork.

“You know, I did fancy you at little, in Seventh Year,” Lily admitted.

James bit his lip. “Really?”

Lily looked at him. “You didn’t notice? I tried to hide it when we’d coordinate our Head duties. We spent a lot of time together alone.”

“No, I did,” James sighed. “To be honest, it scared me. I...knew I didn’t deserve your affection, so I pushed you away.”

“And you were engaged to Vera,” Lily replied.

“I could have broken it.” James insisted. “It wasn’t…” 

He tried to think of how to explain his relationship with Vera.

“I know she chose you to spite me,” Lily added. “But, did you love her?”

“No,” James replied honestly. “But if I couldn’t be with you, I felt like it was penance enough. We deserved each other.”

Lily frowned. “That’s not very nice.”

“Did you love Vera? When you were together?” James asked.

“That’s a complicated question,” Lily parsed. “I care for Vera, I’d even say it was romantic at times, but mostly I knew it was more on her end than mine. I was her world, and she was my friend. And when she confessed to me, I just felt this overwhelming sense of guilt. How could I refuse her? I was so confused about my identity, and our rift didn’t help. I needed her to stay with me, and if it had to be in a relationship, I could live with that.”

“But you weren’t happy,” James guessed.

“I was happy sometimes,” Lily confessed, “But not all the time. Sometimes, we made each other miserable.”

James chuckled darkly. “I know the feeling. But at least you’re with Gideon now.”

“I know, and he’s wonderful,” Lily smiled faintly. “But he’s not you. And what I feel for Gideon is never going to be the same as what I felt for you, or what you felt for me.”

They stared into each other’s eyes forlornly. Thier chests rising and falling in deep breaths.

James ran his hand through his hair, shaking it out. “It wouldn’t have worked out anyway.”

Lily laughed. “No, it wouldn’t have. We’d have been at each other’s throats.”

She set aside her coffee. “And it’s not like anything would have happened anyway, you have Vera. You really wouldn’t have done anything now,” She teased..

“No,” James replied, coming to the horrible realization. “Because I love her.”

————————————————————————-  
Vera thought Greyback was bluffing when he had threatened her, but Remus had also confirmed she “smelled funny,” and it was not a comment on her personal hygiene for once. It certainly didn’t help that she was late.

She made her goodbyes to Remus, urging him to visit their flat soon to coordinate debriefings. They’d finish up the wands as well. As long as they barely worked, they’d have kept their promise to Greyback, and Remus’s cover intact while undermining the Dark Lord and the Ministry. Dumbledore would not be pleased at all, but perhaps that would be part of the growing list of omissions.

When she apparated back to the flat, James greeted her with a freshly prepared lunch and clean clothes. She took a long shower, changed and quickly brewed a test potion.

Much to her dismay, it glowed blue. Positive.

After Vera told him the announcement, James sat silently on the bed, digesting the information.

“I’ll need to borrow some money, of course. The ingredients are a bit on the steep side, the apothecaries are extortionists.” Vera added.

“Would it really be a bad idea if we kept the baby? We’ve been telling everyone we want to have children,” James pondered aloud.

Vera frowned. “It most certainly would be. I can’t be an active Death Eater while I’m pregnant. It’s taxing enough as it is. And my brain won’t function at the capacity it needs to. If the Dark Lord gets through my Occulmency shields, we’re done for.”

“I think we could handle it,” James urged. “Besides, it’s not something to take lightly, it is our child.”

Vera seethed. “See, this, is why I wasn’t going to tell you.”

“Why not?” James shouted. “I have just as much a right to know.”

“Because you never listen to me!” Vera shouted back. “You’re always making me bend, pushing me to what you want. You wanted to get married, you want to fuck me, you want this baby. You want me to be the illusion of a perfect wife. But what do you care what I want?”

James paused, his face falling into a state of self-reflective horror. “Have I really?”

Vera nodded silently, pursing her lips.

“I really have been an arse. I’m sorry, Vera. I want to make things right. I want to be a good partner. Not just in our work, but a better husband. What could I do it make it better for you?” James asked.

“Listen to me. Trust me. Don’t push me so much. I didn’t think we’d be doing anything at all when we married, and it seems we’ve been having sex fairly often,” Vera commented. 

She paused, rubbing her temples. “If it’s too much for you, you have my permission to see other people.”

“But I don’t want to see other people,” James protested. “I only want you.”

That came as a shock to Vera. “That’s not true.”

“It is,” James replied quietly. “Like it or not, you’re my first love, and hopefully my last. I’m not planning to see anyone else.”

“Even if Lily has a change of heart and leaves Gideon?” Vera prodded. 

“Even then. I had a talk with her, after Joey’s funeral, she came over. I think we got closure,” James replied hopefully. “And I want us to be able to move forward.”

“You spoke with Lily?” Vera asked. “Is she alright?”

“Yes, she’s fine. She’s getting cold feet about the wedding, but she’s fine. Do...do you still love her?”

“I’ll always love her James, and I know you will too to some extent, that’s fine.”

“But, could you love me? Is that possible? Or are you still primarily interested in women?” James asked nervously.

Vera leaned back in the couch and wrapped her arms around her legs, resting her head on her knees.

She lifted her head. “I don’t know. I care for you, James. More than I thought was possible. When you’re not being a self-centered prick, you’re almost tolerable. But you have to trust me. You were so jealous when I went to go see Regulus. Are you going to act that way when I see any man?”

“No. I don’t know what came over me. I didn’t think I was that type of bloke. But when Mulciber boasted about what he did to you, something came over me. I felt like I was going to lose you and I lashed out.”

“Oh, James. I understand, I do. I made that same mistake when I was with Lily. I suffocated her with my possessiveness and my dishonesty, and it drove her away from me. I don’t want that to happen to us, but you need to work with me. I’m not going to be a shut-in housewife. I will see my friends.”

“I know,” James nodded. “And you have every right to.”

“Another thing, you keep pressuring me about intercourse.”

“Then should we stop?” James asked.

“Not altogether. But you need to respect if I don’t want it at that time. If I do, I’ll let you know.”

“But, you seemed to like it,” James argued weakly.

“I did, and I do enjoy our lovemaking. But that’s not the point.”

James nodded. “I think I understand. Is there anything else I can do to improve?”

“Perhaps we could be gentler? It’s been a bit rough lately.”

“Maybe we can try a safeword?” James offered. “How about ‘quaffle’?”

“How about stop?”

“That works too,” James agreed. “So that’s it then, we’re not keeping the baby?”

“No. I’m not ready to be a mother. Not yet. Maybe we can try later on? Not when there’s a bloody war going on.”

James reaches over and squeezed her hand. “Of course. I’ll support whatever you want to do.”

Vera nervously met his eyes, she saw they were misty. “I know you wanted this baby, but we have time. I never thought I’d ever want children, but I think you’d make a good father. Maybe you’ll balance out any trauma I’ll inevitably dish out.”

James laughed. “Oh, I think I might give some trauma of my own.”

Vera smiled weakly, then gave him a kiss. He returned it, and stroked her hair. 

“Do you want to brew the potion, or should I?” James asked.

Vera raised an eyebrow. “You know how to?”

James blushed. “My dad taught me Just in case.”

“I appreciate the gesture, but I’d prefer to do it myself. Just be around me the day of. I’ll be bedridden for the next day or two.”

“Then I’ll be completely at your beck and call,” James said affectionately. That sounded promising at least. 

Vera’s mind raced as she thought of the ingredients she needed, the task at hand. She was going to have to hope she recovered in time before she and Regulus headed for the cave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After a lot of consideration, I’ve diverged from my outline. This chapter sort of wrote itself and completely changed the character dynamics I was setting up for the end.
> 
> But after some consideration I realize the characters weren’t going in the direction of my outline. Perhaps I’ll go into my detail another time
> 
> Thanks to Eyikl I felt like some unhealthy dynamics in James and Vera’s relationship needed to be addressed


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first step in the Horcrux hunt. James and Remus have a heart to heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (A/N: I had a bit of a time writing this chapter. I didn’t want to gloss over this part, but I didn’t want to rehash the whole Horcrux storyline. Please let me know what you think about it and what direction you’d like the story to go in!)

The cave was smaller than Vera expected, more nondescript. It was well hidden in a rather popular tourist beach, in plain sight. 

Vera and Regulus met at the rendezvous point at night. It was off-season, so there were no Muggles present. 

“There’s still time to back out,” Regulus warned. 

“Are you having second thoughts?” Vera asked.

“No,” Regulus replied firmly. “He must die. And...if you must be here, you have to help me finish this.”

Vera nodded, and they headed inside. 

“Can you swim?” Regulus asked. 

Not very well, Vera thought, but it would have to do. 

They took off their robes and kept them to the side, holding onto their wands. Regulus wore the fake locket around his neck, Vera brought a small bag of possible antidotes and essentials and wrapped it around her waist. They swam to the entrance, which was blocked.

As they treaded water, Regulus spoke up, “Blood. It needs fresh blood.”

Vera cast a Cutting Curse on her forearm, allowing the blood to flow freely, spreading it on the rock. As it seemed into the stone, they passed through. They reached the rowboat and climbed in, chilled to the bone from the icy water.

Regulus took the oars while Vera cast warming charms. The cave was still and eerie, with a unearthly silence broken by drops of water.

“Your arm,” Regulus pointed out.

Vera looked down, noticing that it was still bleeding. She cast a healing charm, but the gash was too deep to fully heal.

They reached the basin and stepped out of the boat. It had an eerie green glow that lit the surroundings. They approached the basin, and looked inside the opaque liquid.

Regulus took the cup, his hands shaking, and filled a glass. He raised his arm high and threw the liquid on the ground, causing the basin to fall back up. 

He sighed. “It was worth a shot. Do you have anything that could help me with this.”

“Not until you finish,” Vera responded. “I don’t know what’s in this, so I don’t know if there could be an adverse reaction.”

Regulus trembled, then took a deep breath. He filled the cup once more, and lifted its contents into his mouth, gagging at the taste. He braced himself against the basin, trying not to wretch. Then he filled the cup again. 

Two refills later, his hands were beginning to shake as he gripped his head screaming. Vera held onto him as his body flailed. By the third refill, he screamed incomprehensible pleas. He begged for his mother, he begged for death. He shuddered. He filled the cup again.

By the fifth refill, Vera was force feeding the potion, opening his mouth and closing it shut to prevent and from spilling out. His face was blank, tears streaming down his face. They were so close.

Last refill. As Regulus downed the last drops, Vera saw the locket shining at the botttom of the basin. She grabbed it, and placed it around her neck. Gently, she lifted the replica off of Regulus, and placed it in the basin, which instantly filled itself with the wretched potion. 

Immediately, Vera lowered Regulus down onto the dirt floor as he coughed and wheezed. This potion was quite advanced, and almost certainly without an antidote. Judging from the color of the potion and Regulus’s hallucinations, the key ingredient must be hemlock. It would only be a matter of time before asphyxiation or seizures.

“Water!” He begged, pulling her for attention.

Vera took out a bottle of water, and fed it to Regulus, watching as he downed it instantly, begging for more.

She was going to have to administer an emetic, which would worsen the dehydration but was necessary. Then something to delay the potion’s neutoxin, and another potion to open his airways. Quickly, she opened his mouth and gave the emetic, lifting back his hair as he vomited the emerald green liquid. It probably wasn’t everything, but it would do for now. She forced the other potions down his mouth, as well as one to inhibit dehydration, but it was useless. He still begged for water.

She carried him onto the boat, and dumped him in. She was still weak from the blood loss, but it seems she’d have to tow them back.

She pushed the boat into the water and headed towards the exit. Almost there. Regulus leaned over, and cupped the water in his hands, lifting it to his mouth to drink. He sighed in relief. He placed his hands back into the water, and screamed as a decayed arm firmly grasped him. He held tightly to the boat pulling away from the arm dragging him in. Soon there were twenty more rising up from the inky black waters, their rotten flesh giving away their presence. Infiri.

They jumped into the boat, attacking them with vicious speed. Vera raised her wand, casting Incendio as the Infiri continued to scream and claw at them, making a beeline for Regulus, trying to pull him in. Even in his weakened state, he was physically pushing them off, snarling and kicking them. Vera lit them on fire, pushing the remains off the boat as more and more Inferi descended upon them. She rowed like mad, pausing for seconds to cast, then rowed on. The Inferi and scratched her and mauled at her, Regulus was almost half-frowned and covered in scratches on his face and neck, as well as minor burns. It felt like eternity.

As they reached the entrance, she dragged Regulus out of the boat and swam them to the entrance, she cast a giant fireball, holding the Inferi back in a wall of fire, paddling back until they reached the mouth of the cave. The Inferi screeched, the smell of their charred flesh filling her nostrils, the smoke making it impossible to see or breathe. Abandoning their robes, she dragged Regulus to the beach, where he was beginning to convulse.

Quickly, she raised her wand and apparated back to the flat.

They landed in a pile in their sitting room, ruining the carpet. James and Remus were waiting, ready to act.

“Help me get him to the bed,” Vera ordered to James. Immediately, he helped lift the young man by the arms while she took the legs, but collapsed as soon as she stood up.

Remus steadied her, holding onto her shoulders. She removed his hand and nodded in acknowledgment. 

“You should lie down,” Remus suggested, “We’ll take care of him.”

“There’s no time!” Vera shouted.

They carried Regulus onto the bed, and took him out of his wet clothes. Promptly, he vomited again. That was a good sign. She forced a vial of dreamless sleep down his throat and went to work.

Vera rushed over and administered a hydration tonic inserted intravenously. It was similar to the IV solution Muggles used, but it was more attuned to the much higher ratio of electrolytes needed for wizards, as well as a balance for negative energies. (Despite it’s dismissal in the Muggle medical field, it was a genuine concern in magical healing), and a potion to keep his bladder from constricting. She placed a catheter on him and attached it to a bag. No point in modesty if he died from tubular necrosis. She grabbed a pot of burn paste and slathered it on the burns on Regulus’s body, hoping the exposed skin wouldn’t turn into third degree.

James brought out the ventilator. He and Vera had devised it based on diagrams they’d copied from the local library, and built it to function on a self-propelling charm to continuously move the air inside a glass flask, which they’d filled with added oxygen churning inside the orb, which transfigured the excess carbon dioxide, the carbon filtering down to a compartment at the bottom which could be replaced. They attached the tube down his windpipe and sighed with relief as it started to move, watching as Regulus’s chest rose and fall. Remus brought out a prototype pair of compression boots and placed them around Regulus’s legs. He tapped his wand, and they started to fill with air.

They stood around the bed, catching their breath.

“You should change out of those,” James commented to Vera, “You’re soaking wet.”

“And you should get those cuts looked at,” Remus agreed.

Vera protested, but James went to their dresser and pulled out a fresh set of clothes and insisted she change, or he would immobilize her and do it for her. Remus went to go make tea.

James pulled off Vera’s top gently, the wet fabric still clinging to her skin from water and blood. She winced.

“How do you feel?” He asked, not trying to hide his concern.

“I’ve been better,” Vera noted, as she weakly allowed James to slide off her pants. She undid her bra, which was possibly ruined, and threw it in the trash. She groaned in pain, and James grabbed the burn paste by the bedside table and rubbed her back and arms gently, his warm hands gently pressing against the knots.

Vera sighed. “That does feel nice.”

James grinned. “I aim to please.” He cast healing charms on the superficial cuts. He ran his fingers gently over the gash on her arm. “Looks like you match now.”

Vera harrumphed. Her Dark Mark was still as raw and red as ever, apparently that never went away, neither did the pain.

“Lift your arms,” James commanded.

“I’m not a child,” Vera complained as he pulled the shirt over her.

“Just humor me,” he responded as he slid on her underwear.

She stood up to grab a new pair of trousers and toppled over. James caught her, and affectionately rubbed her shoulder, kissing her forehead.

“I just need a Blood Replenishing Potion, then I’ll be fine,” Vera mumbled.

“Of course, but first let me help you with your trousers.”

Once they were finished, James locked eyes with her. “I wish I could have been there with you.”

“I needed you here. If you were with me, we’d all be in this state,” Vera replied.

“But were you really in a state to be doing this? You’re still weak after the…”

Vera grabbed his hand and held it tightly. “James, I’m fine. Is this about me, or do you have regrets about our decision?”

James sighed. “No, I’ve made peace with that. But I was so worried about you. You could have easily walked out that door and never come back.”

“I do that already, James.”

“But this was different. This was on a different level compared to the raids, and if you died...Vera I couldn’t live with myself.”

Vera sighed. “Well, I’m here, so that’s a moot point. Can we discuss this later? I’m tired.”

James lifted her up and guided her to the sitting room. He helped lower her onto their lumpy couch, which he had covered in pillows, and placed a blanket over her. As soon as her head touched the armrest, Vera drifted to sleep.

James headed into the kitchen, and was greeted with a cup of tea. “Thanks, Moony.” He eagerly sipped the warm comforting liquid. Remus made the best tea.

“It’s been quite a whirlwind this evening, hasn’t it?” Remus replied, grabbing a tin of biscuits from the shelf. “It is always like this with you two?”

“No, it’s usually pretty quiet on my front. I’m not out there fighting face to face with the enemy like you, Peter and Sirius.” James grabbed a biscuit and dunked it in his tea, watching as it dissolved. 

“I’m really glad you’re here, Remus,” James replied contemplatively. “These past few years have been so isolating. It was killing me, having to hide this from you, especially when we were never supposed to have secrets from each other.”

Remus sighed. He closed the tin and looked at James. “I’m not going to tell you I wasn’t hurt knowing that you lied to us all this time, but I do understand the burden of having a secret.”

James’s eyes lit up. “Oh Moony, thank you. That means so much to me.”

Remus lifted his hand up to stop James from talking. “There’s still quite a bit I don’t understand, like why you needed to do this in the first place. But, I will be there for you if you need me. Marauders’s honor.”

James gave him a sad smile. “Thank you, Remus.” James sighed, running his hands through his hair. “This is a bloody mess though, isn’t it? I can’t expect you to lie to Sirius and Pete.”

“We’ll cross that bridge later,” Remus replied encouragingly. “But now, we need to catch up. So James, what did I miss while you were being a covert super spy?”

“If I told you any of it, you’d despise me.”

“Then what about you?” Remus asked.

James stared into his tea. He ran his hands through his hair again. “I’ve...been a bit out of sorts lately. We never told anyone, but Vera was expecting. We, we’ll she, decided she didn’t want to keep it and I was supportive.” He looked at Remus. “But I really didn’t want to. I wanted to be a dad.”

“Oh James,” Remus sighed sympathetically. He reached over and placed his hand on James’s shoulder. “I know you’re frustrated, and your feelings are valid. I’m sure when the time is right, you and Vera will have children, but until then you are doing everything you can to make the world safer before they get here.”

“I know, but that doesn’t make it easier.”

“Have you talked to Vera about this?”

“We have, though she thinks it’s not a priority.”

“Then you should make your feelings known. Do you resent her for going terminating the pregnancy?”

“No. Of course not. I love her. You know, you asked me why I chose this life. I’d normally say I fell into it, or that I thought it would be a good way for us to make the best of a bad situation. Really though, I chose to do this because of her.”

Remus nodded, understanding him. 

“So,” Remus began, cheerfully changing the subject. “I was thinking we could come up with a few ideas to maximize our efforts.”

“Our efforts?” James asked.

“Well, I doubt you were going to spend the war as a house husband. I’m sure you’re going to put that brain of yours to good use. The James Potter I know is a master of stealth.”

James laughed, “Too right. Remember that time you said I couldn’t get past Filch without the cloak? I went to the kitchens twice, and walked in front of him, still missed me.”

“So, What’s our plan to get more intel on the Death Eaters?”

James gave him a conspiratorial grin. “Well, I’ve developed a schematic for a Bug we could plant in Death Eater houses. And I was thinking we could expand our map just a little bigger.”

“A map of London that labels the Death Eaters?” Remus asked, his interest piqued.

“Try all of Britain,” James boasted. “But I don’t have all members on it, just Inner Circle so far. There’s just a few things I need help troubleshooting.”

“Bring it over, let’s see if I can help,” Remus replied eagerly.

——————————————————————

Regulus woke up a week later. Vera knew it was a miracle he was still alive, and that it would take a while for him to recover still. She had forged a note to his mother saying he would be on holiday, but hoped he would be able to stand by the next Inner Circle meeting at the Malfoy’s.

“Did you destroy it?” Regulus asked desperately as Vera fed him soup.

“Nothing I do works,” Vera replied. “It won’t open.” It was hidden in the dresser drawer with the socks. It made Vera and James ill looking at it, and the socks were always too warm.

Regulus frowned. “This might be more difficult than we thought.”

“We’ve tried burning it, hitting it, boiling it in acid, running it over with a car, nothing,” James added.

Regulus scowled. “I told you not to involve your idiot husband.”

“My idiot husband helped save your life,” Vera admonished. 

“Then you should have let me die,” Regulus mumbled.

“Don’t talk such rot,” Vera chided. Regulus glowered at her, but continued to accept her feeding him.

“Maybe there’s an activation code? Something that has to be said?” James suggested.

“It would have to be something Salazar Slytherin would approve of, like ‘death to Mudbloods,’ or ‘Magic is Might,’” Regulus replied, referring known misquotes from the infamous figure.

Nothing happened.

“Do you think it’s voice activated?” Vera asked.

“It’s the second safest method of protection, besides blood warding, and that didn’t work,” James noted. Vera poured quite a bit of blood on the locket before they realized it was a lost cause.

“Then if it’s voice activated, it’s probably in parseltongue,” Vera concluded. “The Dark Lord speaks it.”

“He made quite a scene bragging about it on the equinox,” Regulus noted. “But none of us speak it.”

“It’s a language,” Vera replied. “I’m sure it can be learned, at least phonetically. Do you think you have any books on the subject in the Black library?”

Regulus shrugged. “Doubtful, but I’ll check.”

“We could ask Dumbledore,” James suggested.

“No!” Regulus hissed. “I don’t want to be pulled into that blood traitor’s schemes. We can’t tell him. That’s the reason why I didn’t want you involved, Potter.”

“Last I checked, you’re now a blood traitor too, Black.” James snarked.

Regulus scowled, before falling into a state of introspection.

“Are you still going to hold onto your prejudices even after joining the other side?” James asked.

“I have no side,” Regulus countered. “I just want the Dark Lord dead.”

“I’m sure Dumbledore knows more on the subject than any of us,” James added. “Both on Horcruxes and You-Know-Who.”

“Well, I don’t see him doing anything about it,” Regulus sniffed. “And even if we could trust him, big if, and he didn’t turn us in for being Death Eaters, the Dark Lord would find out about it through his spies.”

They paused. “Spies?” Vera asked.

“You didn’t know? He has a few, though they’re not that useful from what I’ve heard. No one knows who though. They report to the Dark Lord directly. Kind of puts those self-righteous Order types into perspective though doesn’t it?”

Vera spoke up. “Regulus, there’s something we need to tell you.”

———————————————————————

When they finished their explanation, Regulus was speechless.

“So, you lied to me.” Regulus declared.

“No, I didn’t lie exactly,” Vera protested.

“Truth by omission is still a lie!” Regulus shouted before coughing violently. Vera poured a potion into his mouth to reduce the spasms and open his airways. He coughed, then took a deep breath as his airways opened.

“You used me.” Regulus snapped.

“I did not,” Vera replied. “You asked for my help, and I offered it because you are my friend. The fact that I am a spy was a coincidence. If you’d prefer, I’d be happy to obliviate you and you could go back to your life as it was before.”

“No, please!” Regulus wheezed. “I’m not happy about this. But I can’t go back to the way it was before. I can’t.”

“You don’t have to interact with Dumbledore.” James reassured Regulus. “I’ll talk to him”

“And if you’re seen? My great-great-grandfather has a portrait in the Headmaster’s office, and he’s not afraid to talk.”

“We’ll find a way. If that doesn’t work, we have a close friend in the Order who can be our direct contact.”

“Please don’t say it’s my brother.”

“No, it’s Remus Lupin.”

Regulus groaned. “There are too many people involved in this already. I can’t stand Lupin, but I suppose he’s not incompetent. But once I’m better, I’m taking this mission back.” He quickly sat up in bed, before feeling dizzy and fainting. Vera checked his pulse. He was fine, but magically exhausted. He would be out for hours.

James spoke up, “I’ve booked an appointment with Dumbledore tomorrow. I’d appreciate it if you came with me, we are partners after all.”

“Who will look after Regulus?” Vera asked.

“Remus says he’d be willing to. Then he’ll stop by and you two could finish the wands.”

“He told you about that?” Vera asked.

“Yes, and I think it’s absolutely barmy.” James laughed.

“It probably won’t work anyway. I needed to offer something to Greyback in return for Remus.”

“I’m glad you did.” James kissed her on the lips. “It was very brave of you to do that for him.”

“It was stupid. I compromised everything. But I wasn’t thinking. I knew you’d be devastated if anything happened to him.” Vera replied.

“So, you did all that for me?” James grinned.

“Don’t let it get to your head, Potter.”

“I won’t, Mrs. Potter,” he teased.

Vera scowled. “Perhaps I should go back to my maiden name.”

“Ah, but where’s the fun in that? I think it’s a beautiful name, Mrs. Potter.”

Vera jinxed him, and much to her surprise it struck.

“Well, we know the life debt is cancelled,” James noted.

Vera undid the jinx and apologized against her better judgment, only to find herself hit by the same jinx. They ran into the sitting room, casting light jinxes and hexes in each other until they collapsed on the couch laughing.


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lily’s wedding

James and Vera apparated to Hogsmeade early in the morning, avoiding the bustle of delivery owls, people, the occasional carriage, and goings-on in the village. Dawn was beginning to break. Vera groaned, she was still weak from the previous night’s events, but she did want to go with James, otherwise she felt out of the loop. They snuck into the castle from the third floor tunnel and headed straight for Dumbledore’s office.

When they reached the headmaster’s office, he greeted them perfunctorily, friendly enough but deeply strained.

“Welcome, please sit. I would appreciate next time if you visited through the proper channels. I find those tunnels can be a bit perilous to intruders.”

“We didn’t want anyone to know we were here, Professor,” James remarked.

“There’s no need for such formality, James. Neither you or Severa are students anymore. What is it I can do for you both? I’m sure you aren’t here at this hour for a social call.”

“Professor,” Severa began, “What do you know of Horcruxes?”

————————————-

When they finished their explanation, Dumbledore looked at them mournfully through his half-moon spectacles. He sighed, looking so much older than either had ever noticed before.

“I had my suspicions Tom could go to such lengths to preserve his life, but until now I never could prove it.”

Vera and James didn’t comment on the knowledge about the Dark Lord’s Christian name, but it was unexpected.

“We’re unsure as to our next steps,” James replied anxiously. “Nothing we’ve tried has been able to destroy it.”

“There are few methods that can destroy a Horcrux, James. Most of them Dark, and extremely unpleasant. Severa, do you have any suggestions?” Dumbledore asked encouragingly. 

Vera scowled. She was a grown woman, she didn’t need to be patronized by the Supreme Mugwump. But, she was uncertain if what she was going to say was correct.

“It would have to be something incredibly destructive, so powerful the Horcrux would be unable to repair itself,” Vera surmised. “There’s very few properties that have that kind of power, since most magic is reactive.”

“Can you think of any?” Dumbledore asked.

“Manticore venom, Lobalug ink, Basilisk venom, and a few curses. But it’s not about what I know, is it?” Vera asked irritably.

“On the contrary, Severa. Your knowledge on the Dark Arts will be crucial now, more than ever. Have you read any books on the subject?”

“I’ve read through Magic Moste Evile, but it doesn’t say much about how to destroy a Horcrux, just that it’s too awful to mention.”

Dumbledore lifted his wand and with a flick, a large ancient tome floated down from one of the massive shelves in his office and onto the desk. It was called Secrets of the Darkest Art.

“I took the liberty of removing this book from the library catalogue, perhaps a little too late. Please take a look.” Dumbledore suggested.

Vera tentatively ran her fingertips over the book, admiring its ambient magic before diving in. She flipped through the first hundred pages or so, skimming through the gory illustrations and gruesomely detailed diagrams before she found what she was looking for.

“So Basilisk venom is correct, but incredibly rare, so it might not be an option for us,” Vera mused, summarizing the text. “It also suggests Dementors, which is frankly ludicrous, and no,” she gasped. “Fiendfyre? That’s madness.”

“It would take an incredibly skilled witch or wizard to even attempt such a task, and many have failed,” Dumbledore agreed.

“So, it’s hopeless then.” Vera concluded, slamming the book shut.

“It can’t be,” James insisted. “I’m sure we can find the venom for a price. It won’t be easy, but anything’s available on the black market.”

“But Basilisk venom? That’s incredibly rare even if it wasn’t illegal,” Vera snapped. “You could get arrested for even asking about it.”

“We have to try, at least.” James replied. “You agree with me, right Professor?”

“I think we’ll have to explore multiple avenues in this case,” Dumbledore responded grimly. “In the very likely event we are unable to procure the venom, we might have to go about this the hard way, as it were.”

Vera and James were silent. 

“Who will wield the curse?” James asked.

“I will,” Vera replied.

“Vera,” James protested.

“I can do it, James. I have the mental strength, but I don’t know if I have the magical strength.”

“You are stronger than you know, Severa.” Dumbledore replied encouragingly, his gaze soft and gentle. Oh, he was good at getting one to feel complacent.

“How would I even practice such a spell? One wrong move and the curse could destroy cities.” Vera asked.

“I think it would be best to wait until we have everything settled, but you can try mastering the countercurse and work towards improving your use of Fire curses,” Dumbledore suggested.

“What do we need to settle? We just need to destroy the locket and we’re finished.” James said.

Dumbledore took off his glasses and wiped them with a lilac handkerchief. He placed them back on his face. “I think we need to confirm one last fact before we’ve declared our mission accomplished. Are either of you aware Professor Slughorn is retiring this year?”

“Oh,” James replied. “Good for him. Why is this relevant?”

“Horace might have some information that would be relevant to our endeavors. I’ve tried for years to extricate it out of him, but perhaps I’m not the right person to ask him. Hopefully before he departs at the end of term.”

“Why would Slughorn leave early?” Vera asked. “There’s still another term left.”

“I suspect he knows that whatever he knows is too dangerous to keep living a normal life given our current circumstances.” Dumbledore mused. “I remember he was quite fond of both of you when you were in school.”

“I doubt it,” Vera replied. “He was my Head of House, but I hardly spoke to him.”

“And I caused too much trouble for him to ever get in his good graces, he was civil with me at best,” James remarked. “Really he was more fond of Lily. If anyone could gain his confidence, it would surely be her.”

Vera glared at James. “We can’t get Lily involved, it’s too dangerous,” She admonished. 

“I’m fairly certain Miss Evans can handle the danger at hand,” Dumbledore replied. “But I will leave it up to you two as to what you are willing to tell her.”

“We have to tell her everything,” James said.

“No!” Vera shouted. The two men looked at her, startled, causing her to sink back into her chair.

“I’m sorry, I just can’t have her knowing what I’ve done. She’d hate me. And I can’t lose her,” Vera replied quietly.

“Severa, forgiveness is a powerful force, and something that we must be willing to accept from ourselves before we accept it from others. I’m sure Miss Evans might be upset at some of your actions, but if she is to be involved in this, there must be a basis of trust. And that can’t be built on lies.” Dumbledore replied gently. 

Vera sighed. “I’m unconvinced, but I guess I’ll have to accept it. We’ll talk to her. How are you going to get her to talk to Slughorn?”

“Oh, I’m sure she could have dropped by to chat with him for old time’s sake, but it would certainly help if I recommended her as his successor,” Dumbledore replied.

“What about Head of House duties?” James asked.

“That would go to the available staff alumni of that House, in this case, Professor Sinistra.”

———

Lily was in a frenzy when she arrived at their flat.

“I’m so sorry I’m late. Gideon and I were called in to babysit his nephews at the last minute and they’re a handful. Not to mention all the last minute wedding preparations, Molly and I can’t seem to agree on anything!” Lily flustered.

“We’re glad you’re here, Lily,” James replied, taking her coat.”

“Could I use the loo?” Lily asked.

“Use the one by the entryway,” James replied, pointing it out.

Lily nodded, and went.

“So what should we break to her first?” Vera whispered, “The fact that we’re spies, there’s a Death Eater defector asleep in the other room, or the Horcruxes?”

“Let’s start small and work our way up,” James whispered back.

———————-

Lily was speechless.

“So, you’re a Death Eater?” She asked.

“Yes,” Vera confirmed.

“But you’re also working for the Order.” Lily added.

“Yes,” Vera replied.

“So all this time, I might have been fighting against you,” Lily murmured. She looked at James. “I didn’t think you would agree to something this awful.”

“Technically, It was my idea,” James said. “We knew Vera was already in too deep, we thought we could make the most of it.”

“So who’s side are you really on?” Lily asked.

“Yours.” Vera replied in anguish, confused as to why Lily couldn’t understand. “Everything I’ve done, I’ve done for you.”

“Really?” Lily asked coldly. “I’d never ask you to murder anyone.”

“I have to keep my cover,” Vera protested.

“But I’m sure that’s just part of it, I’m sure you enjoyed it too” Lily replied tartly.

“Look, Lily, I’m sorry we lied to you, but it was necessary,” James interjected, hoping to deter any further hostility. “At the end of the day, we all want the same thing, to stop You-Know-Who. And while it’s not noble, every war needs spies. It’s not that we like what we do, it’s a necessity.”

Lily looked hurt, but held herself together. “No, I’m sorry,” she apologized. “I’m the one acting foolish.” She wiped her eyes with her hand. “Thank you for trusting me, I can’t imagine what you two have gone through.”

Vera and James exchanged a glance, and sheepishly looked at Lily.

“You can’t tell anyone about this,” Vera urged. “Not even Gideon.”

Lily bit her lip, and thought about it. “Alright, your secret’s safe with me.”

“We appreciate your understanding, because we need your help,” James began.

———-

It took some convincing, but Lily agreed to talk to Slughorn and see if she could retrieve the memory. She was not thrilled having to cajole her former mentor into revealing something that was obviously distressing to him, but she did admit it would be nice to see him again.

Dumbledore has already informed Slughorn about her acceptance of the position, and they would meet for tea in his office. 

“I certainly wanted to work in the potions field, but teaching at Hogwarts? Am I even qualified for that? I’m a few months out of school!” Lily exclaimed

“If there’s anyone who would be qualified, it’s you,” Vera reassured her. “But we need your help to get the memory. Dumbledore says it’s crucial to destroying the Horcrux.”

Lily nodded. “I’ll certainly try my best.” 

She leaned over and kissed Vera on the cheek. “Thank you, Vera.”

“For what?” 

“The truth.”

“Of course, we daughters of Maeve must be truthful to one another,” Vera replied wryly while wrapping her arms around Lily, causing her to giggle.

“Are you two finished? Or will I have to break this up?” James asked, giving Lily back her coat.

“Jealous, James?” Lily teased, wrapping her arms around Vera’s waist.

“Extremely,” He laughed. “Now get off her before you face my furor,” he replied lightheartedly.

“We could share her,” Lily replied breathily. “Imagine that. You, you” she looked up at Vera to address her, “And me, together.” James’s breathing hitched at Vera felt flushed. Lily laughed.

“I’m joking. Honestly!” She let go and they breathed a sigh of relief. “I’ll see you next week and let you know if I was successful.” She waved her wand and apparated out the flat with a small pop.

They stood there, watching the empty air.

“I think I need a shower,” James sad desperately, rushing to the bedroom.

“I’ll be in the kitchen, brewing,” Vera replied, trying to think of anything else.

——————

Lily was successful in her efforts, and handed a small silver wispy vial in their hand one week later. 

“I better see you both at the wedding,” Lily warned. “I certainly think it’s an even trade.”

They agreed, but Lily insisted that they do drop in every now and then. 

“I want you two to get to know Gideon better, you’ll love him as much as I do.”

They made a noncommittal affirmation and promised they would try.

They owled Dumbledore and made a visit later that evening, around midnight.

It was the first time Vera had seen a Pensieve in person. James said he’d seen one before, but was never given the chance to use one, he was practically giddy with anticipation.

“Then I think it’s best we should take a look at the memory together,” Dumbledore suggested, his eyes twinkling. Taking a deep breath, the three of them submerged into its murky, silvery depths.

Whatever excitement James might have felt diminished as they emerged from the Pensieve.

“It is worse than I feared,” Dumbledore said gravely.

“Seven?” James exclaimed. “I thought one was considered difficult enough.”

“The Dark Lord could certainly accomplish the task,” Vera noted, “But making one Horcrux is unstable enough for the soul. Even if seven is a magical number, it’s not an ideal situation.”

“Quite astute, Severa,” Dumbledore agreed. “Our next step is to determine what the other possibly five Horcruxes are, assuming he achieved his goal.”

“Possibly another heirloom from Slytherin?” James suggested.

“Possibly,” Dumbledore agreed, waving his wand to move the Pensieve back. “Tom was always interested in the history of the Founders, even before discovering his ancestry. Perhaps we could look for records of other artifacts in their possession.”

“We know someone who can look through the records at Borgin and Burke’s,” Vera suggested.

“That is a start,” Dumbledore replied. “Tom worked their as a sales clerk after graduating, before applying for a job here at Hogwarts.”

“What for?” James asked, curious.

“The position as the Defense professor. Though it seemed his curriculum was less defense and more a celebration of the Dark Arts.” Dumbledore replied. “I’m afraid he might have been a bit displeased at his rejection, hence it’s well-known reputation as a cursed office as it were.”

“The Dark Lord doesn’t speak of his past much, understandably,” Vera chimed in, “But I’ve heard he picked up his ties to the Vampires on his travels through Albania and Romania.”

“Albania, you say? That’s not much to work with, but there’s a legend that Rowena Ravenclaw was once in love with an Albanian prince. Though most information about Ravenclaw is unsubstantiated.” Dumbledore replied. “Very well, let’s keep working on this, and we will meet again to discuss further action.”

They made their goodbyes, and headed back to the tunnel. 

As they shuffled under James’s cloak, he made a sharp turn.

“I need to make a quick detour,” he whispered.

“James, that’s incredibly risky, we can’t get caught!” Vera admonished.

“We won’t,” James replied playfully. 

They shuffled over to a small office on the ground floor. A nondescript door with a rusted handle. James quickly opened it with an Alohamora and they stepped in.

He strode over to a messy filing cabinet. It was covered in grime. with cigarette butts and empty candy wrappers covering the top.

James tapped the filing cabinet with his wand and unlocked it, causing it to pop open overflowing with papers, receipts, toys, gadgets, and props from Zonko’s, flittering toy pixies, a windup large cockroach, a pair of broken omniculars, and a blank piece of parchment.

“Got it!” James exclaimed gleefully.

“Good, let’s go. Now.”

Vera dragged him under the cloak and they closed the door behind them, heading back to the tunnel.

James cast Lumos as they walked past a yawning prefect. It was hard to believe they had only left school that year.

“Try it out,” James urged. “I want to see if it still works.”

“Very well,” Vera replied, tapping the parchment with her wand. “Open.”

 _“Mr. Moony would like to request that Ms Snape please keep her beady little eyes to herself and out of other people’s business._  
_Mr. Padfoot agrees, and hopes Ms Snape will use her time in a productive manner, such as washing her hair, or jumping off the astronomy tower._  
_Mr. Prongs is in agreement, and adds that Scervix is an ugly bint._  
_Mr. Wormtail would like to give his regards to Ms Snape, and hopes that she will kindly piss off.”_

“It works!” James exclaimed. Vera scowled at him, ready to strike. He recoiled.

“Sorry, we placed a repelling charm on it against you. I’m afraid it’s permanent. But let me show you how it works.” He tapped the parchment and said, “I solemnly swear I am up to no good.”

Instantly, ink sprung forth onto the parchment, creating a detailed map of the castle and the grounds, labelled with names of different individuals inside.

“Incredible,” Vera whispered.

James smiled. “It is, isn’t it? We’ll need it as a template for our surveillance plans, but it will still be useful if we keep visiting the school so often.”

“What plans?” Vera asked.

James said he would explain when they returned home.

————————

“So you’re going to create a map that monitors the movements of all the Death Eaters?” Vera asked angrily once James explained his plan.

“I thought you’d be happy about it. Think how many lives we could save with this information.” James insisted.

“It’s a violation of privacy, you’re exposing their identities. And who are you giving the map to, the Ministry?” Vera asked.

“The Order. It could be helpful in warning them ahead of time.”

“And what about me? Are you willing to put my life at risk?” Vera asked.

“I won’t put you in. You’re safe,” James reassured her.

“What about the spies, or the ones we don’t know?” Vera asked.

“Currently, it automatically adds anyone who receives the Mark, limited in scope, I know, but you know the roster for most of the members. I’ll add them in based on their magical signature. Then we’ll add in the beings, like the giants, the werewolves, etc. As for the spies, we’ll add them if we find out their identities.” James explained.

Vera sighed. “I think this is much too risky for the average Order member to see.”

“We’ll keep the master copy, and I’ll give one to Moody to do what he sees fit. Though I think the best way to tackle an army that shrouds itself in secrecy is to force them out into the open.”

—————————-

James and Vera arrived at the Prewett house on the morning of the ceremony. It was a beautiful snowy December; the wedding was to take place indoors, in the ballroom. 

The Prewett house was modest, but elegant. It was a Georgian style home with three stories and a yellow exterior with slightly peeling green shutters.

Once they entered the foyer, they were greeted by Lily with a hug for each and a firm handshake from a stern looking Gideon. Lily looked beautiful in a beautifully tailored set of emerald green robes which matched her eyes, and her hair plaited. Gideon looked dashing in a set of deep maroon dress robes.

“Oh, I’m so glad you two could make it. Please sit down, the ceremony will start soon,” Lily said. She squeezed Vera’s hand and asked, “I’m sorry you couldn’t be my maid of honor and stand with me, but can I convince you to join me anyway?”

“Lily, it’s your day,” Vera replied. “Plus, I’m not dressed for it.” She was wearing her one pair of dress robes, which at pale green were a different color than the blush pink bridesmaid dresses.

“Join me anyway.” Lily insisted, “it would mean the world to me to have you standing beside me.”

So Vera stood awkwardly with Lily’s bridesmaids: Marlene, Mary, and a heavily pregnant woman crying throughout the whole ceremony, Lily’s new sister-in-law confessed to Vera her love of weddings. Vera listened silently.

Gideon’s groomsmen consisted of his brother, Fabian, his brother-in-law, and a few Order Members such as Benjy Fenwick and Sirius, who stared daggers at her and James.

After the ceremony, (no room for objections in a Wizarding wedding, though Vera probably would not vocally object anyway) they were ushered into the dining room. It was fairly large, with a single long wooden table for the guests decorated with ivy, holly and pine leaves. Pomegranates and chestnuts were scattered about on a large red chenille runner and each placement was adorned with a simple plate and goblet.

Dinner was simple: roast turkey, Brussels sprouts, carrots, and mashed potatoes all cooked by Molly. Wine was passed around and each goblet was filled to the brim. The children ran around the table, leaving their seats and moving up and down the chairs.

Vera and James were sat next to Sirius and Fenwick, a few spaces away from Lily. The seats next to the bride and groom were for family. Fabian and Molly sat next to Gideon, and Mr. and Mrs. Evans sat next to Lily. It seemed Petunia was unable to make it, and her parents looked uneasy as they made small talk with Arthur, who asked them incessant questions about Muggle minutiae. Marlene was flirting with Fabian, and Mary and Molly were trading recipes.

James and Fenwick made small talk about Quidditch, while Sirius sat silently and picked at his food. Vera ate a little, but mostly felt a horrible headache.

“Why are you two here? I didn’t think you’d want to be associated with this sort of crowd.” Sirius asked.

“For your information, Sirius, we were invited.” Vera replied sourly.

“Well you didn’t have to come. I don’t think it’s very auspicious having a Death Eater at a wedding,” Sirius hissed.

There was a sudden hush about the table as the guests stopped to listen in.

“That is a baseless accusation to throw around, Sirius,” James replied harshly.

Sirius looked him directly in the eye. “It is not baseless. And I’m not going to ignore it just to be polite. You both have too much blood on your hands.” He stood up, wand in hand. “However, I would be willing to discuss this with you outside.”

Gideon stood up, “I think we should move onto the toasts. Sirius, could I have a word with you?”

“It’s late, we were planning on leaving soon anyway,” Vera replied standing up. 

James stood up, “I’ll get our cloaks.”

“Wait,” Lily protested, following them to the foyer.

“There’s no need to ask us to stay, we’re just going to spoil your evening,” Vera stated, taking her cloak from the closet.

“And we had a lovely time, Lily. We wish you and Gideon all the best,” James added, giving her a hug. Lily let out a sob and hugged him back.

“I wished you both could be happy, I’m sorry it went so wrong.”

“We’re sorry for ruining your wedding,” Vera replied. Lily hugged her, she stiffened. 

“No, without you both, it would have been awful. Thank you,” she sniffed, wiping her eyes.

“Darling, we’re ready for the first dance,” Gideon called. He walked over to the foyer and nodded at James and Vera, taking Lily by the hand and twirling her around into his arms. She couldn’t help but give a smile.

He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her. He addressed them,“Thank you for joining us, I’m sorry about the commotion earlier.”

“No, that’s on us,” James replied. He reached out his hand to shake Gideon’s. He did not take it, but politely wished them goodbye and walked them to the door.

Once they apparated back, they collapsed onto their couch.

“Ugh, what a mess.” James moaned.

Vera leaned into him, resting on his chest. She could feel his breath rise and fall. “How long has Sirius known?”

“I don’t think he does, but he’s suspected since your induction.” James answered. “I don’t blame him for acting this way, but it still hurts.” He wrapped his arms around Vera and kissed her forehead. She leaned in and kissed him, stroking his face, her lips nibbling his.

“I know you had to give up so much to join me. Was it worth it?” Vera asked.

“In some ways, yes. In others, no. I wish I could have fought with my friends, that they still trusted me and I didn’t have to lie to them. But in other ways it’s worth it.”

Vera raised an eyebrow. “I sincerely doubt that.”

“I have you. I wouldn’t have that if I’d abandoned you.” James replied.

“But you didn’t have to feel obligated. Marrying me shouldn’t have been your burden.” Vera said.

“It’s not. I chose this because I love you.”

Vera frowned. “Why?”

James laughed. “Are you asking why someone would love you?”

“Maybe. Why me? Why not Lily? You did have the chance at some point.”

“I might have had the chance of asking her in Seventh year, but I didn’t. And it wasn’t just because we were engaged. Vera, I fell in love with you in fifth year, and I was in denial for a very long time. If I had to do it over again. I might have told you sooner, but that’s it.”

Vera was overwhelmed, she shook her head. “That’s not true, you had to say this for your own sake. You settled for me.”

“I never settled. I love you, and I hope you’ll love me back.” James replied, his eyes earnest his voice passionate. “What about you? Are you still in love with Lily.”

Vera thought about it, and yes she was. She still felt pain and sorrow thinking about her. It physically hurt seeing her look so happy with Gideon. But, the pain was less than it was even compared to last year, and she found herself thinking of her less each day, and more about James. She felt a twinge of sorrow mixed with happiness, and confusion. Did he really mean it? Or would he hurt her? She wanted to believe him.

Vera felt tears running down her face as she leaned forward and kissed him passionately.

“Tell me again that you love me.”

“I love you,” James replied earnestly. He meant it.

Vera cried. James wrapped his arms around her and comforted her.

“It’s alright, you don’t need to say anything,” he soothed.

“Good,” she sniffled. “I think it would kill me if I had to say it out loud.”

“Say what?” James asked.

“You know what I mean.” Vera replied irritably.

James grinned. “No, I don’t, tell me.”

Vera glared at him. “You can’t be that dense.”

“I am, what are you trying to say?”

“I love you, you duffer. Though now I’m doubting my judgement.” Vera mumbled.

James laughed, and kissed her passionately. He picked her up and carried her to the bedroom, where they made love. He let Vera take control, riding on top of him, and it was one of the first times they climaxed together.

As they were about to drift off to sleep in each other’s arms, Vera felt the searing pain of the Mark scorch her arms. There was to be no rest.


	31. Chapter 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wartime Interlude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: this chapter contains scenes of graphic violence, torture, and sexual assault. Basic Bellatrix stuff really

Two months later

Vera apparated to the designated location - a safe house in Dagenham that was held in a shell corporation for one of Lucius’s ventures. Some sort of broom manufacturing business or the other.

She lifted her wand to the door, which read her magical signature and opened, allowing her to pass through. As the climbed the stairs of the split entrance, she was stopped by a large burly man.

“What is the purpose of your visit?” He asked mockingly.

“No need for the pleasantries, Walden. I’m here for the meeting like everyone else.” Vera grumbled.

“Just doing my job, Mrs. Potter.” Macnair sneered. “What was the last thing Auror Humphries said before we did him in?”

“Is this necessary?” Vera asked, lifting her arm to reveal her Mark, which had been burning up for the past hour, the skull looking black and unruly.

“If we’re using Polyjuice to do in our foes, the same tricks could be used on us, Mrs. Potter.”

“And who made the Polyjuice? Who extracted Mrs. Humphries and impersonated her until we got close enough to dispatch him?” Vera asked rhetorically.

“Well, I took out the bint, but that doesn’t answer my question.” Macnair replied.

Vera sighed. “He asked told me, in his words, ‘Please, don’t hurt Margaret, kill me instead,’” Vera replied in a bored monotone.

“Which we did,” Macnair laughed. “Then you killed the bitch for good measure.” He grinned. “I was just messing with you Severa, come on in. You’re on time, for once.”

“The Dark Lord is quite insistent on punctuality,” Vera muttered, turning her face into a stony mask as she stepped through the door.

The others were mostly present. Karakoff and Dolohov sat on the left corner of the table, gloomily chatting in Russian. Nott, Rookwood, and Avery were in their own section, the Oldies as they were dubbed by some of the newer members. Crabbe, Goyle, and Yaxley were chuckling about something- probably a dirty joke knowing them. They left a seat by Yaxley for Macnair. Rosier seemed to be interrogating the newest member, Jugson. Vera noticed he was sitting a bit too close, his hand resting on the man’s knee. Mulciber and Travers were on the right side of the table. Since Lucius planned the meeting this time, he sat in the center right, while Rodolphus Lestrange and his wife sat on the left side of the center, his brother next to him while his wife sat next to the empty chair. Vera and Bellatrix locked eyes, and she glared at Vera, which for some reason made her feel hot and flustered. Vera looked away. Regulus through some miracle and a few force fed Pepperup potions was sitting on Lucius’s right, pale and barely able to keep his head up, but present.

Vera noticed there weren’t any available chairs other than the empty one at the center. Knowing better, she conjured one and sat at the right corner next to Travers, who gave her a nod.

They sat, and waited.

With a burst of the door, Voldemort strode into the room, his dark robes flowing beneath him like a cloud of smoke, his hair tousled and shining, his skin still waxy and flat, his eyes a deep shade of crimson. Not the cornea, the irises. Vera was still unnerved by how horribly he pretended to have the facade of looking human, and how little he cared.

The Death Eaters rose from their seats as Voldemort approached. “Welcome, my friends,” he greeted amiably, with a hint of menace. Each member bowed their head in fear, and some in awe of the power emanating from him. His magic was almost palpable. They mumbled their greetings, not making eye contact. Macnair locked the door and joined them, standing next to Vera. She could feel his breath on her neck.

“Greetings, my Lord,” Lucius responded, bowing and offering the Dark Lord the empty chair, which he accepted.

“Thank you, Lucius. I’m touched by your initiative to organize this meeting.” Voldemort added, sitting down.

“Of course, my Lord. The pleasure is mine.” Lucius replied eagerly, his need to gain their Lord’s favour as a possible second obvious to all.

“Rodolphus and I will be willing to host next week’s meeting, I’m sure Lucius could use a break,” Bellatrix interjected, causing the blond man to turn and scowl at her, before returning to his normal, affable demeanor. 

“Yes, well I’m sure you could host these meetings at Lestrange Hall, but that might give the aurors some probable cause,” Lucius replied casually.

“Let the Aurors try to stop us,” Bellatrix declared passionately. “They fear us. They are the ones who would be slaughtered.” She laughed.

The Dark Lord gave her an indulgent smile. “Then it’s settled, we will hold all future meetings at Lestrange Hall until further notice. I find all this subterfuge in warehouses to be a bit distasteful.”

Lucius frowned.

The Dark Lord ignored him. “Onto business. Overall, our plans are on schedule. However, while our efforts to quell Auror interference have been successful and DMLE has backed down, thank you Avery,” he acknowledged, and the other man nodded in appreciation, “There seems to be an unaccounted factor undermining our efforts.”

“Dumbledore’s army of Mudbloods and blood-traitors!” Goyle yelled. The others at the table joined in, yelling in indignation. Vera noticed Regulus’s face pale. She hoped he could keep it together.

Voldemort nodded. “Yes, Goyle, very good. It seems that while we have the advantage on this so-called Order of the Phoenix, they seem to have an idea of what they’re doing. I’ve had three attacks thwarted because of these fools, and I will not have another.” Voldemort’s voice was sharp as he scanned the room, his nostrils flared. “Have I made myself clear?”

Silence.

“Does anyone have any suggestions as to how we can stamp out these traitors?” Voldemort asked, almost purring.

“We kill them,” Macnair answered. “Kill the lot and move on.”

“It can’t be that easy,” Nott interrupted. “Do we know their identities? Names?”

“They’ve been showing up to skirmish without concealing themselves. So yes, we do know their identities,” Yaxley added. “It just takes cross referencing their faces with Ministry records, which Rosier has so kindly done for us.”

“But it’s not everyone,” Rosier replied. “They only bring three at most in each group and they alternate frequently. We’ve identified nine or so, there must be more.”

“Luckily, it seems we have some inside information,” Rodolphus added.

“Yes,” Voldemort replied. “Rodolphus has been able to develop contact inside the Order, which we’ve been able to relay information from for a few months.”

“And this one hasn’t died yet. They’ve been most helpful in providing a roster and home addresses.” Rodolphus preened. Bellatrix looked angry, poised to attack. 

“So what are we waiting for?” Bellatrix asked, standing up. “Let’s crush these filthy blood traitors and the Mudbloods.”

“Now Bella, we have to go about this carefully,” Voldemort answered calmly. Bellatrix nodded and sat down, but she did not seem convinced.

“To strike the Order, we will need to strike at three points: the coin, the strategist, and the general himself. As Chief Warlock, Dumbledore wields an unusually high amount of power in wartime, and he’s exploited it well by undermining our legislation and convincing that idiot Bagnold to declare martial law, but short of killing him, nothing will remove him from that position. He’s too popular to the general public.” Vera could see the fury boiling underneath the Dark Lord’s surface. 

“So, our other options are targeting the head of the Aurors, Alastor Moody, which has proven to be...difficult.”

“The blighter’s too bloody prepared.” Yaxley complained. “He sees us coming before we can get to him.”

“I will not listen to excuses,” Voldemort hissed. He took a deep breath and resumed. “So, that leaves us with the Order’s purse, the Bones family. While Hector and Proserpina Bones have retired from public life, their sons Edgar and Edmund are prominent in their opposition. You might remember that Edgar is a renowned champion duelist, and Edmund a healer at St. Mungos working on reducing the long term effects on the Cruciatus.”

This elicited some chuckles from the group.

“Our first target will be Edmund and his family. He has a wife and two children. Make sure there are no survivors. When we are finished with him, we will target Edgar. First his family, then leave him for last.” Voldemort ordered.

“I think there’s one more member of the Bones family, my Lord. A sister, named Amelia.” Mulciber added.

Vera remembered Amelia briefly from school. She was a few years ahead of her year. Mulciber used to say she had the best pair of tits, for a Hufflepuff. Vera wasn’t really sure what that meant, but at the time she just nodded and agreed with him.

“She’s of no importance,” Voldemort dismissed. “We are only after the brothers.”

They laid out a plan of attack, two pronged to target both families on one night and completely devastate morale. They divided tasks, Bellatrix taking pleasure in her idea of torturing the Cruciatus healer, with her husband and both brother-in-laws joining her along with Jugson for an introductory raid. Macnair, Yaxley, Dolohov, Rookwood and Vera would take on Edgar, the more credible threat.

When the meeting adjourned, Vera stopped by to check on Regulus, who looked like he was about to collapse. Luckily, Lucius was too upset from his failed power play to notice, so Vera was able to escort him out of the building and take him home. Despite everything, he still continued to live at Grimmauld Place.

Regulus groaned. “I think I’m getting worse.”

“Do you think the Dark Lord suspects?” Vera asked

“If he has, it’s not my doing. I’ve used all my energy on my Legimency shields,” he responded, crashing onto one of the stuffed velvet couches. He winced, and clutched his side. Vera doled out a pain potion hidden in her robes as he adjusted his position to get comfortable.

“Any ideas on who the leak could be, in the Order?” Vera asked.

Regulus laughed. “If you of all people don’t know, then we’re in trouble. Doesn’t the old codger trust you enough to tell you?”

“That’s classified.” Vera replied bitterly.

“So, that’s a no then.” Regulus coughed, but sighed once the pain potion kicked in. “Ah, that’s good. Could you leave a few vials with me?”

“And turn you into an addict?” Vera replied. “Just sleep in off.”

“How about a vial for some information? While they aren’t telling me specifics, I know they had an old spy, but they died. So they have a new one. One of the young ones.” Regulus added.

Vera frowned. “Any names?” She took out a vial and hovered it over his face.

“That’s all I got. I heard Travers is taking care of that and it’s need to know. I’m just lucky I overheard. Now give me the vial.”

Vera placed the vial in his hands. “Only one more.”

“That was worth two at least,” Regulus replied petulantly.

“Just try to get some rest. Any luck with the Founder’s artifacts?”

“Well, I found the existence of Hufflepuff’s Cup in the Borgin and Burke’s ledgers, but the records vanish after 1952.”

“That’s disconcerting.” Vera noted. “What about Basilisk venom?”

“Futile. Does your husband have any contacts in the potions world that could help?”

“There might be. We have a meeting scheduled in Knockturn next week.” Vera admitted.

“I’ll go with him. Don’t want Potter getting duped by some smuggler,” Regulus declared.

Vera was about to protest, but decided it wasn’t worth the effort of letting a man in pain argue. She waved her wand and lifted a shawl on the sofa over his body as he began to doze off.

—————————————————————

Vera apparated to the Bones estate in full robes, mask on.

The others were at the rendezvous point. They stood in a circle, awaiting instructions.

When Macnair gave the signal by casting the Mark, Dolohov and Yaxley would charge from the front, Rookwood from the back, and Vera would take to the roof in case they tried to flee by broom. Not the most exciting placement but strategic. She wasn’t fond of flying, and they knew that. 

She took up to the sky, the wind in her face, and landed on the stone tiles. She shrank her broom and waited, the tension killing her.

There Vera stood, waiting under a starry sky. By now they must have broken in, crept into the main foyer and up the stairs to the bedrooms, ready to strike the family in their sleep.

There was a shout, and she saw flashes of colored light. Vera opened one of the nearest windows and climbed in running out of the attic to find a full on skirmish between the Death Eaters and the Order. It worked.

As spells flew, Vera asked what happened.

“We’ve been bloody found, that’s what,” yelled Yaxley, casting the Killing Curse. It missed.

Vera cast a few spells to block the barrage of curses, and a few that could maim if she was aiming properly. 

It was a small group of them, Fabian Prewett, Sirius Black, and a tall, broad-shouldered man Vera didn’t recognize. They were able to hold them off, and she knew her colleagues would not fight to the death. They just had to get out of there.

She cast a Diffendo in a general direction, and a Protego. 

She was going to have to tread water, so to speak, pretending to fight and block until Rookwood called to retreat. Seeing him gleefully send curse after curse at Edgar, (he should have left with his family, why was he still here) it didn’t seem like he wanted to leave. Edgar to his credit looked like he was enjoying himself in the heat of battle.

“I know you’re holding back, Scervix!” Sirius taunted, sending a Bludgeoning Hex Her way. She ducked and rolled out of the way, sending the Burn Hex towards him. He blocked it, and laughed.

“C’mon Scervix. Let’s cut the pretense,” Sirius continued. “I know it’s you under that big scary mask, ooh I’m so terrified.” He theatrically shuddered. Dolohov sent a curse his way, and he dodge. The sofa next to him exploded and withered to ash. 

Vera turned to face him, and lifted her wand to her face lightly bowing her head.

Sirius gave a bitter smirk. “May I have this dance, Severa?”

She sent a Bombarda his way, which he narrowly avoided with a well timed somersault - shoving Fabian out of the way. The spell hit the load bearing wall and the plaster started to fall on Dolohov, who used a Shield Charm to protect himself. He threw the rocks at their direction, one of them hitting the broad-shouldered man in the back as he was fighting Yaxley. He crumpled to the ground, screaming. 

“Stupid girl!” Dolohov shouted.

“That’s something we both agree on!” Sirius shouted back loudly. “Judging from you voice, you sound like Tony Dolohov!”

“Don’t you get fresh with me, boy! Crucio!” Dolohov shouted. Vera took some pleasure in seeing Sirius writhe in pain, even though it was short-lived as Fabian cast Expeliarmus on Dolohov’s wand. He jumped up and caught the wand midair, the curse landing on its caster. Dolohov screamed, but Fabian stood there idly, watching him as Sirius had curled into a ball, reeling from the pain. 

Vera couldn’t stand by and watch, there were eyes on her. Specifically, Rookwood and Macnair, who in a double effort were wearing down Edgar, but had yet to kill him. She cast Sectumsempra - pointing it directly at Fabian’s hand. She heard a roar of pain as he fell to the ground, and heard the thud of three fingers rolling on the floor along with the wooden shards of a blasted wand. He clutched his hand and wailed. Vera ran over to tend Dolohov. Nothing broken, just the normal physical stress of the curse. She pulled out a Calming Draught from her robe and lifted his mask slightly, pouring the potion in his mouth. He coughed, and she helped him up. She dropped two unopened vials onto the carpet. It’s not like they’ll notice, or use them, perhaps she was getting careless. 

As she felt the weight of the taller, heavier man bearing down on her, she dragged him out of the house. Protocol be damned, she was going to make a retreat even if Rookwood decided he wanted to die there.

Macnair followed her out. He was limping, holding his side in pain.

“If you’re going, I’m going too.” He coughed. “Reckon I’ve smashed me ribs.”

“Looks like you’ve got a compound fracture on your leg,” Vera added.

Vera cast Episkey where she could and handed a pain potion, resigned to the fact she might have to Side-Along two injured men.

Vera saw a burst of green light flashing from the windows. She stood, and waited for a second, or third. Instead, Rookwood bounded out of the house, covering his eyes and wincing from a nasty gash on his shoulder. There were maggots crawling around it, probably conjured by Edgar. When Rookwood removes his arm, she noticed there were holes in his eye sockets and blood running down his face.

“Cowards, the lot of you.” Rookwood grumbled.

“Is he dead?” Vera asked.

“Yes, no thanks to you. The two boys fobbed off. Black apparated away with the Prewett boy before I could have my fun. But I did get to keep a finger.” Rookwood added with a slimy chuckle.

“You’re welcome,” Vera replied.

“Doesn’t excuse your poor performance today, Potter. You got Dolohov into this mess. The Dark Lord won’t be pleased.”

“Where’s Yaxley?” Vera asked.

“Longbottom got him. I left him, too much of a risk to see if he’s alive.”

Vera nodded. She and Rookwood grabbed the two injured and Side-Alonged to Lestrange Hall. Once they arrived at the parlor, the in-residence Healer, a witch named Smythe, tended to their wounds. After a debriefing from a peeved Dark Lord, Vera was sent to the ballroom to be tortured by Bellatrix until she saw fit to let her go.

The pain was intense, overwhelming. There was nothing but pain, blinding white pain as she screamed herself hoarse, her body flailing, tears hot down her face. Bellatrix laughed.

“Ickle little Severa made a boo boo,” Bellatrix jeered. “I knew the Dark Lord would see through you. Obviously, he can tell who is the superior witch.

Vera didn’t even care about the power plays and politics, she just wanted the pain to stop. “Yes, Bellatrix, you are the most powerful witch there is! Oh, please stop. The most powerful...ah.”

Bellatrix stopped the curse. “What else am I?” She seemed amused, smiling gleefully.

Vera whimpered, the pain was unbearable. “The most feared, the most intelligent, the most beautiful- you are a true force to be reckoned with.”

“Beautiful, you say?” Bellatrix’s eyebrow quirked. She grinned and knelt beside Vera, stroking her face. The sensation of touch was too sensitive on Vera’s skin after being subjected to the nerve stimulation of Crucio, and she cried in pain, shivering. Bellatrix ran her hand down Vera’s neck, gripping it tightly as she choked her. She leaned over to whisper in Vera’s ear.

“Listen carefully, Half-Blood. I’ve heard from Evan Rosier that you’re a dyke, and I know when someone has their eye on me, I’ve been used to it my whole life.” Her hand filled Vera’s neck tighter as she struggled to breathe, Vera fidgeted, trying in her weak state to push her off. Instead, Bellatrix grabbed her torso with her other arm, pulling her tighter. Without warning, Bellatrix pulled her hair, pulling her head towards her and kissed her aggressively, her tongue forcefully entering her mouth. Vera gasped as Bellatrix continued, untying her Death Eater robes and ripping open her slip, exposing her. She felt the cold air on her chest, and Bellatrix roughly grabbed her breasts, biting them. She took out a small knife from her robes, it glinted menacingly.

“I can’t stand for that sort of insult, not from someone like you. Especially some upstart who tries to win the Dark Lord’s favour. I’m his favourite, not you! He has shown me his favour in ways you could never imagine, trusted me with his most prized of treasures. Perhaps I should teach you a lesson, maybe you need to be spayed to get rid of these filthy thoughts.” Bellatrix purred, eager to change tactics.

She pushed the knife against Vera’s chest, and she felt the sharp edge pinch against her skin.

“That’s enough, Bella.” 

They turned to see the Dark Lord standing in the doorway.

Bellatrix stood up. “My Lord, I was just about to begin torturing Severa for the disgraceful behavior. Surely you see now that she was not qualified for the position you’ve bestowed upon her.”

“I’m aware of that. But your behavior is not above reproach either. We do not, under any circumstances act in the manner you just did to our fellow soldiers.”

“This Half-Blood has been harboring unnatural feelings for me,” Bellatrix hissed. “I thought I would remind her to remember her place.”

Bellatrix smirked. “Very well, My Lord, but I’m sure she was enjoying herself before you interrupted.”

Voldemort lifted his wand, and cast the Cruciatus on Bellatrix. She fell to the floor writhing, but cackled in delight. He undid the curse after almost a minute, letting her lie on the floor, still giggling.

He walked over to Vera, and grabbed her robes, wrapping them around her. “Cover yourself, Severa.”

Realizing she was still exposed in front of the Dark Lord, Vera hastily wrapped her robes around her. Voldemort stared at her curiously.

Vera cast her eyes downward. “Forgive me, My Lord.”

“While your mistake injured Dolohov, you made up for it by maiming the Prewett boy and healing those in your team that needed it. While we might have had some setbacks, we still achieved our goal at dispatching Edgar and Edmund Bones. The worrying part about it was that their families were nowhere to be found, and are still unaccounted for. It seems that by the presence of Order members at both locations, someone revealed our plans.” Voldemort said carefully.

“That is impossible,” Vera replied. “The only people who could have known about the plot were Inner Circle Members.”

“Such as yourself?” Voldemort asked.

Vera remained impassive as the Dark Lord cast Legimens, bombarding her mind in her weakened state. She shrieked, gripping her head as she barely held him off.

“Is your husband a spy for the Order?” Voldemort demanded.

“What? No, My Lord, he isn’t! He disavowed his classmates after we married. We don’t associate with those Blood traitors.” Vera replied tensely.

“Then why were you at the Prewett wedding?” Voldemort asked harshly.

“None of James’s friends know he’s joined our side, we had to go. It would be too obvious if we didn’t. They’d have him arrested and we’d be discovered!” Vera replied.

“Lies! Severa, you’re young, and foolish, blinded by love. Potter’s using you to give information to the Order. Why else would he marry you?” Voldemort said. 

Bellatrix cackled on the floor. “It obviously wasn’t for her looks. Perhaps she’s a good shag?”

“Bella!” Voldemort rebuked. She continued to cackle. Voldemort lifted his wand and lifted her body out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

Vera pursed her lips. She was going to have to play this carefully. 

“I don’t know what to say, My Lord. I trusted my husband implicitly and loved him as a good wife should. I’m...shocked beyond words that he could possibly betray me.”

“Love has the ability to poison our minds, to trick us of our reason.” Voldemort responded. He placed his hand on Vera’s shoulder, and she tried not to flinch.

“What must I do, My Lord? To redeem myself?” Vera asked intently. “Should I kill him?”

Voldemort gave a cruel grin. “I appreciate the enthusiasm, Severa, but that is not necessary. I need you to report on how he sends his intelligence and you and your husband will meet me on a personal basis to discuss strategy, perhaps over dinner. He will feed false information, and we will crush them from the inside.”

Vera paused. “That’s brilliant, My Lord.”

Voldemort preened. “Yes, it is, isn’t it? But I’m going to need you to perform an Unbreakable Vow. You will not under any means, whether through speech, writing, or memory, reveal that I am aware of this spying. Can you agree to that?”

It’s not like she had much of a choice.

Once they had finished the Vow, Voldemort ran his fingers over the growing scar on her arm from the Vow’s after effects. “That scar is proof that you are mine alone.”

“Yes, My Lord,” Vera answered, kneeling down.

Voldemort lifted Vera’s face up by her chin. “Rise.”

As she stood, he stared at her again. “What are your thoughts about me?”

“I think the world of you, My Lord,” Vera replied hoarsely. Everything hurt.

“Would you consider becoming my lover?”

Vera choked in horror but tried to control herself. “That is, very inappropriate, My Lord.”

“I’m not asking about the propriety of this decision, I’m asking about intent.”

“Why do you ask? Have I given you reason to suspect that I have such feelings?” Vera asked.

“I’ve found that most women feel that way about me, inexplicably. Personally, I don’t see the point in it all, but it makes a valuable incentive. And it can be enjoyable, if you are interested.”

“I’m sorry, My Lord, but no. I would have to refuse your offer.” Very replied, straining not to say something rude.

“Ah, Yes. Bella noted your proclivity towards the female form. I can arrange for her to meet you instead, if you’d prefer. I can’t promise that there won’t be torture involved.”

Vera did not know what to say to that.

“I will speak to Bella. She is quite agreeable, once you get to know her. And I’m sure you and I will be on much better terms in the future, Severa.”

Vera nodded, then watched as Voldemort left the room. She quickly dressed herself, and apparated home.

When she returned, James rushed to her side. He lifted her up and carried her to the bed and gave her some healing potions as he tended to her wounds.

“The Bones are safe, for now. They’ve been escorted to France, where they’ll stay in hiding for the time being. Judging from your appearance, you gave a good fight.”

“I had a run-in with Sirius,” Vera commented.

“I heard. He’s fine, for the most part. You tore half of Fabian’s wand hand though. And Frank’s spine is injured, though it will be a while before he can walk again.”

“We has it just as bad on our side. Yaxley’s possibly dead, Macnair broke his ribs, Dolohov underwent the Cruciatus for two minutes, and Rookwood has been blinded.”

“Not too shabby,” James remarked. “Almost makes me wish I was out there.”

“Trust me, you don’t,” Vera replied bitterly.

“You look like hell. If Dolohov went under for two minutes, you must have been under the Cruciatus much longer, you fingers are twitching.”

“I don’t know how long it was,” Vera mumbled. 

“Who cast it?” James asked gently. “I noticed someone ripped your slip. Did something happen?”

“Bellatrix happened.” Vera muttered. “She tried to assault me, but the Dark Lord stopped her.”

“Why?” James asked in confusion.

“He offered his services as my lover.” 

James laughed before looking at her face and realizing this was not a joke.

“Why? Does the sod actually fancy you?” James asked angrily. 

“He said it would be a convincing incentive.”

“An incentive for what?”

“Loyalty.” She lifted her arm to reveal the scar from her Unbreakable Vow, which covered the scar from her trip to the cave.

“Why would he need to incentivize your loyalty? He trusts you, doesn’t he?” James asked nervously.

“I can’t tell you.”

“So he doesn’t. Shit.” He looked at her scar. “And now you can’t tell me what he does know about us.”

“Precisely. Though I should also warn you that he now wants to see us one on one for dinner for the foreseeable future.”

James groaned. “Were we that obvious?”

“In hindsight, yes.”

“He’ll probably try to find out what we know about the Order, which is nothing, and try to feed some bollocks that we’ll have to pretend is true, or else we’ll be had.”

“How’s your cooking?” Vera asked.

“Better,” James replied. “I have been meaning to try this recipe for duck confit. But, I’m going to have to tell Dumbledore.”

“I will have to tell the Dark Lord about your methods of communication. So expect to find your journals unusable soon.” Vera admitted. 

“And the map?” James asked.

“Add me into it if you haven’t by now. It will look too suspicious if I’m the only Death Eater not on it.” Vera replied.  
————————————————————————  
The map had worked wonders in catching Death Eaters. Now that it was live, Order members could track down Death Eaters and ambush them before attacks occurred. 

Aurors arrested suspected Death Eaters in their homes on probable cause, and while some were charged for possession of Dark Artefacts, there was very little that counted by way of proof if the witches and wizards in question weren’t at the scene of the crime, actively committing said crimes. Until the map made it possible. 

Each arrested suspect had their face plastered on the front page of the Prophet, Wild and angry, protesting their innocence. Without trials during martial law, no one could be sure- and it was sowing seeds of doubt in the public, especially since no one knew where the information was coming from. Low level Death Eaters who couldn’t afford bail were eventually sent to Azkaban and forgotten. They were spell fodder, replaceable. 

Vera remembered the first time. They were on a raid to attack a Carodoc Dearborn. As they charged into his flat in the middle of the night, six Aurors descended upon them. They had placed Anti-Appartition wards, and they were trapped, the Aurors circling in, casting Body Binds, Stunners, and anything to subdue the unprepared Death Eaters. In that instant, two were down, and the remaining four were fighting. They ran out the flat, the firefight continuing on the stairwell as terrified tenants hid, blasts destroying the bannisters and ceilings. They ran out of the building, only to find more Aurors at the door ready to strike, taking down Crabbe and Goyle. Before Vera and her partner could be caught, she grabbed his hand, running in the other direction, blasting the Aurors with a cloud of toxic fumes she conjured from her wand. She was familiar with the area on the Muggle side of the city, and they ducked behind alleyways and climbed chain link fences. They ran until they reached the river, and figured they lost them. 

“That was close,” Vera commented.

“Too close,” agreed Lucius. “They’re likely to monitor wand activity for a day or two. We’ll have to floo home.”

“You can use ours. My flat is two stops away,” Vera replied.

“Stops?”

“Bus stops.”

Lucius gave her a look of disgust. “You don’t mean to say we’ll be taking the Knight Bus?”

“I was thinking we’d take the tube. Less conspicuous.”

Lucius stared at her in horror. 

Vera had a change of Muggle clothes underneath her Death Eater robes, no slips anymore for her, and found a man on the street willing to trade his coat in exchange for three of Lucius’s galleons. Lucius hated every second as the descended into the depths of Muggle hell, with its grimy seats and dim sodium lights and smoke. It was everything he hated about Muggles in one experience 

Eventually, they reached Vera’s apartment without using magic and triggering the Aurors. Despite suffering through James’s gleeful mockery, Lucius thanked Vera for her help and for getting his face out the the next morning’s Prophet.

“I won’t forget this, Severa.” Lucius said as he stepped into the fireplace. “I’ll return the favour in kind.”

Vera was certain he would not, but having Malfoy as an ally could prove useful.

Soon, the Death Eaters became aware there was some form of surveillance, but were unaware as to how to avoid it. There were whispers, it was an invasion of privacy, a violation of wizard etiquette- no one but one’s own mother should be allowed to track them. Never mind they were killing people, but it was a matter of principle and the Blood traitors were beginning to fight dirty for once.

When Voldemort would come over for dinner, he would bring a bottle of wine and they would chat. The Dark Lord was charming when he wanted to be, plying them with wine and lies about future attack strategies. Vera and James would nod and listen intently, and ask questions to get the Dark Lord to brag about his cleverness. James would listen intently, and Voldemort complimented his cooking. James notified Dumbledore, and they sent an Order member on the decoy mission while checking the map for the real attacks.

In order to keep their cover, they had to let a few raids happen unannounced without an Order ambush. Those were the hardest. They’d flip a sickle to see who was spared, who wasn’t.

“We have two choices, the McKinnons or the Fenwicks.” Vera remarked as she came back from a meeting.

“So now they’re focusing primarily on Order members, not just Aurors?” James noted.

“They’ve been more efficient than the Dark Lord expected. He wants to raze their houses to the ground, with them in it.”

James sighed. “I hate this.” He reaches out and pulled a sickle. “Heads for the McKinnons. Please pull through, Marley”

It landed tails. 

“I’ll tell them to keep an eye out for the Fenwicks.” James answered, tears in his eyes. When he was finished, he went to the bedroom and cried for his friend and Quidditch teammate, the second he’d killed so far.

The McKinnons died fighting. Marlene took down two Death Eaters herself. Vera wished she could reach out to Lily, but knew it was too dangerous

She had to brace herself. She would be returning to the werewolf commune soon.


	32. Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera learns how to cast The Patronus

Vera met with Remus to distribute the wands early in the morning. Since most of the inner circle was restructuring or healing, she could lie low for a while. Rookwood was having two magical eyes refitted, Macnair was mostly healed, though he’d be on bed rest for a while, and Dolohov pretended he was fine, nerve damage was just inevitable.

She had boxed and labeled each wand, James helping her as they packed them into a knapsack with an extension charm. She wasn’t sure if the wand wood would match the temperament of the werewolves, she hadn’t known them that well, but Remus made an educated guess.

They were waiting when she arrived, eager and giddy, even the adults looked as excited as the few children present.

Greyback even looked excited. Vera and Remus has discussed whether or not to put safeguards on his wand, and decided to add a few tunes to make his weaker. Even then, giving any sort of wand to the werewolf was a terrible idea.

Jan had already placed the whole commune in a single file line.

“This is taking all day,” grumbled Okeke.

It didn’t take as long to distribute them as Vera had expected. However, as soon as one of the teenagers received his, he pointed it on his friend, blasting him in an accidental stunner. At least they worked, for the most part.

“Any more stunts like the one I just saw, and I’m taking these back.” Vera said threateningly.

It caused a grumble amongst the crowd, but she ignored it, as well as any visible concerns of her own misgivings.

“We’ll start lessons immediately. You won’t get the full Hogwarts curriculum, but a few of the basics from Charms, Transfiguration, and Defense. Remus will be present for any follow up lessons while I’m gone.”

The first lesson was the Knockback Jinx and turning a stick into a needle. Most failed. Whether it was due to the shoddy wands, or lack of magic, Vera couldn’t tell.

“I did it!”

Vera heard a small voice from the back, a child? Were there children in the commune?

“Good job!” Remus congratulated the girl, who was probably no more than twelve. She was far too thin, and dirty. But she looked so happy grasping her needle in her hand.

Jan hugged the girl. “Oh, I knew my princess could do it, you’re so clever!”

She giggled. “Oh, Papa, of course you’d say that! Remus helped me.”

Vera peered over at the girls work. The needle was indistinguishable from a normal one.

“You did not injure yourself, which is a surprise. Your results are adequate.”

Her eyes shone despite the lack of praise.

“Ignore her, she’s always this unpleasant,” Remus replied to the girl. Vera glared at him.

The girl asked, “Do you think if I work hard, there’s a chance I could still go to Hogwarts?” 

Vera and Remus looked at each other, but couldn’t think of what to say.

Instead, Jan wrapped his arms around his daughter.

“You don’t need Hogwarts, Weronika. The wizards are weak, and they’d try to cage you, or worse, change you. You’ll be much happier here with me and Mama.”

“But, if I have a wand now, why can’t I go?” Weronika pouted.

“Because you’re still a werewolf. They wouldn’t let you anywhere near them,” replied one of the older teenagers, Stefan. “They’ll never consider you one of them, wand or not.”

“Which is why we need to double our efforts,” Greyback answered, causing others to whoop and shout. “Until every wizard is a werewolf, we will never be seen as equals.” He examined his wand. Blackthorn and his own hair as the core.

“Thank your Master for his generosity,” Greyback addressed to Vera. “We will keep it in mind in terms of our loyalty.”

“There is one condition,” Vera replied briskly. “You are not to use these wands on missions, or in public.”

The silence that followed was uncomfortable.

“Typical of you wizards,” muttered Jan.

“What was the point of giving these to us then?” Okeke demanded.

Technically, there wasn’t one. She’d made this up as an excuse to save Remus, but it was making things worse.

“To even the odds,” Vera replied. “While you are a formidable force in your transformed state, we’re going to need you to be more than that, we’ll need capable fighters all month long, or you’ll be a target for the other side to attack. In your human form, even the weakest wizard can incapacitate you.”

“We would have been fine on our own,” Greyback grumbled. “I’ve killed men with my bare hands and teeth untransformed. I could make you regret your words, girl.” He leered at her, and Vera felt the anger rise up in her face.

“Expelliarmus!” Vera shouted, as the wand leaped out of Greyback’s hand. He snarled.

He pounced, his arms reaching out to scratch her.

“Petrificus Totalus!” Vera cast, as Greyback’s form stiffened, and he fell to the ground trapped in his attack mode, arms out jaw open.

Vera sneered at the man and addressed the crowd. “I rest my case. Feel free to invite me back to teach you, or don’t.” She lifted her wand and apparated out.

Vera went into the kitchen to make herself some tea. The kettle was whistling when she heard another pop of apparition from the sitting room.

“What were you thinking?” Remus shouted. “Do you know how difficult you’ve made things for me?”

Vera poured the kettle and let the leaves brew. She quirked an eyebrow at Remus. “Tea?”

He deflated. “Yes. Why not. Have anything stronger?”

“I can splash some Calming Draught in, or whisky.”

“Whisky sounds perfect. But honestly, Vera. You had to humiliate Greyback in front of the tribe? Now they’re going to make my life hell and force me to teach them magic that they’re probably incapable of learning.”

He sat down on the kitchen table, resting his head on the wood and groaned. Vera took out a teacup and poured a third of tea, and the rest she filled with Ogden’s. No need to waste the good stuff on him.

“Should I have let you die? I’m reconsidering that decision daily.” Vera replied as she handed him a teacup. Remus looked at the tea warily, then gave her a toast and downed it in one gulp. He released a spurt of fire and coughed, smoke coming out his nostrils. 

“Thanks. I needed that. And it’s not that I’m ungrateful, but we’re in a precarious situation. While the tribe is happy to have the wands, you’ve reminded them what they can’t have and it’s making them resentful.”

“Isn’t that what we wanted? They’ll be more likely to leave the Dark Lord’s support if they see they’re being used.” She poured herself a cup and added her own splash of firewhisky.

“They already know they’re being used. They just don’t want to feel useless either. They at least felt empowered before, now you’ve reminded them how much they have to fear us. And I’ll have to start over in laying the foundation of trust.”

“Any of them we could convince to the Order?” Vera asked, taking a sip of her tea.

Remus thought carefully. “Jan is Greyback’s second-in-command. If we could convince him to turn, we could get half the tribe.”

Vera frowned. “It doesn’t seem like he’s very keen on turning anytime soon.”

“No, he’s a true believer. But if we can convince his daughter, we might have a chance.” Remus suggested.

“I doubt we can get her into Hogwarts.” Vera replied. “Dumbledore had a hard enough time keeping you.”

Remus bristled, but let it slide. “We still have to try something. I’ll keep teaching, however fruitless it might be, but drop in from time to time. Show them that there are witches and wizards out there who give a damn about them.”

Vera raised her eyebrows. “Are you honestly asking me to be a role model?”

“It’s a stretch, I know,” Remus quipped, rolling his eyes. He finished his tea and stood up. “I’ll message you when I can. It will be safer if we communicate by Patronus.”

“You can cast a corporeal Patronus?” Vera asked. Perhaps Lupin was more capable than she gave him credit for.

“You can’t?” Remus asked back. He grinned as he noticed her scowl deepen. “Well, well. It looks like there’s something Severa can’t use to best others with her magical prowess.”

“As charming as I find your antics, Lupin, I think you should be going.” Vera said, standing up. 

“I can teach you,” Remus offered. “It shouldn’t take you very long. And it would be useful.”

Vera thought it over, pursing her lips. 

“Make it quick,” she replied.

They pushed the furniture to the walls and Remus explained the process.

“Alright,” he began, clearing his throat. “So, a Patronus is a positive force, a projection of your hope, your happiness. It’s pure positivity itself.”

“Spare me the lecture, Lupin. How do I cast it?” Vera demanded impatiently.

“The Patronus isn’t like any other defensive spell, it’s about your mind space as much as anything else. You have to be able to think of your happiest memory, something that almost makes you deliriously overwhelming happy, but with no negative feelings surrounding it.”

Remus showed her the wandwork and the incantation. 

“Aright, now you try,” he declared.

Vera lifted her wand, “Expecto Patronum.” A fine silver mist filled the room.

Remus shook his head. “No, you have to mean it. Say it louder.”

“Expecto Patronum!” Vera shouted. Silver wisps emitted from her wand, then sputtered out.

“What are you using as your memory? Maybe that’s not enough.”

“That’s none of your business, Lupin.” Vera snapped. It was the first time she had met Lily and told her she was a witch. It should have worked. “It has to work, it’s not like I have that many to choose from.”

Remus frowned. “Sometimes, our memories change over time. And if there’s something unresolved, maybe it changes the memory too. Is it about Lily?”

Vera glared at him, but didn’t have the energy to fight. “Is it obvious?” 

“I know you two had a history together, and yes, I know it’s not my place to interfere, but things change. And sometimes it colours our happiness in sadness too. I don’t know if I’m explaining myself.” Remus rambled.

“I understand. But it still should have worked.” Vera replied.

“Try another. Maybe something else?” Remus offered.

Vera closed her eyes. When was the last time she had truly been happy? No war, no arguments. Probably in Cornwall. Before Sirius showed up, James had taken them to the ruins of Tintagel, and the three of them explored the wide green expanse and the rubble. The sea air stung their faces and magic permeated every stone. It crackled in the air, making them giddy and lightheaded. Lily had challenged James to a game of high stakes hide and seek, which devolved into them chasing each other. Of course, Vera was on Lily’s side, dodging his hexes and casting their own, but found herself as collateral damage when James bumped into her. They toppled to the ground, and James had just laughed. Lily asked if he admitted defeat. James had wrapped his arms around her, saying he’d already won. Vera was probably imagining things, but at the time it did feel nice, feeling wanted. Lily just shook her head and joined them, and they stayed like that until the tide set in. She could still remember the smell of the dewy grass, the clear blue sky, and the feel of her hands wrapped around Lily’s, while James wrapped his arm around her waist. They discussed the clouds floating by.

She lifted her wand and cast the charm, and a lithe and glowing silver doe galloped out of her wand. She blinked.

“Well I can’t say that it’s unexpected,” Remus remarked. “Prongs will be delighted, certainly.”

“It wasn’t for him,” Vera replied determinately. 

“I wasn’t aware there were other wizards who could turn into a stag at will,” Remus replied sarcastically.

“It was for someone else, they just happen to be in love with him.” Vera said, realizing how weak an excuse it sounded. Remus just gave her a weak smile, and taught her how to use the Patronus as a communication device. When he was finished, he made his goodbyes, urging her to commit to coming back to teach.

When Remus left, she tried casting the Patronus again. She used the memory of her confessing her love to Lily. Weak, barely corporeal. She tried the memory of her and Lily sneaking off to their spot in Gryffindor tower, silver whisps. She let out a wail of frustration, then cleared her mind.

She thought of Scotland. The chilly grey sky, the large rolling hills with grey rock towering from above and creeks rippling through the Highlands. Wildflowers, waterfalls, the small cabin with a crackling fire. Rain falling on a tin roof, and making love for the first time.

The silver doe pranced around her, and she had to admit defeat. She really had fallen for him.

“Were you going to tell me?” 

She heard James’s voice from behind her and turned to face him.

“I don’t know,” Vera replied. “I’m coming to terms with it myself.”

“For the record, mine is of you too,” James answered. “It used to be that game against Hufflepuff, you know the one where I scored twenty goals?”

“I didn’t see that one.” Vera replied, the edges of her mouth forming the ghost of a smile. 

“Of course you didn’t. But that’s not the point.” James looked at her wistfully, walking over to her. He caressed her face, moving away an errant strand of hair.

“Then what is?” Vera asked.

He didn’t answer, instead he kissed her.

He let go, and grinned. “Want to make some more memories?”

“Any luck finding the venom?” Vera asked.

James took out a vial from his robes. It was small, with clear, viscous fluid sloshing inside, closed by a dropper. “Let’s hope it works. I didn’t get a chance to test it properly.”

Vera’s eyed turned steely. “There’s one way to find out.”

She headed into the bedroom and opened the sock drawer. It was still warm. Anxiously, she picked up the locket, feeling its sleek metal and running her thumb over the intricate “S”. 

She walked back to the living room and placed it on the coffee table. James looked at her, and when she nodded, he opened the dropper and lowered it onto the horcrux.

As James was about to place the first drop, the locket shook. An apparition appeared from its seams, grimacing. It was Joey.

“Murderer!” It shouted. “Killing me once wasn’t enough was it?”

James’s hand shook, and a drop of venom fell on the table, dissolving the wood.

He closed his eyes. “You’re not real.”

The apparition cackled, it’s face slowly distorting. Much to their horror, it started forming feminine features and long curly hair. Lily.

Lily’s face sneered back at them in the apparition.

“You disgust me. You call yourself brave? What kind of man are you? You’re a fool, worthless, insignificant. Hardly worth my love or my disdain. No wonder your friends hate you. How could you have ever expected anyone to care for you, now that they know what you truly are. You coward!”

James squeezed the dropper onto the locket, and the metal began to sizzle and melt. It smelt like metal and burning flesh as smoke began to emerge.

The apparition laughed. “This is nothing, I am made of stronger stuff. But I doubt you are.” 

It turned its head towards Vera and gave a ghastly grin. “I never loved you, you know. You were never worth my time. At least now I won’t have to think about you anymore.”

Vera remained transfixed in place, wand ready as James patiently kept releasing drop after drop of venom with precision. The apparition was getting nervous. It was floundering.  
It turned its head to James. “You are pathetic. She resents you and can’t wait for you to die.”

The apparition continued to laugh maniacally. James squeezed another drop, and another, as he released the dropper’s worth of venom. It was beginning to scream as the metal melted, and it’s face was turning into a large black cloud. The smell of rotting flesh permeated the air as the miasma of Dark Magic filled the flat. With the last burst of the dropper, the apparition let out a piercing scream, the black cloud dissolving into the air as the fragment of Voldemort’s soul was destroyed. All that remained was the puddle of metal and the ruined table.

With shaking hands, James carefully closed the dropper over the vial and placed it back in his robes.

Vera rushed over to him and embraced him. “Oh, James!” 

“Careful,” he warned. “This is concentrated venom. If the vial breaks, we’ll both turn into a puddle.”

Vera carefully wrapped her arm around his shoulder and kissed his forehead, wiping the sweat from his brow. 

“You did beautifully,” Vera replied. “And, what that thing said...it isn’t true.”

James reached out and grasped her hand, holding it tightly. “I know.”


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera pays a social visit to Bellatrix and Lucius

“How did you manage to find Basilisk venom anyway?” Vera asked. 

She and James were lying in bed in their afterglow, idly watching the sun rise. The sounds of daily life in London as the day began pouring through the blinds of their window along with beams of sunlight. It was Saturday, so they could rest for the week before James had to rush again to work with the ICW, and Vera had to continue her work with the werewolves. 

In the light, James’s dark hair shone in flecks of copper, and his hazel eyes were more gold green then brown. His body was warm and tan against her pale, cold skin and she could feel his chest rise and fall against her head.

“It’s a funny story. Our department in the ICW is involved in trade and regulation of imported goods. It doesn’t take much effort to bluff my way into saying I need to make inspections or bring in the Aurors. I convinced a hag in Knockturn carrying it to get rid of it, and give it to me so I wouldn’t report her establishment’s other illicit wares and drop the matter entirely.”

“You tricked a hag into giving you the venom? Are you mad?” Vera hissed.

Hags were notoriously spiteful creatures, who held grudges for a very long time, generations even.

“Well, I didn’t really trick her, it was true, in a certain point of view. If it wasn’t for me, she really would have faced Azkaban time and had her inventory destroyed.” James argued. 

Vera rolled her eyes. “If you get cursed for it, don’t come to me for help.”

“But where’s the fun in that?” James replied. He kissed her then got up. “What do you want for breakfast?”

“I’m not hungry,” Vera protested, pulling the sheets around her and falling back into bed. James pulled them away, causing her to swear at him. 

“Then join me for a shower. I’ll make something and you can watch me eat it.” James begged, pulling her out of bed.

Vera pouted. “You only want to shower with me so you can use it as an excuse for sex.” While Vera made a fuss about it, she did enjoy their shower time. Though they had slipped more than once, and she still had the bruises to show.

“Of course not,” James teased, “If I don’t wash your hair for you, it’s not likely you will at all.”

Vera gave him a dirty look, but joined him anyway. He did give wonderful scalp massages.

Once they had cleaned up, James decided to make omelettes, while Vera poured coffee into the French press.

An owl flew into the window to deliver a letter. The envelope was flimsy and cheap, like it was hastily bought from a post office. James offered the bird some bacon and it hooted happily as he pet it. He examined the letter and handed it to Vera.

“Why wouldn’t Regulus use the Black family stationary to send this?” James wondered aloud.

Vera opened the letter and examined its contents. “He’s being monitored. Sent this from a delivery owl rather than his own. The Blacks don’t suspect anything, but he says his mother doesn’t approve of him going out unsupervised for too long.”

“He’s a bloody Death Eater, When is she going to learn to cut the cord?” James muttered. He gave the owl another price if bacon and sent it off with a wave.

“He says he’s found the location of the cup...and another one?” Vera exclaimed.

James rushed to her side to read over her shoulder. “Is he sure?”

“Yes, Lucius showed it to him, surprisingly. Wanted to show off how much our Lord favours him. It’s a small leather bound book.” Vera answered. She set the letter on fire and vanished the ashes.

“Is it another Founders artifact?” James asked.

“Looks like it’s personal. He says it’s labeled T.M, Riddle.” Vera replied.

“T.M.,” James said, rubbing his chin. “Dumbledore did say his name was Tom, so we have You-Know-Who’s full name.”

“Which Dumbledore already knows,” Vera pointed out.

“So, we steal them then. Who has the cup?”

“Bellatrix,” Vera replied grimly. James’s face fell. 

“Time is of the essence,” Vera continued. “She’s planning on sending it to the Lestrange vault in Gringotts soon, and it will be impossible to get at that point.”

———————————-

They arranged to meet Regulus at their flat for tea. A social call of course.

Regulus still looked like death warmed over: sallow skin, bags under his eyes, and much too weak. Vera checked his vitals. He would be fine eventually, just not now.

“Are you still on Dreamless Sleep?” She asked.

“I have to,” Regulus replied petulantly. “Otherwise the nightmares are too much and I wake up Mother.”

Vera frowned. “I’ll brew you a few more vials. No need to raise any more suspicion. And the pain potions?”

“Still on one a day, but the pain is less,” Regulus smiles weakly. “It’s really the nightmares that bother me, they’re just so...vivid.”

“That potion was a very powerful piece of Dark Magic, a weaker wizard would have died before we left the cave,” Vera responded. They locked eyes, and he blushed, praise was evidently too much for him.

“It was nothing. I just wish I could be what I was before.”

She wondered if he would ever recover. It was almost four months now.

“Are you urinating regularly?”

“Merlin and Morgana, Severa!”

“Your kidneys almost went through necrosis, you can’t take this lightly, Regulus.”

He sighed, “Yes, it’s all in working order down there. And unless you’re planning a full examination of my bits I’d rather we drop the subject.”

“We should move on to the task at hand,” James interrupted, bringing a piece of parchment in his hands. He set it on the table and unfurled it. It was a blueprint of Lestrange Hall. He tapped it with his wand.

“Vera’s placed bugs in the manor ever since meetings moved there full time, so we’re lucky that we have an advantage on the terrain. We’d mostly been using them for audio, but they’ve been able to explore the house and the grounds to its full capacity. We’ve even been able to scope out the hidden passages and secret rooms.” James explained.

“Bugs?” Regulus asked.

“Oh, silly me.” James pulled out a small golden ladybird and with a flick of his wand it opened its eyes and fluttered around the room.

“These beauties and scope out any place undetected, and their signature will create a schematic. They also record audio and can relay it back through a partner bug on our end. They’re so small their magical signature is weak, and they even are overlooked by the House Elves.”

“Incredible,” Regulus exclaimed, only for the big to repeat it back with his voice.

“They’ve been present at every Inner Circle meeting these past few months and they’ve been invaluable in saving lives.” James added.

“And killing other Death Eaters,” Regulus added. “If the Aurors didn’t show up to every other raid, we’d definitely still have Avery, and Jugson.”

“I’m sure their victims are devastated for their loss,” James replied sardonically.

“They had families too,” Regulus replied weakly. 

“So can the bugs show us where they’ve hidden the cup?” Vera asked, changing the subject.

James cleared his throat. “Somewhat. It can detect high levels of magical resonance. So it could be any sort of powerful magical artifact.”

“And in the Lestrange household, there could be hundreds,” Regulus muttered.

“But we can make a fairly accurate guess. The highest resonance is from the armory, which is in the dungeons. And another, smaller resonance is in the study.” James replied eagerly.

“So you are just going to try both and see if it’s in either place?” Regulus asked skeptically.

“Pretty much.” James answered. “Would you be able to make a replica of the cup in time?”

“I have one already, I commissioned it when I made the locket. I brought it with me.” 

Regulus reached over to his cloak and pulled it out of his pocket, evidently he had expanded them with Extension Charms. The cup was glistening gold, with intricate filigree of acorns and dancing badgers. He placed it on the mantle.

“Then we can make our move tonight. Or whenever we can get an in,” James replied.

“They’re transporting it on Monday by Goblin emissary, so tonight would be best. You just have to find a way to get onto the property undetected, which is impossible.” Regulus said.

“Then we won’t go undetected. I’ll pay a visit to Bellatrix, and James can take the cup while she’s distracted.” Vera proposed.

“Vera,” James pleaded. “We can find another way.”

“There isn’t one. I’ll be fine, trust me.” Vera replied, more confidently than she felt.

“And how does Potter expect to get through the house unnoticed?” Regulus asked with a sneer. James smirked.

——————————————————————

Vera wrote to Bellatrix, stating she had an urgent request and desperate need for her advice.

Bellatrix, in turn, replied promptly letting her know she could drop by in the evening. Rodolphus would be gone and she could use the company. She could use the floo into the main foyer. Vera assumed this was meant as an insult, since she would arrive covered in soot.

Vera arrived promptly at eight with James in tow under the Invisibility cloak. She silently cast a cleaning charm on both of them, and strode out the fireplace and into the main Parlour.

“Bellatrix,” she nodded at the woman lying languidly on a purple velvet chaise.

“Severa,” She smiled viciously, her teeth bared. “Come here and lie down with me, my sister in arms.”

Vera confidently walked towards her, and gingerly sat at the edge of the chaise. Bellatrix lifted her feet up, and placed them in her lap, her toes rubbing across Vera’s stomach and her thighs.

“What was this urgent matter you wanted to discuss?” Bellatrix asked in terribly feigned innocence. The heel of her foot dug down rubbing on top of her privates. Vera tried to maintain her composure.

“I have a moral quandary on my hands,” she began.

“Elaborate.”

“Well, as you know, our Lord had offered his services to me in a romantic sense.”

“Which you foolishly refused,” Bellatrix snapped. “It was more of a courtesy to you, our Lord does not derive pleasure in such intimacies.”

“Yes,” Vera replied coldly. “I was honored and overwhelmed by the offer. As such, I refused. I also wanted to remain true to my husband.”

“Your husband would have understood, if he knew what was good for him,” Bellatrix sniffed. “Roddy and I have an arrangement that suits us perfectly.”

She gave a mischievous grin. Her eyes looked manic, wide and like she was ready to kill. Vera kept her hand placed over her wand.

“May I ask the particulars?”

“No, you may not.” Bellatrix replied. She got up and repositioned herself facing Vera, their faces touching, her beautiful grey eyes staring into her. Subtly, Vera noticed an attack on her Occlumency shields but she remained impassive.

“Clever young thing, aren’t we?” Bellatrix purred, her hand stroking Vera’s face, then caressing her neck, before grabbing it tightly, her thumb pressed against her windpipe. Vera pulled out her wand and silently cast Diffindo, the blow forcing Bellatrix’s hand away, and leaving a gash on her palm. 

Bellatrix looked at the cut and laughed, moving her hand close to her full ruby red lips, and licked the wound. 

“You’ll have to do better than that.” Bellatrix took out her wand and cast the Killing Curse, But Vera rolled out of the way, barely dodging it. She cast a Blasting Hex, which Bellatrix blocked, then with a Protego Horriblis, sent back in her direction. 

Vera used the energy from the rebounded Hex to cast a modified Sheild Charm that absorbed energy and turned it to light. The intensity of the white hot light blinded them both, and Bellatrix screamed, covering her eyes.

They collapsed onto the ground. But Bellatrix stood up, feeling her way towards the other woman. Listening for her footsteps, the sound of her breathing, however faint Vera tried to make it.

“Not bad, Severa. I admit, I underestimated you. Let’s call it a truce. I won’t kill you tonight, and you can go free.”

Vera cast Expelliarmus. Bellatrix reached for the ground, looking for her wand until Vera cast a Body Bind.

“What’s in it for you, Lestrange? You don’t seem to be the charitable type.” Vera sneered.

“Oh, so we’re back to Lestrange now?” Bellatrix chuckled ruefully. “My, that was fast. Well, Potter. I can assure you I’m very generous when I choose to be. I’m our Lord’s favourite. I have supreme authority in this regard. You back off, and I will forget this little row of ours. But, if you decide to pursue him...I can make you wish your Blood Traitor whore of a mother never looked at your Muggle father.”

Vera grimaced. “Fine.”

She undid the Body Bind, and jumped out of the way as Bellatrix lunged at her. She missed, and headed straight into the wall. Catching her breath, Bellatrix fixed her posture, and adjusted herself. “Had to get that last one out of my system. Lovely to see you, Severa. Let’s do this again sometime, shall we?” From the murderous look in her eyes, Vera knew that sometime was around the time Avalon rose up from the mists again.

Vera glared at her. “Yes, that would be lovely.” 

Vera checked her watch, which was decorated with a ladybird. Its eyes would glow green when James gave the signal from his own bug that he made the switch. It was red. 

She turned to Bellatrix. “I would like us to be on better terms, Bellatrix. Do you think you could spar with me sometime? I’d love to learn how you mastered Protego Horribilis, and I’d be happy to show you the Light Blasting Hex. I’m sure someone of your talents could have suggestions on how to improve it.”

Bellatrix paused, carefully considering the offer.

“I will consider your offer. However, I think it would be best if we parted ways for now as I’m still seeing spots. Perhaps next week? Roddy will be free, and so will Rabastan.”

Vera paled. The odds of dueling the three of them unscathed were slim. Bellatrix noticed, and cackled. 

The ladybird’s eyed turned green. With any luck James was already at the fireplace.

“Yes, perhaps I can bring James along.” Vera suggested.

Bellatrix shrugged. “Do what you like.”

She had the House Elf walk Vera back to the fireplace. Vera grabbed a handful of floo powder from the bag in the House Elf’s outstretched hands. She was about to throw the powder down when she felt a hand on her shoulder. Oh, thank Nimue. James. She shouted her address and they went home.

———————————

When they returned to the flat, Vera took her aggression out the cup through painfully precise droplets of venom, watching Voldemort’s soul slowly writhe in agony. It felt good.

“Do you think the Goblins will notify them that the cup they’re sending over to their vault is a fake?” Vera asked.

“I doubt it. The Goblins are being paid to protect it, not give an appraisal. If anything, they’ll be happy charging the Lestranges extra to protect a dupe.” James replied casually, folding the cloak.

“Now, we have to find a way to get the diary,” Vera interjected.

James grinned. “That, I may be able to help with. Lucius has been asking us to come over for dinner for some time. I suppose he thinks I’m some sort of protege of his and he’s been trying to mold me.”

Vera snorted. “You? A protege for anyone?”

“I know, but I’ve been doing a fairly adequate job licking the Ministry boots. I almost sound like one of them sometimes,” he joked. “So I’ll write to dear old Lucy, see if he’s amiable to dinner and drinks.”

————————————————-

Lucius was happy to invite them over for a small get together. Drinks in the library and then an informal dinner on the terrace. Just them, the Malfoys, and a few other promising young drones in the Ministry. The ones who had the ear to the good and the great, and their complacent trust. 

James was the liaison to Grumby and any potential deals with the ICW, which was a reasonably useful. Among the other guests were Pius Thicknesse, junior recruit of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement; Mafalda Hopkirk, Assistant to the Secretary of the Department Of Improper Use Of Magic; Broderick Bode, a new asset of the Unspeakables hand-picked by Rookwood himself, and Frances Edgecombe of The Department Of Regulation Of Magical Creatures. Though the worst of all was the Junior Assistant to the Minister, Dolores Umbridge. She was insufferable, and no one could understand why Lucius invited her in the first place.

“Well, it would be in the best interest of the global economy if we could extend the rules of copyright to animal breeds. Breeders take pride and care in keeping their Hippogriffs in top form, and they put immense time and effort into maintaining their stud notebooks. Any subspecies they create, they should be able to monetize the offspring even after they are sold at auction.” Lucius argued over a glass of port. Thicknesse and Edgecombe seemed to contemplate this line of reasoning as they nursed their glasses.

“That’s all very well, but what about some of the unorthodox methods breeders take to determine attributes? Agility and Strength potions in utero is against Ministry regulations without special permission from a magizoologist,” Hopkirk responded, causing Lucius to give her a rather stern look. “Surely any advantages from ill-gotten gains don’t deserve to be patented.”

“Not to mention that these are living creatures, not things. If we patent breeds, then who’s to say we can’t patent physical traits from other beings, like potions ingredients or physical attributes?” Edgecombe added. “Of course, we know your stables are very reputable, Mr. Malfoy, this is just a theoretical debate.”

Lucius gave a thin smile. “Of course. It has been a most entertaining one. But mull over these points a little more. You might want to discuss them with your superiors.”

He turned to James. “Do you have any opinions on the matter, Potter? I’m sure you’d agree Britain could use the advantage compared to our foreign competitors in the east.”

James shrugged, taking an hors d’oeuvre from a House Elf circling the room (Asparagus and Smoked Salmon Canapés). “Personally, I have no opinion on the matter. I’d travel by broom over hippogriff any day.”

Lucius frowned. “Quite. Excuse me.” 

As Lucius circled the room, James struck up a conversation with Bode, while Vera was stuck for once with the spouses. 

“So, why are you here?” James asked. “Friend of Malfoy’s?”

Bode looked bewildered. “No, never met the bloke before in my life. He just introduced himself to me on my first day of work and offered me season passes to the Winbourne Wasps.”

James nodded. “They’re doing pretty well this year.”

“Bagman is the tops, inn’t he?” Bode grinned. “I know he’s trying to butter me up, but there’s really not much he can do. I’m called an Unspeakable for a reason. But I don’t mind the free stuff.”

“Can’t even tell little old me what you’re working on?”

Bode grinned conspiratorially and shook his head. “Sorry mate, I can’t.”

“Probably something mental like stopping death anyway,” James quietly joked, his eyes assessing Bode’s sudden stiff demeanor.

“Did Augustus tell you something?” Bode whispered. “He’s not supposed to!”

James casually sipped his negroni. “I only know as much as Lucius does. He was the one who guessed, or maybe someone told him.”

This of course, was a lie. But the first rule of making mischief was to know how to bluff. Either way, Bode began to sweat.

“There’s nothing more that can be done,” Bode muttered in a low voice. “I’ve told all I can, and I’m not acting this way because I oppose your cause...I just can’t say.”

James nodded. “I understand. Did he make you look over anything important?”

“You mean...the book? It was incredible. I’d never seen anything like it before. Though I can’t be sure if it’s genuine.” Bode gushed.

“Not here!” James hissed. “You can’t mention it, you can’t tell anyone where it is.”

Bode rolled his eyes. “I’m not an idiot. Besides, I think it’s pretty well hidden. Where better than in plain sight?”

James gaped, furtively looking at his surroundings. They were standing in the same room as the bloody thing and they hadn’t noticed. Well, maybe a little. The room had a stuffy unsettling feeling- like the centuries of dusty pages of Dark artifacts and stale air had created a heady perfume of rot.

“Hem hem.” 

James turned around to see a woman in her early thirties in a hot magenta tweed suit. She wore her hair in short curls and had a squat face.

“Mr. Potter, I don’t think we had been acquainted before. I’m Dolores Umbridge, Junior Assistant to the Minister.”

James tried to get help from Bode, but he was gone. Bugger.

“I’ve noticed Mr. Grumby has been lax in his maintenance of British interests in the ICW and I have a short list of suggestions from the Minister,” Umbridge continued, dragging James away to join the others for dinner.

————————————————

Meanwhile, Vera and Narcissa were forced to conduct small talk with Mr. Edgecombe (The others thankfully were unmarried), but he soon found himself called away on ‘business’ halfway through the first round of drinks.

They were alone together in a room full of people.

“Your husband is certainly in his element,” Narcissa noted as she saw James and Bode chatting.

“Yours more so,” Vera replied. “Thank you for inviting us. This was a great boon for James’s career.”

“We’re happy to help you and James, we think he can go far. But Severa, I’m worried this path might not be for you.” Narcissa said as gently as she could manage. It still sounded brittle.

“Is it my heritage, or my hobbies?” Vera asked sardonically, swirling her glass of wine. 

“Neither, and you know that. You are just much too strident. If James is going to move up the ranks, you’re going to have to change your approach to how you interact with others. Try a more feminine approach to speaking to men, they love that”

“I’m not going to change my personality to get my husband elected,” Vera muttered.

“That’s a very Hufflepuff thing to say, isn’t it?” Narcissa chided, causing Vera’s face to grow red.

“Before you have an outburst in my home, I’m trying to help you. I heard about your little stunt with my sister, and if it were up to her, so would everyone else. But, I am grateful for what you did for Lucius all those months ago. You saved him from an unpleasant fate, and you have our allegiance.”

Vera nodded. “I appreciate your support.”

“A good deed for something in return, I’d not expect anything else from a fellow Slytherin,” Narcissa replied, the ghost of a smile forming on her lips.

“Well, I am happy to be of service for any other good deeds you might need in the future,” Vera added. Having the Malfoys as allies would be invaluable, no matter what happened with the war. Having them as enemies would be devastating.

Narcissa bit her lip. “Is it true you are a skilled potioneer?” She whispered, almost inaudible. 

Vera nodded. “I never formally received my Mastery, but I’ve learned on the field and I conduct independent research.”

Notably, for the Dark Lord - Narcissa knew this.

Narcissa looked furtively, and tried to think of the most tactful way to say her request. As Vera waited, she focused her attention on James and Bode. Bode had suddenly looked stiff and anxious. Although he was quite a distance away, she gently probed his mind.

It was in the library.

“Do you understand my predicament?” Narcissa asked.

“Yes, of course I do,” Vera replied distractedly, scanning the room for the diary.

Narcissa gasped and grasped her hand. “Oh thank you! Thank you!” Excitedly, she brought Vera’s hands to hers and clasped them.

“When should we start?” Narcissa asked excitedly.

Vera blinked. She had completely ignored Narcissa’s request. She’d have to guess. “Do you know any varieties you have in mind?” In potions, there were always more than one variety, more than one method of brewing that effected anything from potently to color.

“I’ve heard the Estrus Solution is very effective, but I don’t know how to brew it on my own and I thought...well you would be willing to, for a price.”

Vera blushed. Oh fertility potions. Narcissa was almost five years older than her, she’d still be in her mid twenties. Did she really need them?

“I’ll do it for free,” Vera replied. “But I’d need to know your medical history.”

Narcissa nodded. “Yes, Of course. There’s not much to tell. I’ve had a few, well, not optimal experiences in the past and I want to make sure this one goes right. I need to. You understand don’t you?”

Oh, those big blue eyes looked so pathetic pleading at her. This was Narcissa Malfoy, she had never begged before in her life.

“I can make it in a week, but you’ll need to take it when you’re ovulating.” Vera replied. “And it’s not a guarantee it will work the first month. Sometimes it takes a year.”

Narcissa smiled. This one was genuine. “I’m willing to take the risk. Oh, do you think you could be able to select for a boy?”

Vera frowned. “It’s riskier choosing for the sex of the child.”

“A necessary cost.” Narcissa dismissed. “Can’t be helped, I’m afraid.”

Vera agreed, and they headed to the terrace. Narcissa eagerly spent the evening discussing baby names, and of Vera was going to have any of her own.

While they weren’t able to grab the diary that night, Vera was able to take it a week later, by walking into the empty library after dropping off the first dose of potion.

Since Regulus was the one who discovered it, he was given the chance to destroy it. His hands were shaky as he hovered the dropper over the diary, but as it hissed and screamed with each added drop, they became steadier.

As it turned to a puddle of ink and paper pulp, he laughed. 

“This is the best I’ve felt in ages!” Regulus exclaimed.

And for once, Vera had to agree.


	34. Chapter 34

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James deals with a personal loss

“So we have destroyed three, but what about the others? I assume we still have three to go?” Vera asked. 

They were sitting in Dumbledore’s office, strategizing their next move. They’d implemented the bugs into more Death Eater houses, opting to arrest some when proof of criminal activity was mentioned, and keeping others for recon purposes in the more valuable residences, such as Malfoy Manor. More Inner Circle Members were arrested, among them Igor Karkaroff, who was practically singing with how fast he was willing to talk in exchange for immunity. It was a big blow to the Death Eaters. Many of the Ministry workers, such as Rookwood, and Dolohov, had been brought into questioning but were released on probation. 

“We can only assume there are three, there could be lesser numbers than we suspect. For now, we can only make educated guesses.” Dumbledore replied, looking wan. The war had drained so much out of the once cheerful eccentric Headmaster. “However, I think we may have a lead.”

He revealed a small silver vial. Another memory.

“I took the liberty of looking a bit deeper into Tom’s past when you mentioned one of the Horcruxes was a personal item of his. I contacted a dear friend of mine, Bob Ogden, who was able to provide some insight from his own accounts. I think this will be most enlightening.”

After they stepped out of the Pensieve, they took a moment to breathe. James looked noticeably sick.

“That family, they were so horrid.” James remarked.

“It is terrible what some families will do in the name of blood purity. I have a few more memories I’ve acquired. I think this will paint a more in-depth picture of what we are looking for.” Dumbledore replied.

When they finished, Vera was the first to speak.

“So the locket is destroyed, but if he turned that into a Horcrux, he certainly did the same for the ring,” she concluded.

Dumbledore beamed. “My thoughts exactly. I do recall Tom wearing a ring similar to this one in his school days. It did cause a bit of a stir, but he promptly stopped wearing it shortly afterwards. Though I wouldn’t be wrong to assume this was around the time he was gathering followers.”

“So, should we check the Gaunts’ house to see if anyone would know the whereabouts of the ring? Even if no one is there, I’m sure there will be clues.” James suggested.

“My boy, I think we might be in for much more than that.” Dumbledore replied gravely. “Tom has a tendency to use locations if importance. I did a bit of research into the cave you had mentioned stored the locket. I believe it was where he had committed his first vile act as a child.”

“So the cave was a monument to his own exploits?” James pondered. “And I already thought he was an egomaniac.”

“That means it might be cursed.” Vera noted, “Or booby trapped.”

“Precisely,” Dumbledore agreed. “I will escort you on your trip to Little Hangleton…”

“Absolutely not, Professor. I mean, Albus. You’re too important to lose.” James insisted.

Dumbledore chuckled, but looked determined. “While I appreciate your concern, James, My life is no more important than either of yours.”

“And you want to make sure the job’s done properly, I suppose?” Vera asked. Dumbledore frowned at her suggestion.

“I do not doubt your abilities. Forgive me, Severa if you came to that conclusion. Perhaps I wanted to see the event for myself? Let an old man have his fun.”

Vera scowled, but relented. They would make the journey next week. 

“Any other places of significance in the Dark Lord’s life we should be aware of?” Vera asked.

Dumbledore furrowed his brow. “Wool’s Orphanage, possibly. And Hogwarts. I suppose it was one of the few places Tom felt truly aware of his power.”

“You-Know-Who wouldn’t have the gall to put a Horcrux in Hogwarts, would he?” James asked in disgust.

“There are only two times I could imagine him doing so, as a student or when he applied as a Professor. However, I’ve never been able to find any indication he might have done so.”

“It would fit his personality. Hiding it somewhere nearby, where you cannot find it, just to taunt you.” Vera remarked with a quirk of her lips.

Dumbledore sighed. “Perhaps. Though I’m certain that if anyone did know the school as well as I did, it would certainly be you, Mr. Potter.”

James grinned. “That’s possible, but I can’t really wander through the corridors anymore, I’m not a student.”

“About that. Would you be interested in the position of the new Defense Against the Dark Arts? I’m sure that would leave you ample time for rambles about the castle and it’s grounds.”

Vera fumed. James didn’t even really care for the subject that much when they were in school. If anyone had been as passionate about this, it would have been her. For Nimue’s sake, she was currently teaching it, to werewolves! But of course Potter would be asked.

James looked nervously at his simmering wife. “As honored as I am by the offer, Albus, I can’t accept. I would prefer to continue with my career in the Ministry as a liaison to the ICW. But, Vera would be a much better candidate. She’s mad about the course and could teach it blindfolded.”

Dumbledore chuckled. “I don’t think that occasion will arise. But, I’m not sure I can offer the position to you Severa, though I’m sure you are more than qualified.”

“Because of my association with the Dark Lord?” She asked.

“Yes, it would raise doubt in Tom’s trust in you if you suddenly and very publicly, had to answer to me. Also, I’m not sure if you are aware of the reputation of the job itself...needless to say, I do not want to risk your safety for this position.”

“I can handle myself,” Vera snapped. “But, if I can convince the Dark Lord that it is in his best interest to send me to you, would you hire me?”

Dumbledore looked at her shrewdly. “Perhaps I might.”

———————————————————————

The Dark Lord still visited from time to time to keep tabs on Vera and James, but he was an affable dinner guest. Even so, they were always on edge. One stray thought in front of one of the most powerful Legimens, and everything would be undone.

“My Lord, are you enjoying your meal?” Vera asked, hoping to distract Voldemort from his constant scrutiny. His gaze moved across the walls, as if he was scanning for something.

Voldemort turned his attention to Vera and gave a chilling smile. “Yes, it is delicious. My compliments to the chef.”

“Thank you,” replied James, trying not to stare.

Vera cleared her throat. “My Lord, I wanted to ask a request from you.”

Voldemort quirked his brow. “Oh? Continue.”

“Well, I was interested in applying for a position at Hogwarts.”

Voldemort casually placed his cutlery onto his plate. “I had heard Slughorn had retired. Though I never saw you as the type to go into teaching.”

“I’m not applying as a Potions professor. I’m applying for the Defense position.” Vera replied.

Voldemort laughed.

“Do you think Dumbledore would be willing to offer it to you?” He asked snidely.

“I’ve heard he’s gotten desperate. Term is almost starting, they’re going to have to pick someone new soon.”

“And you are certain the current professor isn’t planning on remaining at his post?” Voldemort asked, continuing to mock her.

“If they are interviewing, then I assume the last one is indisposed. I can prove myself to you My Lord, allow me this opportunity to infiltrate into Hogwarts and glean information from the inside. I’m sure as a staff member, Dumbledore will have to keep me in his confidence. Then, when he is complacent, we can strike.”

“Are you proposing an attack at Hogwarts?” Voldemort asked, frowning.

“No, that is above my place, My Lord. But Dumbledore seems to be more than just a symbol for the Light. Having someone monitoring him at a close level and undermining him at his side would be vital to our efforts,” Vera argued.

Voldemort stared at her with his bright red eyes, and studied her. Vera held her breath.

“Your suggestion has merit. Though, I’d prefer if you had applied for the Potions position, as you could stay for a longer period.”

“I looked into it, the position has been filled, by a Mudblood.”

Voldemort scowled. “What has Hogwarts come to? Perhaps you have a point, Severa. We need someone at the school promoting our values.”

Vera bowed lightly. “I’m glad you see my reasoning, My Lord.”

As Vera cleared the table, James brought out cups of coffee. Voldemort tapped it with his wand, as he had with the food. When he was appeased it was not tampered, he took a sip.

“There’s one last topic I’d like to address, then we can conclude our delightful evening,” Voldemort added.

“Yes, My Lord?” Vera asked.

Voldemort turned to James, facing him point blank. “I’ve been told from a reliable source that you have an Invisibility Cloak. Show it to me.”

James stiffened, then composed himself taking a shaky breath. He and Vera locked eyes, and she silently urged him to get it. Inaction was worse than refusal.

Quickly, James retreated to the bedroom, and returned with the pouch holding the cloak. Gently, he removed it with a fluid motion, laying it on the empty table. Voldemort gently ran his hands over the delicate fabric, admiring as his hand disappeared under it, and feeling the ancient magic in its fibers. He gently lifted it up, and wrapped it around himself, disappearing entirely.

“It is a family heirloom,” James remarked. “Probably dates back to the Merovingians, though we aren’t sure on the precise dates.”

“It’s looks like it,” Voldemort replied. “Judging from the texture, it must have been made from the skin of a Leithfold.”

“Yes, you’re correct,” James replied nervously. “It was handed down from my ancestor, Ignotius Peverell.”

Voldemort turned his attention on James. “Peverell? That sounds familiar.”

“Well, he and his brothers were the Three Brothers, from Beadle the Bard. I know, I thought it was a children’s’ story too. But if this is real, then so is the stone and the wand.”

“Wasn’t Grindelwald a believer in the Hallows?” Vera asked idly. Something about them seemed familiar to her, but she wasn’t sure how. “I always thought it was symbolic.”

“Grindelwald was a fool.” Voldemort replied as he kept examining the cloak. “He claimed to wield the Elder Wand, but he was still defeated.”

“I’m sure the Resurrection Stone would have been useful though,” James remarked, keeping an eye on the Dark Lord. 

“There are more effective ways of bringing back the dead,” Voldemort replied casually. “Inferi, for example, make excellent soldiers. I am keeping this.”

James’s face fell in shock, then turned to anger. “I can’t give it to you.”

Vera interrupted, “Ignore my husband, My Lord. We would be honored to give you this as a gift, and a token of our loyalty. If you will excuse me, I need to have a word with him.” 

Voldemort gave a nod of acknowledgement, and Vera dragged James away.

“Are you mad?” James screamed. “We can’t give that away to him, it’s mine!”

Vera cast Muffliato, and grabbed James by the collar. “Compose yourself. If you had refused him the cloak, he would have taken it anyway and killed you right on the spot. I need you alive, James.”

“But he can still kill us anyway, and take the cloak. We can’t have such a powerful artifact at his disposal. “Think of what horrors he could do!” James hissed

Vera frowned. “I’m well aware, but we have no choice.”

James gave a scream of frustration and punched the wall. He took a deep breath, and wiped his tears. “Over a thousand years of tradition and I’m the one to cock it up. I’m sure I’m a great addition to the Potter legacy.”

Vera gently touched his shoulder. “You’re doing what has to be done. And I’m proud of you.”

James smiled ruefully. “Lie to me later, we have an impatient dinner guest listening in.”

Despite her better judgement, she pulled him into an embrace and kissed him.

When they emerged, Voldemort was waiting. He stood outside their door, highly amused at their conversation.

“I won’t forget this. Thank you, James. Your loyalty is unquestionable.” Voldemort replied with an air of flippancy, taking pleasure in the young man’s shame and self-loathing.

James bowed his head. “The honor is mine, My Lord,” he choked.

Voldemort laughed at the poorly attempted lie, but let James squirm. He promised to return again. 

“I’ve grown quite fond of our little talks. You two make for entertaining company.” He remarked, before Disapparating.

“The only entertainment he derives from us is watching us suffer,” James replied moodily as soon as the Dark Lord was gone.

Shortly afterwards, rumors of the Dark Lord’s Invisibility spread like Fiendfyre. He was able to walk up to the Head of the DMLE, in front of his family on holiday, and shoot him in the back with a Killing Curse. He then massacred the whole ski lodge.

Next, was the orchestrated attacks on Order members. Dorcas Meadowes was caught off guard as he killed her in the middle of Diagon Alley, and left without anyone noticing his presence. Just because he could.

Whispers spread throughout Britain. No one could speak his name in fear, and now it was possible he could be behind you, unseen, ready to strike.

The public’s fears, however, only slightly diminished when word had gotten out that Head Auror Alastor Moody had seen through the Dark Lord’s Invisibility and had narrowly escaped with his life. He was not all-powerful evidentially.

It only made James feel worse as the guilt ate him from inside. He was almost unwilling to face his parents knowing their disappointment.

“I can’t go,” he protested.

“Their condition isn’t getting any better, James. At their age, it’s amazing they’ve been able to hang on this long after catching Dragon Pox, but it isn’t looking good.” Vera urged. “We might have to say our farewells.”

James held back the tears as they arrived at the Bluff.

His parents were in bed. They hadn’t been able to get up in months, permanently weakened by the pox. James was able to visit them weekly to provide potions and blood transfusions, but they could only prolong the inevitable for so long. 

“James!” Fleamont cried out, seeing his son.  
He had purple scars along his face, and a sickly green pallor to his skin. He coughed, and tried to sit up, but James urged him to lie back down.

“Wonderful to see you again, Dear,” Euphemia added. She had a glassy look to her eyes. But she was awake, for once. She was constantly in pain from the illness, and was mostly on Dreamless Sleep throughout the day.

“Mum, Dad!” James rushed to embrace his parents, who gave frail hugs in return as he sobbed. He wiped his tears. “Has Mopsy been taking care of you both?” 

“Of course she has!” Fleamont replied. “I just wish the old girl would let me have a proper roast every once in a while,” he grumbled.

“You’re still recovering, dear,” Euphemia chastised.

“How will I recover if all I’m having is soup and oatmeal? If I can’t get a decent meal I might as well die already.”

“Don’t say that,” James replied desperately.

Fleamont faltered. “I didn’t mean, oh dash it all. I’m terribly sorry, Jamie.”

“Once again, your father wasn’t thinking before he spoke.” Euphemia replied in exasperation, smiling at him fondly. “It was lovely to see you Jamie. Excuse me, but I might rest my eyes just a little.” Euphemia promptly rested her head on the pillow, and fell back asleep.

Fleamont frowned. “This is the longest she’s stayed up in days.”

“It’s gotten worse.” James noted. “Vera has been working on an alternative to Dreamless Sleep, maybe Mum could try it out, it might help with the pain too.”

Fleamont chuckled. “Don’t tell your mother, she’d jump out of bed and start trying to market it.”

Fleamont gave his son a smile, and held his hand firmly. “Your mother and I are proud of you, son. You’ve been so brave, and done so much. And we’re happy with the man you’ve become.”

James frowned. “You wouldn’t say that if you knew the truth.”

“I’ll always be proud of you, and I’ll always love you.”

“I gave the cloak to You-Know-Who,” James whispered in anguish. Fleamont frowned, and became contemplative.

“I’m sure you had a good reason.”

“No, it was a stupid one. I only relented because Vera told me she didn’t want to see me dead, and I was a coward and I agreed with her.”

“I agree with her too. We would want you to live. The cloak is just a thing, Jamie. Your life is more important.”

“But I caused the deaths of others. My actions have lead to innocents dying, and for what purpose? I thought I was going to do the right thing, but I don’t know what that is anymore.” James sat on the bed and leaned forward, his hands clasping his face. Fleamont patted his back.

“James, there is no right decision. There is no clear choice. No matter what we do, our actions have consequences. We just have to make the best of it.”

James turned to face his father. “There’s something else I’ve needed to confess, but I know you would hate me if I told you.”

“Nothing you could say would make me hate you.”

James was about to begin when Mopsy popped into the room with a tray of soup, urging James to give his parents some rest. Fleamont groaned.

“I swear I’ll drown in soup before this is over. Take care son, and remember what I said.”

James stayed overnight, and rushed to their room when a distressed Mopsy called for help in the wee hours. Fleamont had started to spasm, and his heart rate had gone too high. While James tried to bring it down through magic, there was nothing to be done. He died in his son’s arms. Euphemia died shortly afterwards in her sleep, almost as if she would have been unable to exist without him.

——————————————————————-

The funeral was a quiet affair. The burial was to take place on the family plot at the edge of the Bluff. Eighty people came to pay their respects, mostly cohorts in the Potions field, but also friends they picked up throughout their travels. Dumbledore paid his respects, so did Elphias Dodge, Bathilda Bagshot, Griselda Marchbanks, Moody, Slughorn, McGonnagal, Sprout, and the Marauders. James knee he shouldn’t be surprised to see Sirius, but he still was.

Sirius held James tightly as he cried at the ceremony.

“Like it or not, you’re still my brother. Always will be.” Sirius murmured. “Even if you have been a bit of a berk.”

“Oi, who’re you calling a berk?” James sniffled.

Remus and Peter joined them and they spent the rest of the day after the service catching up at The White Hart. They talked about nothing important, they couldn’t really, but it felt almost like the old days.

Peter checked his watch. “It’s late, I suppose we better head out.”

“Is it safe for you to drink and apparated? Why not stay over for the night?” James offered.

He shook his head. “Can’t. I left mum home alone.”

“I better be going too,” Remus added. 

“Do you have a place to stay, Remus?” Sirius asked. “You don’t have to go back to the commune.”

Remus gave a pained laugh. “I’m perfectly alright, Padfoot. But I’ll drop by soon, alright?” He turned to James. “You better head out too, I expect Vera will be getting concerned.”

“Vera?” Sirius asked. “Since when did we agree to call Scervix that? She doesn’t even like it.”

“It’s much too human,” Peter agreed, snickering. Remus frowned, wondering if it would be appropriate to mention that he wasn’t exactly human.

James stiffened, but let go of any retort he would have said back. 

“I heard old Scervix wheedled her way into becoming a Defense professor. Was that your doing, Prongs?” Sirius asked.

“All her, I’m afraid.”

“Won’t that be difficult? I’m sure being apart for so long is going to be challenging,” Remus added sympathetically. Vera had told him about the news already, and while he was disappointed she was going to have to stop with her visits to the werewolves, he understood. He was beginning to feel burnout himself.

“It’s only a year,” James shrugged. “I’ll manage.”

“That is if the curse doesn’t do her in sooner,” Sirius quipped. “Maybe we can drop by for a visit, take the cloak and give her a good scare?”

James’s face fell. “No, we can’t. I don’t think it would be a good idea.”

“He still is married to her,” Remus replied. “He might want to live to see another day.”

“Oh, you’re no fun Moony,” Sirius pouted.

James spoke up, “Thanks for being here, I can’t say enough how much this meant to me.”

“Of course, mate,” Sirius replied. “We’re always here for you.” He smiled, but it was strained, his eyes said what he couldn’t aloud.

James nodded, aware how deep the rift had become

They headed out the pub and apparated their separate ways.

As James returned home, Vera greeted him with a kiss. She was never very affectionate, but perhaps she was acting so out of pity. She’d greeted the guests at the reception, allowing him to have the time to catch up with his friends.

“How did it go?” She asked. 

“Better than I expected,” James replied. “Though I thought I’d faint when Sirius suggested we get out the cloak and try to prank you at your new job.”

“I’m sure Albus would look the other way,” Vera replied tartly. “But that does give us a clue. Whoever is a spy for the Order knew about the cloak from your friends, they must have told someone.”

James blinked. “They wouldn’t tell anyone about it, they swore they wouldn’t.”

“Perhaps it slipped out,” Vera remarked.

James thought about it carefully. None of his friends would let something that important ‘slip out,’- if they could keep their Animangi transformation a secret while at Hogwarts, they weren’t the type to casually reveal anything. So who could they have told? Partners? They were all single. And they weren’t particularly close to the other Order members. They were friendly, but he doubted there would be time between battles to mention schoolboy pranks.

Unless Voldemort found the information from interrogation, or Occlumency. Sirius was unlikely, so it was possible Remus or Peter might have been exposed to his powers.

Though Remus hadn’t been on any missions for the Order as of late, he’d been with the werewolves as he was on reserves, at least he said so. 

James sighed. Of course Peter would have been the only one present for skirmishes, and one stray thought would have been enough for Voldemort. If he had been captured, it could be much worse.

He expressed his thoughts to Vera, who furrowed her brow. “We never captured Pettigrew, I would have known. It’s possible the Dark Lord pried into his mind, But I doubt he’d have thought to look for someone as unimportant as Pettigrew.”

“Pete’s not unimportant,” James protested. 

“But he’s not the Order’s most valuable asset. I’ll look into it, and you could talk to Peter, see if you can get a timeline for when it could have happened.”

They agreed that it would be better to discuss this further once they returned to London. For now, they had to spend the night in the gloomy empty house, listening to the waves crash in the darkness as they held each other tightly.

————————————————————————

After postponing for the funeral, they made the journey to Little Hangleton. Dumbledore greeted them at the pub in the town’s square, and led them to the location of the Gaunt house based on maps and testimonies from the locals.

The hovel was hidden from Muggle view. They found protection tunes covering the shack, deadly and complex wards that could cause a hair trigger explosion if one move was out of sync. Carefully, Dumbledore and Vera unwound the wards, each one like a thread of magic in a complex braid. When it was finished, the ground shook. 

James tested the handle for curses, and opened the door wand out. 

As they suspected, the house was booby trapped. As soon as they entered, runes for heat glowed in the air, causing James to shout out counterspells as golems rose from the dirt and started to attack. James transfigured them into flowerpots, while Dumbledire and Vera looked for the ring.

When they found it under the floorboards where Merope had kept her treasures, Dumbledore reached out to touch it. Vera slapped his hand away. “It might me cursed!” She admonished.

Dumbledore shook himself. “Forgive me, my dear girl. I almost forgot.” 

He floated the ring into a small silk pouch and placed it in this robes. 

James joined them out of breath. “I think that’s the last of them, but I’m not sure. Let’s get out of here just to be sure.”

They sealed the shack in a protection rune, hoping Voldemort wouldn’t notice the wards were tampered with. He would, but by then it would be too late.

When they arrived back at Hogwarts, Dumbledore places the ring on his desk.

“Any suggestions as to how to dispel the curse, Severa?” Dumbledore asked.

She assumed he was humoring her, and frowned. “Nothing simple. Unless you want to go the easy way and have an animal touch the ring and find out. It looks like it will be passed through transference.”

“Then let’s try the more complicated solution.”

They spent hours diagnosing the curse, then diffusing it. When they were finished, Dumbledore lifted the Stone in his palm and turned it three times, only to see the shade of a young Tom Riddle.

“You are nothing, Old Man. You have failed your people and yourself. I have taken the one thing you have wanted, and I welcome your defeat.” The shade sneered.

“Ah Yes, I imagine we will have to destroy the Horcrux first. James, do you have the venom?” Dumbledore asked.

James handed the vial to the Headmaster, and they watched as he carefully dispersed each drop. “This gives me no pleasure, Tom.” He addressed the Horcrux as it screamed in agony, disappearing into a cloud of smoke.

Dumbledore examined the Stone. It had a large hole dissolved on the surface, damaging the symbol carved into it.

“Would you like to have a look, James?” 

He handed the Stone to James, who felt the smooth surface on his palm. He examined the symbol and grinned ruefully. “One of the Hallows for another, an even trade.” Carefully, he turned the Stone three times, and his parents appeared in front of him, in a their former glory.

“What did I tell you, old boy? You did it!” Fleamont cheered.

“Darling, we’re so proud of you,” Euphemia beamed. “Our beautiful boy, you’ve done so much. And thank you, Severa, for being there for him.”

Vera blushed, surprised they acknowledged her at all.

“Is that really you?” James asked nervously.

“Of course it is!” Fleamont replied. “Though is say we look a bit better since you last saw us. Can’t say I won’t miss the pock marks!”

“We’ve missed you, Jamie. But we can’t wait to see you on the other side,” Euphemia added. 

“What is dying like?”

They paused, their faces faltering before returning to their serene smiles.

“It is like falling asleep,” Euphemia replied calmly. “A beautiful sleep. One where you feel the stillness of the world and your pain melt away.”

James frowned. “There’s so much I wish I could have told you before you left me.”

“Is it about you and Severa spying for the Order?” Euphemia asked.

James stared at him. “You...you knew? How?”

Fleamont smiled. “We know you James. We suspected from the beginning, but we didn’t want to compromise your cover. I assume Severa is in on it too?” 

Severa nodded, as James was too stunned to respond.

“Jolly good.” Fleamont smiled. “Chin up, old chap. You’re a fighter, but more importantly you’re a Potter. Give them Hell.”

“But not too recklessly. We hope to still have grandchildren in the future, even if we don’t see them,” Euphemia added. His parents smiled as they held hands. “Au revoir, Jamie. We love you so much.”

James gave a weak smile, tears in his eyes as he waved his parents farewell the final time.

He handed the Stone back to Dumbledore. “Thank you.”

“I should be thanking you both,” Dumbledore replied. “I will see you Severa at the start of term, and hopefully I will see you again soon, James. Could you see yourselves out? I’m afraid I have some urgent business to attend to that I’ve put off for quite some time.”

Vera couldn’t help but notice Dumbledore staying at the Stone.

They said their goodbyes and headed back out the tunnel to Hogsmeade. They stopped into the Hog’s Head for a drink and toasted to their victory. While there, Vera said hello to Travers, who was stopping by to see a contact. 

The mask must stay on, even when it’s off.


	35. Chapter 35

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vera finds the Diadem, and causes irreparable damage

Teaching was nothing like Vera expected. The brats would not behave, and they were just so stupid and childish, and loud. And they were so hormonal. You could smell it on them. Were all children like this? She certainly didn't remember acting this way.

These children were so spoiled, so entitled. They wanted to sit and have her say what was going to be on the exam, how likely it was to get an E, putting in the minimum effort to learn. Vera supposed It was different than her other teaching experiences. In her Death Eater group at Hogwarts, learning a spell properly was the only way to survive the brutal free-for-all duels. And the werewolves were so desperate to learn anything that they worked as hard as they could to get to even the most basic skill level.

There hadn't been any difficulty getting approved by the Board of Governors. Her status as a Death Eater was not widely known, but her marks and her marriage to James Potter were, and it made an excellent counterbalance to a Muggleborn Potions Master, the first since the founding of Hogwarts.

Lily was pleased at least. When she'd see her in staff meetings, she always made sure to leave a seat next to her. While it had been an adjustment getting to know her former professors on a different level and becoming colleagues with them, it was easy talking to Lily. They would grade papers together in the teachers' room, and chat about the days events. It was almost like the old days. Vera even let herself reminisce and daydream of the time they were together. She watched as Lily attentively marked each assignment, her hair glinting copper in the firelight, the sound of her quill fervently scratching against the parchment. Lily looked up from her work, and noticed her. Their eyes locked, and Vera was mortified to have been caught.

She was grateful that Filius had walked in, carrying a handful of scrolls.

"I see our newest professors are hard at work!" He squeaked. "Mind if I join you?"

"More the merrier!" Lily declared. "Though Vera and I were just finishing up."

Filius asked them how they were adjusting to teaching, and Lily went into great detail about how promising and bright her students were, and how they were admittedly a bit rough in their brewing skills, but just needed some guidance. Vera snorted. These children were idiots. She doubted a rigorous study plan would do them any good.

"And you, Severa?" Filius asked suspiciously. "I trust your classes are going well?"

He, as well as the other Heads of Houses, we're still wary of her. They hadn't entirely forgiven the mass suspension in her sixth year and blamed the mess solely on her. By hiring her, they thought Albus was rewarding her for her for her past delinquency and she was going to teach Dark curses and hexes to impressionable children. Vera also expected that they might be Order members, and would surely have seen her name on the map by now.

"Very well, thank you." Vera murmured. "We've covering Redcaps." A bit beneath the skill level they should be at, but her students were so underprepared they were already struggling.

"I had a nasty encounter with a Redcap myself back in my youth…" Filius began.

He continued his story, Lily listening wide-eyed, while Vera finished her essays, deciding to give all As. When she was finished, she promptly made her exit, hoping Lily would follow shortly.

Much to her delight, Lily did follow.

"Vera, wait up!" She cried.

When she caught up to Vera, trying to catch her breath, she smiled.

"Thought you were avoiding me," Lily said.

"I would never do that," Vera replied.

"Good. Since we're not Heads, I was thinking we could have dinner together- either at your quarters or mine?" Lily offered. Her hair was disheveled, her face flushed, but she looked so beautiful and free. Her eyes were shining and so bright.

Vera felt the heat rise up in her face. It was an innocent request. They had parted years ago, as friends. And they were both married. She loved Gideon. And Vera loved James.

But she still felt so nervous, so eager in Lily's presence. It was still so hard.

"I'd love to," Vera replied quietly.

"Brilliant! Let's meet at yours. I need a change of pace from the dungeons," Lily grinned. She wrapped her arm around Vera, who shrugged but let her keep it there.

They talked for a little while longer, before heading to their chambers. Vera scrambled back, thinking about how she was going to need to tidy up before Lily arrived. Of course, the House Elves cleaned up after her, but her quarters needed to be perfect.

Lily arrived around eight. The House Elves brought soup and sandwiches, and Lily thanked them.

As they ate, they discussed all the things they'd missed as they'd been apart. Mostly debating magical theory they had read in journals, or possible substitutions to potions.

Vera had even mentioned a useful catalyst she'd experimented with in a batch of Embolism Inducing Elixir before stopping herself. The look of horror in Lily's eyes as she had discussed the increased potently meant she had said too much. She was about to leave the table when Lily reached out and grabbed her hand.

"You don't need to worry, Vera. I'm glad everything is out in the open and that you trust me. It's just hard to accept, you know?"

Vera sighed. "I suppose us reconciling would never be easy."

"But it's worth it," Lily replied, squeezing her hand. Vera stared into her eyes as she felt Lily's magic pulsate against hers, and wished desperately she could kiss her again.

Lily must have noticed, because she let go. "How is James?" she asked, clearing her throat.

"Fine. How's Gideon?" Vera clipped.

"Fine."

Lily bit her lip and looked away. "Can you show it to me?" She asked.

"You mean the Mark." Vera said blankly.

"Yes. What does it look like?"

Vera carefully lifted up her sleeve, resting her arm on the table. Lily gasped.

"It's horrible." She gently grazed the tips of her fingers over the scarred flesh, and Vera winced from the delicate touch. While she craved Lily's touch, anything touching the Mark caused an intense pain shooting throughout her arm.

"Was it worth it?" Lily asked mournfully.

"No. But it had to be done." Vera replied.

"Did it?" Lily questioned. "Vera, are you happy with your choice?"

"My happiness is not my primary concern. James and I had a goal, and we have almost completed it. That's why I'm even here, to see if Ravenclaw's diadem is in the castle."

Lily replied jokingly, "And here I thought you were staying for little old me."

Vera huffed. "I've tried the library, but it's useless. It's just reiterated that the lost diadem is well, lost."

"I could have told you that!" Lily exclaimed. "But, perhaps the library isn't the best place to look."

"What do you suggest?" Vera asked.

"We could try the portraits, then maybe the ghosts."

"I doubt either of those will be helpful."

Lily shrugged. "It's worth a shot. Though we'll have to try the older ghosts, like the Friar, the Bloody Baron, and maybe the Grey Lady? Does she speak even?"

"If she does, it would only be to Ravenclaws." Vera muttered.

"Well, we should at least try. She must be the House ghost for a reason. I'll try the Grey Lady, you try the Friar and the Baron."

"Give me the arduous task, why don't you?" Vera scowled.

"You were a Slytherin. Perhaps he'll be more favorable towards you."

He was not.

The friar was easy enough to talk to, but he was always going on about food. What food was served at which feast, and how the feast sat his time at Hogwarts were infinitely more abundant. Vera listened to him go on in such a tangent before finding out he hadn't even attended Hogwarts until the twelfth century, well after the diadem went missing.

The Baron was silent and haughty at her requests, and soon resorted to floating out of the room when he saw her.

The portraits were of no help. Many were installed after the Founders era, and the ones estimated from around that time couldn't talk.

And so the year passed. Vera became caught up in her classes, and caught up with Lily. She wondered if it was obvious, her infatuation, but they never addressed it aloud. Instead, they would meet up for dinner, or stroll through the grounds.

Classes were improving, even the other professors were beginning to tolerate her. And if she felt bored or frustrated, she could just take off points from the students. It was a bit of a rush after all, having what little power she had. Though Lily would complain when she took off points from Gryffindor, and she couldn't have Lily stay mad at her.

James would write when he could, so would Remus occasionally - writing about their students' progress. She was almost proud of what they'd achieved.

Vera and Lily has decided to meet at the Astronomy tower to discuss their progress.

"I think I've gotten through to her," Lily said. "She is so lonely, she just needs someone who is kind to her and understands her."

"So she's willing to talk?"

"Almost. I've been able to get her to tell me her name, and we discuss books."

"What about the diadem?" Vera asked impatiently.

"These things take time, Vera. But if anyone would know where it is, I'm sure it's Helena. Did you know she was Ravenclaw's daughter?"

Vera's eyes widened. "No, but that's a good lead. What else has she said?"

"Not much else. But she does feel that she was in her mother's shadow. Who could blame her, really? I told her about how I sometimes felt overlooked by my Mum and Dad. Sure, they were always so understanding and encouraging of my place in this world - But I always felt it was a bit forced. They would just be so happy for what little Tuney accomplished, and I had to prove myself. They'd never really understand me, but they were always closer to conventional, normal Petunia." Lily added bitterly.

"Why did you never tell me before?" Vera asked.

"I didn't want to bother you, you had enough going on at home." Lily replied, brushing it off.

Vera moved closer to Lily, wrapping her arm around the other woman. Lily rested her head on Vera's shoulder as they watched the sunset. The wind fluttering across their faces as their hearts beat in tandem.

"Vera?"

"Yes?"

"Do you still love me?"

"Always."

Lily pulled herself closer to Vera, snuggling against the warmth of her body. Vera could feel her magic buzzing against the two of them. Pure love, intoxicating and overwhelming.

Without thinking, Vera kissed her. Lily screamed, and pushed her away. "What was that?" She demanded.

"You asked me, and I thought...I thought you were trying to tell me you still had feelings for me," Vera replied weakly.

"I'm married! You're married! I love Gideon. And I don’t know how you really feel about James…"

"I love him too," Vera mumbled. "But it's complicated. I will never stop loving you, Lily. Even if you feel fit to discard me."

"You can't stop thinking about yourself, can you? I thought we could be friends again. But I guess we can't. Vera, don't think about what you've done to me. Think about how much this could hurt James." Lily stormed angrily out of the tower.

Vera curled herself into a ball and took a deep breath, trying to hide the pain behind her tears.

"It never gets any easier," a silvery voice declared.

Vera lifted her head to see the Bloody Baron floating in front of her.

"How much of that did you hear?" She asked.

"You give yourself wholly and freely, and they just reject you. It aches to your very core." He rambled mournfully.

"Who...who was your love?" Vera asked, hoping to take the subject off of her failures.

"Helena!" He sobbed.

"Helena Ravenclaw? What happened?"

"She rejected my advances, and I annihilated her. Dispatched my love with my own sword in anger when she had fled to Albania."

"I'm sure you didn't mean it," Vera replied. "You were hurt, and in your hurt you acted rashly." She thought of her own outbursts when she was with Lily, and during her marriage to James. They were infrequent compared to her father's. She had sworn she would never be like him, but found herself falling into those habits. It terrified her.

"But nonetheless, I killed her. And I must atone for it, hoping in vain for her forgiveness," he cried.

Vera didn't want to tell him that seemed unlikely.

"Why are you telling me this?" Vera asked

"Because you understand. And you and your love seek the diadem. Helena had taken it to her father's land of Albania, and that is where I found her. I do not know where she left it." The Baron replied.

Vera stood up, and acknowledged the ghost. "Thank you, Baron. I am very grateful you were willing to share this with me."

The ghost nodded, and floated away.

How was she going to go to Albania in the middle of the school year?

She wrote to Albus, asking for a sabbatical but was denied. She'd have to go during the summer. She made travel arrangements through Muggle means, and booked a guide who spoke the language. James would probably join her, she wouldn't be able to stop him if she tried. There was turmoil in the area, both magical and Muggle, and she'd have to be discreet to not raise the Dark Lord's suspicion. Though any sort of travel to Albania would do so anyway. She mentally prepared herself for a long trek in the fierce Albanian woods battling giants, werewolves and vampires.

What she had not prepared for was finding her plans completely upended by sheer chance.

Lily was still angry at her, and she hadn't figure out how to broach the subject. She hadn't written about it to James either. She couldn't handle the thought of him getting upset.

So she took to setting up dummies in her classroom and letting her students blast them. She gave demonstrations first, of course.

As she circled the Third Year Hufflepuffs, she silently listened in on the idle students while she appraised their the casters. To the outside eye, she was engrossed in the students blasting their hexes, but she always kept an ear out for the whispering behind her back.

"I don't know how I'm going to tell my mum I lost by left shoe. This is the third pair!" Complained Eugenia Smith, a sullen girl with blond hair in pigtails.

"Have you tried looking in the Come and Go Room? There's usually something there." Replied Amy Roberts, a smaller girl with dark short hair. She was one of Vera's problem students.

Vera had never heard of this before, and she thought she was familiar with every inch of the school.

After class, she made Amy stay after class to discuss her marks on her latest essay on Boggarts. As she questioned the girl, she quietly examined her mind to find what she needed.

Seventh floor, left corridor. Across from the tapestry. Walk past it three times.

She gave the girl extra reading, and sent her on her way.

Vera had to wait until the day was over to test out her theory. And each class she was getting more impatient. She had upset a second year when she instructed her on wand movement. Apparently shouting that they had the grace of a possessed Nundu was a little too much, and the girl burst into tears. She'd probably get a complaint from Albus.

Finally, after the last class (NEWT for the Gryffindors, useless imbeciles), she locked her classroom and headed for the Seventh floor.

Quickly, she turned left and made her way to the tapestry, and passed the room thinking of what she needed to express.

I need Ravenclaw's diadem. I need Ravenclaw's diadem. I need Ravenclaw's diadem.

When the door emerged from the corner of her eye, she stopped pacing abruptly, eager to open it before it disappeared.

Inside was an empty room with Ravenclaw's diadem placed the stone floor.

She swiftly reached for the diadem, examining that yes, it was real. She stowed it in her robes and walked out the room, watching as the door dissolved into the wall.

Vera could feel the malevolent energy emanating from it. Her exposure to the previous Horcruxes made it all the more obvious as she felt its heat press against her body. She felt tired, and angry. Mostly at herself, for messing things up with Lily, and for hurting James. She was going to have to write to him soon, but did she have to? She could wait. Anything would be better than having to face him. Perhaps she could keep the diadem for herself? It was much too precious to destroy.

When she returned to her quarters, she took the diadem out of her robes and examined the intricate metalwork. There were sapphires embedded in the base, with a large teardrop at the top, and a transcription carved in Welsh.

Vera thought about trying it on, it would make her forget.

She shook herself out of her reverie, and threw it into her dresser.

She locked the drawer and resolved to write to James that very evening. He'd have to make a visit to the castle to destroy it immediately.

—-

Vera waited by the Whomping Willow. James would meet her outside the tunnel, and they'd destroy the diadem in the Shrieking Shack.

It was a cold November day, the sun was already dipping in the sky at five o'clock, and she wrapped her cloak tight around her to cover her face from the wind. She could feel the diadem like it was a hot coal in her pocket, almost as if she didn't need a warming charm. What was taking him so long?

As she waited, she noticed a creature in the distance.

"There you are!" She greeted. The stag looked up at her at stood perfectly still.

"Well, aren't you going to come over her?" She asked impatiently.

Slowly, the stag walked toward her, and they were standing in front of each other. Vera sighed and knelt down, wrapping her arms around the stag's neck.

"I'm so sorry, James. I've missed you so much."

"Should I give you two a moment?"

James stood behind her, laughing as she gasped. The stag wriggled out of her grip, bleating and galloped away.

"You think you'd be able to tell by now!" He laughed hysterically.

"I...I have a lot on my mind right now, and I thought maybe you'd decided to go incognito." Vera protested.

"I'm amazed it came so close to you though. Any powers to commune with deer I was unfamiliar with?"

"If I did, I'd be your undoing," Vera mumbled.

The crawled into the passageway, narrowly avoiding the swinging branches. They entered the Shack, which was somehow still standing, and placed the diadem on the floor.

"Would you like to do the deed?" James asked.

Vera nodded.

She undid the dropper from the vial and watched the first drop fizzle into the metal. Instantly, an apparition appeared from the diadem.

"Deceiver! Liar! Unfaithful!" It screamed.

The voice changed, this time to Lily's.

"Vera, don't think about what you've done to me. Think about how much this could hurt James!"

She winced. In her shock, she dropped the vial of venom. The rotted wood dissolved into a hole on the floor. Vera stared helplessly at their last hope of destroying the Horcrux.

The cloud became larger, filling the room with black smoke.

"Liar! Adulteress! Jezebel!" It screamed.

"What's going on?" James coughed.

The fumes had a toxic smell as the black cloud grew stronger.

"Vera, we have to get out of here," James urged.

"Selfish whore, slut, CHEATER!"

Vera cast the incantation for Fiendfyre and watched as the flames spurt out of the wand at a fierce intensity, like a highly pressurized hose. She held steady, and tried to control it.

"Vera!" James shouted in distress, but she had to hold on with all her might. One wrong move and they would be devoured by the flame, along with all of Hogsmeade.

The smoke and the Fiendfyre melded, the black cloud screaming in rage as the house shook, the roof starting to collapse. The air was thick with smoke and it was impossible to see. Almost.

With the last piercing scream, as the fire surrounded them, she undid the incantation.

Instantly, the fire burnt out, almost like a gas flame, leaving nothing but ash floating to the sky.

Quickly, James dragged her back down to the tunnel as the Shack collapsed above them.

"What was that? Have you gone mental?" James shouted as the crawled back towards the castle.

"I dropped the vial, it was our only option," Vera replied blankly.

"Well maybe we could have discussed this before burning the Shack with one of the most dangerous forms of Dark Magic." James huffed. "I'm sure everyone saw that, it will be a miracle if we aren't caught and arrested for arson."

"We have alibis, I'm visiting you for the weekend. That's what we'll say if they ask."

As they headed out of the tunnel, James transformed and headed to one of the back passages into the castle. Vera followed him. Once inside, he transformed back and they headed to the tunnel that was covered by the Humpback witch. James lead the way, casting Lumos as they walked in silence.

"What was it yelling about, you being a Jezebel?" James asked, his brows furrowing.

"I kissed Lily."

James stopped walking.

"What? Why would you do that?" He asked, his voice cracking.

"I don't know. I just caught up in it all. We were back at school, we were friends again. I just wanted to go back to how it felt before." Vera replied desperately.

"That's a terrible reason, Vera," James growled.

"Don't you think I know that?" She cried.

They were crouched in the halfway point of the tunnel, the dim light barely reaching their faces. Vera could see James was so sad, so hurt. It killed her.

"Do you even love me at all?" He asked sounding pained.

"Of course I do. But I love her too. And it's...it's just so difficult."

James sighed, shaking his head. "I know. And the Horcrux mission hasn't been the easiest on either of us."

"And the cloak, and your parents. I'm so sorry."

Janes closed his eyes tightly. He took off his glasses, and wiped his face. "Please, don't apologize."

Vera wiped away her own tears and composed herself. Place your emotions locked away in your mind, lose the key. "Very well then. I won't. I can't change what's happened anyway."

They kept walking, and once they reached Honeydukes, checked to see if there was anyone present.

The cellar was empty. As they entered the shop, it was also empty, though the store would normally still be open for another two hours. As they made their way out the door, they noticed a large crowd gathered outside the Shrieking Shack. It seems as if the whole town had gathered to witness the charred remains of the most haunted building in Britain.

Quietly, James and Vera snuck out of the village square and apparated to their flat in London.

They made tea, and sat silently drinking it gloomily.

"So, we're done." James declared. "He's mortal."

"We can't be sure." Vera replied. "He could have made one more, to complete the full seven."

"Then you're dealing with that one on your own," James grumbled. "I'm sick of this."

He took her cup to the sink along with his and washed them.

"I better head back," Vera said. "I told them I'd be back in time for patrol." She lifted her wand.

"Did she encourage you?"

Vera stopped. "With what?"

"Did she want you to kiss her?" James asked.

"No. The Horcrux did show what she said. She was angry at me for doing it. And I deserved it."

"Well, she's right." James replied angrily.

"What does this mean then, for us?" Vera asked.

"I need time to think about it, but I know for certain that you've broken something. I don't think I'll be able to trust you again." James said thoughtfully, looking away from her.

Vera nodded. "I understand."

She apparated back to the bridge at Hogwarts at her scheduled return time.

When she had finished her patrol, she found a small envelope on her desk. Dumbledore's stationary. He requested her presence, promptly.

When she arrived at his office, Dumbledore was sitting at his desk. Fawkes was sitting on his perch preening, completely ignoring her.

"Severa, have a seat."

"Sir, about the Shack."

"So, that was your doing then? I'm impressed with your control of the curse. Though it will make my life a bit more complicated for the next few weeks."

"Am I to turn myself in, Sir?"

Dumbledore's eyes twinkled. "I don't think that's necessary. Was that the last one?"

"As far as we've guessed. But he could have one more, to make the full seven."

"Ah, that is where Tom's arrogance arises. He accounted his list of Horcruxes for all Four Founders. However, there is only one artifact of Godric Gryffindor's."

Vera tried to drum up her knowledge from Hogwarts: A History. "His Sword?"

"Precisely, my dear. While its whereabouts remain a mystery, we can certainly say it is not in his possession, nor has it even been. So, that six spot is vacant."

"So, he is mortal once more." Vera concluded.

"Wherever the direction the war takes, at least it is now on even footing."

—-

The next Inner Circle Meeting was a terrifying experience. While the arson attack at Hogsmeade was discovered to have been caused by Fiendfyre, no one could claim to have caused it, nor was it ordered by the Dark Lord. There had been traces of metal found at the scene, but they were too badly damaged to identify by magical means.

"Perhaps they are creating a false flag?" Nott suggested.

"With Dark Magic? The Order wouldn't stoop to that," Rowle scoffed.

"But the Aurors might. They've been given carte blanche to use Unforgivables." Rosier added.

"Good! Now it might be interesting fighting those buggers!" Rabastan shouted.

"What remains to be seen," Voldemort interrupted, "is why someone would want to plant this insignificant vandalism on us, and if it is worth looking into. Lucius, see what's being said at the Ministry. Travers, ask your little friend to have a chat with you."

Vera had tried to find the identity of the spy from Travers, but his Occulmency shields were solid. Not as good as hers though. She caught a glimpse of blond hair, and watery blue eyes. Could it really be him?

"Onto other business," Voldemort added. "I've received a bizarre request from Fenrir Greyback. He wishes to attend one of our meetings."

There was a chorus of laughter at the thought. Voldemort raised his hand, and it instantly quieted. They murmured in panic.

"I say we let him attend. In fact, I've agreed to have him pay a visit today."

Voldemort waved his wand and opened the massive bronze doors to the ballroom as the Death Eaters parted to form a path. Vera paled underneath her mask. She was doomed.

"Don't be scared," Regulus whispered, "He's just a werewolf."

Greyback snarled at him, and he flinched in terror. Greyback laughed. He was holding his wand in his hand.

"Welcome, Fenrir. I am glad to receive you," Voldemort greeted with disdain.

Greyback bowed. "Greetings, My Lord. I come before you on behalf of the werewolves to suggest a greater partnership in our alliance, and to collect."

Voldemort looked amused. "Collect?"

"You promised when we aligned, greater control of our lands, and more freedom from the Ministry under your protection. Well, the odds have changed, and we find you haven't been as forthcoming in our agreement."

"I take it that you feel that you don't need our protection anymore now that you have a...wand of some sort," Voldemort replied.

"It's probably stolen!" Mulciber shouted

"No, looks like a shoddy homemade job," Rookwood jibed.

Greyback growled.

"My Lord, I'm grateful for all that you've offered, but we can easily take our services elsewhere."

"Even though the Ministry has the right to kill on site any werewolf with a wand? It defies the Beasts and Beings bylaw of the Statute Of Secrecy."

Greyback grinned. "The Ministry can't stop us. They're too overwhelmed dealing with you lot. You had the magic, we had our power of the moon. Now, I do t see an even trade."

"So, you want to renegotiate?" Voldemort asked, rage simmering inside of him.

"It would be in your best interest," Greyback replied.

"Can you use your wand, like a proper wizard?" Voldemort taunted. "Why don't we test your skills? Let's duel."

Greyback cockily grinned.

They stood in the center of the ballroom, their wands to their faces, and bowed.

It was evident from the start that his wand was woefully underprepared for a duel. While Voldemort deftly cast creative curses, and Greyback dodged them with speed and agility, when it came to his turn the spell would not cast. There would be sparks, but nothing would emerge from the wand. He was using nothing but his quick reflexes and animal instinct, but Voldemort was the greatest dueler of the past few generations. It was an uneven fight even with a proper wand.

"Looks like the dog can't learn new tricks after all!" Malfoy jeered.

Soon, other Death Eaters ignored the rules and cast their own spells towards him, into the fray as they laughed.

"Pitiful display," Crabbe said.

"Shows a lack of intelligence," Goyle agreed.

Greyback's body was pelted with burns, welts, cuts, and magical infections turning his skin purple. He roared.

"I'll kill you!"

"I'm beyond Death!" Voldemort shouted.

The werewolf lunged toward him, and cast a Blasting Hex on the werewolf's arm, his wand hand shattering in a rain of blood and muscle, and his wand exploding into a million pieces, splinters dogging into his body.

The wolf fell to the ground, howling in agony.

Voldemort walked up to the supine werewolf and kicked him in the stomach.

"I will let you live, because I am merciful," he taunted. "You are to return to your pack and break any other wands available with your teeth. Tell them to stop this nonsense."

"You did this on purpose," Greyback growled. "You went to all this effort, just to humiliate me."

"I wouldn't have to try very hard if I had."

"You bastard!" Greyback growled. This time he received a Cruciatus and howled in pain.

"Leave. Never return." Voldemort ordered.

As Greyback stood up, he held his stump to his chest, covering it with his dirty jacket. He pointed his remaining hand at the crowd of Death Eaters.

"None Of you are safe! I will be avenged. And you will never know true peace once I take what you hold dear." He stared at Vera, and gave a wicked grin.

Dolohov sent an Imperius in his direction and commanded him out the door.

Vera knew she was doomed, and possibly James too. she knew it was all her fault.


	36. Chapter 36

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end of the werewolf saga

Any thought that this slight would be forgotten was immediately shattered when the werewolves very publically ended their truce with the Death Eaters by attacking their heirs. 

The first was dismissed as a fluke, Nott’s son was illegitimate, and he was expecting a proper heir on the way. 

Then Avery’s daughter was attacked, and she died from her injuries. 

Soon, most of the Inner Circle has a family member affected. Crabbe’s brother, Rabastan’s wife, even the Jugsons and they weren’t a prominent family.

Their most prominent kill was Druella Black. Bellatrix has been providing her own retribution since the beginning of the attacks, it was inevitable the most vicious would occur on her own mother. Narcissa had to identify the body, and she was inconsolable for weeks. While Vera had never thought they were acquaintances, let alone friends, she had this sickening gnawing in her stomach when beautiful Narcissa wrapped her arms around her and cried on her shoulder at the funeral. Her stomach had grown significantly, she was four months pregnant and starting to show. Bellatrix was aloof, steely and simmering. Regulus had opted not to attend, citing poor health.

She and James could barely look at each other during the service. Their interactions were brief, distant. Vera tried to hold his hand, but he brushed it aside.

“We will not stand idly, these halfbreeds will drown in their own blood,” she growled to her sister, who sniffed in agreement.

“I’ve spoken to the Minister,” Lucius replied, gathering his wife back in his arms. “They are tracking all suspected werewolves and bringing them to Azkaban until further notice, any that are involved in the attacks will be kissed.”

Bellatrix fumed, “That’s not enough! They need to be culled, if the Ministry doesn’t have the stomach to do so I will!”

“Bella, we’ve been over this.” Lucius replied as he darted his eyes around the room. There were Ministry officials present from Cygnus’s heyday, and they would talk if vigilante justice was served.

“Coward.” She spat, turning away.

Lucius shook his head, then turned to Vera. “Thank you for coming.”

“It was the least we could do,” Vera replied earnestly. 

“It was a beautiful service,” James added warmly.

Lucius gave a weak smile. Even now he could still be flattered.

“Still, you’ve been so supportive of Narcissa during this difficult time.”

Narcissa nuzzled into her husband’s chest. “We have been talking it over, and Lucius and I would like for you to be our child’s godmother, if you’d be willing.”

Vera tried to hide her surprise. “I’m touched, but why ask me? Wouldn’t you want a family member in this role?”

“Severa, without you this baby might not even be here. You and James are our closest friends, I can’t even imagine a time when you two weren’t at our house for dinner. Normally, I would have asked Bella, but she hasn’t been…”

“She’s completely inappropriate,” Lucius interrupted.

Narcissa flinched. “Yes, well. She isn’t the most nurturing person.”

“Neither am I,” Vera replied.

“But you do work in childcare,” Narcissa added.

“I teach defense, that’s hardly comparable,” Vera frowned.

“All the more reason then! I do hope you consider. Convince her for me, James. I would have asked you too, but Lucius’s father has to be the godfather, you do understand.”

“Of course, Narcissa. And I’ll try my best,” James replied jovially, his smile not quite reaching his eyes.

“Either way, we will see you next week for dinner?” Lucius asked.

“Wouldn’t miss it,” James grinned. When they apparated from Malfoy Manor, James dropped his smile and muttered, “I hate that bastard. Drinking with him is the true torture, he just talks about himself and his connections in the Ministry.”

Vera smirked. “Narcissa does the same thing, but about the social season.”

“They truly are made for each other.” James chuckled. Vera snorted.

They frowned, remembering the situation at hand.

“Have you heard from Remus?” Vera asked.

“No. You’re more likely to get in contact with him these days than I am.” James replied in suppressed frustration. These past few weeks had been tiresome. Even as the Yule holiday was almost over and their precious two weeks together were at an end, they still had no time to themselves.

“I could only see him through proper channels. Now that the truce is broken, it’s difficult. They keep moving, and they seem to be getting better at warring against detection charms.” Vera replied.

“Perhaps you were too good a teacher,” James remarked.

“I never taught them that, it’s probably Remus doing the casting.” Vera surmised.

“You don’t think he’s protecting them? After what they’re doing?” James asked in astonishment. “Their victims aren’t Death Eaters, they’re innocent people. Well, some of them are.”

“I don’t think he’s doing it for Greyback and his ilk, he’s probably doing it for the children in the pack. You’ve seen what they’re doing to anyone outed as a werewolf, I don’t think they’d be lenient on account of their age.”

James took off his glasses, sighed, and ran his hand through his hair. 

“Then what are our options? We can’t just leave him there. Especially not tonight, it’s the full moon, they’ll kill him.” James asked.

“We could try scrying. I’m sure the Ministry would be doing that if they had the resources. But we’d need a personal object, or a sample of his.” Vera replied thoughtfully.

“I...think he might have left his muffler here. From a few months ago.”

“That could work,” Vera responded. 

Vera reaches into the drawer and took out a box of chalk and a large crystal totem. Of course, these items were Dark, and highly illegal, but if used for teaching purposes, they could be displayed. Quickly, she drew a circle on the floor and placed the totem inside along with the muffler.

She took a deep breath, and recited the incantation.

As the guttural Sumerian dialect escaped her lips, a purple glow emerged from the totem. The scarf floated in the air and swirled, the fibers absorbing the light until an image of Remus appeared. He was coughing, hunched over and shivering, with an impressive shiner on his face. The light fractured, and shifted into coordinates.

“I’m going to kill those bastards, look at him!” James shouted. 

“So, he’s probably not there on his own free will,” Vera mused.

“We have to rescue him,” James replied determinately.

“I’ll go,” Vera stated. “They won’t know you, they might attack.”

“You’re a Death Eater, and you’re the one who caused this mess, they’re more likely to attack you than me. And he’s my friend, Vera.” James declared.

Vera looked at him, and felt her guilt creeping in. Her face softened. “All the more reason for me to go. I’ll fix this. You head to the Bluff, I’ll bring him there to spend the night in the cellars. They should be able to withstand a werewolf.”

“Leave me with the boring duties why don’t you?” James grumbled. “All right, and I’ll buff up our wards in case the werewolves and meet you there.”

Vera leaned in to kiss him, but he pushed her away. 

“Go, you haven’t got all day!” James shouted.

Vera nodded, then apparated.

She quickly strode into the makeshift werewolf camp, and noticed it was quiet, deathly still. Usually, the werewolves would gather outside around the fire over a meal, but no one was by the fire pit. 

“You have a lot of nerve showing up here after what you did.”

Vera turned to see Jan and the other leaders of the tribe. They were only in their trousers, scars running up and down their backs.

“I didn’t know it would come to this, I was deceived as much as you were,” Vera began.

“Liar!” Okeke cried. “Your Lord set up these sham magic lessons to humiliate us. You wizards think you can keep us in line and mock us, we’re just playthings to your whims!”

“Enough,” Jan chided. “She’ll soon get what’s coming to her. You’re here for your spy, aren’t you little witch?”

“You can’t lie to me, I know he’s here,” Vera replied in a clipped tone.

Jan smiled. “Indeed he is.”

He cast Expelliarmus, and Vera deflected. As she was focused on Jan, Stefan grabbed her, snatching the wand from her hand.

As Vera kicked and screamed, they tied her hands together and dragged her to a tent on the edge of the camp.

Covered in dirt and still screaming, Vera found herself face to face with Remus as the tent flap was opened.

“Vera!” Remus shouted. He rushed over to tend to her.

“Enjoy your reunion while you can, traitor. It’s only two hours until moonrise. Then, we can take satisfaction in watching you tear her limb from limb.” Jan grinned.

They closed the tent, and laughed as they departed.

“Vera, you can't be here, you have to leave now” Remus demanded, worry creeping into his hoarse voice.

“You look worse than usual, Lupin. And I had to come today. Any new targets tonight?”

“Vera, you have to get back. I overheard Greyback, and he’s planning on targeting James at the flat. He wants to hurt you, and me for causing this,” Remus rambled, bursting into a sob. “We have to stop him!”

Vera paled, bile rising in her throat. “No, we have to get you somewhere you can transform safely before the others kill you.”

Remus hastily untied her arms, while Vera was angrily writhing on the floor.

Vera peered through the tent. “They’re not keeping guard. If I can get my wand we can get out of here.”

“They took yours too? You’ll be hard pressed to get it back, I tried.”

“Then we’ll make a run for it.”

“We’re in the middle of nowhere, the nearest town is an hour away by foot. Once they transform, their speed will be able to overtake you- and me.” Remus replied.

Vera watched as Stefan played with her wand, shooting sparks and zapping his friend.

She took out a vial from her pocket, Shrinking Solution was highly flammable.

“Remus, could you throw this exactly at Stefan’s feet?”

Remus looked at the vial in her hand, and nodded. As the boy kept at his idiotic antics, he let out another round of sparks. 

And as he did, the vial made a perfect parabolic motion, glass smashing as the solution exploded, causing pandemonium.

Quickly, Vera and Remus ran into the fray. Vera grabbed her wand from the startled boy’s hand, pushing him away from the flames.

“Accio Remus’s wand!”

She felt the sudden slap of wood against her outstretched palm, and threw the wand to Remus, who grinned. 

They worked together to blast the oncoming crowd with spell after spell to incapacitate. Mostly stunners, though Remus spitefully cast a few choice jinxes at his captors. 

Vera grabbed his hand, and they apparated to the Bluff.

Once they landed outside the mansion, Vera cast a Patronus and hastily sent her message. She was lucky she could even think of anything positive in her current state of mind.

Remus didn’t say anything, letting Vera compose herself as she unlocked the cellar.

“I hope you remember to come back for me,” Remus replied, only half-joking.

“Godspeed,” Vera declared, closing the thick lead door behind her and warding it.

——————————————————-///-

 

James finished setting up the last ward and sighed in exhaustion. Ward building was physically demanding, and soon he’d have to spend the night as Prongs. He was only nineteen and was beginning to feel old.

Just one last diagnostic and then… James blinked. That couldn’t be right. There was someone outside the building, their presence was rippling against the wards he just built- to detect werewolves.

It was a ten minutes until moonrise. Was this intruder just going to wait to attack?

Suddenly, a silver doe floated into the flat through the window.

“James, you have to leave!” It spoke with Vera’s voice. “Greyback’s on his way, you are his next target. Please don’t do something stupid and try to fight him, just go! Meet me at the Bluff. Please, just stay safe.”

With that, the doe disappeared into wisps of silver.

James turned his back to the window and exhaled. He could apparate away, but then Greyback might attack the Muggles in his flat in retaliation. He sighed. He was going to have to ignore that request to stay safe.

So, he waited, staring at the plastic automatic wall clock that had come with the flat. It had a rather ugly picture of something called a Muppet on its face.

Five, four, three, two…

James transformed as the werewolf burst through the door mid-transformation. Greyback was still half man as he bounded towards him, his snout snarling in fury as his jaws gnashes the air, barely missing the stag’s hind legs as it jumped around the flat, dodging the wolf as it smashed furniture

Thinking quickly, Prongs broke the glass from the window with his antlers and darted down the fire escape, the wolf lumbering along as it followed him, getting caught in the metal steps.

He galloped quickly through the city streets of North London, the werewolf howling and following him through sidewalks, over alleyways, pushing over bins and moving cars. As Muggles screamed in horror, the wolf single-mindedly pursued its prey.

He hopped over the gate to Alexandra Park running through the grass, darting through the trees. Eventually, he found the local herd of deer and blended in as the herd ran through the park in the moonlight.

The wolf was beginning to tire. It howled in anger, running after the herd as they moved as one, too large to distinguish the individual. The wolf grabbed a stag, the largest of the herd, and pulled it down as it bleated and tried to push away. The wolf sank its teeth into its neck, and feasted.

Prongs ran with the herd, following them deeper into the park.

When the night retreated and the moon disappeared, James wearily returned to his flat and apparated to the Bluff.

——————————————————————

Greyback was found by the Department of Magical Law Enforcement the next morning after reports from Muggles about a strange feral wolf in the area. He was arrested and taken in for custody.

“They’re going to arrest the rest of the commune next,” Remus declared over breakfast. “I have to go back, see if I can convince any of them to leave.”

“They’re only going to arrest those suspected of committing the attacks,” Vera argued. 

“Do you honestly believe that?”

“Will they have you back?” Vera asked, eyebrow quirked.

“I have to try. Not all of them asked for this, and I’m not going to stand by and let them send children to Azkaban.” Remus declared with a steely glint in his eye.

“I’m coming with you,” James declared, lifting his hand to quiet Vera’s protests. Remus nodded, and they apparated.

Vera distracted herself by brewing. Mostly healing potions, and a batch of nutrient replenishing potion for Remus, and possibly whatever children he could scrounge. She asked Mopsy to bring out fresh linen for the guest rooms and prepare a hot meal.

James arrived four hours later. He drove up to the house in a dilapidated van with eight children, the smaller ones sitting on the laps of the older ones.

He carried the smallest, a four year old who had fallen asleep, in his arms.

“What happened, where’s Remus?” Vera asked nervously.

“Greyback turned us in,” Weronika replied bitterly. “The wizards came and arrested our parents.”

Markus, a small wiry boy of eight, chimed in. “Remus tried to get all of us to go, mostly us and our mums, but they weren’t going to leave.”

“Of course not,” Weronika replied. “We’re family, we stick together.”

“One of them offered me their car when I said I couldn’t Side-Along everyone at once. The DMLE has already arrived so we legged it,” James added. “Remus was arrested too.”

“So, you drove back?” Vera asked skeptically.

James fidgeted. “Trust me, it’s better this way. This lot needed the time to cope.”

“We don’t need to cope with anything. We should be going straight to the Ministry. Or parents didn’t do anything wrong!” Weronika cried.

The other children started to complain as well, the little ones beginning to cry.

“Silence,” Vera commanded. “If your parents wanted you in our care, they obviously wanted to protect you. Don’t throw that away. I’m sure all of you are hungry, please follow Mopsy into the dining room for supper. I need to have a word with James.”

When the children were out of earshot, she whispered, “What’s our next move?”

“I’ll have to ask around, but word is that they’re planning to make an example of them. They might get the Kiss,” James replied gravely.

Vera pursed her lips. “They can’t do that, they have no proof anyone else was involved besides Greyback.”

“Fudge doesn’t see it that way, neither does Bagnold. Doubt it will even get to trial. This is too high profile, has been since the Black murder.”

The Prophet gleefully declared that a special sector of Azkaban would be designated for the crop of werewolves, who had been deemed guilty in the court of martial law, while Greyback and most male werewolves were to be sent under the Dementor’s Kiss. Their names were published on the front page, Remus was in the middle of the list.

Sirius apparated into the house furious.

“Aright you nonce, I know you’ve seen the Prophet. I went over to you flat and saw it’s completely trashed. What I want to know is how much you knew…”

Sirius paused as he saw the dining table populated by children, Vera pouring juice, and James trying to cut up a fried egg into small pieces for a fussy four year old.

“So, you knew everything.”

“Padfoot, it’s not like that.” James protested.

“Then how is it, James? Our friend is about to be executed, and we’re helpless to do anything about it. And I’m guessing it’s your fault Scervix. You wouldn’t help these kids otherwise.”

Vera sighed. “You are correct. It is my fault, but the blame isn’t mine alone.”

“Perhaps it’s time we told you the truth, Sirius.” James declared, ushering Sirius into the study.

——————————————————————

“You two are unbelievable,” Sirius muttered. “Not only did you lie to me, you worked with the Death Eaters and recruited Moony.”

“We’re double agents, as you’ve conveniently forgotten. And what I’ve told you is on a need to know basis. You-Know-Who is mortal, but he needs to be defeated.”

“I get that. I’m an Order Member for Gods sake.” Sirius replied acidly. “The point is you didn’t tell me, and I thought we were a team.”

“Would you have agreed to work with your brother? Or do you think he would have been willing to work with us if you were involved?” James asked.

“Low blow. But when Remus found out, that should have been your cue to bring in me and Peter. We could have helped you. I wouldn’t have...I would have understood.”

“Maybe you’re right,” James replied wearily. “It's about time I told Peter too. Maybe he’ll be more forgiving than you.”

“He does have the patience of a saint, the poor sod.” Sirius chuckled. “No more lies?”

He raised his hand towards James, who grasped it firmly. 

“No more lies.”

They shook hands, and Sirius wrapped his arms around his friend, ruffling his hair.

“I don’t think your wife was faking it though. She really did try to kill me.”

“Get in line,” James laughed.

Sirius looked at the children obliviously eating breakfast.

“What are you going to do about them?” Sirius murmured.

“No clue,” James replied, biting his lip. “Vera and I had talked about starting a family. I guess adopting eight werewolves is a good start.” 

————————————————————————

 

Sirius stayed for most of the day, leaving after dinner. He’d offered to teach them flying, and James had plenty of spare brooms.

For the first time in months, James saw a genuine smile on Sirius’s face.

“Not bad. Next week I’ll teach you lot the basics of Quidditch, and we can have a proper team by the end of the month,” he declared.

While this statement elicited various levels of interest, it wasn’t about Quidditch at all, it was a statement of normalcy, and hope there would be a next week. Everyone noticed that.

Once dinner was served, and everyone was put to bed, Vera knocked on the study door.

“I’m surprised to find you here, James.” She purred.

“I’ve been finding myself here more often these days. Most of the time Mum practically lived here,” James mused.

The was a pause, before Vera tried to speak, “James…”

“I know it was irresponsible to bring them here, and I know we might be prolonging the inevitable, but I had to. How can we guarantee them a future? And what can we do about Remus?” 

James ran his hand through his hair and slumped his head on the weathered oak desk. He groaned.

“We’ll manage,” Vera replied stoically. She walked over, and gently placed her hand on his shoulder.

“Don’t,” James protested.

“Are you going to be like this then?” Vera snapped. “I don't know how I can make it up to you, it was a mistake.”

“Was it?” James turned to face her, hot tears in his eyes. “Or are you saying that because nothing happened.”

“James, I love you. But I was confused.”

“Well I’m not. I’ve known how I felt about you, and I might not have liked it at first, but falling for you has changed me. But you’re still the same. You keep pushing me away and hurting me. How can I know I’ll ever be able trust you again?” He asked.

“You can’t. I could disappoint you again, but it isn’t because I’m not trying.” Vera replied quietly, almost a whisper.

“Do you love me, Vera? Not partly, not could you, do you love me?” James pleaded, his eyes meeting hers.

Vera’s face crumpled as she nodded. She wiped her eyes, sniffling.

“Not that it matters. The Dark Lord is mortal, our mission has concluded. We can get an annulment at any time you’d wish.” Vera said in a strained voice.

“That’s the problem. As pathetic as it sounds, I don’t want to. I want to try again, and I want to forgive you if you’ll have me. I saw your Patronus. I know what you said is true, I just needed to hear it.”

Vera couldn’t hold it any longer, she burst into tears and knelt down, embracing James into a watery kiss. They fell onto the floor, kissing and pulling off each other’s clothes as their limbs entangled in one another. James’s hands explored her body, running over her breasts as he grabbed her on her side, taking her from behind as Vera gripped the Persian carpet. 

They collapsed into a heap, Vera burying her face in the crook of his neck, smelling his skin as she clung to him.

“I love you,” she whispered.

James kissed her, and smiled. “I love you too.”  
———————————————————————

In the end, all it took to save Remus was a well placed word from Dumbledore, and to take a page from Lucius Malfoy, a very large bribe. 

They aren’t as lucky with the others. For Weronika’s sake, James tried to jockey favor to Wizengamot members to save Jan, but as Greyback’s second in command it was too much.

“I don’t know why you’re doing this James,” Lucius stated in exasperation as he saw him leave the chambers after the hearing. “It’s political suicide, why are you willing to help these monsters after what they’ve done to us?”

“I owe this much to his daughter,” James replied. “I hate him, but he’s all she has.”

“Ah Yes, I’d forgotten your side project with those orphans. You we much too kind to these brats, I’d watch out if I was you, they’re not like us. A bit too untamed” Lucius scowled. He lowered his voice, “But it’s great for your image, taking them in. If you have a few you could spare, Bella might want to buy a few off your hands.”

“I must be going now, Lucius. We must catch up again soon,” James replied irritably.

Lucius bowed. “You must come over to the Manor before the baby arrives. I’ll be in desperate need for adult company before too long.”

James grinned wryly, “The joys of parenthood. You’ll get used to it soon.” He hoped Lucius’s child was a screamer.

In the end, the Ministry wanted to make an example of them and distract the public from the war.

Fenrir Greyback was kissed by a Dementor on February 10, 1980. It was made open to the public, and a broadcast was taped on the Wireless as a warning to all beings to tried to cross the wizards, Light or Dark. His followers were kissed privately the day after.

Remus stood and watched in his seat, gripping James’s hand.

When they left the Ministry, Remus was listless. As they climbed out of the loo and headed to the street, he turned towards James.

“The Order thinks I should lie low, leave the country until this blows over,” he confessed.

James’s eyebrows rose. “Will you?”

Remus shook his head. “I can’t. The commune’s gone, but most of them are still out there, and the kids are probably going to be separated.”

“Not as long as Vera and I are alive,” James interjected.

“But you two work full time, I can’t place that responsibility on you. I’ll look after them, see if I can find the mothers at least and help them finish their studies.” Remus decided firmly.

“You’re not doing this alone, Moony. Why don’t you and the kids stay at the Bluff? It’s fortified enough to handle the transformations, and there’s plenty of food. At the very least, it’ll provide some stability.”

Remus looked reluctant.

“It’s not charity. I’m offering this because they’re my kids too.” James added. “And Sirius might drop by every now and then to play Quidditch. Reg is thinking of stopping by too.”

“You told Sirius? And Reg as in Regulus?” Remus asked in surprise.

James grinned. “A lot happened while you were gone, we’ll catch you up later. Then we’ll tell Peter.”

Remus scoffed, “About ruddy time.”


End file.
